Current Events > do you belive in beating your kids?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Trickfinger posted...

isnt it funny how parents only beat their kids when theyre small? wonder why they never try it once the kid hits post puberty.

That is another cultural difference, I see.

La chancleta knows no age.

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physical discipline =//= beating your kid

Kaiganeer posted...

physical discipline =//= beating your kid

explain

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Evening_Dragon posted...

Yup. And this isn't to say that it's right, but at this point I'm just frustrated with how barren the attempts at making sense have been.

Just because you're for a good cause doesn't mean you can shout stupid shit, @averagejoel

where did I shout stupid shit?

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Kaiganeer posted...

physical discipline =//= beating your kid

https://giphy.com/gifs/gip9I9OAAmN40Tord1/html5
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It depends, most kids don't need to be spanked but some little shits do

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I didnt before this smash annoncement...

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spanking is physical abuse.

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not today internet!!

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I mean, morally I don't have a side, but as someone who's on the younger side and was occasionally beat for being a little shit when I was younger, I think it's fine.

Because I know I would've kept being a little shit no matter what they did, but intimidation can get me to learn respect, I get.

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Kaiganeer posted...

physical discipline =//= beating your kid

Its the same thing. Either way makes you a terrible parent.

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Trickfinger posted...

isnt it funny how parents only beat their kids when theyre small? wonder why they never try it once the kid hits post puberty.

Lol @ you thinking this

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Can't believe someone seriously tried to claim child abuse is OK because of their culture.

HarryCaNab posted...

Can't believe someone seriously tried to claim child abuse is OK because of their culture.

No one has said that

RedJackson posted...

No one has said that

Spanking = child abuse

Trickfinger posted...

isnt it funny how parents only beat their kids when theyre small? wonder why they never try it once the kid hits post puberty.

I can think of at least 3 different times when my dad punched me in the face from the age 14 onward. I don't think it was warranted any of those times and it made me lose all respect for him
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HarryCaNab posted...

Spanking = child abuse

HarryCaNab posted...

Can't believe someone seriously tried to claim child abuse is OK because of their culture.

Let me clarify; if I walked into a therapist to get help for issues it wont work for me. I will use every excuse in the book to say you dont know Jack and I would be both right and wrong

HarryCaNab posted...

Can't believe someone seriously tried to claim child abuse is OK because of their culture.

RedJackson posted...

No one has said that

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cuttin_in_farm posted...

Im getting sick of white people deciding what is and isnt right for every culture but theirs. Spanking is a common disciplinary measure in the Asian culture, black culture, and Latino. But somehow, white people think their way is the only correct one. It truly pisses me off.

Obviously some white people are okay with spanking, and some minorities are not. Im speaking generally.

But this topic comes up every month, and at this point, yall must be trolling.

Did you guys miss this post?

HarryCaNab posted...

Did you guys miss this post?

no alt account, we just ignred it cause its nonsense lol//

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Did that guy really play the race card during a discussion about spanking?

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VonOrdelia posted...

Did that guy really play the race card during a discussion about spanking?

This is such a white guy comment I don't even know what to say

Hit an Adult? Fine and possible jail time.
Hit a child who doesn't know any better, looks up to you and relies on you to teach how to behave? A-ok

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Funkydog posted...

Hit an Adult? Fine and possible jail time.
Hit a child who doesn't know any better, looks up to you and relies on you to teach how to behave? A-ok

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cuttin_in_farm posted...

I believe in spanking.

I dont believe in beating.

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the difference being?

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Nah, you got it man. There's no difference.

You can go ahead and close this one out.

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Trickfinger posted...

the difference being?

You're more likely to kill a child if you beat them.

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ChrisTaka posted...

You're more likely to kill a child if you beat them.

that doesn't mean that spanking isn't physical abuse

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Trickfinger posted...

the difference being?

Beating sounds like you're taking out your failures on your kids.

