Current Events > PSA - you DO NOT have an obligation to financially support your parents

(+) Yeah! (+)

DirkDiggles posted...

Yeah, I was thinking the same thing. no_u_l7 is in here parroting the TC pretty hard.

It's not me....all my alts are known and I have no reason to hide lmao

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No_U_L7 posted...

What about a lifetime of emotional abuse

I sorry you had to go through that.

Gives hug

Dad: "I gave you life, kept you fed and warm for 18 years. You owe me your life. The least you can do is pay my bills and buy me a car. Plus, if you don't I'll just kill your dog, it's not like she matters to me."

Yes, he actually says these things. He also goes crazy if he doesn't get what he wants.
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darkphoenix181 posted...

I sorry you had to go through that.

Gives hug

"Had"...I'm still going thru it lol

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Kolibri X posted...

I mean, if you don't love your parents, sure.

This
anything else is just cover
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ThyCorndog posted...

This
anything else is just cover

I dont get this binary thinking. You can love someone and not want them in your life all the time

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your parents will not be happy in a senior home
if you care about their happiness then you can't ignore that
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konokonohamaru posted...

Imagine thinking what TC thinks and then also believing that children should be able to stay on their parents health insurance until age 26

LMAO

I never said that but thanks for projecting
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ThyCorndog posted...

your parents will not be happy in a senior home
if you care about their happiness then you can't ignore that

Again, that's binary thinking. I care enough that I don't want them to be homeless. I dont care enough that I'd let them move in with me

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No_U_L7 posted...

ThyCorndog posted...

your parents will not be happy in a senior home
if you care about their happiness then you can't ignore that

Again, that's binary thinking. I care enough that I don't want them to be homeless. I dont care enough that I'd let them move in with me

so are you gonna pay their rent for an apartment then?
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ThyCorndog posted...

so are you gonna buy them an apartment then?

They have a house. If they cant take care of themselves I'd put them in a nursing home, and use their money for it

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ThyCorndog posted...

your parents will not be happy in a senior home
if you care about their happiness then you can't ignore that

That may be true but that's literally not my problem either
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Damn u cold
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No_U_L7 posted...

ThyCorndog posted...

so are you gonna buy them an apartment then?

They have a house. If they cant take care of themselves I'd put them in a nursing home, and use their money for it

why did you bother to call it binary thinking if you picked one of the binary options?
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Kolibri X posted...

Damn u cold

I am what my parents made me. Reap what you sow, etc

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ThyCorndog posted...

why did you bother to call it binary thinking if you picked one of the binary options?

It's not "you care about your parents if you take care of them, you dont care about them if you put them in a nursing home". I can care about them and put them in a nursing home

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Faith in humanity nearing 0%
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Capitalism, HO!
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No_U_L7 posted...

ThyCorndog posted...

why did you bother to call it binary thinking if you picked one of the binary options?

It's not "you care about your parents if you take care of them, you dont care about them if you put them in a nursing home". I can care about them and put them in a nursing home

read your response to my post here

No_U_L7 posted...

ThyCorndog posted...

your parents will not be happy in a senior home
if you care about their happiness then you can't ignore that

Again, that's binary thinking. I care enough that I don't want them to be homeless. I dont care enough that I'd let them move in with me

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ThyCorndog posted...

read your response to my post here

Yes...that doesnt conflict at all and is consistent. What are you confused about?

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You have no legal obligation and I'd argue you have no moral obligation to do that. It's definitely nice, if possible and it doesn't set your own finances/physical/mental health back. People call it selfish. Sure. It's also less selfish than having a kid while reasoning out it's so they can take care of you when you're older.

Mistere Man posted...

Faith in humanity nearing 0%

You're projecting your relationship with your parents onto others. Assume you had abusive parents. Would you feel the same?

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No_U_L7 posted...

Mistere Man posted...

Faith in humanity nearing 0%

You're projecting your relationship with your parents onto others. Assume you had abusive parents. Would you feel the same?

This isnt about abusive parents which I could more understand, its the they didnt ask me first to be born thing.

Also I did have a highly abusive parent but I can forgive and still can and do take care of them.
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Leanaunfurled posted...

You have no legal obligation and I'd argue you have no moral obligation to do that. It's definitely nice, if possible and it doesn't set your own finances/physical/mental health back. People call it selfish. Sure. It's also less selfish than having a kid while reasoning out it's so they can take care of you when you're older.

Yeah, when my father-in-law died my mother-in-law lived with us for like a month or so, and it was the longest and worst month ever. >_> And she isn't like a stereotypical horrible mother-in-law, but it just totally throws your home into upheaval (especially if its a small-ish house) and was terrible for the mental well-being of my wife and I as well as our relationship with each other and with her mom.

Sometimes circumstances are what they are but if they are capable of providing for themselves financially and aren't physically incapable or whatever then I definitely am not letting my parents in. >_> But when MIL lived with us my parents were basically like, "wow thats terrible you shouldn't let her!" so I take that to mean they won't expect to move in unless absolutely 100% no other options.

