Poll of the Day > Does a lesbian being aroused by men automatically mean she's bi?

(+) Yeah! (+)

For those who don't know, I'm a lesbian.

I've been discussion about lesbianism with my friends and they're convinced that I'm bi because I'm aroused by men and I like dicks.

The thing is, while I do find men to be appealing, they don't do anything else for me. Being around a woman I like soothes my soul, she makes me feel like everything is going to be okay and makes me feel like I'm going to be okay.

A man doesn't evoke that kind of reaction.

shut the fuck up dude
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You're bisexual and homoromantic. This just means that you're sexually aroused by men and women, but you have romantic feelings only for other women.
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Sniffin' a spliff of spiff makes you nipple-hard, it's not your fault... it's purely chemical
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This is something my SO and I wrestle with in our own relationship. I present stereotypically male, but don't really identify as such - I don't really have a gender identity at all as far as I'm concerned. My SO considers herself "gay" to differentiate herself from political lesbianism, and has no interest in guys. She doesn't really consider me a guy either, so she's only bi to the extent that I don't present stereotypically feminine.

What you're describing though, sounds a little closer to genuine bisexuality. You're aroused by men, but I presume do not connect with them on a romantic level, and maybe not even sexually if it involves real-world skin contact. This is where the Kinsey Scale is useful.

dainkinkaide posted...

You're bisexual and homoromantic.

I think even that loses some of the nuance needed. To me, bisexuality is more or less equal arousal to men and women. She might be predominately homosexual, and completely homoromantic.
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edededdy posted...

shut the fuck up dude

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Sounds like you get a lot of attention with this mindset.

those words are just labels
it's just a spectrum
sex doesn't mean everything
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Kungfu Kenobi posted...

This is something my SO and I wrestle with in our own relationship. I present stereotypically male, but don't really identify as such - I don't really have a gender identity at all as far as I'm concerned. My SO considers herself "gay" to differentiate herself from political lesbianism, and has no interest in guys. She doesn't really consider me a guy either, so she's only bi to the extent that I don't present stereotypically feminine.

What you're describing though, sounds a little closer to genuine bisexuality. You're aroused by men, but I presume do not connect with them on a romantic level, and maybe not even sexually if it involves real-world skin contact. This is where the Kinsey Scale is useful.

It's almost like sexuality and gender identity are fluid and trying to label yourself is pointless or something.
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VioletZer0 posted...

Does a lesbian being aroused by men automatically mean she's bi?

Not really no. If they act on it then sure but you can find anyone attractive and indeed be turned on by it without actually being sexually attracted to said person/thing. For example I find the abdomen area a turn on. Both guys and girls have these so I find it attractive in both sexes. This doesn't mean I'd want to do anything sexual with a guy. It just means some have things that I find attractive.
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ugh
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I'm straight and I have been aroused by Arnold Schwarzenegger's butt in The Terminator.
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Bi-curious at the very least, sure.
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i still can't decide if i like this gimmick or not.
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arousal is a physiological response and doesn't specifically elicit desire.
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