Poll of the Day > How long did/do you think you'll date before getting engaged?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Girlfriends friend just got engaged after a year of knowing someone, made me wonder.

I was engaged after a year and a month.

I am no longer engaged.

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lol as if

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Was almost engaged to my Son's Mother over 20 years ago...

Haven't met anyone (maybe one chick) worth considering since.

I am engaged

Was 3 years

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Clench281 posted...

I am engaged

Was 3 years

I have never heard you mention your fianc. Being young and in academics I sorta thought you were single. Congratulations.

I don't care for marriage so hypothetically if I ever meet someone to settle down with I don't see myself pushing for it.

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My gf and I plan to get engaged in about two years. At that time well have been together almost 5 years.

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i feel the metric to go by is 3-5 years before marriage, help to feel out the issues early, ok?

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It's a non linear scale that decreases with age.

If you're 18, the number of dating years before engagement being a good idea is about 6 (so, nearly unheard of).

If you're 30, the number of years is about 3.

If you're 40, it's about 1 year.

After 50, honestly who cares anymore.

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I'm not sure marriage is even something I want.

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I won't be getting engaged because I've never dated and still don't want to. I don't want to get married.

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Ive been in my relationship for a bunch of years now. Maybe like 5 or 6 years or so. AFAIK, we dont have plans to get married...
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Never, ever ever ever.

I will never get married.

I would never date someone for a few months then marry them. Buddy of mine met a girl dated her for like 8 months proclaimed she's the one married her and shy of a year of being married, they were divorcing.

He later told me he thought he knew her! Really dude!

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i don't think there's any magic number but i do think you should probably be living together for some time before you consider getting married

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It was about a year, 1968-1969

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We are dating indefinitely. I don't need to bring lawyers into my love life.

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I've been with the same person for more than 20 years and we're not engaged or married, so I'm just going to go ahead and project that forward until the heat death of the universe.
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blu posted...

I have never heard you mention your fianc. Being young and in academics I sorta thought you were single. Congratulations.

Thanks. If only the pandemic hadn't postponed the wedding, I'd be a married man!

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not interested in marriage.

aside from things like tax benefits, i don't see any reason to. if you are going to stay together, being married won't really change that.
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Clench281 posted...

Thanks. If only the pandemic hadn't postponed the wedding, I'd be a married man!

my brother hasn't decided to postpone his, but instead make it a very small ceremony
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Until the US overhauls its divorce laws, I'm not sure I'd ever get married... well, unless I stood to gain substantially especailly since it lessens the potential damage from a divorce. Otherwise it's not like marriage confers that many advantages anyway.

blu posted...

Girlfriends friend just got engaged after a year of knowing someone, made me wonder.

A year is a more than reasonable length of time. I think my brother got engaged with 6 months of meeting his wife.

Plus becoming engaged doesn't necessarily mean much because the wedding could be in the distant future. There are engagements that last years.

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Long distance for 4 months before meeting each other. Then another 7 months apart while waiting for paperwork to go through, then 2 months and we got hitched

13 months. 15 years later... still together :D

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Krazy_Kirby posted...

my brother hasn't decided to postpone his, but instead make it a very small ceremony

Not even by my choice. The court cancelled our appointment to get it done (legally).

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I want to say two years? We were married in 2010. I think we started dating in January 2007 and got engaged in September 2009. So closer to 2 1/2 years.

We were hiking around Crater Lake when I proposed. I wrote a poem and was so nervous that I stuttered my way through it lol

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For me it depends...

For example, how often do you go on dates, see this person, or even just talk/message this person?
You could be dating 5 years, but only see them once a week or less.
Or you could be dating 2 years, and see them three times a week or more.
However, in both of these examples you have yet to live with the person in question.

Now what if you dated someone for 1 year, but you lived with that person for most of that year
How does that compare with the other two examples?
There are other possible factors too though, such as how long you knew someone before dating them.

But you know what? Everything I just said doesn't matter when there are people who get engaged one month after knowing each other and they end up in a life-long relationship...

We dated on and off for 5 years before we married.

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Im at 2.5 years and dont feel anywhere near ready.

The extra 10-15k back in tax benefits would be really nice, but Im content to otherwise not be married, at least in current relationship.

