Board 8 > All-Purpose Wrestling Topic 184: Huge return

(+) Yeah! (+)

There's a joke somewhere in there about a Black Russian

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Trying to come up with an example of a monster push with no video packages

First person that came to mind was GUNNER SCOTT

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Who was the wrestler(s?) who debuted on Smackdown around the same time as Scotty Goldman just to job in his first match and continue jobbing until he was released?

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Kizarny?

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IIRC Kizarny still won matches

I'm thinking about someone totally generic

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Kizarny won exactly one match (I remember he had some convoluted finisher), then lost in a battle royale, then was never seen again

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Kizarny's record was 1-0 IIRC, beating losing streak MVP and then doing nothing aside from appearing as a backstage peanut gallery/in battle royals.

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DeathChicken'd

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Ryan Braddock

there we go

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Did any of the ECW guys have video packages?

I don't remember any for Swagger, although it was a while back

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No, because all those people were brought in under the NEW TALENT INITIATIVE.

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I thought Kevin Thorn had video packages. Man I miss Kevin Thorn. Almost wish I watched ECW more than sporadically back then.

Mordecai was better but Mordecai didn't have Ariel so it's a push.

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I only really got into WWECW when the show was revolving around Christian vs Regal/Zeke/Kozlov

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I don't remember Thorn having video packages, but Ariel did. She read tarot cards vaguely going on about how everyone was doomed when Thorn showed up

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WWE for once AHEAD of the trends as far as sexy vampires go.

Counting the Brood, they were ahead of that trend TWICE

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So I watched NXT.

It was pretty fantastic. Kidd and McGillicutty was great, and it kind of makes me wish McGillicutty got a push. He's... actually entertaining. He still needs a name that isn't terrible though. Kidd's new submission was sick though.

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Something just clicked in my head...

...Biscuit, are you Ignatius?

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I wish I was great enough to be Damien Sandow's personal scribe. :(

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So I just read that the buyrate for WM28 only ended up being 1.1 million.

So much for that 1.9 million predicted earlier!

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Oh. Shame. Still a decent buyrate.

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To it's credit, it's still better than last year AND the second highest of all time behind WM23.

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FCW - August 21, 2011

So it's another broken edition of FCW!

Leo Kruger talks about how he wants an FCW banner too (because all former Florida Heavyweight Champs have one up in the arena). I don't get to see this, but I'm sure it's "alright".

But I do get to see a Florida Tag Team Title match between Calvin Raines & Big E. Langston (c) vs Donny Marlow and CJ Parker. You'll know Donny Marlow as Camacho. Along with riding a ridiculous bike, he can also wrestle. WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT!? CJ Parker is just an annoying looking scrub.



See? Annoying. Even Regal thinks so. "He seems like one of those fellows who would look better with a broken nose, and I'd be happy to give it to him." lol I love this man. Donny Marlow's thing is that this is his twelfth time trying to win the tag titles with his twelfth partner (I may be exaggerating this number only slightly) but he's never won. The heels basically control CJ Parker for most of the match in suuuuch a boring way. Eventually CJ gets the hot tag and Donny Marlow comes out on fire! CJ Parker dropkicks Langston when he gets involved, and then the ref makes Parker go to the apron again. Langston then proceeds to just run over and knock his ass to the floor. I lol'd for some reason. Then a Samoan Drop puts Big E. Langston down. A backslide pin (which is like FCW's most popular finish) ends up keeping Calvin Raines down! NEW TAG CHAMPS! THIS IS UNIMPRESSIVE BECAUSE CJ PARKER LITERALLY DID NOTHING BUT GET HIS ASS KICKED, SO DONNY MARLOW EFFECTIVELY WON THIS BY HIMSELF, WHICH MEANS ALL OF HIS CRAPPY PARTNERS IN THE PAST WERE MEANINGLESS YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! Donny Marlow runs around the ring looking excited while Calvin Raines runs around the ring yelling in anger. I laughed when I realized Calvin Raines wasn't CJ Parker because he looked so silly.

And then I miss a segment where Briley Pierce (Lil' Ziggler) has a segment called "On The Box" where he talks about what is going on in FCW. Since it was Briley Pierce, I'm sure it was baaaaaaad.

Next up is James Bronson w/ Byron Saxton vs Leakee(EEEEEEEEEEEEE). I should stop doing the Leakee(EEEEEE) thing since it seems like Leakee has stopped doing that annoying thing where he just yells his name constantly. Bronson comes out in a sleeveless hoodie with the hood covering his head. Not a bad style choice, as it makes him stand out a bit. Regal gets a call in the middle of this match and leaves. Leakee watches Regal leave and Bronson takes advantage by smacking around Leakee. Then Byron Saxton gets back on commentary! OMG YAY! WWE'S BEST ANNOUNCER IS BACK ON COMMENTARY! Ahahaha he's talking up James Bronson and telling off Matt Martlaro for not praising him enough. Bronson locks in a headlock and starts clubbing Leakee in the face.

