Lurker > VanananaHeyHey

LurkerFAQs, Active DB, DB1, DB2, DB3, DB4, DB5, DB6, DB7, DB8, Database 9 ( 09.28.2021-02-17-2022 ), DB10, DB11, DB12, Clear
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TopicWhy do people wear their phones in their butt pocket?
VanananaHeyHey
01/26/22 10:21:19 AM
#41
mustachedmystic posted...
Bullshit. It's because that's what women buy.
They buy it because that's all there is to buy. Sweatpants and t-shirts aren't professional wear. If a woman want any kind of respectable clothing, she can only buy the diaphanous mock-suit jackets and tight pants. Buying baggier things will either be frumpy or just will literally not fit.

Gender ain't liberating; it's constraining. You can't pretend that a whole population being told since infancy that "women look like this!" has nothing to do with the fact that the stereotypes are purposefully perpetuated by people who think "women look like this!" when making clothes, or when people diminish the intellect/presentability of a woman because she fails to wear the "women look like this!" clothes.

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TopicWhy do people wear their phones in their butt pocket?
VanananaHeyHey
01/26/22 10:01:07 AM
#37
mustachedmystic posted...
From what I've always heard, functional pockets alter the way the clothes look when worn, and form trumps function in woman's fashion. But I guess it makes much more sense that it's a diabolical plot to keep women subservient. /s

"Form over function" being the primary value of women's clothing *is* oppressive subservience, because it directly feeds into the notion that women are decorative. The only reason "form" doesn't take functionality into account is because women are seen as existing only to be pretty. High-end clothing for men manages to have pockets that fit more than an aspirin and the only reason they're given more spacious clothing is because men are seen as actors who need to do things, opposed to women's clothing which is tight, thin and constricting --- there is nothing biological demanding that; it's all sexism.

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TopicChristians hate other religions more than atheists do, claims researchers
VanananaHeyHey
01/26/22 9:10:30 AM
#14
No surprise. My ex grew up in a cult (Moonies) and said that "secular humanists" were more demonized and used as a rhetorical menace than "liberals," "Democrats" or even "homosexuals." After leaving the cult, it was astounding to discover that "secular humanism" is not at all a common ethos (or even phrase) outside of those types of religious circles. Like, the impression was that newscasters, daytime talkshow hosts, etc. would all be pounding "secular humanism" by name during their airtime.

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TopicThey made me, a man, stock the feminine hygiene products
VanananaHeyHey
01/12/22 8:52:19 AM
#8
Mezcla posted...
what do the wings do!?
The wings are flaps with weak adhesive that wrap around the underside of the underwear to keep the pad in place.

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TopicIve been working in food for 4 months without a food handlers license, ama
VanananaHeyHey
12/20/21 9:07:28 AM
#20
I had a food handling license and a liquor serving license in WA. They were both online tests that you just watch some videos and do some quizzes about. I think the food one was $10 and good for 1-3 years and the liquor was maybe $13 and good for about the same amount of time. It was the same as computerized workplace trainings or the Alcohol Awareness thing everyone had do to before freshman year of college.

Different states and types of venue have different laws and loopholes.

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TopicAnyone else get depressed when they see YouTube video upload dates?
VanananaHeyHey
12/09/21 1:55:50 AM
#6
Yeah. I remember wanting to make videos online and not getting into it, then it got big and I didn't have time, and now it's major and not intimate. I really loved how close the Internet felt in 2005ish, even though we were all so damn mean.

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TopicGay touchdown dance
VanananaHeyHey
10/24/21 2:48:04 PM
#3
Reminds me a bit of The Room's 'cheep cheep' dances.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ttKn1eGKTew

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TopicSex doll more popular with customers than real women at brothel
VanananaHeyHey
09/30/21 12:30:49 PM
#60
SoggyBottomBoy posted...
sex doll
Sex dolls take the entire likeness of a human and exist to create a violable mannequin that deliberately looks like a woman. It's not the same as a fleshlight. Vibrators are shafts that infrequently have any relation whatsoever to the human form.