I've seen other situations where a parent moves in and it just ruins the lives of their child's family.
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Conflict posted...

thanosibe posted...

Veggeta X posted...

Millennials hates their parents. More at 10.

This. I am so about tired of hearing people cry with this "I didn't ask to be born" bullshit. No wonder suicide jokes are funny to millennials too.

I mean, they didn't

You don't even have to hate your parents to understand that. I don't.

They had every chance not to be born as they as a sperm chose to be the one that fertilized the egg. If they didnt want to live they should have just hung back and waited to die like their millions of potential brothers and sisters.
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Mistere Man posted...

Also I did have a highly abusive parent but I can forgive and still can and do take care of them.

You're a kinder person than I am. That's not a compliment lol

I can forgive too, but I'm not letting them ruin my lifestyle

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No_U_L7 posted...

Mistere Man posted...

Also I did have a highly abusive parent but I can forgive and still can and do take care of them.

You're a kinder person than I am. That's not a compliment lol

I can forgive too, but I'm not letting them ruin my lifestyle

I understand everyone must walk their own path.
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JustMyOpinion posted...

I'd take my mom in if it were between that and her living on the streets, but I do understand I have no obligation. Parents are legally obligated to provide the necessities for their kids. I'd just feel like a scumbag when I have a spare bedroom in my house.

If it were homeless or move in with me they can move in with me.

But I'm going to get a 1 br just to avoid that conundrum lol

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No_U_L7 posted...

Mistere Man posted...

Also I did have a highly abusive parent but I can forgive and still can and do take care of them.

You're a kinder person than I am. That's not a compliment lol

I can forgive too, but I'm not letting them ruin my lifestyle

It sounds more like hes doing it for himself then in the end. I dont want to feel guilty about it so I'll do the right thing in order to not have to feel bad afterwards
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DBZFlGHTEH posted...

It sounds more like hes doing it for himself then in the end. I dont want to feel guilty about it so I'll do the right thing in order to not have to feel bad afterwards

I dont have much feelings lol. As long as they aren't being abused or on the street I'm fine

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DBZFlGHTEH posted...

No_U_L7 posted...

Mistere Man posted...

Also I did have a highly abusive parent but I can forgive and still can and do take care of them.

You're a kinder person than I am. That's not a compliment lol

I can forgive too, but I'm not letting them ruin my lifestyle

It sounds more like hes doing it for himself then in the end. I dont want to feel guilty about it so I'll do the right thing in order to not have to feel bad afterwards

Nah I just like to help family even if they hate me or wish I had never been born which some of them did/do.
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When I was a kid I had no problem helping my mom with bills when she needed it. But over the years after each "emergency" she's suddenly buy a bunch of new shit she doesn't need, then the next month it's another "emergency" that she needs more money for, non stop every month.

Was easier to just cut her out of my life and allow myself to be financially independent without her constantly leeching off me. If I hadn't I'd have no savings and nothing to fall back on if I had a real emergency because she sure as shit wouldn't be able to help.

DBZFlGHTEH posted...

LinkPizza posted...

DBZFlGHTEH posted...

BuckVanHammer posted...

what your parents do to you bud? come on, let it out.

Nothing really but I'm sure as hell not fucking up my home life for 20 years cause they wanna mooch

How does helping them fuck up your home life?

Oh so you wanna move in and just watch price is right al day for 15 years while doing nothing and complaining about everything. Why would I bother even owning a house I'll just sell it and get a 1 bedroom apartment then

That sounds like a personal problem. If my parents moved it, they dont act like that. And Id let them. Theyd probably do their best to help out around the house and stuff. She does that when she comes over to visit from out of state already. Im not trying to be rude, but is it that your parent are not the best?

DBZFlGHTEH posted...

I did say if something like illness happened then that's a different story and I see no problem there.

If they just wanna mooch for a decade cause they blew retirement money at the casino then hell no

Again, sounds like a personal problem. Just because your parents (or someone you know) blew all their money at a casino doesnt mean everyones parents did. Sometimes, people just need help...
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You absolutely do have an obligation. Whether or not you pursue that obligation is up to you, though.

DBZFlGHTEH posted...

It is absolutely NOT your responsibility to take them in, it's your choice.

Responsibility and obligation aren't the same thing. And, unless it's a legal responsibility, you can just shirk it.

However, if your parents (or sibling) are living on the street when you can reasonably accommodate them at your home, you're kinda being shitty.
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No_U_L7 posted...

ThyCorndog posted...

your parents will not be happy in a senior home
if you care about their happiness then you can't ignore that

Again, that's binary thinking. I care enough that I don't want them to be homeless. I dont care enough that I'd let them move in with me

You dont have to move them in. Maybe find them a cheap place close by or something...
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No_U_L7 posted...

ThyCorndog posted...

why did you bother to call it binary thinking if you picked one of the binary options?

It's not "you care about your parents if you take care of them, you dont care about them if you put them in a nursing home". I can care about them and put them in a nursing home

This sounds like you dont care about them. You dont want them to die on the streets, but can care less if they are sad and miserable, and you rather not be bothered with them ever... At least, thats what it sounds like...
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LinkPizza posted...

