Board 8 > Anagram ranks anything Mario-related

(+) Yeah! (+)

Mario Pissing

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sYqMeT5aPRU&rco=1

Super Mario Bros.

Watch for Rolling Rocks - 0.5x A Presses (Commentated)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpk2tdsPh0A

All that said and it's still only on the third lowest tier. Lol.

Pauline

The Wizard

The Dire Dire Docks theme
https://youtu.be/RRfHbyCQDCo?si=rsirkXU96BKAXu6N

Dennis Hopper

Mouser

Anagram posted...

Veto
Wall Kicks Will Work: I have no idea what you meant by this. I googled it and got completely unremarkable Mario 64 guide videos. Give me a specific video to watch, I guess is what I mean.

I'm guessing they meant the star in general.

Toadette

Piranha Plant being a character in Smash Bros

Super Paper Mario

Anagram posted...

Wall Kicks Will Work: I have no idea what you meant by this. I googled it and got completely unremarkable Mario 64 guide videos. Give me a specific video to watch, I guess is what I mean.

It's the name of a star in Mario 64...

Fawful

Petey Piranha

Bitto posted...

Mushroomy Kingdom (Brawl stage)

Just quoting this so it gets ranked for next time.

The 'bah' sound in NSMB music

Luigi Wins Without Doing Anything

Casio Mario World's soundtrack other than Casio Hellburst is SNES-ized renditions of trippy, ambient non-vgm. Pretty neat!

Another song: Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island - Koopa (or Bowser if you really want):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_nCwZVX5qY

Anagram posted...

if you're going to make a villain who parodies femininity, you need to go full-blast

Valentina

L is Real 2401

Count Bleck

the steak boss fight

Dong Dong Never Die

Those trivia flash cards where Mario is praying with a Koran and Luigi is a Confederate soldier and Bowser owns the buses that Rosa Parks got arrested on

- Cape Feather Tier
Mario Kart (Series)

- Kuribo's Shoe Tier
Rosalina
Luigi Wins Without Doing Anything: Probably the best Mario meme. It parodies how much luck is involved in Mario Party minigames, it parodies tryhards, it parodies crappy AI, and it involves zero effort or skill at all. Luigi was the correct choice for this, too. "Yoshi wins by doing nothing" isn't nearly as funny. This has to do with Luigi always being #2, so for him to be #1 not by his amazing skill or anything, but instead simply due to others' incompetence, is automatically funny.
Kuribo's Shoe
Super Paper Mario: God, remember when Paper Mario was good? Remember when this came out, and everyone said it was the worst one? Now people look back on this game as the good old days, like when RE6 came out and suddenly everyone loved RE5. Yeah, the first two are better, and yeah, I don't know if turning this into a half-platformer instead of full RPG was a good idea, and yeah, it does kind of look and feel cheaper than the first two... but you get to play as the core four on a wacky adventure, and the humor is still there, so who cares? I remember playing this and being kind of shocked that Luigi is the final boss, simply because it meant that you couldn't play as him during the fight. And yeah, you know, I'm on board with the fan theory that the fourth game should have had Mario as the final boss, since the first three are Bowser, Peach, and Luigi. Like yes, the actual game is not as good as TYD, but all of the elements that make TYD so good are still here, just not quite as perfectly-executed. Like really, the Mario RPGs are so amazing partly because they're allowed to do weird stuff and shine a light on how little anything in this series makes sense, like having a completely nonsensical silly world played semi-straight in a JRPG context, and SPM still nails that part, so even if it's the weakest of the good three, it's still a really solid entry into the Mario canon.
1-1 Theme
Count Bleck: See, why can't Paper Mario have characters like this anymore? By that, I mean fun and interesting characters. He's just a weird shadow man who's a high-class nobleman and also a magician I guess, why not. This is how you do a one-game antagonist; he comes in, establishes that he'll be the villain instead of Bowser, has a bunch of fun scenes, and then exits so the real villain can take over. He even manages to have a short romantic subplot with his secretary. Like, it's amazing how simplistic his design is, and the design for all of his minions, just basic shapes slapped together and given some gradients, but it really works in a way that, say, a giant realistic fan does not. He reminds me a little of Vaati, another character who shows up for only one game (at least in his human form, the one that matters), but also manages to be super memorable and beloved. In a way, Count Bleck is lucky. He's one of the few characters who leaves on a high note, and never completely embarrasses himself in some later crappy game. Like, honestly, if you want to include another character in Mario Kart, use this guy instead of Baby Rosalina.
Bowsette
Luigi
Bayonetta Nintendo Content
Thwomp
Hammer Bros.
Super Mario Maker 2
Hexagon Heat