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TopicSo they have colleges for homeopathic 'medicine'...
VanananaHeyHey
09/30/21 12:27:05 PM
#3
By exposing ourselves to only this video in small doses and no other information about the school, we're getting a more comprehensive and faithfully homeopathic education than attendees do.

Think about it.

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TopicMy mom just died and the funeral industry is pissin' me off.
VanananaHeyHey
09/23/21 6:47:22 PM
#40
ShotgunSilencer posted...
First, very sorry for your loss. That's horrible.
I heard cremains. I got pissed and said to him like... Are you making jokes right now? Are you fuckin serious??
My dad informed me that that's what it's called. I had never heard that term.
I apologized to the guy and told him I still think it's a stupid term.

Sorry for your loss, too. It sounds like we're 100% on the same page. It's just such a ridiculous fucking word. "Ashes" and "remains" are already words that don't sound like tryhard adorkability.

I looked up the origin and it only was recorded for the first time in 1947, so it's not like it's some ancient word. Even if it's "the word for what that is," I'd argue there didn't need to be a specific word for it. And, if specifying intentional human cremation remnants was absolutely necessary, surely we/the funeral industry could have created a word based on Latin for 'ash' and 'human' or something instead of making a portmanteau.

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TopicMy mom just died and the funeral industry is pissin' me off.
VanananaHeyHey
09/23/21 6:40:28 PM
#39
CE_gonna_CE posted...
Lost my mom about a month and a half ago

There was life insurance and my stepdad handled the arrangements so it wasnt super stressful at the time, but it can all be such a draining process.

Wow, I'm so sorry for your loss, too. I don't have too many decisions to make, but I'm definitely out of it. Like, I'm supposed to go back to work on Monday and I do nooooot want to.

kingdrake2 posted...
carefully emptied it into it since that's what my dad liked to do (go fishing) he caught a big salmon once while drunk.
That's really nice. Also that's funny as hell. Right on! My mom liked the the beach. My dad wants some of her ashes buried because visiting gravesites is important to him, but he's going to dole out some of them to be sprinkled around elsewhere.

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TopicMy mom just died and the funeral industry is pissin' me off.
VanananaHeyHey
09/23/21 6:03:11 PM
#35
Jiek_Fafn posted...
Condolences, man.
Lost my mom a few years back, but thankfully my dad was a veteran so she went to a veterans memorial graveyard. Because of this her options were super limited, which made things much easier. It's a rough situation and having to make decisions is terrible while in that mindset.

My dad actually reacted pretty well, all things considered. We just took turns making sure that he ate properly and stuff. He's retired and thankfully plays some online game with daily tasks and shit for the last decade. He leaned into the structure of it until he started doing better mentally. It's weird that of all things, that's probably what helped him most. Maybe yours might be able to distract himself with something oriented for him.
I'm thankful my parents took care of most of the arrangements a few years ago, but something always comes up. Years ago, they preplanned on and prepaid a one-day viewing with a casket rental, then cremation (viewings are important for Boomers), but because of the accident, she had to be cremated immediately. Now the funeral parlor is giving us grief over trying to get a refund for that prepaid rental we won't be able to use. Lots of love to you and your family.

dj1200 posted...
Sorry to hear, TC

Wetterdew posted...
I'm gonna donate my body to science specifically so that my family doesn't have to pay for a burial or cremation.
Yeah, that's legit. They give your family back the ashes afterwards, so I definitely get the appeal of that. I'd probably do it, too. My parents are both organ donors, but I don't think my mom had anything that could be used at this point; she had ailments unrelated to how she died.

KogaSteelfang posted...
Sorry for your loss.
Thank you very much. I'm going to try to get my Dad out of the house tomorrow. Today was one week since the accident, so he's been at home the whole time except for one time the same day when he went out for a grocery order she had made before dying.