Matt: I think you're being a bit paranoid that everyone is out to get you.
Byron: You think I'm being paranoid? I'm in a SLING!

This guy. Leakee wins it shortly after with the weakest jumping forearm I've ever seen. Byron just kind of watches with an impish grin on his face and refuses to say anything, despite Matt wanting him to.

I miss a segment where Dean Ambrose talks about how Seth Rollins is a shame to the 15 Championship and how the title is meaningless now because of him. Seth Rollins goes after Dean Ambrose, but Ambrose ends up getting the upperhand.

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Next up, I get to see some dude called Mac Hetfield vs a guy who we all know and love... Kevin Hackman! No, I know you know him. But you probably know him better as... SIIIIIIILENT RAAAAAAAAAAAGE! Of course, Byron Saxton is only excited for Mac Hetfield's debut! OMG KEVIN HACKMAN'S THEME IS THE "BORN A CHAMPIOOOON" SONG FROM TOUGH ENOUGH! Ahahahaha. Mac Hetfield gives no s*** about Silent Rage and tells everyone that nobody cares about Kevin Hackman and that he doesn't care what he's done, and that he'll beat him. Kevin Hackman is the most unappealing big man I've ever seen. On each and every level. Holy crap, is he boring. Mac Hetfield seems more green simply because he didn't cover Hackman right, so the referee had to remind him how to do it right. Then Mac Hetfield gets up, taunts, runs to the ropes, and then runs into a god awful big boot from Silent Rage. lmao This wins him the match. AND HE WAS BORN A CHAMPIOOOOON!

And the main event is a Florida Heavyweight Championship match between Bo Rotundo (c) vs Leo Kruger. The best part of this match is Byron Saxton on the Leo Kruger HYPE train! This show is like, ten times better with Byron Saxton on commentary, and I'm not even kidding. He's that damn good. Oh! I guess there's a match too. It's pretty good. Leo Kruger seems like he's improved a bit, but I still don't care for him. I guess he just doesn't really interest me. Leo Kruger locks on a rear naked choke as Bo is in the ropes. The referee demands he lets go of Bo, but Leo refuses and chokes out Bo. The referee throws the match and Norman Smiley comes in and demands that Leo release the hold. Eventually, Kruger does... only for him to choke the f*** out of Norman Smiley. Hey, I think Leo Kruger could grow on me. That was pretty badass. He lets go of Norman when Maxine comes out and threatens to suspend him.

Highlight:

Mac Hetfield vs Silent Rage:

Bo Rotundo vs Leo Kruger for the Florida Heavyweight Championship:

First, everyone should see how terrible and boring Silent Rage is and why he should not have won Tough Enough. Second, Bo Rotundo and Leo Kruger had a very good match. And everybody should listen to more Byron Saxton commentary!

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From: TheRock1525 | #320
So I just read that the buyrate for WM28 only ended up being 1.1 million.

So much for that 1.9 million predicted earlier!

Yeah, there was a theory out there that the reporter who leaked it misheard 1.09 million.

I guess it's confirmed!

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Jakyl25 posted...
WWE for once AHEAD of the trends as far as sexy vampires go.

Counting the Brood, they were ahead of that trend TWICE

You're giving WWE too much credit. They weren't ahead on the Twilight trend, they were way behind on the Interview With A Vampire trend.

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also, didnt they release Shelly BEFORE Twilight took off?

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Yeah. We'll get a sexy vampire gimmick in about five years.

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I also thought that was all Heyman's idea, trying to capitalize on bite clubs or something

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From: SmartMuffin | #327
also, didnt they release Shelly BEFORE Twilight took off?

Yeah, hence being ahead of the trend.

Like, to the point where they killed it off before the trend actually started.

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From: DeathChicken | #329
I also thought that was all Heyman's idea

I buy this.

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It would also explain why they fired Shelly and changed Thorn into a generic nobody as soon as Heyman was gone

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From: DeathChicken | #329
bite clubs

Those were (are?) real things?

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CHARLOTTE

JONATHAN

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And I guess with Rock and Lesnar coming back, we've reached the point now where "WWE finally latches on to trends that were cool 10 years ago" means they're actually now a decade behind their OWN trends. <_<

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From: Jakyl25 | #333
Those were (are?) real things?

