Poll of the Day > Do you think it's ok for a 45 yr old to be in a serious relationship w/ an 18

(+) Yeah! (+)

VVingless_____ posted...

Porn is poison, I do not watch it.

Lol.

Nichtcrawler X posted...

Once the age difference becomes more than a generation, that kinda becomes a form of authority.

No it doesn't.
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^ There are dozens of neurological studies to that show porn use causes identical effects on the brain as hardcore drug abuse. There are zero positive effects from watching porn.

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VVingless_____ posted...

^ There are dozens of neurological studies to that show porn use causes identical effects on the brain as hardcore drug abuse. There are zero positive effects from watching porn.

By definition it isn't poison.
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xjayguyx posted...

Serious relationship no.. for a 45 year old guy to be interested in a 18 year old girl.. that guy has serious issues.

My wife's youngest sister started seeing a 25 year old guy when she was 18 and let's just say that 25 year old doesn't come around me or the wife's dad anymore. Disgusting.

Now if it's just nsa sex eh.. what ever then.

That's not even that big of an age gap, tbh... At least, it doens't really seem like one...

Bulbasaur posted...

>There are plenty mature, intelligent, and respectful 18 year old girls.
>Women mature/peak quickly, usually 20, 25.

so which is it.

I mean, while I don't really agree to everything they're saying, these two things don't really contradict each other. He didn't say all women for either. If you want to point out flaws, that's fine. But these two things can technically both be true at the same time...

VVingless_____ posted...

the white knight phenomonen is a very real thing.

I do believe it happens. But people really are quick to use it. I got accused of being a while knight for some chick on another board. And that was obviously not the case. But people will believe anything sometimes...

epik_fail1 posted...

I mean 18-45 is weird I admit, but I know a lesbian couple that met in a bar at those age and so far they have been together for 7 years.

There's a subreddit for couples with age gaps. It seems like a good amount of them work out pretty well. I think it just depends on the people. All long as they're happy and love each other, it should really matter to other people, like you said earlier. Love is love. Some people may love someone, regardless of age...

VVingless_____ posted...

^ There are dozens of neurological studies to that show porn use causes identical effects on the brain as hardcore drug abuse. There are zero positive effects from watching porn.

IIRC, I think there was a study that also showed that porn could help lower sexual crimes, as well...
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I think General rule of thumb is half your age plus 7

Of course.

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it's highly suspect, and if one of them is 18 i'd question the length of their relationship since they couldn't have been 18 for more than a year

i'm generally into older guys myself but the oldest i've gone was 30 (i'm 24). i struggle to think of much i'd have in common with a 45 year old, that's the same age group as my mom

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Lets look at this logically.

For the man, women are often most attractive from 18-30 or so, there are plenty of very attractive women over 30 mind you, but they were probably MORE attractive when a bit younger. I'm 50 and honestly admit that I find young women more attractive then most my age.

Secondly for the man, a young women often has more energy, sense of fun, more things to discover, and can bring new life and enjoyment into the mans life. There could certainly not only be attraction (sexual and otherwise) but a deep relationship could form as the older man gains a sense of youth, or revisits his youth through his partner.

For the woman, at least I have heard some find older men more attractive. The man is (hopefully) more secure in his life by that time, so you don't have to worry about many of the things younger men might do (lose their job, not have one, cheat (hopefully) as much, etc. The older man will probably really appreciate the younger woman as well, which could be important to her, and he again hopefully, will have a solid personality he has devoloped (which she may really like).

So I can see attraction and even a real deep relationship happening from both sides........but that being said.

The older man is well older, the relationship could last awhile, but if he's in his late 40s and she is 18, by the time she is 28 he is going to be at retirement age, and by 35 he's over 60 and maybe using a walker lol. As a man I would consider that very unfair to the 18 year old, and seriously consider if it's fair to enter into a long term relationship. A short one maybe, but if the feelings are already strong, it might be best to break it off before it solidifies. Also, not all, but many older men are less active, and being in a relationship with him might drag down
the woman as well, so she doesn't have the fun she should (and we all should have) in her late teens and 20's.
Your probably not going to burning man, white water rafting, traveling europe etc, with some 45+ year old dude.

