Lurker > Alex1976

"Weird Al" Yankovic.

I like all his albums, but I had to pick one, I'd go with Mandatory Fun.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

15,046 days.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Dark Helmet
Darth Vader
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Toss-up between Happy Gilmore and Bobby Boucher.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Captain Steven Hiller in Independence Day.

"Oh no, you did NOT shoot that green shit at me."
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Genie from Aladdin.

Honorable mentions for:

Adrian Cronauer in Good Morning Vietnam
Peter Banning in Hook
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Had 3 removed, fourth one never formed.

It was done in 2 separate procedures - the two on my right side were removed 3 days before my 21st birthday, the other one (top left) was removed about 1.5 years later. In both cases, I opted for complete KO.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

I'm paying off a mortgage on mine.

Don't know the square footage, but mine is a 3 bedroom, 1.5 bath with attached garage. Bought it from my parents in December 2004, mortgage will be paid off by late 2019 (definitely earlier than December because I put some money towards the principal from time to time). My monthly payment is in the neighborhood of $870 a month.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Male Voice 1 - Saints Row the Third & Saints Row 4
Simon Blackquill - Ace Attorney: Dual Destinies (uncredited)
Booker DeWitt - Bioshock Infinite
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

John McClane, easily.

Honorable mentions for:

Korben Dallas in The Fifth Element
Voice of the baby in Look Who's Talking
Butch Coolidge in Pulp Fiction.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

I'd have to go with Maverick in Top Gun.

Honorable mentions would be Steve Randle in The Outsiders and Lt. Kaffee in A Few Good Men.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Offworlder1 posted...

I am 100% proud I did not vote for Hillary Clinton, people can complain about Trump all they want, with Hillary the SJWs and crazy rioters wanted her in power. Imagine how things would be with SJWs, PC culture, and BLM having someone in power that caters to them.

This, by a lot.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Despicable Me 3.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Sad news - one of my parents' cats, named Silky, was put down this morning.

He was getting up there in the years and had this strange growth (started in his nasal cavity, then it spread) that was causing him terrible pain. Not only that, but his appetite was mostly gone and he was mostly fur and bones when I saw him yesterday.

I'm gonna miss that lovable old lug something fierce - I'll always remember his loud purring, his tendency to lick your face when his purrbox was running, and his fluffy white fur.

I had nicknames for him - I called him Silkers, Senor Pink Belly, and the Great White Nyan.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Dark Helmet
Chong Li
The Shark
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

I have vague memories of the first two places I lived - but my memories become a lot more focused around the time I turned 3 and I was living in San Pedro, California. I remember gopher holes in the backyard, a big hill behind the house, and lots of snails.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

The one closest to where I live is now a Cash America pawn shop.

Others either just lie empty or something else has taken its place (don't know what and frankly IDGAF).
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Forrest Gump was the first to come to mind, then I also thought of him as Paul Edgecombe in The Green Mile.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

I've had coworkers and supervisors piss me off from time to time, but not enough to make me hand in a resignation.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Dark Helmet
Lord Voldemort
Judge Doom
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Jags have been a fucking joke for years, so yeah, your team is better than mine.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Local sandwich shop (called Blue Boys Sandwich Shop) - soon as the waitstaff see me, they know what I want.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Never.

Ever since I signed up, I've followed the TOU.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

2 siblings. 1 brother, 1 sister.

Brother is 8 years younger than me.

Cancer claimed my sister at the age of 10 back in 1985.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

My mom collected them, but I'm not sure if she bothered with caring about which mint (Philly or Denver) it came from.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Weird Al Yankovic.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

75%
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Nope.

They buy it or stream it...IDGAF.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

A few times at my parents' swimming pool in Lake City.

If I had my swim trunks with me when I went to Orlando last week, I probably would have gone for a swim at the pool at my hotel.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

I've known it by memory for a little more than 30 years - it was read at my sister's funeral (cancer took her at the age of 10 back in 1985) and it stuck with me.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Sorry about your loss, Rial. Stay strong, man.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

I work as a retail associate for USPS.