Spanking is when you realize that the reprecussions from them not getting a lesson through their head, like don't run in the street or don't touch something hot is far worse than a swat to the hand or bottom. And it's easiest to associate what not to do with minor pain. It's the easiest thing to comprehend. So my kid gets a slap to the back of the hand and doesn't get hit by a car. Fair trade off.

People who say "beating your kids or not" are obviously hesitant that they don't have a case by not making it an extreme Because to actually call it what it is would seem far more reasonable. You guys know what you're doing by categorizing it all as "beating". You're being melodramatic to make the other side seem more extreme. Nobody supports beating kids.

Just like nobody sees a swat on the butt and thinks "omg, this person just BEAT their kid. Call 911!"

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Lost_All_Senses posted...

Beating sounds like you're taking out your failures on your kids.

Spanking is when you realize that the reprecussions from them not getting a lesson through their head, like don't run in the street or don't touch something hot is far worse than a swat to the hand or bottom. And it's easiest to associate what not to do with minor pain. It's the easiest thing to comprehend. So my kid gets a slap to the back of the hand and doesn't get hit by a car. Fair trade off.

so you just made this up?

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Lost_All_Senses posted...

Beating sounds like you're taking out your failures on your kids.

Spanking is when you realize that the reprecussions from them not getting a lesson through their head, like don't run in the street or don't touch something hot is far worse than a swat to the hand or bottom. And it's easiest to associate what not to do with minor pain. It's the easiest thing to comprehend. So my kid gets a slap to the back of the hand and doesn't get hit by a car. Fair trade off.

People who say "beating your kids or not" are obviously hesitant that they don't have a case by not making it an extreme Because to actually call it what it is would seem far more reasonable. You guys know what you're doing by categorizing it all as "beating". You're being melodramatic to make the other side seem more extreme. Nobody supports beating kids.

Just like nobody sees a swat on the butt and thinks "omg, this person just BEAT their kid. Call 911!"

Numerous studies have been done to show that even this "spanking" ultimately has a bigger negative impact than any positive. You can teach children these important things without hitting as well, it's not like all the countries where it's banned have children not knowing basic life lessons.

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Trickfinger posted...

so you just made this up?

Dumb nothing of a response

Funkydog posted...

Numerous studies have been done to show that even this "spanking" ultimately has a bigger negative impact than any positive. You can teach children these important things without hitting as well, it's not like all the countries where it's banned have children not knowing basic life lessons.

A little better response. Yeah yeah yeah, study says this, study says that. Experts say "Pump your kids with medication and fill our pockets instead". Studies say "This specific group we use to support our preconceived views gave us these results that we were looking to get"

Man, Im not living my life by manufactured statistics and experts who have their hands in pockets or their views made up and will only use the results that support those views

Regardless of if you use experts/statistics or not. Everyone is only using the ones that already support their views. They seek out the experts and statistics that support what they think.

But that's a whole different conversation. We can stay on the main one if you don't wanna go this route. Cause if you still think experts and statistics are for your best interest and no one has any personal stake in the results, that's that.

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"I'm going to refuse to change my mind because this is how I've always done it"

Tradition doesn't mean something is right. The brilliant part about being human is we can learn, adapt and grow.

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Funkydog posted...

"I'm going to refuse to change my mind because this is how I've always done it"

Tradition doesn't mean something is right. The brilliant part about being human is we can learn, adapt and grow.

I mean, like most other people here, I haven't "done" anything. None of us have kids, for the most part. Honestly, this poll would be way more interesting if it took note of who actually had kids along with their answer.

Some of ya'll literally never even interact with kids. Of course if you're never around kids you're just gonna give whatever answer makes you come off as the good guy or more compassionate.

Id obviously never spank any of my nieces or nephews cause that's not my place.

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RedJackson posted...

yup

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No but i do believe in beating your significant other.

Lost_All_Senses posted...

