Board 8 > All-Purpose Wrestling Topic 398: Who Gives a Hoot About Impact?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Not even the Anthem Owl
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Give a hoot.
Don't pollute.
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BONESAW gives a HOOT
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TheRock1525 posted...

Give a hoot.
Don't pollute.

Too late
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Rolling thoughts on TNA Impact.

Video package of people who left the promotion saying that they will make TNA great. I do not understand why they do not sell us on their current wrestlers here.

The intro keeps cutting to a random owl.

The first segment of TNA Impact's new show is a brawl between two guys who look like two f***ing guys. Why should any new viewers care or be intrigued? Pope sounds bored out of his mind on commentary.

Josh Matthews with the hammiest acting confused why there's a spot for a third person at the announce table. Why are we spending time on a segment for a commentator feud as the second thing a new viewer would be seeing on this show. And why is this segment SO LONG? Pope looks like he wants to die during this.

13 minutes in, Cody Rhodes declares we can start the show. And then he calls out Moose. And immediately after, we are told that Moose isn't actually here. Why did this happen?

Reno Scum vs DCC. As a new viewer, I know more about Josh Matthews and Mike Tenay from this match than I know about Reno Scum and DCC. Pope tries to interject to actually commentate on the match while Borash and Matthews argue. This match is impossible to focus on because of this commentary and the fact that the cameras keep going to the announcers instead of the ring.

It cuts to a commercial and then when we return, we witness the last 60+ seconds of the match, and instead of the commentators doing a voice over of the final moments of the match, they keep everything in, including the commentary. Then they go backstage to an interview with Reno Scum that is totally boring and you can't hear the guy who is asking the questions because it is mic'd so poorly.

Recap of the wedding segment which actually looks like the first entertaining thing on this show. Sienna then berates the backstage interviewer and bullies her with terrible acting and threatens Allie.

Next up is an X-Division fourway which probably should have opened the show. Still find it hard to watch with JB and Matthews just sniping at each other the whole time. These guys get no time, the Marshe dude almost injures Sutter with a terribly done Buckle Bomb. And then I guess Laurel Van Ness is still drunk and screaming in her wedding dress after the match.

Rachel Ellering vs Sienna is JB and Matthews arguing. When they aren't arguing, I s*** you not, they don't speak. They literally don't speak. It is dead silence when they aren't yelling at each other. And any time JB tries to speak about Rachel and put her over, Matthews just tells him to shut up. There is a point during this match, after 15 seconds of silence, Matthews goes "Shut up JB." Pope tries to maintain order but... I don't know. Matthews has his freak out. Pope tries to talk, but Matthews keeps screaming. Sienna wins with a shoulder block I hope isn't actually her finisher.

Josh Matthews is furious about Bruce Pritchard for some reason. He is talking about his podcast like anyone knows or cares about it. Somebody yells that Bruce Pritchard ruined TNA and he goes "Some people do think that, pal!" and then keeps talking about how he and the people in charged almost made it great. He says it's now Impact Wrestling, not TNA. I feel like they've tried to re-brand TNA as Impact Wrestling already. He claims he knows how to make TNA great because The Rock, Stone Cold, and John Cena existed at the same time he did. Then he introduces Bobby Lashley as the best and they talk about s*** I can't possibly care about. And then Alberto El Patron comes out to a super weak reaction. They eventually chant his name I guess. They argue, EC3 comes out and is promptly the only interesting person in the ring. But Pritchard, I guess, makes Alberto vs Lashley. Which, I guess, is exciting.

Angelina Love exists still I guess and after the most wooden promo by Eddie Edwards, she slaps him. Yup.
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Cody Rhodes comes out demanding to fight Moose. Borash tells him that Moose is in Japan. Cody says he'll refuse to leave until Moose comes out. Then Cody leaves when Moose doesn't come out. Okay then.