1. At least a few times each day, I'm not even halfway through ringing up the postage and/or the overall sale and they've already gotten their debit/credit card out. They're swiping like crazy and wondering why no beeping or anything. If not that, they fail to see the slip sticking out the chip reader that CLEARLY says "SWIPE CARD - CHIP READER COMING SOON" and try jamming their card in.

2. When I'm done with my current customer and the next person in line is either engrossed in a conversation or using their phone, I call out "I can help the next one in line" - I swear to God that person has gone deaf.

3. I've had customers recoil when I tell them how much it costs to send something (whether Priority Express, Priority, First Class, or Retail Ground (used to be Parcel Post)). Had some of those start spouting "I SPENT LESS BUYING THIS THING, PRICE TO SEND IT IS RIDICULOUS, I'M GOING TO UPS!" When that happens, I mutter under my breath, "Good luck, bub - UPS costs even more".

4. Closing time is clearly on the outside - doors are closed by then. More often than not, some dumbass comes knocking on the door to the retail area, wanting us to send their package although we are closed and we're dealing with the last ones who came in before the doors closed. You snooze, you lose.

I've had/heard of some real doozies ever since I started my current position a little more than 2 years ago.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Sorry to hear about that - what happened...damn, that's horrible.

Hoping for the best.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

3 days after my 21st birthday.

Still remember my girlfriend laughing at the faces I was making. Beer made me gag, and I was barely able to drink wine without choking.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

2012 Honda CR-V
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

About half an hour on average. Depends on traffic on I-295 and timing of traffic lights.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Middle class, mostly.

Despite having to move every so often early in life (Dad was in the Navy), it provided enough for food, clothes, and a place to live.

Things got tough around the mid-80's - my sister died (cancer), my Dad left the Navy (heard conflicting stories regarding that - don't know what to believe), and Mom had to get a job just to make ends meet while Dad pursued a regular position with the U.S. Postal Service (he had a job at Publix Supermarkets, which was basically a stepping stone for him). During then, I remember having Hamburger Helper every so often and not eating out a lot.

Things looked up when Dad got his job with USPS - we were able to afford luxuries a bit more often.

Me on my own now...I'm managing to get by with my job, I'm saving for retirement, have a car of my own, and my mortgage is nearly paid off.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Pulp Fiction, easily.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

This morning, my cat Squeak attempted to wake me around 7 AM (I'm usually up around 6:45, mainly because of work) - after getting no response from me after she stuck her wet nose in my face, she curled up at the foot of my bed.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

I'm honest most of the time, but can get away with lying every once in a while.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Retail associate/distribution clerk with USPS.

Work pisses me off at times, but it pays well and it beats the hell out of what my parents wanted me to do for a living.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

FF6 for me, with 4 running a close second.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

I've worn glasses since I was 9 - I'm nearsighted.

My parents suspected it as far back as when I was 5. Apparently, I couldn't see airplanes in the sky, but I sure as hell could see the Goodyear blimp flying overhead.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Nope. Don't intend to start either.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Went to my 10-year reunion back in 2004 and enjoyed myself.

I didn't hear a thing about a 20-year reunion (supposed to have happened in 2014) - either it wasn't arranged, or it involved having to be on Facebook or some other social media to find out (which I can't be bothered with anyway).

If (and ONLY IF) there's a 25 year reunion (in 2019), I haven't heard a thing yet.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

It's packed away somewhere, probably the attic.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

Still around after 15 years (registered in 2002).

Work, paying off mortgage, stuff like that.
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.

"Ah-ah. I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, 'did he fire six shots or only five'? Well, to tell you the truth, I kinda lost track myself. But being this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you gotta ask yourself a question - do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?"
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When ancient man screamed and beat on the ground with sticks, they called it WITCHCRAFT.
When modern man does the same thing, they call it GOLF.