- Hammer Suit Tier
Paratroopas
Dire Dire Docks (Theme): Unlike the other themes people have nominated, this one actually does feel water-y. I actually do get the impression of this being some kind of swimming level just based on the sounds, and for that alone, it scores some points. But it's also just a nice little tune. Not very energetic, it feels very "take your time-y," but some stages are like that. Overall, great.
Dr. Goomba Tower
Chris Pratt
SupperMarioBroth
Super Mario Bros.: THE video game, by which all others are judged. If you say the word "video game" to people who don't play video games, they think of this, Pac-Man, or Tetris. Maybe Mario Kart or Pokemon, if they're a little younger. Even my mom has played SMB1. Even my DAD, who doesn't know any video game except Galaga, has played SMB1. You can go onto youtube and type in "tribal person plays SMB1 for the first time" and see tribal guys being only moderately surprised, because even THEY knew about this game before seeing it for the first time in their lives. This game has ascended past being just THE video game and entered like our collective unconsciousness. And it's easy to see why it changed everything, of course. It's just better than every game before it. The only possible contender is Tetris, don't talk to me about Duck Hunt or Excitebike or whatever other crap. Dig Dug? Q-Bert? Elevator Action? Pac-Man? Get out of here. The absolute only pre-1984 game that operates on SMB's level is Tetris. The nearest equivalent I can think of is Pokemon, in that it's a game that just completely outmodes everything that comes before it. There isn't a single pre-1998 GB game worth mentioning in the same sentence as Pokemon, again with the exception of Tetris, and I'm sorry, Link's Awakening lovers, but it's true. I'm not going to pretend that SMB is the best game ever, it's not even the best Mario game on the NES, but it absolutely trounces anything that came before it to an embarrassing degree. Oh, I need to talk about the game itself? ... It's pretty good, by modern standards. Still fun. Can you imagine if Mario had taken the same route as Sonic, and doubled-down on deep lore and complex characterization? If Wario was some black-suited edgelord, and every game was about going to an alternate dimension where Mario doesn't talk, because they realized they made a mistake in the late 90s with Sonic Adventure, but don't want to retcon most of the series' history?
Beep Block Skyway
Hell Valley Sky Trees
Valentina: As a kid, I remember stumbling onto a "level 3 challenge" guide on GameFAQs for Mario RPG. I decided to try it, and I got to the fight with Valentina and Dodo before giving up. It is completely insane that this is technically a real Mario character. Unquestionably, she's the most sexualized any Mario character has ever been. It's not just her huge boobs and tiny waist, or the way she waves both around in her standing animation, it's the fact that her dress exposes her entire legs, it's the Betty Boop animations... The only that makes her look Mario-y is that instead of hair, she has a bird on her head. This is how you do an evil femme fatale in a Mario context, this is how you design her to emphasize her femaleness in a way that's still cartoony and silly. The design logic behind her is clearly so much stronger than Birdo or the Koopalings, even if she doesn't fit into the mainline games.
Smash 64 Commercial
Pirahna Plant (Smash Bros): The ultimate Smash shitpost. No one wanted this. Sakurai gave us the hero we deserved, and the hero we needed. It's so stupid in every way, like a parody of characters people actually asked for and wanted. And what really makes it work is how it's not really even a character. It's the only Smash character who's just a random enemy minion. It's different from having a Waddle Dee or a Moblin character only in that Piranha Plants are more famous, and a plant running around is more hilarious. It's even better than choosing a random pokemon, like Furret, because at least someone out there loves Furret, and Furret is a creature. The Pirahna Plant is just a plant.
Fawful: I have no idea how his dialogue reads in Japan, but translating him to speak in Engrish was a great idea. It's not hard to see why this character struck a chord with fans in a way that no one else in SSS did. He looks weird, his dialogue is fun to read, and he actually serves a useful purpose in the story of the game. He completely mogs all of the other 'non-main villain' bosses in the series. Like, imagine if instead of Fawful, the villains were just the Koopalings again. I don't know why the Mario RPGs are the one place where the series is allowed to try weird stuff, but I'll take it. And unlike Paper Mario, no one ever stepped in to completely ruin them, which is also nice.

