Poll of the Day > I am really struggling tonight

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Jen0125
10/14/20 10:42:22 PM
#1:


Emotional Rollercoaster

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ChronxDaHemphog
10/14/20 10:45:14 PM
#2:



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Jen0125
10/14/20 10:45:43 PM
#3:


ChronxDaHemphog posted...

Ty for the cute meme

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wolfy42
10/14/20 10:52:08 PM
#4:


I few jokes to cheer you up.

What's the best way to hear what dolphins have to say? Listen to their podcast!

What do you call a wolf that has things figured out? Aware wolf.

Taco Bell forced to shut down temporarily...
Due to the Corona virus the shortage of toilet paper has made this step a necessity.

The stork is the bird that helps deliver babies. What bird helps prevent pregnancy? The swallow.


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YoukaiSlayer
10/14/20 10:53:46 PM
#5:


Same. Been a really hard month or so honestly.

Wanna talk about it?

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YoukaiSlayer
10/14/20 10:54:32 PM
#6:


wolfy42 posted...
Taco Bell forced to shut down temporarily...
Due to the Corona virus the shortage of toilet paper has made this step a necessity.

The stork is the bird that helps deliver babies. What bird helps prevent pregnancy? The swallow.
I like these two.

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Jen0125
10/14/20 10:54:49 PM
#7:


YoukaiSlayer posted...
Same. Been a really hard month or so honestly.

Wanna talk about it?

Just stuff with my ex so if I talk about it people will give me shit

You okay?

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party_animal07
10/14/20 10:55:27 PM
#8:


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Entity13
10/14/20 11:00:45 PM
#9:


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Metalsonic66
10/14/20 11:07:45 PM
#10:


She told me I was too immature.

So I told her she was no longer allowed in my pillow-fort.

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Jen0125
10/14/20 11:09:42 PM
#11:


party_animal07 posted...
https://youtu.be/4ize1m0B4Ew

Ooh it's a real song

Entity13 posted...
Anything you want to talk about?

Idk just got in a huge fight with my ex today. He already slept with another person and thought I wouldn't know about it. Like I'm not stupid. I get he can do it but it's only been two months since we broke up and it guts me. I told him he should move out. I asked him if it made him feel better to do it and he said no it didn't. Then he tried to gaslight me saying I play a victim and even my best friend said so. So I called her to ask and she was pissed because she never said that. He even texted her last night after he slept with the other woman saying he loved me and wanted to be with me and if there was anything we could do to fix what is going on. But there isn't. And it just really fucking sucks. And now I have to have the image of him fucking some woman who is probably hotter than me in my head.

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YoukaiSlayer
10/14/20 11:16:25 PM
#12:


Jen0125 posted...
Just stuff with my ex so if I talk about it people will give me shit
Fair enough. I think I gave you minor shit for it. I'm even worse at break ups though. I remember when I was 15 my girlfriend broke up with me and I legit tried to learn guitar and write a song to win her back, in the course of like 2 days. God that was so embarrassing (it obviously didn't work). It's like "hm, this relationship is kinda meh but it's nice to be in one I guess". Gets dumped "MY LIFE IS OVER I NEED HER BACK". I like to think I'm not an idiot, but I've gone through that same thing every time I've been dumped even though I should I know better.

Jen0125 posted...
You okay?
Honestly no. Feel free to just not read the rest if you don't want to listen to a whiny depressing rant.

My health is really bad and I'm just beyond frustrated with the medical system and life in general. I somehow got salmonella so I'm trying not to die from that. I've had chronic issues for 17 months and I was finally getting better about a month ago. i got a diagnosis and had meds to try and was just feeling a bit better in general. Then I got a mouth infection and holy fuck my life has just spiraled downward so hard since then. The meds I was taking for my pancreas now make me vomit which combined with post antibiotic diarrhea and apparently fucking salmonella even though I only can eat brown rice has my whole Gi tract extra fucked up. My liver enzymes spiked and my liver hurts (mildly for now). I'm critically malnourished and was down to 118 lbs as a 6 ft tall guy. None of the doctors know how to treat me cause I have no one but 3 ultra rare conditions that affect different symptoms so I just get called a zebra and bounced around.

I stopped taking my multivitamin somedays because I was so naeseous but that led to even more extreme vitamin A deficiency which turned my vision green and dim (which is extremely depressing) I'm too sick to handle of the appointment making and stuff so my mom does that but she is also chronically ill and this is all really too much for her to handle but theres just no one else so she's always feeling like she's letting me down as well being in a lot of pain and I just wish so much that I could do this myself and not have to see her suffer so much every day for me but I just can't and no one cares and the world is fucked.