Dutch Mantell is on his segway to talk. So we have two old fat guys trying to tell us about how they're going to make TNA great. I SWEAR they have the same canned in cheering. I swear on my life, they use the same cheers when Dutch is speaking multiple times. He tells us that people left TNA because TNA sucked. They have him talk forever just to say that he, the fat old man on a segway, is the voice for the fans. A guy whose role is to apparently just give advice and they have him talk about it for like ten minutes.

After the Hardy Boyz do weird wrestling with a kangaroo, Decay now has the tag titles for no reason and proclaims the Hardys deleted and gone. This made absolutely no sense.

They announce Slammiversary and Josh Matthews freaks out and says nobody would ever want to buy it since JB announced it because he's ugly and stupid.

Alberto vs Lashley starts and I can't watch this whole thing. I am drained and Josh Matthews and JB are just murdering my interest in this. They just argue constantly. At least when Graves trashes on Byron Saxton it's just a remark and then they move on, and he doesn't sound totally ignorant, so you can still take him seriously. With Matthews, he's such an obnoxious, whiny jerk that even when he tries to give serious commentary, you can't take it seriously. I skip to the end. Alberto hits Lashley with the belt after ref bumps and wins. He celebrates with controversy, which begs the question why he relinquishes the belt next week if he doesn't care that he cheated and content?

I will not watch TNA Impact Wrestling again. This was awful. Truly, you need to watch it to understand just how bad it is. I don't think I had fun watching any of this. I do not understand how they can be proud of this.
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He gives the belt back next week because Pritchard makes him.

And then wins a #1 contender match to fight Lashley again
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Another hilarious thing: Moose was there. He's in Japan NOW, when the show AIRED.

So they're GOING OUT OF THEIR WAY to pretend it's live, when anyone who would be following Moose's NOAH tour would surely already know it's taped.
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https://twitter.com/rebyhardy/status/840315276608565248
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Birdy McBirdface
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If it hasnt been mentioned, just read her whole twitter today.
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Omg Reby's Twitter timeline.

God damn.

TNA just got demolished. My favorite one was the one about Jeff Jarrett drunk texting Matt.
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The Hardys offered to come in for these shows for their indie nightly rate, for however many of those four days worth of tapings TNA needed, to write their characters out and put someone over.

But TNA would rather just burn their last bit of Hardy Compound b-roll and Poochie them out of the titles instead.
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What slays me is that it's like the writers went "We don't really get how this Hardy stuff works, so let's just have Decay teleport in with the titles. That makes enough sense, right?"

Like what.
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Pritchard doesn't let them keep those titles either.

So that's two championships by show's end possessed by people who officially do not have them.
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...Did they even show the women's champion or the X Division champion either? Because I feel like I would have remembered them if they did.

But I know Reno Scum are champions of some Nevada promotion. And that Cody Rhodes has a title from a company I'm not sure actually exists or existed at one point.
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Trevor Lee is X-Division Champ and he was not on the show

Rosemary is Knockout's Champ and she appeared briefly with Decay <_<
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Well they're not important. What's important is Bruce Pritchard being in management and Dutch Mantell being... um... vaguely employed?
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Is Dutch like a bad booker? Cause he was a damn good performer with the Real Americans.
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Jakyl25 posted...

The Hardys offered to come in for these shows for their indie nightly rate, for however many of those four days worth of tapings TNA needed, to write their characters out and put someone over.

But TNA would rather just burn their last bit of Hardy Compound b-roll and Poochie them out of the titles instead.

hey jakyl, is it me or did the hardys mellow out in recent years? like if you were to tell me matt and jeff would've put this deal out there even 4 years ago i'd have called bulls***. it seems a lot like gaining creative control and playing around with the characters they wanted to do made them super chill.
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I don't know. But I was told for 10 minutes that he doesn't work for TNA. He just tells them what the fans want and that TNA can refuse to listen to him if they want.

