Poll of the Day > Would you date someone that didn't graduate from high school?

(+) Yeah! (+)

I took a girl on a camping date back in the summer. We had met once like 10 years ago and both obviously had the hots for one another, so it finally happened.

I found that she was really pushy with boundaries (time, 'this is what's happening with me today so you're along for the ride'). She wasn't vaccinated, and claimed to be 'really' afraid of needles, and her own father wasn't talking to her over it. She wanted to watch Titanic, and told me she hadn't graduated high school.

It took me a while to reflect on all of this because I got pretty consumed with school right away after. I also pushed back when she posted a:

*trigger warning*
'self harm' meme that was just a knife and it said 'when the intrusive thoughts tell you to stab yourself when you're doing the dishes'

I've dealt with intrusive thoughts, and while I advocate talking about them, I think you need to precurse a conversation of that sort. Instead of...literally posting images and phrases that could be very triggering to those that experience them. I'd rather see your face saying "I'm dealing with violent intrusive thoughts and need someone to talk to".

some people exhaust me. I feel like an asshole eventually cutting people off, but I have literal schizophrenic friends that communicate better than this lady. she followed me again today (didn't know she unfollowed me) and I really don't want to read the message she's sent me even though I said we should still be friends lol.

was fingerblasting the butthole worth it? smh idk

Sure, I could teach them how to read

Could be a lot of different issues but reminds me a lot of BPD. Sometimes we crave connection and validation so much that we express ourselves in ways that end up being harmful to even if that isnt the intent.

Not an excuse for the behavior by any means, but I think thats often the cause for it in a lot of people.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

There is none. I just combined a poll and a garbage story about my life.

Eh depends. I guess.

It really depends on the individual, I've known some really intelligent individuals who never attended any formal institution of learning, but I've also known individuals with advanced degrees that I question how they don't seriously injure themselves getting dressed in the morning.

I think you have to ask: Is this someone who at least makes the attempts to be a better person?

If they are a dumpster fire that goes out seeking gasoline, fireworks and crowded spaces, they are not worth the time, but if they are at least make the attempt to close the lid, find some water or retardant foam, maybe all they really need is a friend who can be there for them.

ReturnOfFa posted...

There is none. I just combined a poll and a garbage story about my life.

psychological issues can certainly run parallel with difficulties functioning in an academic environment

I didnt graduate from high school

High school vs not finishing high school is pretty much meaningless since the American public education system is gloried babysitting. High school vs bachelors is a more meaningful distinction but, honestly, even there it's weak. In general, unless you're still in your early 20s, educational attainment is a piss-poor means of evaluating a person. If you're trying to decide on a serious romantic partner, you need better metrics and they should specifically tie into what you want from the relationship.

However, if you're just screwing around and not looking for anything serious, none of that matters because you can't stick your dick in a girl's degree... well, you CAN, they just get mad at you for ruining their degree when they find out.

I've seen a lot of people talk about "intrusive thoughts" lately like it's some kind of mental disorder, or something to be concerned about. It's really not. It's perfectly normal to have fucked up self destructive thoughts pop into your head. There's an old french term for it, L'appel du vide (the call of the void). Just let it come and go. It's only when you fixate on it that it becomes a problem.

Ozmose posted...

I've seen a lot of people talk about "intrusive thoughts" lately like it's some kind of mental disorder, or something to be concerned about. It's really not. It's perfectly normal to have fucked up self destructive thoughts pop into your head. There's an old french term for it, L'appel du vide (the call of the void). Just let it come and go. It's only when you fixate on it that it becomes a problem.

it's definitely possible for it to be severe enough to be distressing/interfere with your quality of life. it's a symptom of OCD

"just let it go" would be weird to say about any other symptom of mental illness lol

That first post though lmao

More red flags than a Soviet parade, jfc

faramir77 posted...

That first post though lmao

More red flags than a Soviet parade, jfc

Especially that part about wanting to watch Titanic. Yeesh!

They'd better have a really good story because high school is an absolute joke, so if it's simply that they couldn't pass then the answer is no.

Ozmose posted...

I've seen a lot of people talk about "intrusive thoughts" lately like it's some kind of mental disorder, or something to be concerned about. It's really not. It's perfectly normal to have fucked up self destructive thoughts pop into your head. There's an old french term for it, L'appel du vide (the call of the void). Just let it come and go. It's only when you fixate on it that it becomes a problem.

thank you I needed to hear this

Dated one, but she gotten a GED instead. She had dropped out due to getting preggo her Jr year.

Absolutely not. Means the person made horrible decisions in their life and I want nothing to do with them.

In my opinion, when you meet someone you like and you decide to date, everything else is out the window in my opinion. I've dated women who I thought when I met them that we wouldn't hit it off and we did and the women I've dated who I thought I was compatible with I wasn't so you never know but I never set boundaries when it comes to dating.

