Board 8 > It's making sounds inside. It's going to hatch soon. Oh?

(+) Yeah! (+)

TOMBOLO came out of her egg!

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Love you!

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I knew I should've gone with the ol' evolution bit for title purposes, but I had to go with the funnier and more accurate but less attention grabby one <_>

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AND my sig doesn't work >:\

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why leave the egg, it's nice and comfortable inside

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it wasn't tho!

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oh no bad EGG

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I will corrupt you all mwahaha

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Congrats!

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Good egg has arrived
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congratulations!

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Congrats!

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Awwww

Congrats!

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Is this you coming out as trans?

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Congrats, and I wish you all the best in everything that follows

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I just want you to know that in spite of your initial doubt about your choice of announcement, I enjoyed it and got the message right away. Anyway congrats on joining the cool people club and hopefully unlike Pokemon you won't have to get into fights with everyone who makes eye contact with you

Congrats!

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Congrats!

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Woo go Bolo!

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oh also congrats!

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Wait is this not a baby topic

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MZero posted...

Wait is this not a baby topic

it is a trans topic but that was a good guess too lol

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Congrats. I thought it was a coming out topic but I didn't want to say anything when it was first posted in case I misinterpreted and it would've been awkward.

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why cant it be both

(congrats)

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Tom Bombadil posted...

TOMBOLO came out of her egg!

I love this

Llarian posted...

Love you!

I also love this

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Tom Bombadil posted...

it is a trans topic but that was a good guess too lol

Oh ok, I knew the egg reference is used in that regard. Congratulations and I hope you find all the happiness and support you need to make it as easy as possible.

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Congrats!

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Congrats!


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I found the topic just ambiguous enough that I wasn't totally sure if it was about what I thought it was. Anyway, congrats.

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Congrats!

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Tombola

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Happy for you!

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Good luck in your next chapter!

I also read this as a baby topic at first

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Congratulations!

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Oops I clicked this topic the first time and didnt get it, coming back now I see.

Congrats! If you dont mind me asking, what should we call you now?

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I actually am not sure what to go by on the internet now, lol. A lot of the secret girl accounts I made use my real name, but I'm not sure that's a good idea now that I'll be linking them back to me more openly. Tombolo and Bolo are still fine I think! Tom I'm not sure about. I probably will kinda phase that out elsewhere, but it's been my name here for so long lol.

what we really gotta do is have icon come up with something again

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Thought this was about a baby for a moment there.

But congratulations! I'm happy you were able to come out! When did you know, if you don't mind sharing?

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Count me among the people who thought this was a baby announcement lol. Anyway, I don't know you but it's always exciting to see someone feel comfortable enough to be themselves, congrats!

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Huh that's really surprising to me.

Not so much because you came off as super manly to me as much as you seemed like someone who was pretty gender fluid. Like I never really saw you as particularly effeminate or masculine I guess so I'm surprised that it really mattered enough to you to bother to identify as the other gender.

But such is the power of the Internet I suppose-- you don't really know anyone well enough to make that determination even if you've interacted with them for 15 years.

More power to ya in any case.

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Tom Bombadil posted...

I actually am not sure what to go by on the internet now, lol. A lot of the secret girl accounts I made use my real name, but I'm not sure that's a good idea now that I'll be linking them back to me more openly. Tombolo and Bolo are still fine I think! Tom I'm not sure about. I probably will kinda phase that out elsewhere, but it's been my name here for so long lol.

what we really gotta do is have icon come up with something again

obviously you want "Goldberry"

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Dark Young Link posted...

When did you know, if you don't mind sharing?

I'd say beginning of 2020, but it was a slow burn for a few years before then

Lopen posted...

I'm surprised that it really mattered enough to you to bother to identify as the other gender.

this is kinda how I viewed it myself for a long time to be fair! I remember vibing with Haruhi from Ouran when she didn't really care much either way. Then later it was like "wait I actually like being a girl tho"

NFUN posted...

obviously you want "Goldberry"

this is a strong contender ngl

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I mean maybe my read was closer to correct than I thought then, and then on that front I think we're somewhat similar in that regard, which is why I think I brought it up to begin with. Because it's an interesting discussion for people who aren't super heavily one way or the other to me.

So in my case I have some traits I'd call effeminate. I also think it would be more "fun" to be a woman because of better fashion options, mostly. Really shallow I know. Probably offensive to some people too-- I'm not trying to imply people generally identify as a woman because they wanna wear cute skirts dammit. Though I wouldn't judge if they did-- that's not where I'm going with this!

Anyway in the end it boils down to that I simply find women more attractive (a lot of men are good looking, some even more attractive to me than most women, but to say I'm even bi-curious would be a stretch) and am biologically a man at birth which makes things a whole lot easier on the whole to just be a man, because while I'm not what I'd call "manly" by any stretch I don't really feel super effeminate either.

