Board 8 > All-Purpose Wrestling Topic 149: The Woo Woo Woo Network

(+) Yeah! (+)

I don't think so, but the Sin Cara mask makes him sound muffled.

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Xbox GT: PrivateBiscuit1
Down with Zhang. Let there be Biscuit!

DeathChicken posted...
Zeke's one of those guys that just had his momentum killed dead by jobbing all the time. Mean, he's supposed to be this monster, but he got beat clean by Cody Rhodes like three times in a row, then by Henry. Hell, he's lost to Ted Dibiase. No wonder the crowd doesn't care. They wouldn't care about Mark Henry either, if they put him over as a beast, then he went out there and lost clean to Curt Hawkins

Only the rematch with Cody and the match with Henry was clean, to be fair.

I agree with Wang though, Zeke would be cool with just a couple more moves.

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XIIIiscool (2:47 am): *gets in a car* I'M F***ING COMING FOR YOU RUSTY
RustyMrMokka has left the room.

- Rosa Mendes hit up Twitter over the weekend, and did not have some kind words for some of the other WWE Divas. Here are some of the comments she made, which are believed to be directed towards AJ and Kaitlyn…

"If i'm making people upset, I don't really care. I'm sick of seeing the Divas division ruined by these rookies. Sexy, smart, powerful!"

"Stay in FCW and stop shopping at Target chicas!"

"One rookie looks 12 with a crater face, one looks like she is 40 and the other one looks like she needs to go on Jenny Craig."

"something happened, if you knew you would understand. Don't stop loving me:) Rosa Mendes doesn't go on a rant for no reason."

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or a special pair of boots that have magnets on the bottom so you can do some things that have never been possible before.

rosa mendes' real name is melina

this almost certainly has something to do with it

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http://i.imgur.com/5vOFJ.gif

anyway I can't find the suicide league, so if its still running I'm just going to put my pick in here

HHH

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Boring and mundane signature informing you I'm on a Droid
Now with more bold! Less italics due to bold.

Yeah this is probably gonna be a bye week or it's kaput. I would've put the topic up but I only know who you and I picked last week and don't have all the eliminations.

Would've picked Mark Henry though (maybe if everyone posts their pick in here we don't need to have a bye week...!)

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No problem!
This is a cute and pop genocide of love!

PWB had a "dream WM" topic again, where you make a card out of anybody you want in their prime. I decided to approach it from a business standpoint rather than my personal taste, and this is what I got:

WWE Title: John Cena v. Ric Flair
-I figured I'd space the major title matches throughout the card to pace it a bit. I had both Lesnar and Hogan as Cena's opponent, but figured Flair deserved it more, would be a good foil for Cena, and would cause fewer smarks to riot. Unfortunately, Cena's gotta go over.

DX (HHH/HBK/X-Pac) v. nWo (Hogan/Hall/Nash)
-We all wanted this match during the Attitude Era, and it gives an excuse to keep Hogan out of the major matches, at the expense of wasting HBK. nWo wins after tons of shenanigans and interference from both sides and an X-Pac turn.

US Title: Chris Jericho v. Eddie Guerrero v. CM Punk v. Ricky Steamboat
-Just four good wrestlers going at it. I couldn't fit Steamboat/Savage on the card, but figured Steamboat needed a slot and would fit well here. Considered Benoit, but wouldn't want to stir up that much controversy. I'd probably give it to Eddie?

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio Jr. v. AJ Styles
-I feel like there would be better choices, but I can't think of any. Feel like Styles should go over.

Unified Tag Titles TLC: Dudley Boyz v. Edge and Christian v. Legion of Doom v. Motor City Machine Guns
- I wanted to do two of the teams who headlined the TLC era, plus one old-school and one modern. Dudleyz are a given, and E&C get in over the Hardyz because they haven't disgraced themselves and frankly Edge deserves a spot more than anybody in contention. I feel like LoD would be the most comfortable of the classic tag teams in this kinda affair, and MCMG are almost the only modern team worth considering. I'd say Dudleyz win.

Submission Match: Bret Hart v. Kurt Angle
-This was gonna be for a midcard belt, but then I realized it wouldn't need it. Proooobably Bret goes over.

World Title: Steve Austin v. The Rock
-I feel like a card full of never-happened cross-era dream matches should have at least one classic rivalry in a headlining position, and this is it. Hard to argue against these two deserving the spot, either. I'd give it to Rock because I feel he'd be a slightly bigger draw, plus we promised Rock/Cena already.

Brock Lesnar v. Andre the Giant
-Prime Lesnar showing up after his MMA run would be HUGE, enough so that I had him in a title match originally. He proooobably doesn't deserve that, but I think having him and Andre would make a good "attraction" match, especially if he can hit the F5.

IC Title: Randy Savage v. Roddy Piper
-Honestly, these are my two big "but they should be on the card :\" leftover guys.