I've been with my boyfriend for almost 6 years and I don't think we'll ever get married

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I was engaged at 24, had been in a relationship with her since 21. By 25 we had broken up, never went through with the marriage. Really glad we didn't too. I'm adamantly against marriage these days based on all the horror stories I've heard from friends and relatives about their divorces and custody battles.

My wife and I dated for 3 months before getting engaged, then got married a year and a half later

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Jen0125 posted...

I've been with my boyfriend for almost 6 years and I don't think we'll ever get married

Why not?

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CarefreeDude posted...

My wife and I dated for 3 months before getting engaged, then got married a year and a half later

Good luck duder. The only person I know who'd gone that fast just got out of a truly nasty divorce.

DDirtyDastard posted...

Good luck duder. The only person I know who'd gone that fast just got out of a truly nasty divorce.

My friend's parents married after knowing each other two weeks and they've been married like 40+ years

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DDirtyDastard posted...

Good luck duder. The only person I know who'd gone that fast just got out of a truly nasty divorce.

I mean we've been happily married for 6 years now and have children, things seem to be going well

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CarefreeDude posted...

I mean we've been happily married for 6 years now and have children, things seem to be going well

Righteous bro. You're one of the lucky ones.

I also agree that in general people who get engaged/married too fast end up crashing and burning hard. There was just something special about my wife when I met her and we fell for each other very hard. She was unlike any woman I've ever known and ive known a lot of women

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If I recall though redwingsbabe judged me super hard though


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CarefreeDude posted...

and ive known a lot of women

(

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Zeus posted...

A year is a more than reasonable length of time. I think my brother got engaged with 6 months of meeting his wife.

You think? Seems soon to me. Unless you known each other before dating I don't think a year is long enough to decide to spend the erst of your life with someone. 6 months certainly isn't. I guess at the end of the day folk do what works for them though.

Plus becoming engaged doesn't necessarily mean much because the wedding could be in the distant future. There are engagements that last years.

I never understood the point in long engagements.

Far-Queue posted...

My friend's parents married after knowing each other two weeks and they've been married like 40+ years

That's impressive. Been together 40 years is really good.

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wwinterj25 posted...

You think? Seems soon to me. Unless you known each other before dating I don't think a year is long enough to decide to spend the erst of your life with someone. 6 months certainly isn't. I guess at the end of the day folk do what works for them though.

6 months is a bit on the faster side, but honestly what's 2 or 3 years going to tell you that 1 year can't? There's a pretty clear point of diminishing returns.

And I have an uncle who wanted to propose to my aunt within a week of first dating her (I think they married after college) and they've been married forever now. For the life of me, I don't know what he sees in her, but somehow that relationship has worked. Probably because he puts in the effort.

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Zeus posted...

what's 2 or 3 years going to tell you that 1 year can't?

...lol

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CarefreeDude posted...

Why not?

Idk he doesn't seem into the idea of marriage and it's not a necessity for me

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My grandparents married in two weeks while they were in their young 20's. Met on a bus tour, grandpa's current gf was pregnant at the time and he left her for my grandma. Still together like 60 years later.

DirtBasedSoap posted...

...lol

Yeah, I agree. I don't think diminishing returns kicks in that hard until after 3+ years. After 1 year that still seems like a fresh relationship to me.

Zeus posted...

6 months is a bit on the faster side, but honestly what's 2 or 3 years going to tell you that 1 year can't?

I'd assume more about the person you're dating but maybe I'm just crazy. If you think you know someone after a year that would explain why many get a divorce. Maybe this is my trust issues though.

And I have an uncle who wanted to propose to my aunt within a week of first dating her (I think they married after college) and they've been married forever now.

You certainly don't know someone after a week period. Still it's always nice to hear these odd decisions work out.

Jen0125 posted...

Idk he doesn't seem into the idea of marriage and it's not a necessity for me

Reminds me of my sister and her bf. They have been together around 12 years or so at this point. Have three beautiful kids and live together but have never bothered with marriage. She isn't against the idea but doesn't see the point and he doesn't seem that bothered too.

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Shortest time from first date to wedding: two and a half years.
Longest time from first date to wedding: three and a half years.

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Around 4 months, its totally different for every relationship

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5 Years dating - we moved in together after 1 year. Proposed after 5 - married within 5 months of proposing.