You dont have to move them in. Maybe find them a cheap place close by or something...

A cheap place with their money, sure. But in home care is expensive. They can't afford it, might as well go nursing home

LinkPizza posted...

This sounds like you dont care about them. You dont want them to die on the streets, but can care less if they are sad and miserable, and you rather not be bothered with them ever... At least, thats what it sounds like...

They are miserable people by nature regardless. I'll visit them in the nursing home. What more do you want from me

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Also, why do people always say they didnt ask to be born? You would have to be born first for them to ask you. Duh!

Or should we just end the human race since nobody is asking to be born? Or abort all children since none of them asked to be born?

How do we know that we arent souls awaiting a body and when someones being born, a soul will volunteer to go?
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LinkPizza posted...

Also, why do people always say they didnt ask to be born? You would have to be born first for them to ask you. Duh!

Or should we just end the human race since nobody is asking to be born? Or abort all children since none of them asked to be born?

How do we know that we arent souls awaiting a body and when someones being born, a soul will volunteer to go?

Because souls aren't a real thing

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No_U_L7 posted...

A cheap place with their money, sure. But in home care is expensive. They can't afford it, might as well go nursing home

Nobody said you have to pay for it. Help them find a cheap place that they can afford...

No_U_L7 posted...

They are miserable people by nature regardless. I'll visit them in the nursing home. What more do you want from me

Ah. So it is personal. Not everyone is miserable like your parents. Some have loving parents. Who actually try to help their children have better lives instead of trying to make them miserable, as well...
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No_U_L7 posted...

LinkPizza posted...

Also, why do people always say they didnt ask to be born? You would have to be born first for them to ask you. Duh!

Or should we just end the human race since nobody is asking to be born? Or abort all children since none of them asked to be born?

How do we know that we arent souls awaiting a body and when someones being born, a soul will volunteer to go?

Because souls aren't a real thing

You have proof?
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LinkPizza posted...

Nobody said you have to pay for it. Help them find a cheap place that they can afford...

Ah. So it is personal. Not everyone is miserable like your parents. Some have loving parents. Who actually try to help their children have better lives instead of trying to make them miserable, as well...

I'm not telling people not to take care of their parents, just offering perspective on why some wouldnt want their parents moving in with them

LinkPizza posted...

You have proof?

That's not how proof works, you can only prove a positive, you cant prove a negative. It's impossible to do. And that's how it works in a court of law, hence innocent until proven guilty. So the question is, can you prove that souls do exist?

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Eh.

I mostly agree but it's a more complicated issue than this.

No obligation, sure, but if they need it, it's kind of cold to turn them down. Of course, it's more complicated than that too. We didn't take care of Mrs. DevsBro's mom at her end of life because she was a monster and we couldn't risk our marriage. Like I said, it was cold, but at the end of the day, she would be dead now either way and our marriage is way better off than if we had tried to live with bitchzilla.
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I actually do in my state if they run up a bill at a facility for the elderly in my state. If their estate can't pay the bill then they come after me.
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Despite my success my parents have never invested in me, and they could have but chose not to. They refused to support me at all in college despite me choosing the cheapest education route. Literally would not buy me textbooks, and it was all they had to pay for. Meanwhile both of my loser sisters were treated to new eaves every week.

They're acting really warm now and want to be all in my face and part of my life. They'll get out of me what they put in, luckily i have 4 siblings they can try and get to care for them, although only my older brother is capable.

They also talked me into giving them my savings to get a new house, which they failed to get. My mom put bills, phones and credit cards in all of our names ruining our credit to start life.

I will never, ever help or support them and have told them as much.
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Joeydollaz posted...

You wouldn't even be on this Earth, you need to take care of them UNTIL LAST SECONDS

money comes and goes fool, ask them they know more they spend it raising you.

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you pretty much have no obligation to do anything you don't want to do under this frame work

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No_U_L7 posted...

LinkPizza posted...

Nobody said you have to pay for it. Help them find a cheap place that they can afford...

Ah. So it is personal. Not everyone is miserable like your parents. Some have loving parents. Who actually try to help their children have better lives instead of trying to make them miserable, as well...

I'm not telling people not to take care of their parents, just offering perspective on why some wouldnt want their parents moving in with them

Thats fine. But the way you were speaking made it sound like you were telling others basically not to. And making it sound like everyone who needed help blew all their money at the casino. Or every old person was financially irresponsible...

No_U_L7 posted...

LinkPizza posted...

You have proof?

That's not how proof works, you can only prove a positive, you cant prove a negative. It's impossible to do. And that's how it works in a court of law, hence innocent until proven guilty. So the question is, can you prove that souls do exist?

Nope. I cant. Thats why I said maybe. You said they dont exist like you oh know and you have proof. I offered a theory, while you tried to state a fact. To state a fact like you did, you need proof. Thats how proof works. Were not talking about law or anything. You dont have proof because no one does. We cant really prove one way or another while still alive. You cant state a fact like souls dont exist and just assume youre correct. I mean, you can. But you may not be right...
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