Board 8 > Duke Nukem Forever is not good

(+) Yeah! (+)

of all the crazy things Vlado believes, "Duke Nukem Forever is good" may be the craziest

I've been playing a couple hours and it's just... lame. I'm shooting pig men with a shotgun while drinking beer and somehow it's boring.
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also they somehow had the audacity to make fun of Halo

punching a little above your weight class, guys
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At the midnight launch years ago, we put a copy into the PS3 to get people hyped and everyone saw how shitty it was

people started cancelling their preorders
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Some people probably had those preorders for like a decade
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Punnyz posted...

At the midnight launch years ago, we put a copy into the PS3 to get people hyped and everyone saw how shitty it was

people started cancelling their preorders

That's hilarious.

I bought it like five years ago because the collector's edition was deeply discounted and I wanted to add to my collection of casino-themed video game stuff (New Vegas and Dead Rising 2).

Didn't even take the plastic off the actual game box until today.
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I think Duke just made a Leroy Jenkins reference but it didn't really make sense in the context he said it in.
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Punnyz posted...

At the midnight launch years ago, we put a copy into the PS3 to get people hyped and everyone saw how shitty it was

people started cancelling their preorders

Hahahaha amazing.
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On top of that, one person bought the Balls of Steel edition and he kept hope that it would get better


he came back a week later to trade it in. He even gave us the extra crap that came with the CE. He didn't want ANY of it
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I came into this topic to make a Vlado joke, but I see you've already got it covered
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http://www.metacritic.com/game/pc/duke-nukem-forever
http://www.metacritic.com/game/ds/pokemon-mystery-dungeon-explorers-of-sky
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It's a very good game. While the mechanics are far from perfect, what with the regenerating health and the two-weapon limit, the Duke humour is alive and well. And that's the main thing that makes Duke games good.
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the Duke humor seems to mostly just be him saying lines from movies
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Underrated game IMO. I can honestly say that I enjoyed it more than "classics" like Bioshock and Half-Life 2.
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I still like it
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I don't think I've pre-ordered a game since Duke Nukem Forever. Maybe the Witness, I forget...and there have been some day two-purchases, but DNF sucked out loud and has really put me on the defensive with blind purchases since then.
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Punnyz posted...

At the midnight launch years ago, we put a copy into the PS3 to get people hyped and everyone saw how shitty it was

people started cancelling their preorders

Amazing. Simply amazing
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r111yx2XvkA

Also, one of the best vids the best friends ever did imo

this is...it's not how things are supposed to BE! I wanna shoot bullets!

*gets a gun shooting bullets*

THIS GUN FEELS TERRIBLE!
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I bought this at Walmart, it was on a deep discount within a year of release.
Basically got it as a novelty and it's still wrapped.

I also got it for 3 of my friends as Christmas presents.
That was a fun year.
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Vlado can only afford a few games and the ones he can are good-great at the very least. The ones he can't are automatically bad.

For example: Zelda: Breath of the Wild has a 97 metascore. But according to Vlado logic, Nintendo bribed all the professional reviewers to lie to us and give false review scores because he hasn't played it. Therefore it can't possibly be that good.

Duke Nukem Forever has been called a major disappointment and a trash by both fans and reviewers. All that after taking 'Forever' to come out. But according to Vlado logic, because he probably paid full price for it, it is a good game. Otherwise it would justify his stupidity in spending $60 on a trash game.

What I'm saying is, you're looking in the wrong place if you're relying on Vlado's tastes to play a good game.
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Axl_Rose_85 posted...

What I'm saying is, you're looking in the wrong place if you're relying on Vlado's tastes to play a good game.

it was a joke, as in "vlado is a blatantly vitriolic bigot with awful views on woman, gender, sexuality and *looks at list* ... people with dyed hair, but what's really crazy is that he loves duke nukem forever."

the joke is that vlado is bad and duke nukem forever is bad
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Nanis23 posted...

http://www.metacritic.com/game/pc/duke-nukem-forever
http://www.metacritic.com/game/ds/pokemon-mystery-dungeon-explorers-of-sky

And this is why no one should ever take Metacritic seriously
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I thought it was a fine game. It pretty much had to be the best game ever not to disappoint and it was nowhere near that, but fine.
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Axl_Rose_85 posted...

For example: Zelda: Breath of the Wild has a 97 metascore. But according to Vlado logic, Nintendo bribed all the professional reviewers to lie to us and give false review scores because he hasn't played it. Therefore it can't possibly be that good.

lmao @ these mental gymnastics. I only quoted gamers, who scored the game like 15 points lower. Their opinions are far more important than those of corrupt game "journalists."

Axl_Rose_85 posted...

Duke Nukem Forever has been called a major disappointment and a trash by both fans and reviewers. All that after taking 'Forever' to come out. But according to Vlado logic, because he probably paid full price for it, it is a good game. Otherwise it would justify his stupidity in spending $60 on a trash game.

I actually pre-ordered the limited edition! Well, with the Duke bust being near my desk, I suppose I feel even more attached to it, but here we're talking strictly about the game itself! How much money I spent doesn't matter.

Axl_Rose_85 posted...

What I'm saying is, you're looking in the wrong place if you're relying on Vlado's tastes to play a good game.

Actually, I write excellent reviews. :) In fact, I happen to be publishing one in a short while. :)

iiicon posted...

it was a joke, as in "vlado is a blatantly vitriolic bigot with awful views on woman, gender, sexuality and *looks at list* ... people with dyed hair, but what's really crazy is that he loves duke nukem forever."

the joke is that vlado is bad and duke nukem forever is bad

lol @ being this bitter that I expose SJWs' delusions.
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Vlado is such a cloaca.

