Current Events > Why do people say men should show interest, but then complain about horndogs?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Like if a nice guy talks about being in the friendzone, people will say he wasn't honest about his sexual intentions and should've been more forward.

But guys who are open about their sexual interests are criticized for being pervy and objectifying and stuff. Everyone rages when a guy mentions "mommy milkers" and people think vegy is creepy.

Which is it fam? What do ya'll want? smh
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we want touch screens installed into our arms

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a simple in between usually works

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I think she knows her nice guy friends like her sexually. Maybe she just doesnt want to accept it.

Not THAT much interest

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Weegee205 posted...

I think she knows her nice guy friends like her sexually. Maybe she just doesnt want to accept it.

boom
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Weegee205 posted...

I think she knows her nice guy friends like her sexually. Maybe she just doesnt want to accept it.

It's a matter of the woman not being sexually attracted to the pursuing man.

Even if the woman blatantly said she was not interested outright, that wouldn't change the man's feelings or desires.

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The difference between being 'fun and flirty' or 'creepy pervert' can be a simple matter of how attractive you are in the eyes of others. If you try suggesting one of the normal nightlife outlets in your area and get shot down immediately then you probably have your answer...

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Guys who are honest and direct about what they're looking for are not regarded as creepy or pervy, guys who are creepy or pervy about it are.

Wii_Shaker posted...

It's a matter of the woman not being sexually attracted to the pursuing man.

Even if the woman blatantly said she was not interested outright, that wouldn't change the man's feelings or desires.

What if he stopped associating with her, and moved on? Sticking around is kind of weird.

It is not hard to show interest without being creepy. If you consistently struggle to do that and multiple women are calling you creepy, that's likely on you. You're the common denominator there.

Women aren't mystical fey beings. If you truly treat them respectfully, they won't call you creepy even if they're not attracted to you.

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DuneMan posted...

The difference between being 'fun and flirty' or 'creepy pervert' can be a simple matter of how attractive you are in the eyes of others. If you try suggesting one of the normal nightlife outlets in your area and get shot down immediately then you probably have your answer...

This so much. Attractive guys are allowed a way bigger allowance for 'mistakes'

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DuneMan posted...

The difference between being 'fun and flirty' or 'creepy pervert' can be a simple matter of how attractive you are in the eyes of others. If you try suggesting one of the normal nightlife outlets in your area and get shot down immediately then you probably have your answer...

This.


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Graycap posted...

Like if a nice guy talks about being in the friendzone, people will say he wasn't honest about his sexual intentions and should've been more forward.

I don't think talking about his 'sexual intentions' are what people are referring to lol

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Should I start talking to the woman who always stops what shes doing to stare at me at the post office? Like me, she looks like an anime character that got inverse isekaid into the boring human world

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There's a 0, and 100, and you can be a 50. There are more than two speeds on the love train.

But to be honest, I think if you just don't inherently "get it", you never will. I've bent over backwards trying to explain shit, but to no avail. It seems like an innate quality.

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Guide posted...

But to be honest, I think if you just don't inherently "get it", you never will. I've bent over backwards trying to explain shit, but to no avail. It seems like an innate quality.

Based.
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So this topic is for outing incels who want confirmation that it's not their fault

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SevenTenths posted...

So this topic is for outing incels who want confirmation that it's not their fault

There's always one lol

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If it's not something you would say to your mother, it's harassment.

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People act so weird about this. People want to be hit on by people they find attractive and want people they don't find attractive to leave them alone. It's not complicated.

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legendary_zell posted...

It is not hard to show interest without being creepy. If you consistently struggle to do that and multiple women are calling you creepy, that's likely on you. You're the common denominator there.

Women aren't mystical fey beings. If you truly treat them respectfully, they won't call you creepy even if they're not attracted to you.

This. It is not rocket science.

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People in the winter when it's 0 degrees out say it's too cold, and then they say it's too hot when it's 100 degrees in the summer? What gives?

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Remember kids, it's only creepy when an ugly guy does it!
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awesome999 posted...

Remember kids, it's only creepy when an ugly guy does it!

That is not the case. I have seen ugly get into good conversations, whether it leads anywhere or not. And great looking guys get shot down for being arrogant assholes.

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CalypsoDoom posted...

It is when you hate women but want pussy

That might be true. I wouldn't know. I love women. And pussy admittedly

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Graycap posted...

Like if a nice guy talks about being in the friendzone, people will say he wasn't honest about his sexual intentions and should've been more forward.

But guys who are open about their sexual interests are criticized for being pervy and objectifying and stuff. Everyone rages when a guy mentions "mommy milkers" and people think vegy is creepy.