For the woman, you could easily totally break that mans heart if you get tired of a relationship with him later. To him your like a magical unicorn and he is the luckiest dude in the world. If you don't feel that way and are just trying things out with an older dude, it could really end badly lol. A serious relationship with someone that much older may start out great, and even last for a few years, but when your 23 and he's 50, or your 28 and he's 55 and looking for a retirement community to join, it might not be so fun. Also having kids (if you get really serious) might not only be problamatic, but if you have been together for a few years before trying (lets hope), he would be almost 80 before the kid/s were grown. So if kids are important to you, that is another reason to possibly pass.

Over all though I believe love is a rare and beautiful thing and you should grab it when you find it. There are certainly obstacles in such a relationship and especially if it's a younger girl and older man, society may frown on it, and you'll get things like people calling her your daughter or grandaughter or something lol...but if your both happy, that is what is really important.

I've never dated etc someone more then a year or so younger than me, but then again, I didn't date that many people. Now that I'm older, I would not consider dating someone under 30 myself, even if I really like them (and I have met people like that) i keep it on a just friends level.

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@wolfy42 What about the other way around? You only talked about one way...
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People answering No want more government control over the love lives of adults.

Wonder how many of them are LGBT and were too lazy to think of the parallel?

faramir77 posted...

It's legal, but it's fucking weird.

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We all know there's a magic switch in everyone's brain that flicks on the second they turn 18 and makes them a fully functional adult able to make decisions and deal with the consequences, right?

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Zareth posted...

We all know there's a magic switch in everyone's brain that flicks on the second they turn 18 and makes them a fully functional adult able to make decisions and deal with the consequences, right?

Not everyone's at the same maturity level just based on age alone...
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LinkPizza posted...

@wolfy42 What about the other way around? You only talked about one way...

I just briefly said if it's a older man and a younger girl society might have a problem with it, not so much the other way around.

I think all the same things apply for the opposite genders though, I would say no age limits at all post 30 (so like a 30 year old with a 60 year old is fine), but if someone is still developing and active etc, I don't think it's right to get in a serious relationship with them if your much older.

That is just my personal opinion though, and I certainly wouldn't force it on others.

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It is legal but creepy. That would like dating your parent's friend agewise. I couldn't relate to someone with that much of an age difference.

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Tight

wolfy42 posted...

Your probably not going to burning man, white water rafting, traveling europe etc, with some 45+ year old dude.

Implying any of this is necessary.

You don't have to be tied at the hip in any relationship so as long as you're not using burning man and travelling to go bangin', what's the problem? You do what you want with the people who best match with that, and if you're 18 dating a 45 year old, you most likely don't want to be out clubbing every night.
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Uh no a 45 year old should not be in a relationship with an 18 year old period.

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Kyuubi4269 posted...

Implying any of this is necessary.

You don't have to be tied at the hip in any relationship so as long as you're not using burning man and travelling to go bangin', what's the problem? You do what you want with the people who best match with that, and if you're 18 dating a 45 year old, you most likely don't want to be out clubbing every night.

I just don't get why people want to force other people to do things their ways. It's just none of my business. Even at 31, I would not date a 45 years old, but if other people want to do it who I am to judge?

And the people who say "I don't want to force it on other, but it should not happen" it sounds like "I am not racist, but *insert racist comment here*.

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VVingless_____ posted...

^ There are dozens of neurological studies to that show porn use causes identical effects on the brain as hardcore drug abuse. There are zero positive effects from watching porn.

Sex might be close to something like a drug because certain drugs mimic the effects of sex, but masturbation isn't necessarily different than sex

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Yellow posted...

Sex might be close to something like a drug because certain drugs mimic the effects of sex, but masturbation isn't necessarily different than sex

I never said anything about masturbation. I was talking about porn, specifically porn as it is now in the form of free and high speed streaming.