Women's Title: Trish Stratus v. Mickie James
-Bathroom break to be sure, but still a darned good match.

Undertaker v. Sting
-There's no excuse for not giving Taker somebody fresh and exciting on this card, but the dude's been around so damn long that it really narrows the field even with all time to pick from. I can't think of anybody better than Sting, even factoring out how hyped we all got for the idea last WM.

Title Unification: John Cena v. The Rock
-A card like this DEMANDS a "Modern v. Classic" showdown. There is NOBODY bigger than Cena these days, and while you could make arguments for a few vets over Rock, he has mainstream appeal rivaled only by Hogan, whose workrate won't quite be good enough to carry Cena. Being a smark, though, I gotta give Rock the win here.

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~Tommeri Uranius Bombaldi the Fourth, esq.
(aka not Krakenprophet)

Alive(5):

DpOblivion (CM Punk, Cody Rhodes, Kofi, Evan Bourne)
Dante: (Sheamus, Del Rio, Cena, Orton)
XIII_Rocks (JoMo, Del Rio, A-ry,Orton)
chocoboslayer ( Beth Phoenix, Alberto Del Rio, Daniel Bryan, Orton)
Lopen(Sheamus, Cody Rhodes, Kelly Kelly, Orton)

Week 4 elim:
voltch:( Sheamus, Del Rio, Orton, Kelly Kelly)
Sensi ( Alex Riley, Cody Rhodes, Evan Bourne, Daniel bryan)

Week 3 eliminations:

illuminatusbubu (David Otunga, Alberto Del Rio, Beth Phoenix)
JONALEON1 (Beth Phoenix, Del Rio, Titus O'neil)
zea: (Brodus Clay, Del Rio, Titus O' Neil)
Maniac: ( Beth Phoenix, Ryder, Cody Rhodes)
eaedwards6400 (R Truth, Alberto Del Rio, Mark Henry)
Wizardsfan1000(Beth Phoenix, Kelly Kelly, Ultimate Warrior)
Nee(Sheamus, Del Rio, Ultimate Warrior)

Week 2:
Sir Chris(CM Punk, Ultimate Warrior)
SmartMuffin (Sheamus, Ultimate Warrior)
Greatone10 (BethPhoenix, Ultimate Warrior)
ShatteredElysium (Sheamus, Beth)
Whiskey Nick (Sheamus, Punk)
MartinFF7(Cena, Otunga)
Scarcehan (Orton,Ziggler)
Dark Spiral (Rey Mysterio, Christian)
Sytha (Cena,Orton)
KommunistKoala( Beth Phoenix, Orton)
junk_funk (Sheamus, Orton)
Deathchicken (Beth Phoenix,Orton)
Gr8CyberMonkey (JoMo, Orton)
Regaro (Sheamus, Orton)
Jakyl (Titus O'neil, Sheamus)
Panthera (JoMo, Sheamus)
GTM (Sheamus, Sin Cara)
Dr. Football(Mark Henry ,Bryan)
Dauntless Hunter ( The Miz, Ezekiel Jackson)

Week 1:
Tombolo(Christian)
Coffee (Christian)
Haguile (Zack Ryder)
FFDragon (Zack Ryder)
War (Daniel Bryan)
sonten1(Daniel Bryan)
Semi (Daniel Bryan)
viviff (Daniel Bryan)
Highwind89 (Daniel Bryan)
W_C (The Ultimate Warrior)
PepsiPlunge ( Evan Bourne)


I know I picked Punk, I think Lopen took Sin Cara, XIII took HHH, Dp took Cena, and Chocobo took Sheamus

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boring and mundane signature
Now with more bold! Less Italics due to bold

I know I took Sheamus, so assuming this thing will still be rolling on...Kelly Kelly is where I'm going this time.

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PotD's OFFICIAL King of Games!
The Choco. The Cream of Yuna Fanboyism.

http://www.wwe.com/superstars/raw/tripleh/successors-to-the-game

Number 5 is the best

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GREEN RANGER
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WWE.com absolutely loves Ryder lately.

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SEP Nash, Smelling Like the Vault since 1996
Step FOUR! Get Paid! http://img.imgcake.com/stevenashgifpu.gif

Now all I have in my head is Triple H as Darth Vader, trying to seduce Ryder to the dark side.

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or a special pair of boots that have magnets on the bottom so you can do some things that have never been possible before.

"Zack, I am your father."
"My dad's right here, bro."
"...Him? Really? Wow. That explains a lot."

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SEP Nash, Smelling Like the Vault since 1996
Step FOUR! Get Paid! http://img.imgcake.com/stevenashgifpu.gif

Smash cut to Mr. Ryder making out with a Melina stand-up

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or a special pair of boots that have magnets on the bottom so you can do some things that have never been possible before.

