Current Events > Are you still on good terms with any of your ex-partners?

(+) Yeah! (+)

I'm on good terms with most of them?

One I moved away from as like, a really young student so we never kept up.

Next one we're friends and she's still friends with my mom. She's in Hawaii and married as a military higher up.

Next one we're still good friends, she moved away and is now a stripper. Her mom just died.

Next one ... we never stopped being friends, but she's a literal killer now so we don't talk for obvious reasons. She owns two pet tigers.

Next one is one of the two I'm not friends at all with. Bad fall out. She just had a kid recently and is married.

Next one is the other one I'm not friends with. Bad fall out. She manages a Hot Topic somewhere near me.

Next one we're still good friends, but she is on the other side of the country living her life. I think she had a boyfriend?

And then my wife. We're not exes. We just celebrated our 7 years of marriage last night. Food was delicious.

How about you?

I've never had a partner.
Ugh.

Lol no

Plenty of time to do something about that.

I guess... I don't believe anything I do would actually matter in the situation. Also, I don't feel I have much time.

Why not?

For the first part, I've never had any success even when I was trying. So trying again would just be more of the same.

As for the time situation, I'm 40 and have never dated. My biggest in life was to be married and have kids. So let's say I do try again, and succeed. I'd only just be starting to learn how to date, and I doubt I'd find my perfect match on my first date. So I'd probably have to go through several relationships before finding someone I'd settle down with. That would likely take years. Then it's take years before I'd be comfortable proposing. Then I'd want to be certain we could manage before having kids. So add a few more years...

I'd likely be pushing 50 or more. I can't imagine being a father at that age. I'd likely be dead if old age before any of the kids grow up. Even if I rush things and marry and have kids quicker than I'd rather, it's still be a similar situation. And that's the best case scenario... I certainly wouldn't be that lucky.

I don't feel like there's any point deluding myself.

It seems like youre getting ahead of yourself. Get the relationship first, then work out if and how kids fit into it.

All I ever see of you on here is talking about how you cant have any hope of success. Thats the exact reason that it hasnt worked. Nobody is attracted to a defeatist attitude.

Would if I could. I wouldn't be this way if I could help it. I very much want to have a relationship.

I only express that on here, not irl. I actually used to be rather hopelessly optimistic. That lasted until around when I turned 31 or 32. Then I had a breakdown and never fully recovered from it. It changed my outlook. I wish I could go back, ignorance was bliss.

Also, nobody is attracted to me period. Regardless of attitude.

I doubt that very much. People can be absolutely hideous and still get a partner.

How many girls have you actually asked out?

I tend to just cut them out of my life as much as humanly possible. One of my co-workers thinks thats weird and is friends with most of her exes.

How about you?

I know, and it shows they're more desirable than I am. I've seen unattractive people be happily married, same with people with hideous attitudes.

I'll be totally honest here. I've asked out 1 person, and she said yes. It never actually happened due to unfortunate timing with Covid hitting USA at the same time.

But there are other ways to be rejected rather than me having to ask them.

This is really depressing me, and it's late. I'm going to bed. If you have any more questions I'll answer tomorrow.

I know, and it shows they're more desirable than I am. I've seen unattractive people be happily married, same with people with hideous attitudes.

I'll be totally honest here. I've asked out 1 person, and she said yes. It never actually happened due to unfortunate timing with Covid hitting USA at the same time.

But there are other ways to be rejected rather than me having to ask them.

This is really depressing me, and it's late. I'm going to bed. If you have any more questions I'll answer tomorrow.

Its pretty weird to cut someone you care about out of your life because your romantic relationship didnt work out, unless they were toxic or some other issue is at play.

I see my most recent ex once a month as we navigate moving on from a 4 year relationship. We planned to get married. Didnt work out. Losing her from my life entirely would hurt.

Nope , I find being friends with your ex to be pointless , so after we broke up we cut ties and never speak to each other again.

Whats pointless about having people you care about in your life, friends that you arent romantically involved with?

Whats pointless about having people you care about in your life, friends that you arent romantically involved with?