Ultimately I'm sorta like "why bother" it's just not a super important part of what makes me me in the end. Like for the "fun" element of being a woman I think if I really get the itch for women's fashion I'll just take up cross dressing. Manly as hell cross dressing.

So where I'm going in this rambling tirade here is I'm curious if there was any sort of catalyst that made you think "I need to be a woman" rather than just being comfortable being a somewhat effeminate man. To me having that thought when it wasn't really a concern of mine being well into my 30s now, as it apparently wasn't with you for a somewhat similarly long amount of time, is a little scary.

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Good luck.

In my experience mtf trans is a never ending battle where you have to be willing and committed to sacrifice literally every aspect of your life, constantly, just to get other people to see you as a woman -- and most of them still won't. Many of the ones who do will see it as an obligation or a favor, where they are going out of their way to treat you a certain way. And the moment you piss them off or disappoint them, they will not hesitate to drop the act.

I think someone has to have an incredible amount of willpower to subject themselves to that. It basically made me realize that whatever 'trans' is, I definitely don't qualify. Because to me it's not worth sacrificing that much over. I can certainly live comfortably as I am now.

Well, internally, I've pretty much thought of myself as a woman for the majority of my life. But other people rarely ever see me that way except in pretty specific circumstances. Like if I meet a new social group online and no one there knows who I am. If they've only seen me type, or only heard my voice. Well, 90% of them will still assume 'dude' because it's the internet but like 10% might actually think 'wait is that a girl???' I don't even think the internet has gotten particularly much better about this despite shifting demographics. Even in servers I've been in where people generally accepted me as female presenting, new users who joined would typically (and frequently) refer to me as 'dude' or' 'bro' as if to make a point that they didn't acknowledge it.

To me I can't muster the energy needed to present female, or try to convince people to treat me as one. I'm pretty openly non-binary but even my closest friends and family members still refer to me and treat me as a man. My grandmother was the only person who asked me about it, everyone else just ignored the concept and continued as usual.

I learned a long time ago to just accept that I can't change how other people will view me.

Imagine going through HRT, making the decision on whether or not to get bottom surgery, struggling with the fact that women's clothes won't actually fit you even if you think they are cute. Well, skirts and dresses are fine, but the top piece is not going to fit. It's not made for someone with broad shoulders. Dealing with everyone in your social circles viewing you differently. You can call them bigots and feel good about yourself for five minutes but then what? You're still alone, or things have changed.

Imagine constantly working to groom yourself so that your facial hair and body hair are kept under control. Learning to wear make up to conceal your more masculine features. Wearing it every single day. Dealing with your hairline. Figuring out how to wear a wig, how to make it look good. Realizing that wearing a wig is uncomfortable as hell. And after doing all of that, 90%+ of people will still treat you like a man. I dunno. Like I said, whatever 'trans' is, I'm obviously not that. I'm at least comfortable enough with my current life that I can't imagine engaging myself in that kind of unwinnable war of attrition.

Eh, well, like most people, you probably don't actually want to hear this. But I'm curious to know if you've really thought about it or if you just think that hatching out of a pokemon egg is a cute idea.


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what just happened

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Congrats friend!!!

(I also thought this was baby topic at first)

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Tom Bombadil posted...

I actually am not sure what to go by on the internet now, lol. A lot of the secret girl accounts I made use my real name, but I'm not sure that's a good idea now that I'll be linking them back to me more openly. Tombolo and Bolo are still fine I think! Tom I'm not sure about. I probably will kinda phase that out elsewhere, but it's been my name here for so long lol.

bolo

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Bolo played Chong Li which is a pretty similar name to Chun Li which everyone here would identify as female so it makes sense to me

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actually nah let's be a bit lighter

sorry your experience sucked, I can assure you that I would not be coming out if I had options

edit: went too light

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Maria, I'm sorry that was your experience, it's super shitty and I can relate in more ways than one. Please allow a newly minted trans person to just share her joy with the world for a moment, ok?

Tom Bombadil posted...

actually nah let's be a bit lighter

Why? You think you're capable of hurting my feelings or something?

Paratroopa1 posted...

Maria, I'm sorry that was your experience, it's super shitty and I can relate in more ways than one. Please allow a newly minted trans person to just share her joy with the world for a moment, ok?

You know how they teach us to treat people how we would like to be treated? Well, this is how I would like to be treated. I'd rather have someone share very relevant and very important information based on real first and second hand accounts, giving me the foresight and time to prepare for what comes next.

The way I do NOT want to be treated is to hear a meaningless "congratulations" from the same people who can, and will, turn on you later. That holds absolutely no value to me.

My words might seem more harsh but they in fact come from a place of genuine sympathy. I'm only a big meanie because I'm describing how the world actually works, and the world sucks. Especially if you're trans. This is not bullshit, I'm not trying to hurt or upset anyone. You can relate to what I'm saying because you also know it's true.

If she doesn't get it yet, she will later.

Everyone else is just meaningless white noise. "Congratulations." Sure.

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