It's also quite expensive. Me and mom can't work from illness so we are living with my grandma but we've nearly burned through all her money trying to keep me alive so she's going to have to sell the house in a few months and I don't know what the fuck I'll do after that if I'm even still alive and I feel guilty that it's basically ruining her retirment and that my grandpa went back to work like 8 years ago the first time I was super ill and basically worked despite being ill himself which I feel like led him to an early and extremely miserable death. Just being alive tortures and kills everyone that bothers to care about me and what have I done to deserve any of it? I feel obligated to try my best to live and have a good life so it wasn't all for nothing but the shit medical industry seems hellbent on making sure I can't do that and I've had nothing but brown rice and water for my last 3000 meals, I can't even handle listening to music, exercising, or sexual activity, or video games, or reading, or anime. All I do all day is eat brown rice and watch youtube videos and suffer and every attempt to make things better has just made them worse.

My one friend that I've managed to keep over the years has moved away and is often too busy for me and I feel like when I do hang out online all I do is bring him down because everything I have to talk about is just misery. I'm frankly super jealous of him. We used to spend tons of time together and liked all the same stuff but he went to college, got a girlfriend he is bound to marry, has a job he enjoys, has a ton of hobbies and makes plenty of money and on the other end I feel like I got on the wrong bus and ended up in some nightmare.

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Jen0125
10/14/20 11:19:32 PM
#13:


Damn, that sounds really rough. Medical issues are the worst. I'm sorry you're dealing with all of that. And losing a friend is never easy.

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YoukaiSlayer
10/14/20 11:23:01 PM
#14:


I mean, he is still my best friend, I've known him since I was 1 and he was 0 so he's basically family, it just sucks that we've drifted as far apart as we have. I still manage to talk to him on skype (he refuses to use discord for no reason) every few weeks.

I do feel a bit better after saying all that though. I'm in it until the end either way so I might as well make the best of it.

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Jen0125
10/14/20 11:24:06 PM
#15:


Sometimes you just gotta get it out.

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Smarkil
10/15/20 1:14:08 AM
#16:


Jen0125 posted...
And now I have to have the image of him fucking some woman who is probably hotter than me in my head.

shes probably uglier tbh cause of statistics or w.e

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Jen0125
10/15/20 1:14:50 AM
#17:


Smarkil posted...
shes probably uglier tbh cause of statistics or w.e

What statistics

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Wanded
10/15/20 1:31:56 AM
#18:


YoukaiSlayer posted...
I somehow got salmonella so I'm trying not to die from that. I've had chronic issues for 17 months and I was finally getting better about a month ago. i got a diagnosis and had meds to try and was just feeling a bit better in general. Then I got a mouth infection and holy f*** my life has just spiraled downward so hard since then
brah just do a juice based candida diet, pm me i'll tell you how

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Entity13
10/15/20 1:43:29 AM
#19:


Jen0125 posted...
Idk just got in a huge fight with my ex today. He already slept with another person and thought I wouldn't know about it. Like I'm not stupid. I get he can do it but it's only been two months since we broke up and it guts me. I told him he should move out. I asked him if it made him feel better to do it and he said no it didn't. Then he tried to gaslight me saying I play a victim and even my best friend said so. So I called her to ask and she was pissed because she never said that. He even texted her last night after he slept with the other woman saying he loved me and wanted to be with me and if there was anything we could do to fix what is going on. But there isn't. And it just really f***ing sucks. And now I have to have the image of him f***ing some woman who is probably hotter than me in my head.

Damn, that is messed up, but I'm glad you were able to share.

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Smarkil
10/15/20 1:46:17 AM
#20:


Jen0125 posted...
What statistics

i dont know i just made it up

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joemodda
10/15/20 1:50:39 AM
#21:


Smarkil posted...
Jen0125 posted...

What statistics

i dont know i just made it up

Odds are there are women out there younger than you, and age is quite a large factor in general attractiveness of women. The game only gets harder for women as they age.

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PK_Spam
10/15/20 1:58:06 AM
#22:




its supposed to sparkle

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shadowsword87
10/15/20 2:00:02 AM
#23:


I've been working on a takehome exam, on and off, for 6 hours so far, and I just finished about half of it. I've got all day tomorrow, but uuuuuugh.
I feel you.

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YoukaiSlayer
10/15/20 2:00:57 AM
#24:


Wanded posted...
brah just do a juice based candida diet, pm me i'll tell you how
I have MCAS, I react to everything ever. I react to water with a small amount of potassium sprinkled in, I react to my own adrenaline, I react to saline IV. A single drop of juice and I'll be convulsing and unresponsive within 20 minutes.

