Poll of the Day > People with ADHD. How can you help them?

(+) Yeah! (+)

My coworker has ADHD and she has been so supportive of my Aspergers-related shortcomings and I'd like to repay her by being supportive to her.

So at work she is often struggling to focus on the task at hand.
I constantly see her zipping around the workshop and chatting with the other coworkers instead of working.

She has told me that she wants to work but she's also easily distracted.
And there's also the fact that our other coworkers often start conversations with her when she's trying to work.

She's very talkative so I guess that's why so many people are always trying to talk with her and I think they fail to understand her situation.

I've been at her place twice and it's been a mess both times.
All kinds of stuff and papers and shit spread throughout her apartment.

I want to be supportive but I'm not quite sure how.

I knew a guy like that, but not sure how to help them besides encourage them to focus. as soon as the boss was gone he'd stop what he was doing and start talking; anything but do what he was supposed to do (but seemingly out of agitation not laziness).

I'm kind of the opposite where the more I work the more tunnel vision I get until I'm working on such a very specific detail that once I complete it I forget what the bigger picture even was. TODO lists help tremendously with this.

You'd probably want to talk to her about it, figure out what her boundaries are for what you can or can't do. It's a problem held within her effected by others, if she doesn't want you getting between her and others then there isn't a whole lot you can do.

You can't and they likely do not want your help. Sounds like your coworker is in good control and managing it appropriately.

Keep them busy

Metalsonic66 posted...

Keep them busy

I need to be kept busy or I start having anxiety attacks

Pray they find the focus God created them for.

Kyuubi4269 posted...

You'd probably want to talk to her about it, figure out what her boundaries are for what you can or can't do. It's a problem held within her effected by others, if she doesn't want you getting between her and others then there isn't a whole lot you can do.

Pretty much this. Individual cases of ADHD can vary quite a bit (like most mental disorders), so there's no blanket "do this to help" sort of advice that anyone can give. The next time she complains to you about her ADHD interfering with her work, just ask something like "is there anything I could do to help with that?". Don't necessarily push the issue too hard, though. As much as I know you want to be supportive, if she feels like she's managing well enough on her own and/or doesn't want your help, forcing it on her is just going to make things worse. Simply offering the support may be all you can do.

Judgmenl posted...

You can't and they likely do not want your help. Sounds like your coworker is in good control and managing it appropriately.

She's often late for work and she has threatened to quit a couple of times as she has been overwhelmed with work back when she used to be our appointed Safety Representative.

I think she did a great job as a Safety Representative but everyone saw how stressful it was to her.

adjl posted...

Pretty much this. Individual cases of ADHD can vary quite a bit (like most mental disorders), so there's no blanket "do this to help" sort of advice that anyone can give. The next time she complains to you about her ADHD interfering with her work, just ask something like "is there anything I could do to help with that?". Don't necessarily push the issue too hard, though. As much as I know you want to be supportive, if she feels like she's managing well enough on her own and/or doesn't want your help, forcing it on her is just going to make things worse. Simply offering the support may be all you can do.

She has said something similar to me.
She has told me that she'd gladly talk for me in certain situations because she knows how hard it can be for me to do so without help.

She has offered to help me with raising my salary because she thinks I don't get enough for the amount of work I do.

I accepted her help but afterwards I've started to reconsider and I think I'm gonna tell her that she doesn't have to do it.
She has enough stuff on her mind and I think she shouldn't have to deal with my stupid problems too.

I'm thinking about telling her that I appreciate her help but I think it's good enough that we discuss those things and then I'll try to summarize those things as best as I can to my boss.

Anyway, the next time I see her I'm gonna ask her if there's anything I can do to help or support her.

Is asking what's been troubling her too blunt?

I mean, she has been pretty blunt towards me sometimes when she has been overwhelmed by work or when she's on her period.

And I mean blunt as in I approach her and she just says "NO LEET, I CAN'T TALK RIGHT NOW!"

I feel like she's not doing it to be disrespectful.
It's just easier for both of us if she just immediately say exactly how it is because she knows being blunt and straightforward to me is the best way to make me understand the situation as I can be pretty bad to understand certain social cues.

I've been diagnosed with that and the only real unmedicated solution I can think of is just flat-out willpower, like anyone else, just more of it.

Or finding something that I actually want to do, that's worked better.