Current Events > Anything wrong with a 33 year old dating a 19 year old?

(+) Yeah! (+)

A year ago, I decided to go back to college to get a degree. I needed to finish up a few generals before I could actually start the degree, so I attended a community college for a semester.

While waiting for a class to begin, I happen to strike up a conversation with a girl waiting for a different class. She actually seemed to enjoy talking to me and before we parted ways, we exchanged social media info. From here, I didn't really talk to her much.

Fast forward a year later. My church is doing a "Friend Day." For some reason, I strike up a conversation with this girl on Facebook and I invite her. She visits my church, we get lunch, exchange phone numbers, she gives me a hug and leaves. And she's been sending me text messages with :)'s. I think she actually likes me.

As the title says, I also found out she's 19. She was homeschooled so she doesn't act like a typical girl straight out of high school. She can carry a conversation about anything. Do you think I should pursue this?

There's nothing legally or really morally wrong with it.

I just personally find it gross.

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If you are both over 18 and are fine with it that's all that matters.

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You two are both consenting adults, so I see no issue with it.

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Alucard188 posted...

You two are both consenting adults, so I see no issue with it.

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Heartomaton posted...

I just personally find it gross.

I don't find it gross, but the age gap might make it hard to relate to each other. It's almost an entire generational gap there.

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What would be wrong with dating a legal age adult, no nothing is wrong with it, have fun

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Alucard188 posted...

You two are both consenting adults, so I see no issue with it.

...

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Heartomaton posted...

There's nothing legally or really morally wrong with it.

I just personally find it gross.

Why though?

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Nah who the fuck cares? This is one of those weird topics like circumcision that CE goes nuts over.

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I feel that 19 might be a little too young for a relationship if you're 33. A lot of personality, life experiences and knowledge is learned between 18-25. Personally, I'd feel more comfortable at at least 23. At the minimum probably 21.

But I don't necessarily think it's *wrong*

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I met a 42 year old guy married to a 19 yo they had zero problems except she said she felt like the mature one in the marriage

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Does she know you're 33?

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33 / 2 = 16.5

16.5 + 7 = 23.5

not gonna work bruh

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Sheiky-Baby posted...

Does she know you're 33?

This is a good question. I never actually told her my age. But I did mention to her that I hadn't been to college in over 10 years. So doing the math, the youngest I could be is 28.

Isaac1987 posted...

While waiting for a class to begin, I happen to strike up a conversation with a girl waiting for a different class.

Isaac1987 posted...

She was homeschooled

Which one is it?

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I'm 33 and it wouldn't feel right to me. Also everyone would definitely talk about you as you walk 15ft away.

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You having to ask is a tell...

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samurai bandit posted...

Which one is it?

You don't get homeschooled for college do you? Use your brain.

littlebro07 posted...

33 / 2 = 16.5

16.5 + 7 = 23.5

not gonna work bruh

dont be a negative nancy

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Alucard188 posted...

I don't find it gross, but the age gap might make it hard to relate to each other. It's almost an entire generational gap there.

This, essentially. Once both people are consenting adults, its nobodys business but their own.

I couldnt relate to an 18 year old, though. Theyd have been born after I graduated school and wed in all likelihood have very little in common, in terms of interests or personal goals related to life stages.

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modena posted...

I'm 33 and it wouldn't feel right to me. Also everyone would definitely talk about you as you walk 15ft away.

let haters talk, it wouldnt bother me

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Im 28 and I personally wouldnt date someone under 21.

But honestly its not that big of a deal, Id probably let her know how old you are though.

Isaac1987 posted...

You don't get homeschooled for college do you? Use your brain.

I actually dont know because homeschooling is not a thing where Im from

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Does she know how old you are?

Nice

I feel like a girl under 21 would be the only kind of girl dumb enough to date me at this point but I graduated college so I'm unlikely to meet any

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Conflict posted...

Uh, no they wouldn't.

Hate to break it to you but people don't generally gossip like teenagers about other people's social lives as they enter adulthood

Hate to break it to you, but they do.

Alucard188 posted...

You two are both consenting adults, so I see no issue with it.

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Isaac1987 posted...

Hate to break it to you, but they do.

Nobody who matters do.