- Super Mushroom Tier
Staff Roll Theme (Mario 64)
Super Mario Strikers (2005): Is this the craziest and riskiest thing Mario has done with its aesthetics ever? The only thing I can think of that compares is Paper Mario, but even that somehow seems less radical. The hard lines, the intense expressions, the... everything, really. It's all still recognizably Mario, but there's a crazitude to it that the series otherwise never has. I don't understand why a soccer spinoff of all things became the experiment, because it's not as if Nintendo ever does this with its other spinoffs. Nerd that I was in high school, I remember in 2006 making a fan moveset for Waluigi in Smash that involved his Up-B being based on the 'swimming in air' animation he does in this game. And it really goes to show how much aesthetics matter, because no one remembers or talks about this game for absolutely anything except how they moderately changed the look of the characters. They took precisely one risk, and it's way more memorable than, say, Mario Kart Double Dash, which was surely a million times more popular, yet hardly anyone talks about it anymore.
Shellcreeper
Hide and Seek mods
Bowser Theme (Super Mario World 2): Completely fine.
Puzzle Plank Galaxy (Theme)
Bah (NSMB Music): I had to look this up. I mean, it's fine. It sounds very Mario-y. I definitely get why they used it. Is this really exclusive to NSMB? I feel like it's way older than that.
Starman
Donkey Kong (1981)
Mushroomy Kingdom: The idea of 1-1 being abandoned after years and falling to ruin is--wait a second, when Brawl come out? 2008? When did MGS4 come out? Also 2008? I was going to accuse one of stealing the other's idea, but I guess not. Anyway, this is a fantastic concept for a stage, and if you're going to do deep lore shenanigans with Mario of all things, this is how you should do it. It's almost too clever for Brawl, given some of the terrible ideas in that game. I like how the Smash Wiki has an entire section about tournament legality for every stage, as if fan tournaments have any bearing on the games themselves.
Rainbow Road (Fat Bearded Guy Song)
Gust Garden Galaxy (Theme)
Tonkachi Mario
Talking Flowers
Trials of Death
Dennis Hopper: I always wonder what actors who were in real movies think when they're in genre trash. I remember watching Dracula Untold or whatever that movie's name is, and Charles Dance plays a spooky vampire who looks directly at the camera, and wondering what he's thinking in each moment he's on-screen. Hopper is a completely fine actor, but no one on Earth could have saved his role. He plays--"President" Koopa? God, you can't even get the title of royalty right. It's like the Final Fantasy movie where one of the major characters is "Dr. Sid." That the live action Mario movie exists for real is completely insane. At least he made out better than Raul Julia, poor guy.
Anya Taylor-Joy
I'm a Chuckster
Kublai Khan
Tetris Attack
Toaster
Backwards Long Jump
Mouser: Oh yeah, these things. See, this is what I was talking about with paratroopas. Mouser isn't a koopa with sunglasses or whatever, he's just a mouse who throws bombs at you. If this game wasn't just a reskin of an unrelated game, then Mouser would surely be a big Goomba who spits bombs at you or something like that. That said, Mouser is still just a big mouse who throws bombs and has sunglasses, so he's not going to place very highly. It's strange how the only enemies in that game who stuck around are shy guys of all things. I want to talk more about shy guys now, but since this is limited exclusively to Mouser, I don't know. It's not a very interesting design.