Dos!

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bad advice
http://img.imgcake.com/viktorpnges.png

Wow that Raw was kinda ****.

Bret and Cena vs Del Rio and Ricardo (more like Cena vs Ricardo)
Vickie vs Kelly Kelly
King and Sheamus squash McTunga
A match we just saw on SD
A bunch of bad hype videos

There were a couple of decent makeshift midcarder tag matches but yeah.

Keep in mind I actually stopped watching before the last segment so if that was amazing then cool I guess but I'm kinda doubting it was given no response in here.

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No problem!
This is a cute and pop genocide of love!

Ricardo is the best thing ever. And Del Rio hiring illegal Canadians

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We are thought, and reality, and concept, and the unimaginable

Ricardo was actually kinda funny and he was surprisingly competent in the ring as far as taking hits goes but the match still wasn't any good

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No problem!
This is a cute and pop genocide of love!

Lopen posted...
Ricardo was actually kinda funny and he was surprisingly competent in the ring as far as taking hits goes but the match still wasn't any good

ricardo is actually a wrestler and knows how to wrestle soooo

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bad advice
http://img.imgcake.com/viktorpnges.png

That does explain it yeah.

Still though he got no real offense off so the match still wasn't very good.

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No problem!
This is a cute and pop genocide of love!

RAW WAS AMAZING!!!!! love it live!

I was on camera so much fist pumping all night with my bros and the ladies. Top left of the screen most of the night

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Not changing this sig until the Bengals, Bills and Lions win the Super Bowl (10/10/10)
The most American Canadian on Board 8 - #9 Bro on Board 8

ninja please hell no

too damn good

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PotD's OFFICIAL King of Games!
The Choco. The Cream of Yuna Fanboyism.

From: Lopen | #118
Ricardo was actually kinda funny and he was surprisingly competent in the ring as far as taking hits goes but the match still wasn't any good

Ricardo is awesome. Outside of in-ring stuff (which he obviously hasn't had much reason to do) I find him a hell of a lot more entertaining than Del Rio.

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Mistake you're making - overlooking the fact that we might not want to be saved.

my dvr didn't record raw tonight for some reason

did i miss anything

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http://img20.imageshack.us/img20/6782/timj1.png

Del Rio is a victim of the "I have a catch phrase" problem that a lot (well, Miz, at least) of WWE guys have these days. He spends wayyyy too much time talking about destiny and "MY NAMMMMEEEEE..." and crap.

His early stuff was better.

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No problem!
This is a cute and pop genocide of love!

Yeah that was the worst Raw since The Rock's birthday one, I think.

Punk/HHH was pretty good, though, but I felt there were a lot of things left unsaid.

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http://www.gifsoup.com/view/345927/omg-cat-danny-rose-o.gif

So, Kelly vs. Vickie for Worst Match of the Year so far?

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"Go get me Jared...from Subway!" -- CM Punk
30 Days Remaining ... that Black Turtle, Guru champion has my sig.

Well it was mercifully short so I wouldn't be so quick to say that. That being said in spite of it being so short it still had like 3 botches and it didn't even have the satisfaction of vickie getting beat up.

So it's possible. I'd need a list of candidates though.

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No problem!
This is a cute and pop genocide of love!

Well, WWE Worst Match possibly. I just remembered Victory Road 2011. That PPV will probably make up the Top 3 alone.

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"Go get me Jared...from Subway!" -- CM Punk
30 Days Remaining ... that Black Turtle, Guru champion has my sig.

TimJab posted...
my dvr didn't record raw tonight for some reason

did i miss anything

Nope. Raw was bad tonight. Really bad.

You missed Ricardo being great, and Del Rio going on about hiring illegal Canadians to work on his house

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We are thought, and reality, and concept, and the unimaginable

oh hey Sting and AJ Styles on xplosion.

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Vote for this guy in every contest: ZFS

Yeah this week was a purge induced bye week because I was too busy to try and reconstruct everything and didnt check here first.

My bad dudes.

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http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/8-gamefaqs-contests

the new topic we'll discuss what to do from here there.

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great link bro

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~Tommeri Uranius Bombaldi the Fourth, esq.
(aka not Krakenprophet)

I'm going to get all philosophical because there's not much else to talk about.

The problem with pro wrestling (the WWE in particular) as a "morality play" as some call it is that it is a horrible example of protagonist-centered morality. The actions of the designated "hero" are all good, the actions of the designated "villain" are all bad, even when those actions are the same thing. The fact that motivation and character are seen as irrelevant while only your face/heel alignment determines whether your actions are just or cruel essentially prevents there from being any real sense of moral superiority for either side. I think this is part of why the Christian/Orton story bugged me so much - when you get down to it, even if it weren't such complete character derailment for Christian, he was only ever "wrong" because he was the heel, and his opponents were only ever "right" because they were faces (especially notable whenever Teddy Long screwed with him). That makes it very hard to see much of a "good triumphs over evil" resolution.

