Poll of the Day > Not the Onion 2023 edition - silly news and bungery

(+) Yeah! (+)

Hersheys being sued for not disclosing some of their dark chocolate has lead and/or cadmium in it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrK1N0IfBB0

I had some fancy dinner for ma aunts birthday... now I got a mad stummy ache; Kobe and scallops was too much

Anyways: The taliban simps for tate

https://www.newsweek.com/taliban-worried-about-andrew-tate-they-ask-his-freedom-1770693

Wisconsin is clogged with fat

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/dairy-plant-fire-melted-butter-clogs-storm-drains-portage-canal-wisconsin/

Same

https://www.vice.com/en/article/m7gdny/man-legally-changed-gender-to-gain-custody-of-his-kids-trans-groups-are-concerned

The trans-rights movement has been the greatest thing to happen for gender equality in decades.
I love that people are upset she used the laws in supposed "bad faith", and not that the child custody laws are blatantly sexist.

School shooting by a 6 year old

https://www.cbsnews.com/live-updates/richneck-elementary-school-shooting-newport-news-virginia/

Lokarin posted...

School shooting by a 6 year old

https://www.cbsnews.com/live-updates/richneck-elementary-school-shooting-newport-news-virginia/

.................what is this world coming to?

for the funny ones, remember the rule is to come up with a funny tag line

:

Wells Fargo pisses your money away

https://www.channelnewsasia.com/business/wells-fargo-sacks-top-banking-executive-urinating-plane-passenger-3188221

If you die in the game you die for real

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/9/6/7/AADnJsAAEEfX.jpg

Art history teacher fired for teaching art history.

https://news.artnet.com/art-world/professor-terminated-art-history-paintings-muhammad-2238922/amp-page

slacker03150 posted...

Art history teacher fired for teaching art history.

https://news.artnet.com/art-world/professor-terminated-art-history-paintings-muhammad-2238922/amp-page

that's funny

Art Teacher: "Islam is not a monolith, there were sects ok with this"

One Muslim: "This is Islamophobia and offensive to all muslims throughout time and space REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"

She did give them time to opt out of seeing it Why didnt anyone who didnt want to see it leave? I feel that would have been better than staying, and getting mad about it

https://www.wlj.net/top_headlines/report-claims-candy-cereal-are-healthier-than-beef-pork/article_44c1fcd0-1fd7-11ed-850a-db38897b42ab.html

Processed sugary junk food is healthier than meat. lulz, yeah sure

LinkPizza posted...

She did give them time to opt out of seeing it Why didnt anyone who didnt want to see it leave? I feel that would have been better than staying, and getting mad about it

Because then the student (it was one singular cry-bully) wouldn't get her 5 minutes of fame and the teacher wouldn't have been fired.
Saw about this on the politics board. The Muslim groups couldn't help themselves from comparing the respectful depiction of Mohammed (painted by a Muslim, mind you) to having a class on why hitler did some good things, actually.
Really made my blood boil.

What gets me about the whole "don't depict Muhammad" thing is that the root concern is that doing so risks presenting the depiction as an idol and distracting from the things Muhammad represents. At its core, that's a moderately sensible philosophy, but to go from that to "anyone who depicts Muhammad must be made to suffer, regardless of the context" just makes no sense, especially when it's non-Muslims doing so who are neither supposed to be worshipping Muhammad nor are in any risk of worshipping the depiction as an idol.

If anything, it seems that some Muslims worship the absence of depictions of Muhammad as an idol, above what he actually represents.

Cow burglars?

https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/montreal/fugitive-cows-in-quebec-captured-and-returned-home-after-months-on-the-run-1.6707827

adjl posted...

If anything, it seems that some Muslims worship the absence of depictions of Muhammad as an idol, above what he actually represents.

This is absolutely true

geico not responsible for girl getting std in car

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/geico-std-car-5-million-award-vacated-by-judges/

One wonders how Geico was supposed to be responsible for such a thing in the first place...

Women lawmakers in Missouri no longer allowed to show forearms

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2023/jan/14/missouri-female-legislators-clothing-debate-week-in-patriarchy

^if the south tries to leave the union, can we just let them this time?

Conspiracy theorist says conspiracy theorists shouldn't be on committees

https://www.newsweek.com/lauren-boebert-conspiracy-theorists-intel-committee-schiff-swalwell-1774041

Lokarin posted...

Conspiracy theorist says conspiracy theorists shouldn't be on committees

https://www.newsweek.com/lauren-boebert-conspiracy-theorists-intel-committee-schiff-swalwell-1774041

Hey some people are seldom aware. Like ill tell you point blank I ain't fit to govern a country. My job has cause me to have very little sympathy for idiots.