I feel like most teenage crazes covered by the media, they were probably real, just completely over-exaggerated in their prevalence/popularity.

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Except both are still pretty cool. Brock was huge in MMA and Rock's been in a bunch of blockbusters lately.

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GTM posted...
CHARLOTTE

JONATHAN



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Dr_Football posted...
Did any of the ECW guys have video packages?

I don't remember any for Swagger, although it was a while back


Kofi Kingston

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...

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Dean Ambrose @TheDeanAmbrose
I wonder if Mick would be so happy sitting on his high horse if it was his kids in wheelchairs.


oh snap

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Jakyl25 posted...
Dean Ambrose @TheDeanAmbrose
I wonder if Mick would be so happy sitting on his high horse if it was his kids in wheelchairs.


oh snap

lol NXT

Titus thinks hes Sonjay Dutt

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SOME OF YOUR COMMENTS ARE APPALLING! I AM TRYING TO KEEP THEM FROM MR. SANDOW! STOP NOW! (NOT A JOKE) SINCERELY, IGNATIUS #WWE

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Down with Zhang. Let there be Biscuit!

Also, I'm disappointed nobody else mentioned how much Silent Rage sucks.

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Xbox GT: PrivateBiscuit1
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Maybe Silent Rage just needs a better name. Like.... Passive Aggression?

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SuperNiceDog didn't have to reconcile his name...
But Dauntless Hunter is now MrGreenonion

Tranquil Hysteria?

Yeah, but Silent Rage is another way of saying "Generic Loser With No Charisma".

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Gets Angry But Won't Do Anything About It

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FCW - August 28, 2011

Alright, another broken episode. :-/ WWE must've went crazy on marking everything around this time. I can't find any method of watching it completely.

The show begins with Seth Rollins (c) vs Dean Ambrose for the 15 Championship in a rematch. The twist? This time it's a 20 minute iron man match. (Because they chanted FIVE MORE MINUTES! at the end of the last match) In case anyone is wondering, FCW's video team is like WWE-lite. Still a very awesome package at the start of this match. Seth Rollins immediately goes after Dean Ambrose without even taking off his shirt or 15 Championship (It's a gold medal, btw, in case somebody was unaware). Damn, Dean Ambrose is very good at playing dirty. Dean Ambrose's selling is really... awkward, by the way. It's very unique. I like it. Anyway, the match goes to the 3 minute mark and then something incredibly awesome happens. Dean mounts Seth in the corner to give him the classic ten punch, but then Seth rushes forward, holding Dean up, then powerbombs him into the opposite corner. Seth then winds up for the Avada Kadavra, but Ambrose rushes forward in the huge clothesline, then he crushes Seth Rollins with the Midnight Special (His Emerald Frosion). But... Seth kicks out of it! Seth ducks a clothesline later and then on the rebound, rolls Dean Ambrose up, but releases the pin immediately. Ambrose kneels and AVADA KADABRA! But Dean Ambrose is kicked straight out of the ring. There's a bit of a THIS IS AWESOME chant. Seth Rollins can't pin Ambrose because he keeps getting limbs on the bottom rope. But then Dean Ambrose says f*** all of this and hits Rollins out of the ring and starts brawling on the outside, even taking it to announce table. Dean Ambrose tries to hit the Midnight Special through the table, but Seth fights out! They duke it out on the table, exchanging punches, but then they both fall off the table. 0-0 draw match. Daaaaaaamn. That was an awesome match. These guys are seriously awesome. So Seth Rollins retains his title, and Regal tells everyone in FCW, RAW, and Smackdown that they need to match Seth Rollins and Dean Ambrose's quality. I kinda agree.

And arrrrgh I miss out on another Brad Maddox promo. Wtf guys? Brad Maddox deserves you immortalizing his stuff on the internet! Brad Maddox comes out with two bodyguards and claims they will ensure that he will not get sucker kicked in the face again by Richie Steamboat. He also mentions that he was only knocked out because Richie had an illegal street shoe. So Richie comes out and superkicks Brad Maddox, knocking him out. One of his bodyguards attacks Richie and gets superkicked as well. Then Richie tells the last bodyguard that he's lucky because he gets to carry them both out. But then when the bodyguard goes to pick up Brad, he gets a superkick. Holy s***, Richie Steamboat is a badass. I'm very sad I don't get to see this.

Then I miss an interview with CJ Parker and Donny Marlow about being the new Florida Tag Team Champions. Apparently Parker was stupid and Donny Marlow was... well, Donny Marlow. That's as best as I can describe that. I don't think I missed much.

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