LogFAQs > #964371447

Judgmenl posted...

You can't and they likely do not want your help. Sounds like your coworker is in good control and managing it appropriately.

She's often late for work and she has threatened to quit a couple of times as she has been overwhelmed with work back when she used to be our appointed Safety Representative.

I think she did a great job as a Safety Representative but everyone saw how stressful it was to her.

adjl posted...

Pretty much this. Individual cases of ADHD can vary quite a bit (like most mental disorders), so there's no blanket "do this to help" sort of advice that anyone can give. The next time she complains to you about her ADHD interfering with her work, just ask something like "is there anything I could do to help with that?". Don't necessarily push the issue too hard, though. As much as I know you want to be supportive, if she feels like she's managing well enough on her own and/or doesn't want your help, forcing it on her is just going to make things worse. Simply offering the support may be all you can do.

She has said something similar to me.
She has told me that she'd gladly talk for me in certain situations because she knows how hard it can be for me to do so without help.

She has offered to help me with raising my salary because she thinks I don't get enough for the amount of work I do.

I accepted her help but afterwards I've started to reconsider and I think I'm gonna tell her that she doesn't have to do it.
She has enough stuff on her mind and I think she shouldn't have to deal with my stupid problems too.

I'm thinking about telling her that I appreciate her help but I think it's good enough that we discuss those things and then I'll try to summarize those things as best as I can to my boss.

Anyway, the next time I see her I'm gonna ask her if there's anything I can do to help or support her.

Is asking what's been troubling her too blunt?

I mean, she has been pretty blunt towards me sometimes when she has been overwhelmed by work or when she's on her period.

And I mean blunt as in I approach her and she just says "NO LEET, I CAN'T TALK RIGHT NOW!"

I feel like she's not doing it to be disrespectful.
It's just easier for both of us if she just immediately say exactly how it is because she knows being blunt and straightforward to me is the best way to make me understand the situation as I can be pretty bad to understand certain social cues.