- Frog Suit Tier
Wall Kicks Will Work (Star): Okay, I watched someone getting this star. It is... completely unremarkable? It's kind of neat to go around the back of the stage to a place you otherwise basically never go, it kind of makes things feel secret for a second. A level where you have to use wall kicks to ascend is good, it utilizes an option that many seven year-olds aren't going to be good at, but... I don't know, of all stars, why nominate this one? I don't understand.
Lou Albano
Practice Makes Perfect (Legacy X)
Blindfolded Mario Maker Guy
Dong Dong Never Die: So, this is just a fan game Street Fighter parody that includes Mario, but gameplay-wise, he's just Akuma? Yeah, okay.
Mario Bros.
Pauline: Possibly the most nothing Mario character of them all, and that's saying something. All she's got is that she was in the first game, and she sings the song in Odyssey. It's almost a little weird how rarely she's used, too. The Mario spinoffs always are looking for more characters to throw into things, and Pauline almost never shows up. Most of her appearances are in games where Donkey Kong also appears. I guess she was in Mario Tennis Aces, a game I've never played, and the gacha Mario Kart game. Oh, she's in Mario Kart 8 Deluxe as DLC? I didn't realize. It's like, it's almost kind of interesting that they had so little for Pauline to do, that they made her the mayor of a city. They could've easily said that she was the princess of whatever land, the way they did Daisy, but they instead modeled a fake New York City and made her the mayor for some reason. It's so at odds with the rest of the Mario universe. I guess I could talk about how Pauline establishes a precedent of damsels in distress that video games followed for decades, but I know no one really cares. She's just... the least interesting and memorable human Mario character. A complex asterisk. "Did you know that Peach isn't the girl in Donkey Kong?" That's Pauline's legacy as a character.
Stanley the Bugman
Torpedo Ted
Mario vs Sonic at the Olympic Games
L is Real 2401: Possibly the stupidest video game rumor to get as big as it did. It's too bad the internet ruined video game playground gossip. There'll never be another "Mew is under the truck" ever again, I feel like we lost a bit of the mystery of games now. The text on the statue doesn't even look like "L is real 2401." The Wiki says it says "Eternal Star," but it doesn't even look like that. It just looks like garbled-up super compressed JPEG text.
WarioWare
Grandpa Mario (Serving Tray)
Lakilester
Steak (Boss Fight): I haven't even played Color Splash, but I knew from legend that the boss fights are just real world items modeled into the game, and guessed correctly that this would be one. How lame and bad. "People enjoyed the first three Paper Marios, it must be just because of the paper aesthetic. Remove all other aspects besides that, and replace them with their non-union Mexican equivalents." Looking it up, I see most of the boss fights are actually the Koopalings, gross. See, I wouldn't mind if there was ONE distractingly real-world boss fight with a normal object. If you're fighting all kinds of wacky Mario enemies like a gold Bob-omb or whatever, and then just a watch appears and you have to wail on it while it just sits there being a watch. That could be funny. But that's not what happened. Instead, you have to prepare the steak to be cooked while it attacks you. God, does anyone like the latter two Paper Mario games?
NBA Street V3
Mario Paint
Yoshi's Safari
Racist Mario
Fat Yoshi
Thunder Cloud (Mario Kart)
LUEshi
Casio Hellburst
Donkey Kong Jr. (1982)
Special Mariko Broken (Sket Dance Chapter 91/Episode 39)