So I have no idea what this grandfather in a segway's purpose is.
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To me this seems like Jarrett trying to emulate the booking style where he was personally most successful: Vince Russo's 2000 WCW run

And doing a bad job at even that level of quality.
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Wanglicious posted...

hey jakyl, is it me or did the hardys mellow out in recent years? like if you were to tell me matt and jeff would've put this deal out there even 4 years ago i'd have called bulls***. it seems a lot like gaining creative control and playing around with the characters they wanted to do made them super chill.

I would put it more on fatherhood <_<
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So next week the vacant Tag Titles are on the line in a four-way match between Decay, Reno Scum who just debuted last night, and two teams who literally debut next week

Truly the tag team division has never been hotter.

EDIT: but yeah, break up the Wolves, that's a swell idea.
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So there's two sides to every story and I probably shouldn't make snap judgments.... but.... after reading Reby's Twitter... if that's even 10% accurate, I want nothing to do with these people. The Hardys were the reason I got back into TNA, so I guess I'll be following them wherever they go. Does ROH have a TV show? What network and what time?
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Yes

What's your TV market?

Also they have a PPV (like an actual old-school $40 on your cable service PPV) airing as we speak
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What does that question mean? Are they not on a normal channel?
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They are owned by a broadcasting conglomerate who owns myriad local stations across the country.

http://rohwrestling.com/content/ROHTVListings

They also put their shows up online for free but on a few days delay.
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Though SPOILERS they might only be with ROH for a month or so. Depends on what WWE offers. They're only contracted through the end of April for now.
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https://twitter.com/aznfevr/status/840397821014622210

Look at this ridiculous 6-man tag WWE can just throw out there at a house show any time they please

(Finn's first match back BTW)
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literally not on in Houston

even compared to TNA this is amateur hour!
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TNA's legal threat was enough to get them to not use the "Broken Matt" and "Brother Nero" names tonight :-(
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But hey...

https://twitter.com/rebyhardy/status/840418782732570624
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I get ROH on Comet on Wednesday nights.

Pretty decent show most of the time. Often in consideration for the best wrestling show of the week-- partially cause it's an hour probably.
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But the Hardy's can't even superkick...
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the bucks of youth have been made obsolete
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Man, did Triple H really come out and wrestle some random ass house show in Buffalo, NY?

The epitome of just doing it coz this s*** is still fun to him.
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This is probably the happiest I've been all year and that's a little sad.
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Lopen posted...

I get ROH on Comet on Wednesday nights.

Pretty decent show most of the time. Often in consideration for the best wrestling show of the week-- partially cause it's an hour probably.

literally never heard of comet
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lol tried to watch the latest episode on their website and the video quality is horrible and its constantly freezing and buffering

f*** this noise
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SmartMuffin posted...

lol tried to watch the latest episode on their website and the video quality is horrible and its constantly freezing and buffering

f*** this noise

you might say their streaming service is...


broken
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http://www.comettv.com/watch-live/

If you have a Roku

https://channelstore.roku.com/details/140565/comet-tv
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live?

LIVE?

what the f*** do they think this is, 2004?
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Ring of Honor is old school you must honor the old ways
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Whew reby
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man I never expected to take the hardyz side on drama outside of the edge thing
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SmartMuffin posted...

So there's two sides to every story and I probably shouldn't make snap judgments.... but.... after reading Reby's Twitter... if that's even 10% accurate, I want nothing to do with these people. The Hardys were the reason I got back into TNA, so I guess I'll be following them wherever they go. Does ROH have a TV show? What network and what time?

I mean.

I don't think she would lie about suing Senor Benjamin. Because who the hell could even make that up? So I'm more inclined to think most if not all of what she's saying is true.
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Is it sad that I'm more looking forward to the promo videos than any individual matches right now?

Which brings me to the question, what are considering the best promo/hype videos in WWE history? The ones that spring to mind are Taker/Shawn WM 26, Punk/Cena MITB, Bryan WM30. Any obvious ones I'm missing? I guess Rock/Austin WM but what else?

WWE promo video team is really their MVP!

...Well, I absolutely need to watch the ROH main event.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XBgbI35memU

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O20Po-_kyuk


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7zLWQNsIr_Q
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