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TopicMy mom just died and the funeral industry is pissin' me off.
VanananaHeyHey
09/22/21 8:28:16 PM
#24
itachi15243 posted...
the death certificate was a bit late and just all sort of shit was fucked up about it.
I'm so sorry! That's ghastly! I am hugging you and wishing you and your family as much comfort as can be had. We had to delay the announcement by almost a week because the churchyard where she wanted her urn interred wouldn't answer their e-mail even though they sold the last plot there in 1985, so it's not like they have anything else going on.
radical rhino posted...
Thought this was gonna be about the marked up prices for everything related to the funeral/corpse disposal.
Why not both? The funeral parlor tried to upsell us on something for the gravesite that (1) the funeral parlor doesn't even sell and (2) the cemetery doesn't even require or want.
Lil_Bit83 posted...
I'm sorry for your loss.

MegaTech posted...
My condolences vanai
Thanks, guys. It was/is absolute unfathomable madness. It's not like she was a lumberjack. It was so freaky and immediate.

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TopicMy mom just died and the funeral industry is pissin' me off.
VanananaHeyHey
09/22/21 4:55:51 PM
#19
bigblu89 posted...
And same. I didn't know they were called "cremains" until we had my dad cremated last year.
Buh. I'm sorry about your dad. The term just feels icky. How are you doing? Any tips for my dad, since you had to help your mom?
monkmith posted...
there were no refunds
Horrible. I'm so very, very sorry that you and your family had to deal with that. I hope there's been some peace in the intervening year. That is so deeply unforgivable of them. I don't understand how they can justify not giving refunds; proof of resurrection would surely not be enough to put them out of business short-term.
Pandamonic posted...
I'm sorry for your loss TC :(
Thank you. <3
_BlueMonk posted...
dont go :(
Right? Absolutely hard agree. I always sort of conceptualized "losing my parents" as a unit, both at once, a before/after kind of thing. But helping my Dad is devastating. I can be steely or whatever for myself, but watching this paragon of strength and excellence weep is... It's hell.

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TopicMy mom just died and the funeral industry is pissin' me off.
VanananaHeyHey
09/22/21 4:33:10 PM
#14
Arcanine2009 posted...
Sorry for your loss TC. I know how it feels. dad passed away 6 months ago from cancer and it still feels unreal. Life is precious. and short. Hold on to the ones that are there for you and have good memories with them. But be the best you can be too and not get too hung up on the could and would haves..

I'm sure you will get this sorted out with the funeral arrangements
Thank you so much. I'm sorry about your loss, too. I hope you're finding peace and centeredness, as to your family. Thankfully, my parents paid for and arranged most of this in 2017 when they were in their late 60s. My mom even sent me a text that said "We did the adulting thing!" after they finished their paperwork which was adorable for an oldster. So all I've really had to do is select pictures, buy flowers, pick up ashes, hold my sad father, etc. I'm so thankful that I don't have to pick out an urn or anything --- there are so many traumatized, horrified people getting bilked for lots of money.

AldousIsDead posted...
Cremains doesn't bug me, but in-urn-ment sure as shit does.
Like "interment" already means in + terra [Earth]. "Internment" means something wildly different, so it's not even an effective pun. If anything, which it doesn't need, "in-urn-ment" would be when you put the ashes into the urn, not when you put the urn into the Earth. "Cremains," I would say if I were in the industry, but I don't think I could ever bring myself to be so clueless as to say it in front of mourners.

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TopicMy mom just died and the funeral industry is pissin' me off.
VanananaHeyHey
09/22/21 4:26:56 PM
#12
Scotty_Rogers posted...
Sorry for your loss, man. Stay strong.
Thank you. My Dad had to see her after the accident before the EMTs could put on a sheet or anything. He's so broken up.
g0ldie posted...
I almost didn't reply because like you said, those terms are ridiculous, and I wasn't 100% sure if this was a real topic.
Dude, I don't blame you. It feels so unreal. My mom died like a cartoon coyote --- a perfectly healthy treetop fell on her on a sunny day, with no wind as she was finishing up an exercise session to make herself healthier before an upcoming surgery. It has been so damn surreal. My dad is so deeply, profoundly sad. He's so kind, like if Mr. Rogers and Abe Lincoln had a baby. The only times I've seen him cry were when I got into grad school and when I got married. It is hell for us both. I wasn't very close with my mom (long story), but she wasn't wicked and she didn't deserve to die like this. She was actually working really, really hard to get healthier, which was impressive. She had been an obese, arthritic, diabetic, lazy, reckless and clumsy for so long that I never could have fathomed her going this way. She was with three other neighbors and they're all panicked and traumatized so hard. And my Dad my perfect, humane, devastated Dad wrote all of them sympathy cards yesterday.