Reminds me of Epic's "Grungification"

16 year old tests out brand new VR Grand Theft Auto game

https://www.cbsnews.com/chicago/news/teen-charged-dozen-carjackings-south-southwest-sides/

Metal Gear!

https://www.extremetech.com/extreme/342413-us-marines-defeat-darpa-robot-by-hiding-under-a-cardboard-box

Lokarin posted...

Metal Gear!

https://www.extremetech.com/extreme/342413-us-marines-defeat-darpa-robot-by-hiding-under-a-cardboard-box

Kojima predicts the future again

Republicans mad at xbox changes

https://www.newsweek.com/microsoft-changes-xbox-console-climate-change-republicans-ted-cruz-1776054

Lokarin posted...

Republicans mad at xbox changes

https://www.newsweek.com/microsoft-changes-xbox-console-climate-change-republicans-ted-cruz-1776054

I don't understand people who are mad at energy efficiency.

No! I want to pay more in gas/power!

Louisana prisoners are overstaying their welcom...

https://www.cnn.com/2023/01/25/politics/louisiana-department-of-correction-justice-department/index.html

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/4/5/7/AAFUswAAEIBx.jpg

AI Lawyer forced to quit from threats from "big legal"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-gvArVKfUM

Federal agent used government car for uber/lyft

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usROouji2OE

Florida schools remove ALL books to stay state compliant

https://www.news4jax.com/news/local/2023/01/27/parents-react-to-empty-classroom-library-shelves-as-dcps-continues-book-review/

Groundhog Day disaster in Canada

https://www.insider.com/groundhog-day-quebec-fred-la-marmotte-dies-before-making-prediction-2023-2

Not again!

https://variety.com/2023/tv/global/netflix-squid-game-reality-show-frozen-inhumane-welfare-1235511809/

Lokarin posted...

Groundhog Day disaster in Canada

https://www.insider.com/groundhog-day-quebec-fred-la-marmotte-dies-before-making-prediction-2023-2

that just means they prodict endless winter winter apolxalpse

Lauren Boebert dismayed America 'only' owns 46% of the world's guns

https://www.newsweek.com/lauren-boebert-dismayed-americans-only-own-46-percent-worlds-firearms-1778382

Monkey Love Mystery solved.... it was a glory hole!

https://geartape.com/japanese-zoo-solves-mystery-of-isolated-gibbons-pregnancy/

There is no glory here

montana to ban science

https://www.mtpr.org/montana-news/2023-02-07/bill-would-ban-the-teaching-of-scientific-theories-in-montana-schools

Misery votes against banning guns from children

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2023/feb/09/missouri-rejects-ban-children-carrying-guns-in-public

George Santos steals puppies

https://www.cnbc.com/2023/02/09/george-santos-was-charged-with-theft-in-dog-case.html

Man kills when MRI sets off his gun

https://www.kiro7.com/news/trending/lawyer-dies-after-he-is-shot-by-gun-that-was-triggered-by-mri-scanner/AVXLS5PGDZC7PL4HZUIT3EDURU/

Lokarin posted...

Man kills when MRI sets off his gun

https://www.kiro7.com/news/trending/lawyer-dies-after-he-is-shot-by-gun-that-was-triggered-by-mri-scanner/AVXLS5PGDZC7PL4HZUIT3EDURU/

Oh he died? I saw the story when it was new. If only a good mri machine with a gun had been there to stop the bad mri machine with a gun.

Who thought keeping their gun on for an MRI was a good idea, Darwin Award right there

Zareth posted...

Who thought keeping their gun on for an MRI was a good idea, Darwin Award right there

he wasn't IN the MRI, but ya - he fudged the risk consent form

Oompa Loompa beware the OSHA

https://apnews.com/article/occupational-safety-and-health-administration-pennsylvania-business-c434508ff07c5fdc3bbeb6c23b130d40

Man accidentally shoots friend thinking his gun was unloaded... for the 10th time

https://geartape.com/man-accidentally-shoots-friend-thinking-the-gun-was-unloaded-like-previous-10-times-he-pointed-it-as-a-joke/

Lesbian mom loses child and wife to baby's sperm dono

https://www.nbcnews.com/nbc-out/out-news/lesbian-mom-loses-parental-rights-wife-childs-sperm-donor-rcna70884

BONUS:

Utah shoots down bill requiring golf courses to report how much water they use

https://www.sltrib.com/news/environment/2023/02/15/utah-lawmakers-say-more/