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If your intentions are noble and you're chemically compatible with her (hair smells nice) please pursue her. To hell with the age gap, I often see 10-20 year gaps in 50+ year marriages. Girls love an older companion to guide her. And for us, it feels so good to have our protective/teaching instincts kick in with a younger girl. All while teasing the shit out of them and having a good time. ;)

If you're just trying to hook up and drop her, don't. While it's legal and no one can stop you, it's petty. Like I said a young girl needs to be loved and guided, not have her feelings and emotions played with through a pumpdump hookup. This will cause her to be less trusting of guys in the future. Which means for your short-term thrill, you could possibly ruin lifelong happiness of two people down the road. Just don't.

Houston posted...

I feel that 19 might be a little too young for a relationship if you're 33. A lot of personality, life experiences and knowledge is learned between 18-25. Personally, I'd feel more comfortable at at least 23. At the minimum probably 21.

But I don't necessarily think it's *wrong*

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Johnny_Nutcase posted...

Why though?

Because? You're asking why someone feels the way they do, man. Most of the time feelings have no explanation.

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eh. do you actually like her? could ask her out on a date and see how things go. and let her know your age. i've hungout with younger girls before but never dated any that were 10+ years younger.

i'm 33 as well and went back to college but covid happened a couple months after. i can't see me pursuing a 19 year old. i feel like more around 25.

she's a different generation and doesn't know anything you grew up on. like she was born after the ps2 game out. so ps3/360 was probably her first system and that's so weird to think about since a lot of use grew up on snes/64.

creativeme posted...

eh. do you actually like her? could ask her out on a date and see how things go. and let her know your age. i've hungout with younger girls before but never dated any that were 10+ years younger.

i'm 33 as well and went back to college but covid happened a couple months after. i can't see me pursuing a 19 year old. i feel like more around 25.

she's a different generation and doesn't know anything you grew up on. like she was born after the ps2 game out. so ps3/360 was probably her first system and that's so weird to think about since a lot of use grew up on snes/64.

i dont see any of that as a problem, at least not for me

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Youre both legal. Go for it.

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Heartomaton posted...

Because? You're asking why someone feels the way they do, man. Most of the time feelings have no explanation.

That is not remotely true. All feelings have an explanation. It just so happens that a lot of people lack self-awareness and so they don't understand the reasons for their own feelings.

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Isaac1987 posted...

This is a good question. I never actually told her my age. But I did mention to her that I hadn't been to college in over 10 years. So doing the math, the youngest I could be is 28.

Oh boy.

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Go for it. You two are both legal and you like her. Could stuff hit the fan later on yeah. But you only get one life and if you are not hurting anyone else you live it to the fullest .

Edit just saw you didn't tell her your age. Tell her that and if she is still in do the above. Remember don't hurt people that means being mean and hiding stuff too.

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Isaac1987 posted...

This is a good question. I never actually told her my age. But I did mention to her that I hadn't been to college in over 10 years. So doing the math, the youngest I could be is 28.

Sheiky-Baby posted...

Oh boy.

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Familiar username.

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Sheiky-Baby posted...

Oh boy.

https://youtu.be/DjK9GJMBpt0?t=48

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Society might think so, but society is jealous.

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I went back to college, and in my third year I was 31 and I started dating a 20 year old. My advice is not to care about the gap, it literally doesn't matter.

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Johnny_Nutcase posted...

Why though?

same reason i don't think it's reasonable to expect teenagers to be responsible for 100k+ loans to go to college. The odds of the relationship not being exploitive is small, but of course not a guarantee.

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No real issue honestly. Hell what do most guys her age even have to offer her that most 30yos dont have and then some?

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Depending on the people involved, no there's nothing wrong with it
Personally I would say it's kinda sketch. I think there's a whole host of life experience that you've experienced that she hasn't, and her being home schooled raises even more red flags for me (because they weren't exposed to their peers as much as typical students)

Also the fact that you're hiding your age is literally why I think it's usually gross. Typically the older person is more likely to manipulate and control the younger and it's just weird as fuck

DarthAragorn posted...

I feel like a girl under 21 would be the only kind of girl dumb enough to date me at this point but I graduated college so I'm unlikely to meet any

This is also why it's urgh. It raises an eyebrow when women your own age won't date you so going for a younger and more naiive person says it all

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Prismsblade posted...

No real issue honestly. Hell what do most guys her age even have to offer her that most 30yos dont have and then some?

Things like growing up on tiktoc, the commonality of not knowing what a landline is, etc.

That said, not an issue.

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I dated a 19 when i was 29. Wont do it again. Maturity level just isnt there.

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