- Poison Mushroom Tier
Mario Kart Tour
Mario Teaches Typing
Watch for Rolling Rocks (0.5x A Presses): For you, para, I watched this entire video, even though I'm sure you just chose the most technically complicated Mario video you could find. The half-A press stuff I found to be extremely uninteresting, but the part about Scuttlebug homes updating as they hit you was mildly neat. The gate ceiling stuff is boring, though the idea of building up speed for 12 hours if funny. The PU stuff is boring. Slope sinking speed? Die. I don't know how this has 4.9 million views.
Luigi Meeting Himself
Super Hornio Brothers
Toadette: In a way, Toadette is Toad's Wario. The Watoad, if you will. She is a character defined exclusively by her relation to and how she altered an existing character into a new one. But where Wario actually has a distinct personality and is a very different person from Mario, Toadette is still Toad, but now a girl. Is that thing about Toads not having gender canon? Because that just raises even more questions. It's like, at least Toadsworth has a moderately interesting design and uses a color that's not generally used in Mario's color scheme. Toadette is literally just female Toad. I think the best usage of her was in the Mario Parties where she sells you the star, because at least they recognized that no one on Earth wants to play as freaking Toadette. I mean, her femaleness is defined solely by her pigtails and pink color scheme. She doesn't even have eyelashes or lipstick, the main ways you establish a cartoon character is a girl!
Pink Gold Peach
Pachinko Game (SMS)
Yakuman DS
Big Bertha x Mario (Mario Comics)
Wendy O. Koopa
Hotel Mario Cutscenes
Petey Piranha: Does anyone actually like Petey Pirahna? I know everyone tolerates him, but does anyone actually like him? He's gross, he's ugly, he's stupid, and his only contribution to the series is just to be a big boss for you to beat up. According to the Wiki, he's the leader of the Pirahna Plants, and I'll level with you, I didn't realize they even had the capacity to appoint a leader. They don't even really feel like Bowser's minions. They're just evil plants who try to bite you when you pass over their pipes. That's all they have going for them. What are even his duties as their leader? Is he the one responsible for allying with Bowser, the guy who always loses? I don't know, man, I disliked this thing in 2002, and I don't think I've ever played as him in any of the spinoff games. I remember him being a boss in Smash, where you have to choose between saving Peach or Zelda. That's probably the best usage of him ever.
Mario Galaxy 2 Glitch

- Blue Shell Tier
Mario Pissing: "7 years ago." That was 2017. God, I'm old. How does this have over a million views? This is aggressively not funny. Although, I'll admit that I generally dislike urine humor anyway.
Birdo

- Veto
The Wizard: I've never seen it! All I know is that the kid loves the power glove because it's so bad.

Paper Mario: Sticker Star

Glitzville

Jim Carrey as Wario in SMB2 (not confirmed or even speculated upon, just my own personal casting choice)

Super Mario Bros. The Lost Levels

KateMarsh posted...

Jim Carrey as Wario in SMB2 (not confirmed or even speculated upon, just my own personal casting choice)

If the guy who played Kevin Butler in the PlayStation commercials had a non-compete agreement to not appear in any other video game-related commercials, I guarantee Jim Carrey has similar for game-related movies

WazzupGenius00 posted...

If the guy who played Kevin Butler in the PlayStation commercials had a non-compete agreement to not appear in any other video game-related commercials, I guarantee Jim Carrey has similar for game-related movies

I'm sure he does. Never stopped anyone from making a dream pick before.

Mario Lemieux

Triple Jump

Yoshi Kid (TTYD Partner)

Bowser's Big Blast

WazzupGenius00 posted...

If the guy who played Kevin Butler in the PlayStation commercials had a non-compete agreement to not appear in any other video game-related commercials, I guarantee Jim Carrey has similar for game-related movies

i dunno if they can actually put limits on Jim Carrey, hes not random Kevin Butler guy. The studio just backs up a truck of money to Jims house and says please be the star of our film, no stipulations

Cape Feather

Charles Martinet

Super Mario World 2: Yoshis Island

Mario vs. Crono (GameFAQs Character Battles)

Do The Mario

Dr. Mario - Chill
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXOZRsUXVuw

Wreck it Ralph, which I assume would be allowed because of the cameo appearances + references. If not, just rate those aspects of the film.

Getting hit by multiple blue shells while in 1st place and about to cross the finish line and ending up 8th or worse

Coins (Mario Kart)

Racist Mario being above Mario Pissing is a travesty

Jump Rope Challenge (Super Mario Odyssey)