Jen0125 posted...
Idk just got in a huge fight with my ex today. He already slept with another person and thought I wouldn't know about it. Like I'm not stupid. I get he can do it but it's only been two months since we broke up and it guts me. I told him he should move out. I asked him if it made him feel better to do it and he said no it didn't. Then he tried to gaslight me saying I play a victim and even my best friend said so. So I called her to ask and she was pissed because she never said that. He even texted her last night after he slept with the other woman saying he loved me and wanted to be with me and if there was anything we could do to fix what is going on. But there isn't. And it just really fucking sucks. And now I have to have the image of him fucking some woman who is probably hotter than me in my head.
I somehow missed this. That definitely sucks. I do think him moving out should make it a lot easier to heal. It's gotta be rough trying to move on when you still care about each other and have to see each other so often. Hang in there.

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Jen0125
10/15/20 2:14:35 AM
#25:


joemodda posted...
Odds are there are women out there younger than you, and age is quite a large factor in general attractiveness of women. The game only gets harder for women as they age.

I'm only 31.

PK_Spam posted...


its supposed to sparkle

Lol thanks.

YoukaiSlayer posted...
I do think him moving out should make it a lot easier to heal.

It doesn't feel that way right now

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SunWuKung420
10/15/20 2:24:41 AM
#26:


Jen, be strong, be you.

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YoukaiSlayer
10/15/20 2:40:45 AM
#27:


Jen0125 posted...
It doesn't feel that way right now
I'm sure it doesn't but out of sight out of mind works eventually.

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Jen0125
10/15/20 2:53:13 AM
#28:


Can't sleep ugh

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shadowsword87
10/15/20 2:54:03 AM
#29:


I'm making a garbo frozen pizza, because I don't have the mental energy to make anything, such is life.

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DeltaBladeX
10/15/20 3:02:37 AM
#30:


Sorry to hear how things are going for you right now. Unfortunately not good at cheering people up. Having trouble keeping my youngest brother happy right now.
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Kimbos_Egg
10/15/20 3:14:08 AM
#31:


Jen0125 posted...
Just stuff with my ex so if I talk about it people will give me shit

You okay?

https://i.imgur.com/pTjYwOb.jpg

Edit it to fit around whatever you're whining about.

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Metalsonic66
10/15/20 3:52:43 AM
#32:


THEIR just jealous lol

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ClarkDuke
10/15/20 4:04:48 AM
#33:


it'll be easier once he's gone, he's clearly trying to mess with your head, ok?

and keep your head up, i'm sure whomever he slept with, likely had meat curtains, ok?

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Wanded
10/15/20 7:51:12 AM
#34:


YoukaiSlayer posted...
I have MCAS, I react to everything ever. I react to water with a small amount of potassium sprinkled in, I react to my own adrenaline, I react to saline IV. A single drop of juice and I'll be convulsing and unresponsive within 20 minutes.
you react to spinach, cucumber, avocado, lemon and such?

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Jen0125
10/15/20 9:18:27 AM
#35:


ClarkDuke posted...
and keep your head up, i'm sure whomever he slept with, likely had meat curtains, ok?

Lmao

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adjl
10/15/20 9:34:50 AM
#36:


Honestly, if you can swing it, it'd probably be best for you to move out. You're not wrong that this whole mess is his fault for buying the house under false pretenses, and that the fairest option would be for him to take responsibility for that and move out, but if he's not willing to do that (which is not actually an unreasonable position, where you'll be leaving the country in a year or two and he'll presumably stay in the house), staying put is only going to make you miserable. This sounds like you really need to consider whether being right is more important than being happy.

Wanded posted...
brah just do a juice based candida diet, pm me i'll tell you how

Not gonna lie, my first thought was that this was a euphemism for eating out a woman with a yeast infection.

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Jen0125
10/15/20 9:36:35 AM
#37:


He said he'd move out and keep paying his half of the mortgage yesterday while we were fighting. It just sucks because I don't want him to leave but I can't be around him doing these things.

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JixHedgehog
10/15/20 9:37:29 AM
#38:


Get a revenge lay

If he overreacts, you know he still cares

Yep, that was my mistake when my ex hopped into the sack with some stranger at a hotel.. well, that and not moving out

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Jen0125
10/15/20 9:42:07 AM
#39:


I don't want to have sex with anyone.

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Entity13
10/15/20 10:33:46 AM
#40:


Yeah, even the petty side of me wouldn't revenge-lay over this. What I might do is find a random couple the ex doesn't know, and hire them to do it either one or in the ex's car while somewhere in public. Make sure it doesn't trace back to me.

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Jen0125
10/15/20 10:38:19 AM
#41:


He just left this morning while crying. I wanted him to say just so we could smooth over the fight and he could leave when we are at a good place but he said he didn't want to talk to me.

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