That being said, I'm not informed enough (or interested enough to be informed) to judge Duke Nukem Forever.
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Vlado posted...

Actually, I write excellent reviews. :) In fact, I happen to be publishing one in a short while. :)

Your modesty never fails to blow my mind.

Don't know whether your reviews are good or not. Never read one nor do I care to ever do so.

Your narrow minded perception and narcissism however, have not changed a bit. Keep it up. I love watching you make a fool out of yourself everytime you type something. Seriously never change.
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Nanis23 posted...

http://www.metacritic.com/game/pc/duke-nukem-forever
http://www.metacritic.com/game/ds/pokemon-mystery-dungeon-explorers-of-sky

Explorers of Sky is great what the hell is this.
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red13n posted...

Nanis23 posted...

http://www.metacritic.com/game/pc/duke-nukem-forever
http://www.metacritic.com/game/ds/pokemon-mystery-dungeon-explorers-of-sky

Explorers of Sky is great what the hell is this.

Metacritic.

And also why I prefer to judge games myself rather than listen to the popular opinion.

Though in this case, from what little I've seen, it looks like DNF is a game I wouldn't like anyways.

And I just wanted to call someone a cloaca.
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MoogleKupo141 posted...

the Duke humor seems to mostly just be him saying lines from movies

That's basically top-line humor in Bulgaria.
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red13n posted...

Nanis23 posted...

http://www.metacritic.com/game/pc/duke-nukem-forever
http://www.metacritic.com/game/ds/pokemon-mystery-dungeon-explorers-of-sky

Explorers of Sky is great what the hell is this.

so is Duke Nukem Forever
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Emeraldegg posted...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r111yx2XvkA

Also, one of the best vids the best friends ever did imo

this is...it's not how things are supposed to BE! I wanna shoot bullets!

*gets a gun shooting bullets*

THIS GUN FEELS TERRIBLE!

that's the worst part. I could excuse it not being funny if the part where you shoot things was good, but it isn't.

Bulletstorm came out the same year and did asshole dialogue and shooting dudes so much better.
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Vlado posted...

It's a very good game.

Nope.

I will give it credit for its air hockey simulation though.
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Axl_Rose_85 posted...

Your modesty never fails to blow my mind.

Don't know whether your reviews are good or not. Never read one nor do I care to ever do so.

Your narrow minded perception and narcissism however, have not changed a bit. Keep it up. I love watching you make a fool out of yourself everytime you type something. Seriously never change.

>being this obsessed with a stranger on the internet

MoogleKupo141 posted...

I will give it credit for its air hockey simulation though.

It's little things like this that make the game even better.
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wait, what's wrong with dyed hair
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Gatarix posted...

wait, what's wrong with dyed hair

It automatically makes you a filthy liberal SJW, doncha know?
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Next thing bitter liberals will say about me is that I said people drinking water were evil... lmao
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Vlado posted...

people drinking water were evil.

j/k
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I think one of the biggest offenses about Duke Nukem Forever though is how -- although it's kinda fun to play around with the little touches in the game like the whiteboard -- the FIRST THING the game teaches you is how to pick up a piece of shit from a toilet and throw it. If I remember right, you begin the game right in front of a commode that you can then look down and be instructed to pick up the turd, which you can then throw.

And I'm not saying cut that feature! But the game's not based around poop-flinging combat and the focus of these little shallow moments over the introduction and quality of the gameplay always irked me.
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It's little things like this that make the game even better.

but most of the little things are not good

Specifically, the pool physics are really bad and the pinball is super frustrating.
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HaRRicH posted...

I think one of the biggest offenses about Duke Nukem Forever though is how -- although it's kinda fun to play around with the little touches in the game like the whiteboard -- the FIRST THING the game teaches you is how to pick up a piece of shit from a toilet and throw it. If I remember right, you begin the game right in front of a commode that you can then look down and be instructed to pick up the turd, which you can then throw.

And I'm not saying cut that feature! But the game's not based around poop-flinging combat and the focus of these little shallow moments over the introduction and quality of the gameplay always irked me.

Yeah I'm gonna be honest, if I had been waiting for Duke Nukem Forever for, well, forever, and this was the first thing that I got to do as the player, I'd probably immediately eject the disk and never touch it again.

Grossout humor should've died with the 90s.
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Gross-out humor always has a home as long as South Park is around. Even in video games, the Stick of Truth gloriously has you fighting under your parents while they're fucking...and that should exist until the end of time, no matter how much dookie the Duke handles when you turn on the game.
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HaRRicH posted...

Gross-out humor always has a home as long as South Park is around.

Another reason to hate South Park.
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Haha, pretty sure we've had that conversation before...!
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I've played through the whole thing. I wouldn't call it a good game, but some of the level design is actually pretty good, the level where you're shrunk in the restaurant is pretty cool in this way. But the controls are awful, the humor falls flat, and there's too much bullshit like rail gun sections, etc that ruin any potential.

HaRRicH posted...

Haha, pretty sure we've had that conversation before...!

Probably XD
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BowserCuffs posted...

Grossout humor should've died with the 90s.

It's thrived since then 10-fold.
Heck it was even a huge success this E3 with Devolver.
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LOLIAmAnAlt posted...

BowserCuffs posted...

Grossout humor should've died with the 90s.

It's thrived since then 10-fold.
Heck it was even a huge success this E3 with Devolver.

:(
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HaRRicH posted...

Gross-out humor always has a home as long as South Park is around. Even in video games, the Stick of Truth gloriously has you fighting under your parents while they're fucking...and that should exist until the end of time, no matter how much dookie the Duke handles when you turn on the game.

I just completed South Park and got 1000/1000 achievement points for it like 3 or 4 days ago. At least they give you an achievement for throwing s*** at someone.lol
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