ColdOne666 posted...
RIP Stay strong TC.
Thank you. She was an institution around the community and it just isn't real.

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TopicMy mom just died and the funeral industry is pissin' me off.
VanananaHeyHey
09/22/21 4:19:50 PM
#9
LordFarquad1312 posted...
Sorry for your loss TC.

Cocytus posted...
Very sorry for your loss.

Thank you both (and thanks to Buck) very much. I'm mostly sad for my dad. They were dating+married for 58 years.

BuckVanHammer posted...
nope, dont like that. guess I need to tell my partner to not put me in a fucking cremains container...
Right?! Like, just call them "remains" or the person's name or "the urn" or "ashes!" Talking about "burying Mom" is tough, but talking about "burying ashes" is actually removed enough that I think it would be a safe enough term to use instead of a damn pun.

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TopicMy mom just died and the funeral industry is pissin' me off.
VanananaHeyHey
09/22/21 4:13:48 PM
#3
BuckVanHammer posted...
no way, u srs?
Serious about both, I'm afraid. Mom's death was shocking and sudden, so it hasn't quite sunken in yet. The terms are also used all the time, even in the funeral home and by our friend who has recently lost someone else.

"Cremains" and "in-urn-ment" seem like a distasteful, cruel piece of late-cringe media la "Schitts Creek" or "The Office" about what one oughtn't do. But they totally say that shit. They've said it multiple times, over the phone and in person.

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TopicMy mom just died and the funeral industry is pissin' me off.
VanananaHeyHey
09/22/21 4:07:15 PM
#1
Apparently, according to my experience with genealogists and the sympathetic industrial complex, the official name for 'the ashes existing after intentional cremation' are "cremains" and 'the act of intering a receptacle of ashes into a gravesite' is called "in-urn-ment." It feels so deeply disrespectful to me.



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TopicPossible Plot Hole in The Cobra Kai? Spoilers
VanananaHeyHey
09/15/21 9:42:46 AM
#7
In some cases, asthma can be reduced or cured through exercise, especially in kids.

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TopicWell she died, because didn't want to wear a mask.
VanananaHeyHey
09/14/21 8:43:36 AM
#35
The anti-vaxxers are making her a martyr and beatifying her. This is going to be bad.

For all the moralizers: Why should we have to pretend to mourn her death? "Just say you're sad and move on." We didn't know her; the likelihood of her family seeing these comments is infinitesimal; she was a malignant actor in society who died because of and in service to false propaganda that will kill others; and she got to die the death she wanted. The virus she died of didn't die with her, so "she's dead, get over it" is an extremely bad take.

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TopicIt was very far from perfect, but God I miss this country before 9/11 happened.
VanananaHeyHey
09/05/21 2:36:14 PM
#74
ClunkerSlim posted...
Uh... I think that was just your school. Adults couldn't just wander around my high school in the 90s. We had resource officers then too.
My school was the same as his. Former students as old as 25 would come in and surprise a teacher sometimes, then we'd all get a five-minute informal lecture about how great the teacher was, then the former student and teacher would talk a little while us kids did a worksheet or something. And moms would come in with cupcakes on birthdays, unannounced. At least twice, a grandparent came in as a surprise to the kid (though that was probably cleared with the teacher beforehand). You might have to get a name tag at the office, but there was no pre-clearance or appointment making.

My two buddies and I tried going back to our first grade teacher after we graduated high school (2007) and the office wouldn't let us past the front desk. Refused us name tags, needed an appointment, couldn't make an appointment unless you were a legal guardian or had been pre-approved by a parent in writing, it was an unreasonable disruption of class time, don't seek them out at lunch or recess because it's a liability. It was actually a huge downer, because we all really loved our first grade teacher and had talked about visiting her "when we grew up" multiple times during K-12.