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VVingless_____ posted...

I never said anything about masturbation. I was talking about porn, specifically porn as it is now in the form of free and high speed streaming.

I'd be curious to see those studies as I have a lot of doubts about them. When I broke up with my ex, I did not feel like meeting new people for quite a while and porn helped me to stimulate me while I was single. Like it was just relieving to be in my bubble after being always with someone for 3 years.

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CedarPointcp posted...

do you think so

They are both consenting adults so sure. I find younger and older folk attractive. Providing it's legal it doesn't matter to me.

BUMPED2002 posted...

Uh no a 45 year old should not be in a relationship with an 18 year old period.

I do love when people elaborate on their posts.

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Unwanted judgement on someone's relationship is not just nosy , it's also very wrong. In terms of modern human ethics it's beyond the line and shows underdeveloped civility.

Someone who judges other's relationship ( especially in public statements ) that doesn't involve them should be thought of basic boundaries that shows a proper manners , respect and civility.


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Absolutely!!

LinkPizza posted...

Zareth posted...
We all know there's a magic switch in everyone's brain that flicks on the second they turn 18 and makes them a fully functional adult able to make decisions and deal with the consequences, right?

Not everyone's at the same maturity level just based on age alone...

Yeah its extremely huge social baggage for people with social disabilities, such as Autism/Aspergers.

Im lagging behind several years in mental/physical maturity because the frontal lobe of my brain did not fully develop when it was supposed to, but yet society pressures me to date another person around my age just based off a number? Screw that way of thinking.

Also as a counter-statement to Zareth's post, I would love to know about the magical age at which you stop finding young adults attractive? Spoiler-alert, there isnt an age.

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BUMPED2002 posted...

Uh no a 45 year old should not be in a relationship with an 18 year old period.

Citation needed.
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deoxxys posted...

Yeah its extremely huge social baggage for people with social disabilities, such as Autism/Aspergers.

Im lagging behind several years in mental/physical maturity because the frontal lobe of my brain did not fully develop when it was supposed to, but yet society pressures me to date another person around my age just based off a number? Screw that way of thinking.

Also as a counter-statement to Zareth's post, I would love to know about the magical age at which you stop finding young adults attractive? Spoiler-alert, there isnt an age.

Red flag city

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Jen0125 posted...

Red flag city

Yeah because you can begin to fathom what its like to have even mild autism.
This is the rest of the society's mindset, consenting adults can date who ever the hell they want.

Screw you.

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America_Dude posted...

Shes referring to your statement about wanting to fuck teenagers simply because theyre attractive to you regardless of age. Creeper.

no one said anything about teenagers bitch boy

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LinkPizza posted...

Not everyone's at the same maturity level just based on age alone...

According to the law, they are though.
I thought my post was obviously sarcastic, but I guess it wasn't clear enough.


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Zareth posted...

According to the law, they are though.
I thought my post was obviously sarcastic, but I guess it wasn't clear enough.

It sounded sarcastic, but the other way. Though the law is stupid and always changing. And different everywhere.For how sexually freeing the US is, it's always very sexually stunted compared to many other places in the world. Though, I guess each country has their own problems...

America_Dude posted...

You might want to look at the topic title then, creeper. Stop trying to go back on your pedophilia.

Well, you'd be wrong a lot. First of all, for teenagers, it would be ephebophilia, which is different. Second, being 18 makes them a legally consenting adult. So how the hell is that wrong? Lastly, I don't even think their post mentioned any age specifically. They mentioned that society pressure them to date because of their age, even though they don't think they're ready. And ask at what age you would stop finding young adult attractive...
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LinkPizza posted...

It sounded sarcastic, but the other way. Though the law is stupid and always changing. And different everywhere.For how sexually freeing the US is, it's always very sexually stunted compared to many other places in the world. Though, I guess each country has their own problems...