I mean, like most other people here, I haven't "done" anything. None of us have kids, for the most part. Honestly, this poll would be way more interesting if it took note of who actually had kids along with their answer.

Irrelevant. Being a parent doesn't bestow infinite knowledge of how to raise children and most adults are clueless and have to learn as they go.

Lost_All_Senses posted...

Some of ya'll literally never even interact with kids. Of course if you're never around kids you're just gonna give whatever answer makes you come off as the good guy or more compassionate.

Again, irrelevant. Children are stupid, frustrating and don't listen. As a parent/adult it is your duty to teach them better and help them grow, something you can do without hitting them. All it does is upset them if they are young, or teach them to lie if they are older to avoid the trouble. Very little gets learnt and it just perpetuates a cycle of showing violence is a solution to problems.

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I'm a parent of a 7 year old and stepparent to an 8 year old. Absolutely no chance I'd lay a hand on them.

Aeriis posted...

I picked an article for you that I think is easy to understand: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3447048/

if you would like anymore or need any help, lmk :3

@Aeriis

I am going to be honest. I hate reading things like this, because they never get to the point. I dislike academic reading.

But I have attempted to reread this a few times, and Im not convinced about some things.

1) This seems to combine a plethora of individual studies together to try and make a point. That means there is no singular experiment that is being conducted, and I cannot even verify my question about how theyre going about doing it.

2) A lot of the studies this link references are obvious things. Such as Child abusers are more likely to spank their children than not spank them. Or how Infants less than a years old who were spanked the month before are 2.3 times more likely to suffer an injury. Who tf is spanking newborns?

3) A few of the studies imply spanking have no correlation with negative outcomes in the toddler to young child age group. Which should be obvious. That is the age group that would most likely be spanked AFTER other forms of discipline do not work. Teenagers, however, are able to be talked to much more, so parents who are still relying on physical punishment at this stage are more likely to be causing harm due to incompetence.

4) I still dont see what defines as spanking in any of the studies. At least one study outright says spanking or slapping which is vague. A lot of them just say corporal punishment which isnt specific either.

Do you have a singular study that shows your views better? Not a study that is just a conglomeration?

Obviously, when going to the references, I only read the summarized info. These are extremely long articles and since you apparently went to school, surely you have one available so I can not read incorrectly.

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Alright. I took a shower and didn't expect to have to answer to 2 different people when I got out lol. So Im just gonna go with the one talking about having more experience, rather than the one dismissing all experience as meaningless. Im not the low hanging fruit type, I want someone to change my mind.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


Those are good points on the Big Pharma end. But I also added it was to push their already solidified views. You gotta be naive to think people are above retesting until they get the results that fit what they want to believe. All you gotta do is observe human behavior and everything always being disproven years after an "expert" claimed it to be. All this "well, the internet says" shit has fallen apart long ago.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


That must he very taxing, and you're a honorable person for taking that role. So much so, this puts me in the position to look even more like an asshole for even continuing to dispute my side lol. But it is what it is.

Id argue, that being in the position you are in actually skews your perception. Not in a way it wouldn't make you efficient at your job. But in a way that you see the worst end of it regularly, so your own personal experience is dramatically tweaked.

It's like saying pretty much all gunshot wounds are fatal because you specifically operate on the people who were shot in the head. They not, it's just you're only seeing the results from the ones that are fatal.

God damn, that analogy was probably not the best one to use. But it works.

Also, I feel like you pulled us back into "abuse" and away from "spankings". Which always seems to be the case in these arguments. I'm talking like a swat to the butt ir hand like once or twice wlw month. How many kids do you get that come in with that story? The story of "My parents swatted by butt when I went to touch the stove, now I terrorize kids at school"

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Lost_All_Senses posted...

Alright. I took a shower and didn't expect to have to answer to 2 different people when I got out lol. So Im just gonna go with the one talking about having more experience, rather than the one dismissing all experience as meaningless.