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TopicWill mask culture be permanent?
VanananaHeyHey
08/30/21 12:08:23 AM
#3
I might wear one lazily in the grocery store, concerts, etc. from October to January in the future. It's an all right prevention measure.

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TopicIf you had the choice, would you become a ghost?
VanananaHeyHey
08/28/21 10:57:32 PM
#7
It depends on how big my territory were. I'd rather be a county or town ghost than a haunted house ghost.

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TopicMe and my girlfriend got into an argument last night. Who was right?
VanananaHeyHey
08/27/21 4:01:15 PM
#22
Veggeta_MAX posted...
I see. I should wait for her but she shouldn't have to wait for me. That's great relationship advice.
He's saying that anyone old enough to be in a relationship should be able to sit ten minutes waiting, that you both need to keep each other posted and that neither of you has meaningful grounds to turn ten minute waits into fights. Whataboutism always eggs on fights.

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Topichey ce fellas, I snapped at a work mom today.
VanananaHeyHey
08/26/21 2:29:50 PM
#7
There's a franchise of charming Tinkerbell films wherein the characters rarely have to deal long-term with comedic destruction, or are vindicated by their chaos revealing important plot points.

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TopicI've just learned about /r/femaledatingstrategy
VanananaHeyHey
08/25/21 5:17:37 PM
#106
Damar posted...
So what you're saying is many of the posts in that sub are from incel men pretending to be caricatures of feminist women in order to make women look bad?
Because incels are well known for being able to sound like unhinged third wave feminists.
Most of them can barely string a sentence together.
None of those other subs excuse what's written on that sub.
Damn.
I'm saying that to the extent these are real, they're not representative of women nor of "feminists" and that Reddit allowing FDS while deleting second, third and fourth-wave spaces -- while rabidly anti-feminist like the porn boards also remain -- is a deliberate move to discredit and silence feminist activism and critique.

And that there are a lot of shitposts.

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TopicHow do I break up with someone I don't even want to be friends with? (blogfaqs)
VanananaHeyHey
08/25/21 9:51:21 AM
#10
AldousIsDead posted...
If you're concerned about her lying about her age, just walk away.
Do you think it's worth calling her out on it? It'd be really awkward and mean of me if she is just a 27 year-old who failed to launch.

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TopicHow do I break up with someone I don't even want to be friends with? (blogfaqs)
VanananaHeyHey
08/25/21 9:47:10 AM
#7
One_Day_Remains posted...
...Age isn't remotely indicative of what degree you'd have. Was on board with you until you said this dumb shit.

I'm not saying it is, but the fact that she is listed as going to a certain school, but when I ask what she's studying, she demures that she's "going back to school for game design in Fall" but can't describe any past or current classes, it indicates that she is lying about going to school at all and that she's making up an age, since someone aged 27 would at least be able to BS about math or statistics or something (even if they were lying about being in school)

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TopicHow do I break up with someone I don't even want to be friends with? (blogfaqs)
VanananaHeyHey
08/25/21 9:37:52 AM
#1
tl;dr: I matched with a loser and dont want to ghost, but also do not want to stay in touch or be friends.

"Break up" is too strong a word because we've never even been out together, but "break it off" wouldn't fit in the topic line.

I accidentally swiped on a gal on Tinder and she immediately messaged me. Im still sort of new to dating sites, so I figured Id talk to her and go on a couple of no-stress dates.

We started texting and I arranged for us to go bowling at a city rec center. I made the reservation (at her request), gave her all the info on when/where to meet and I paid. On the night we were supposed to meet up, I get a message ten minutes after our meeting time saying that her parents (!) wouldnt drop her off (!) because they thought this municipal facility was in a bad area (!).

Then she said she wanted to do a voice/video date first before we met. She suggested playing video games online together. I told her I wasnt into war or cards and that, while I have Steam, Im on a Mac, so I can only download certain games. She has no job, so I figured shed take it on herself to do the research about what games might be good for us. And, I didnt mention it, but she did sort of owe me $30 for the date she let her parents let her flake on (plot twist: Im the only person on Tinder with a legitimate claim to ask for Steam codes :P). She did not do any searching or research; she suggested two or three games that werent compatible and asked me about how much some others cost. So we just played Hearthstone, since she likes it, its got free to play versions and has a low barrier to entry.