Hooray for over-thinking things.

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We clasped our hands, our hands in praise of a conquerors right to tyranny

Look you want to talk about the crazy morality of wrestling lets review some examples from the last year:

A Woman's ex-husband shows up and starts harassing her while she moves on with her life, her new boyfriend stands up for her and thetwo men get into a fight. The ex-husband was the face.

A man who haseverything and has recently reconnected with his father is psychologically tortured by another man who kidnaps his father, callously mocks the man, and then tricks him into murdering his own father. The first man was the heel.

For some non-Edge examples-

One man is brutally and randomly assaulted by another man , including punting his head and putting him in the hospital for a time. The first man comes back from his injury and tries to get back at the other man for what he did to him. The first man was the heel.

One man brutally mocks a man's girlfriends. The second man fights back-- this is practically every scene involving Vickie during her and Dolph's relationship.

Heres one thats current-

Two guys go through an ordeal and end up with only each other and become bros in the process. The two are mocked weekly by another and is aided by outside guns to destroy the two when they dared to say anything about it.

The one mocking them is face.

Its pretty absurd.

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http://img.imgcake.com/nio/81edpngej.png

Yeah, I wasn't even thinking of the insanity of that Edge/Kane story when I made that post. Wrestling morality is ****ed up hard <_<

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Mistake you're making - overlooking the fact that we might not want to be saved.

Well with all the Vickie stuff it's because Vickie's an ass and continues to be an ass at every opportunity.

Like I see the other stuff being backwards but Vickie is kind of an exception.

But yeah it's pretty messed up in general. Most of those storylines bugged me in fact for that reason.

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No problem!
This is a cute and pop genocide of love!

The Vickie stuff kind of swings wildly around the line of appropriate and not appropriate. Like usually she's a ***** so it's not a problem for someone to be a jackass to her, but then there's times where she goes a while without really doing anything and then someone that's never even interacted with her before decides to devote ten minutes to making fat jokes about her and then it's bad when Dolph gets pissed at them for it and it all feels a little weird.

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We clasped our hands, our hands in praise of a conquerors right to tyranny

And yeah I realize that saying "it's been a while since she's done anything" is a bit strange when the passage of a month or two shouldn't really be enough time but the extreme short-term memory in the wrestling world is something I think is fairly necessary just to make it plausible that anyone could ever see anyone else on the roster without hating them, so I'm okay with accepting the idea that if it didn't happen recently and isn't part of the current storyline, it's probably not too big a deal.

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We clasped our hands, our hands in praise of a conquerors right to tyranny

From: edwardsdv | #137
A Woman's ex-husband shows up and starts harassing her while she moves on with her life, her new boyfriend stands up for her and thetwo men get into a fight. The ex-husband was the face.

i feel bad that before you mentioned this was an edge angle i thought you were talking about the whole angle/jarrett thing. which is weird since i haven't watched tna since before it happened.

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"Oh God, maplejet's trying to be cool again. I'll call the ambulance." - Wylvane

i thought he was talking about angle/jarrett too

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http://images.memegenerator.net/instances/500x/9521708.jpg

Official Predix:

Nash and Laurinitis worked out a deal. Nash gonna interfere in the Punk/HHH match causing HHH to lose. Laurinitis then assumes power, and re-hires Nash. Hilarity and low ratings ensue.

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SmartMuffin - Because anything less would be uncivilized
http://img.imgcake.com/gadsdenflaggifda.gif

Smackdown spoilers this week sound hilarious

NXT this week was the best. All hail Michael Cole.

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GREEN RANGER
http://img18.imageshack.us/img18/4548/signaturedi.jpg

please tell me nxt redemption isn't still going

it isn't possible

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last thursday was the 6 month mark

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From: SmartMuffin | #144
Official Predix:

Nash and Laurinitis worked out a deal. Nash gonna interfere in the Punk/HHH match causing HHH to lose. Laurinitis then assumes power, and re-hires Nash. Hilarity and low ratings ensue.

See, I'm trying to figure out something like this, but the interference causes HHH to win and somehow Nash gets his job back because I feel like betting on HHH to lose his "first match back since Wrestlemania", especially when it's been like 18 months since he's won a match, is a fool's game.

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Mistake you're making - overlooking the fact that we might not want to be saved.

because I feel like betting on HHH to lose his "first match back since Wrestlemania", especially when it's been like 18 months since he's won a match, is a fool's game.

Well, how about "he loses on a technicality, then goes nuts and ends up standing victorious having knocked out everyone involved with his sledgehammer"

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SmartMuffin - Because anything less would be uncivilized
http://img.imgcake.com/gadsdenflaggifda.gif