It's not "dismissing" it, but far too often parents will go "well I've RAISED children" in response to any criticism, like it has any actual meaning. Yes, raising children isn't easy, but doesn't mean just because you've done it you've done it well. Are we going to take the advice of all the shitty parents, just because they've raised a child? I think we'd all agree it'd be absurd to take the advice of a negligent parent, for example.

Can you raise a children with the occasional smack? Obviously, given 99% of the current population has been raised that way. But it doesn't mean we need to keep doing it, when studies show it has very little positive outcome. When it doesn't actually have a beneficial effect, and does worse at teaching children over other methods, why carry on with it? Sure, it works, but not well.

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Funkydog posted...

It's not "dismissing" it, but far too often parents will go "well I've RAISED children" in response to any criticism, like it has any actual meaning. Yes, raising children isn't easy, but doesn't mean just because you've done it you've done it well. Are we going to take the advice of all the shitty parents, just because they've raised a child? I think we'd all agree it'd be absurd to take the advice of a negligent parent, for example.

Can you raise a children with the occasional smack? Obviously, given 99% of the current population has been raised that way. But it doesn't mean we need to keep doing it, when studies show it has very little positive outcome. When it doesn't actually have a beneficial effect, and does worse at teaching children over other methods, why carry on with it? Sure, it works, but not well.

It's more so that you're coming off like being a parent gives no extra insight at all. If you're being dramatic and actually mean that it just doesn't mean you know better than anyone without a kid, Ill agree.

Also, I feel like Id need to read into these studies. A study is worth nothing if you do no research to how it was conducted. Just saying "This study" means nothing to me. If you had information about the study, I could actually take it serious. But anyone just using numbers and don't care to look any further into it obviously is just looking for numbers to support their beliefs. You don't care where or how those numbers actually came about. And if you do, show your work.

This is literally the tactic white people use to claim black people are way bigger criminals. When we all know that's manufactured by arrest rates and targeting.

^

That's an example, not a redirect. Please don't go into it further than it's use as an example

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HighOnSolar posted...

only for sport

lol

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Believing that hitting your kids is beneficial to them in the long run in 2020 is the same as still believing the Earth is flat or that humans aren't having an impact on climate change. The vast majority of medical experts have come to the same conclusion that hitting kids is not good for their development but you pick and choose anecdotal evidence to continue with your ignorant, outdated belief that you're actually parenting them thr right way.

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Lost_All_Senses posted...

It's more so that you're coming off like being a parent gives no extra insight at all. If you're being dramatic and actually mean that it just doesn't mean you know better than anyone without a kid, Ill agree.

Mostly mean the latter, yeah.

Not sure what to say other than >_____> to your example though. These studies are done by medical professionals that have nothing to gain from pushing one view or the other. If you want me to link you to some, I guess I can, but they are out there for you to read yourself to come to your own conclusion.

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Funkydog posted...

Mostly mean the latter, yeah.

Not sure what to say other than >_____> to your example though. These studies are done by medical professionals that have nothing to gain from pushing one view or the other. If you want me to link you to some, I guess I can, but they are out there for you to read yourself to come to your own conclusion.

I'm good. If I ever knock up someone, I'll give them a really hard look. I can promise you that much.

Also, for the record. I have a dog that I don't hit. Because nothing he does is malicious and I don't allow him in harms way in the first place. In a perfect world, they are not bad enough to ever need to be swatted. But most people who don't have kids have this fantasy in their head that they will have the golden plan and their kid won't ever have any bad or dangerous habits. Shits unrealistic. It's just a very final option. Like I said, when you feel like the alternative would be them learning their lesson through getting hit by a car or getting 2nd degree burns. Do you guys think your kid just isn't gonna hurt themselves? Or would you rather them get hurt worse, just so you don't have to be the one to "betray" them.

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Zodd3224 posted...

is the same as still believing the Earth is flat