Graduating high school and not graduating high school are pretty equivalent nowadays if you aren't going to college. Even then a GED is pretty easy to obtain. High school is almost unnecessary if you aren't planning to go to college. I would almost say it's better to drop out as early as possible and start going to work if you aren't going to go to college. But I guess almost every student plans to go these days

OhhhJa posted...

Graduating high school and not graduating high school are pretty equivalent nowadays if you aren't going to college. Even then a GED is pretty easy to obtain. High school is almost unnecessary if you aren't planning to go to college. I would almost say it's better to drop out as early as possible and start going to work if you aren't going to go to college. But I guess almost every student plans to go these days

I would go that far. I mean, most jobs I've worked required either a High school diploma or a GED (The ones I got after high school, at least). But in most cases, you can't get a GED until 18. So, if you have no reason to, might as well get it. Or try until you're 18. After that, you can drop out and get your GED if you fail...

LinkPizza posted...

I would go that far. I mean, most jobs I've worked required either a High school diploma or a GED (The ones I got after high school, at least). But in most cases, you can't get a GED until 18. So, if you have no reason to, might as well get it. Or try until you're 18. After that, you can drop out and get your GED if you fail...

No job that only requires high school education will ever check if you actually graduated high school though lol

And they probably wouldn't even care if you didn't

OhhhJa posted...

No job that only requires high school education will ever check if you actually graduated high school though lol

And they probably wouldn't even care if you didn't

Maybe some won't. When I was applying for a few different jobs, I had to bring a copy of my diploma with me to even be considered. So some actually will...

LinkPizza posted...

Maybe some won't. When I was applying for a few different jobs, I had to bring a copy of my diploma with me to even be considered. So some actually will...

That is really really strange. I've never been asked to do that nor ever heard of anyone else having to

Yes, I am right now. He got his GED.

OhhhJa posted...

That is really really strange. I've never been asked to do that nor ever heard of anyone else having to

Ive seen it plenty of times. The only time is a job where high schoolers can work, and jobs where you need a degree for a specialized job

This gal didn't have her GED at 30. I'm definitely being a judgemental ass, but I was quietly a bit shocked in the back of my head lmao.

Yes. Education isn't a requirement for me to date people. I'd be hypocritical if it was and I've met some really nice people from many walks of life.

Arin from Game Grumps didn't graduate from high school and he's doing pretty good

ReturnOfFa posted...

This gal didn't have her GED at 30. I'm definitely being a judgemental ass, but I was quietly a bit shocked in the back of my head lmao.

Not everyone has an upbringing that is conducive to finishing high school or starting life as an adult not stunted. Instead of judging, you should recognize the privileges you had that others may not have had.

Kanatteru posted...

it's definitely possible for it to be severe enough to be distressing/interfere with your quality of life. it's a symptom of OCD

"just let it go" would be weird to say about any other symptom of mental illness lol

That said, it's completely possible voluntarily fixate on such things without realizing it, and "just letting it go" can improve one's mental state once they realize that they're doing it. Trying and failing to let it go can also be a useful indicator of an unrecognized mental illness, so it's worth at least trying. Worst case scenario, you can't, and that helps you understand more about yourself and the kind of help you need.

Well, actual worst case scenario, you can't, and then you end up feeling like a deficient human being who doesn't deserve to live, but that's where the rest of us come in and encourage mentally unwell people to seek the treatment they need to live the lives they deserve because there's no shame in being sick, so hopefully that gets us back to the better worst case scenario.

BUMPED2002 posted...

In my opinion, when you meet someone you like and you decide to date, everything else is out the window in my opinion. I've dated women who I thought when I met them that we wouldn't hit it off and we did and the women I've dated who I thought I was compatible with I wasn't so you never know but I never set boundaries when it comes to dating.

Pretty much. In practice, I'm probably not going to hit it off with somebody that doesn't have at least high school/a GED, if not some university, but learning that somebody hasn't finished high school isn't going to be a dealbreaker if I've already had my interest piqued.

Jen0125 posted...

Yes, I am right now. He got his GED.

I mean, it's really hard to graduate HS while swinging webs around town and saving everyone all the time. Good for him getting his GED though!!

As long as she's not a commie who screams about how awful society is because she made poor choices in life (the usual lack of accountability).

The_tall_midget posted...

As long as she's not a commie who screams about how awful society is because she made poor choices in life (the usual lack of accountability).

Does anything in your life not revolve around communism

the_tall_midget spends his entire life thinking of fictional people to get mad about

Kanatteru posted...

the_tall_midget spends his entire life thinking of fictional people to get mad about

Impossible. That would require him to think in the first place, which he's incapable of

jiffdiff posted...

They'd better have a really good story because high school is an absolute joke, so if it's simply that they couldn't pass then the answer is no.