Which is it fam? What do ya'll want? smh

People say that "nice guys" are dishonest because they're only nice to try and get in the girls pants. That's what people complain about. You can be genuinely nice and show your interest without being creepy.

But "nice guys" (those are guys that are only pretending to be nice, hence the quotes) are the same guys that will get mad when women turn them down. "Why isn't she madly in love with me!? I was nice to her!"

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NoxObscuras posted...

People say that "nice guys" are dishonest because they're only nice to try and get in the girls pants.

But I've never seen a guy say he is being nice to a girl but just wants to fuck her. It sounds like a strawman. Generally if you're nice to someone it's to build an emotional rapport.
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Graycap posted...

But I've never seen a guy say he is being nice to a girl but just wants to fuck her. It sounds like a strawman. Generally if you're nice to someone it's to build an emotional rapport.

This is an incredibly naive thing to say.

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I just assume I'm considered ugly/creepy by default and never bothered to try.
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Inferno Dive Dragoon posted...

I just assume I'm considered ugly/creepy by default and never bothered to try.

Same.
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That's why I'm fine with women comedians talking 15 minutes on stage about their vaginas and periods.

If you can't leave your fucking penis out of everything, why the hell should they have to do the same with their genitals?

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Inferno Dive Dragoon posted...

I just assume I'm considered ugly/creepy by default and never bothered to try.

It's probably not your looks. You're probably not as ugly as you think you are. You should try to be more social though. This part can be changed. Better to try and fail, then not try at all.

Wii_Shaker posted...

It's a matter of the woman not being sexually attracted to the pursuing man.

This /topic.

supposedly Hasan is so hot he walks down the street and girls tap him on the shoulder to get his attention

also girls streamers literally offer themselves to him

How do you not see the glaring middle ground between those two things... This is such a stupid question it makes my head hurt

Because you can't show you're sexually interested in women without talking about "mommy milkers" or doing the Vegy approach? Lol

Also, using the word "friendzone" makes it seem like you don't respect women enough to be able to be friends with them unless you're getting sex out of it. If you're a well adjusted person, you can accept someone doesn't want to pursue a sexual relationship and not feel entitled to it just because you don't call them bitches or treat them like shit. Usually guys who use "friendzone" don't give a shit about any generiousity a women shows them unless it's about giving them sex. She could be just as nice as you are in return but you will think it's not good enough because you're entitled to sex and not just the same respectful treatment you're showing.

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I got shot down recently. It went fine: she said something that made me think she liked me, and I asked her if she wanted hang out. She demurred. A week later, I brought up again, framing by asking her how she felt about it, and she looked me dead in the eye and said she didnt want to, she didnt know what we would do, and that she was seeing some one(I had, in a few occasions, made it known I thought she was attractive). I indicated my interest was not purely sexual true and she offered a willingness to do a group thing.
I shot that down, both because I have no intentions of trying such an undertaking and because I wanted her to know that I knew precisely what she meant. She responded by admitting she wasnt much of a planner.
Ill still say hi and bye and make the occasional polite conversation, but Im not going to let her confide in me, since were not friends.
Given that Im transitioning soon and theres little reason to believe shes into women, probably wouldnt have worked in n the long run. Not romantically, anyway.

Like literally asking someone out on a date is a prime example of showing interest/making intentions known without being a "horndog" or saying cringe shit like "mommy milkers". You really needed that to be explained to you?

Lost_All_Senses posted...

Also, using the word "friendzone" makes it seem like you don't respect women enough to be able to be friends with them unless you're getting sex out of it.

In some cases the guy is not getting intimacy from anywhere so it gets tiresome to always be locked out of it no matter who he associates with.
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NoxObscuras posted...

But "nice guys" (those are guys that are only pretending to be nice, hence the quotes) are the same guys that will get mad when women turn them down. "Why isn't she madly in love with me!? I was nice to her!"

99.9999% of the time they're just the absolute bare minimum of nice too.

Because they're usually some combination of completely devoid of personality and not actually nice people, they think being polite is enough.

They also treat it as transactional. They think if they put X amount of nice in, they deserve Y amount of reciprocation (which is determined by them).

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Why do people like playful assertiveness but hate creepy aggressiveness? the topic.

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Graycap posted...

In some cases the guy is not getting intimacy from anywhere so it gets tiresome to always be locked out of it no matter who he associates with.

That's not a response to what was said and you are veering real hard into incel shit.

If you want to bone a broad you take your shot and if you fail you move on, not difficult.

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Tenlaar posted...

That's not a response to what was said and you are veering real hard into incel shit.

Maybe read better. It's a response to the bizarre notion that talking about a friendzone somehow means you don't respect women. I don't think not wanting to die without ever having a romantic relationship means not respecting women. If you put a lot of tine into courtship and nothing ever manifests it's easy to feel trapped.
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