Well, you'd be wrong a lot. First of all, for teenagers, it would be ephebophilia, which is different. Second, being 18 makes them a legally consent adult. So how the hell is that wrong? Lastly, I don't even think their post mentioned any age specifically. They mentioned that society pressure them to date because of their age, even though they don't think they're ready. And ask at what age you would stop finding young adult attractive...

Yeah I don't get the point made of check the thread title.

While technically a teenager (by the fact that teen is in eighteen), an eighteen years old is generally considered a legal adult.

Eighteen year olds are allowed to fuck up their lives colossally in a variety of ways, and may be expected to have their entire lives together and be solely responsible for themselves just by the virtue of having hit that birthday.

The idea that someone who is told that they're an adult and needs to act like it is being considered a child is baffling to me, as a blanket thought.

Amount of life experience and brain development can make an age gap like that questionable, however that isn't always the case even.

I'm not even going to pretend to know every situation. Abusive and predatory relationships are abusive and predatory regardless. Younger people are absolutely capable of being abusive too. Again, I'm not saying there's not factors that can weigh in favor of an older person, but I feel like people forget that.

ChaosAzeroth posted...

Yeah I don't get the point made of check the thread title.

While technically a teenager (by the fact that teen is in eighteen), an eighteen years old is generally considered a legal adult.

Eighteen year olds are allowed to fuck up their lives colossally in a variety of ways, and may be expected to have their entire lives together and be solely responsible for themselves just by the virtue of having hit that birthday.

The idea that someone who is told that they're an adult and needs to act like it is being considered a child is baffling to me, as a blanket thought.

Amount of life experience and brain development can make an age gap like that questionable, however that isn't always the case even.

I'm not even going to pretend to know every situation. Abusive and predatory relationships are abusive and predatory regardless. Younger people are absolutely capable of being abusive too. Again, I'm not saying there's not factors that can weigh in favor of an older person, but I feel like people forget that.

Honestly older people are gullible as fuck and are the most common victims of catfishing(I know their is young people who fall for it too). But a lot of scammers specifically target people older than 50. So I find it funny when people talk like being older give you automatically power. If anything I feel powerful at my age compared to people over 40.

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LinkPizza posted...

And ask at what age you would stop finding young adult attractive...

But everyone's made up their minds to grow out of finding 18 year olds attractive.

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America_Dude posted...

You might want to look at the topic title then, creeper. Stop trying to go back on your pedophilia.

If you think an 18 year old is pedophilia then you ate far too many paint chips as a child.
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deoxxys posted...

no one said anything about teenagers bitch boy

I suggest not falling for his bait. He clearly is aware of your condition and just want to take advantage of you for his trolling. I have a friend with your condition so I sympatise with you and I'll just advice blocking him.

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Just because something is legal doesn't make it right and not creepy.

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SpaceBear_ posted...

Just because something is legal doesn't make it right and not creepy.

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/boards/3-poll-of-the-day/78673668/938938051
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SpaceBear_ posted...

Just because something is legal doesn't make it right and not creepy.

Just because you think its creepy an wrong doesnt mean it actually is. Just because you dont like something doesnt mean you can tell people who they should and shouldnt love...
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epik_fail1 posted...

I suggest not falling for his bait. He clearly is aware of your condition and just want to take advantage of you for his trolling. I have a friend with your condition so I sympathize with you and I'll just advice blocking him.

Thanks, I appreciate it.
:]

Thankfully I didnt have to reply because I felt like the next few posters said most of what needed to be said.


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Some of the old hens will be salty about it but if you guys are happy who are we to judge.

They're adults, and it's legal, so who cares? It's none of my business. That's how I think about it.

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America_Dude posted...

If you want to be put into the same creeper category, point out the difference between pedo and ephebophilia while defending someone elses obviously creepy post.

In this case neither apply since an 18 year old is 100% legal.
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It's unusual sure but I have far more important things to worry about than what two consenting strangers are doing. If they make each other happy and the guy doesn't bail when the girl gets pregnant, etc, then props to 'em.

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