Every time I ask her what shes doing or what she has planned, she says I dont know, probably video games, which is just a really, really pathetic existence when youre grown. Even if youre big into games, you need to have another job or hobby or goal of some kind.

She said she was 27 on her profile, but she isnt a student where she said she was (and is only a BA student from what shes said, not a grad student which her age would indicate) and wasnt able to convincingly describe any classes shes ever taken. She has a messy room in her pictures and dresses very plainly in her pictures (still never saw her in real life). Im wondering if shes a minor. I dont want anything at all to do with any sort of anything with that. Even if shes an adult, Im not interested in a racist, dependent, unambitious loser.

Shes still texting me sometimes and Im responding less and less. But ghosting is BS, so I want to give her an actual breaking-it-off message. But, jeez, Im not looking to stay in touch.

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TopicThis second Covid shot is killing me.
VanananaHeyHey
08/16/21 7:57:47 AM
#9
I had a really rough time with the second dose, too. I felt fine the day after, but got walloped on days 3 and 4. I still did my work shift, though, standing up at my desk the whole time. Chills, muscle aches, brain fog, fatigue, but I've worked through worse in the past. It was tolerable. My spouse had no side effects at all.

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TopicAn elderly friend of mine died in a freak accident. :(
VanananaHeyHey
08/16/21 7:18:55 AM
#1
Several years ago, I ghostwrote a book for a local eccentric. We were still friends and had gave me other projects sometimes. He was really cool, like Forrest Gump with a foul mouth. Younger Silent Generation guy. He was a collector, businessman, family man, vintner, a pilot, a hunter, a car enthusiast, traveller, comedian, Army man, antiquarian, water skiier, gold panner, demolition man, landscaper, gardener, gravel pit runner, sanitation engineer, landlord, wedding venue operator, cook, straight up bro and dirt farmer.

His wife was a state senator, now a city council member. They have six kids and I never got a straight answer on how many grandchildren.

We had just finished writing his last testament to his kids on July 29th. He always talked about "when I die," but he didn't have any acute or chronic illness, so there was no real urgency. On August 10th, there was an accident on his property and the fire department needed heavy machinery to retrieve his body.

I don't know how he died, but I know that he had old cars, heavy models, an actual single-seater plane from the 1960s, a windmill, lots of outbuildings, a historical home he renovated several times and all kinds of collections, so I've been having horrible visions of him getting flattened by all kinds of things. It was a quick, definitive and unique end, but he deserved to die quietly.

https://www.kiro7.com/news/north-sound-news/bothell-businessman-husband-council-member-dies-accident-home/EZWCTDK6L5ALFCGLVELKBLSVLE/

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TopicDid your high school have a shitty student news segment?
VanananaHeyHey
08/13/21 11:47:02 AM
#8
We had a "radio crew" in fifth grade who did little interest segments over the intercom with Friday morning announcements. I was the anchor and then we also had someone who did sports, global trivia, school events and maybe something else. I know that my high school used to have radio broadcasting capabilities, but they were never used while I was there; it seemed like a defunct thing from the 90s. There was a rotation of kids who would do part of the announcements in high school, but not always and not the full thing.

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Vanai CE's official linguist, War-tor-le and Charizard
TopicI think of myself as conservative but I don't like cops
VanananaHeyHey
08/13/21 11:33:36 AM
#27
Term limits is a feel-good lightning rod that wouldn't solve anything. You'd have the same players stepping up to the next rung on the ladder, when the "boring," "smaller" races would just have people handpicked by the only forces who remain the same across terms, i.e. businesses and moneyed interests who have groomed their replacements. We would already have "term limits" if people paid attention to politics more often than every fourth year and actually engaged with their representatives.

There is actually value in creating professional connection and having experience. Otherwise, you have an endless parade of freshmen who will listen to the only forces of institutional stability who remain.

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Vanai CE's official linguist, War-tor-le and Charizard
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