It's never a matter that they can't pass because people get held back, it's that they drop out.

LinkPizza posted...

I would go that far. I mean, most jobs I've worked required either a High school diploma or a GED (The ones I got after high school, at least). But in most cases, you can't get a GED until 18. So, if you have no reason to, might as well get it. Or try until you're 18. After that, you can drop out and get your GED if you fail...

Let's be honest here: First, most shit-level jobs for a long time have asked for a bachelors, not just a HS diploma (because bachelors are a dime a dozen and the labor market was tight for a while). Second, they don't really need either. Third, and most importantly, demonstrable skills matter more than education (outside of fields where government mandates are a thing) and most of the really wildly successful people work for themselves or are appointed to a position. And finally, public education is always going to be garbage because you're trying to teach to a median.

LinkPizza posted...

Maybe some won't. When I was applying for a few different jobs, I had to bring a copy of my diploma with me to even be considered. So some actually will...

You're in Canada, though, right? That might just be a Canadian thing. From my very first job to my most recent one, I've never *once* been asked to prove any of my educational achievements.

ReturnOfFa posted...

This gal didn't have her GED at 30. I'm definitely being a judgemental ass, but I was quietly a bit shocked in the back of my head lmao.

Let's be honest here -- if somebody dropped out and they've gotten by fine without a GED, why would they just decide to go back for it later on? Unless they need it for something, they're going to go without.

I never finished my MBA (because I switched jobs and went from an employer who covered 75% to one who covered 0%) and, considering it hasn't really made a difference, I'm not sure I'll ever go back and that's something that actually *can* have an impact, unlike a GED. My bachelors was discussed while interviewing for my first few jobs after college, but after that everybody has always looked at work history or, more likely, it's a connection I either already have or a personal recommendation so even the previous work history takes a bit of a backseat in the discussion.

Zeus posted...

Let's be honest here -- if somebody dropped out and they've gotten by fine without a GED, why would they just decide to go back for it later on? Unless they need it for something, they're going to go without.

I never finished my MBA (because I switched jobs and went from an employer who covered 75% to one who covered 0%) and, considering it hasn't really made a difference, I'm not sure I'll ever go back and that's something that actually *can* have an impact, unlike a GED. My bachelors was discussed while interviewing for my first few jobs after college, but after that everybody has always looked at work history or, more likely, it's a connection I either already have or a personal recommendation so even the previous work history takes a bit of a backseat in the discussion.

Dad's credit card definitely helped with 'getting by'.

Kanatteru posted...

the_tall_midget spends his entire life thinking of fictional people to get mad about

Oh yes, whiny idiots who made poor choices in life and then blames the "system" at large or simply capitalism. Such people are soooooooo fictional. I mean, it's not like we could not find at least 5 on this forum.

I would date an old boot if I felt like it would give me some attention.

Probably not.

Hard to say - since I haven't really dated since High School (well - and a couple years after).

Zeus posted...

You're in Canada, though, right? That might just be a Canadian thing. From my very first job to my most recent one, I've never *once* been asked to prove any of my educational achievements.

Nope. US. Mostly in Maryland and Texas...

ReturnOfFa posted...

Dad's credit card definitely helped with 'getting by'.

Which is a bigger issue than her having or not having a degree, diploma, or GED.

LinkPizza posted...

Nope. US. Mostly in Maryland and Texas...

I have a cousin in Texas, and he's never mentioned ever needing to show proof of his education when looking for work, and that really seems like the kind of thing he'd mention if it was common.

UnMead posted...

I would date an old boot if I felt like it would give me some attention.

it will tongue your foot, if you are into that sort of thing

Zeus posted...

Let's be honest here -- if somebody dropped out and they've gotten by fine without a GED, why would they just decide to go back for it later on? Unless they need it for something, they're going to go without.

This is definitely the case if you can get a tradesman certification of some kind, where they care less about what level of schooling you've passed as opposed to what practical skills you have in a specific field.

Apprentice to a plumber or an electrician, get a plumbing or electrician certification, and join your local union/guild, and you'll have a much easier time getting jobs in that field than someone who "only" has a high school diploma or GED will have getting jobs period. And the tradesman will probably be making more money from it.

The real problem is that we're currently undergoing a period of "education inflation", where the high school degree has been almost completely devalued in favor of the college degree, but the college education/degree has yet to become a basic service (the way primary school/K-12 is). So we've created this weird void where, if you just get the high school diploma but don't proceed on to a BA or BS (or something equivilent), the high school diploma/GED isn't actually worth all that much anyway. And then people wind up putting themselves into debt to chase the college degree that's effectively become the entry-level degree that the high school degree used to be.

The problem with technological revolution is that it usually takes at least a few generations (or a few dozen generations) for societal and cultural factors to catch up to the new reality. And technology is mostly advancing faster than we can adapt to it at this point.