Lurker > Snake5555555555

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TopicMost Quotable: Metal Gear Solid / South Park ||| Seinfeld / Yu-Gi-Oh! Abridged
Snake5555555555
06/30/19 11:48:29 AM
#15
Metal Gear Solid
Seinfeld
---
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TopicBoard 8's Top 100 Video Games - Voting Phase 1
Snake5555555555
06/30/19 1:05:18 AM
#12
SH2 & RE4 were in already so:

Outlast 2
Parasite Eve
---
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TopicBoard 8's Top 100 Video Games - Voting Phase 1
Snake5555555555
06/30/19 1:03:40 AM
#11
Resident Evil (2002)
Resident Evil 4
Silent Hill 2
Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater
Silent Hill 3
Spec Ops: The Line
Max Payne 3
Batman: Arkham Asylum
Haunting Ground
Rule of Rose
Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory
Devil May Cry
Dino Crisis
Resident Evil 2 (1998)
Fatal Frame II: Crimson Butterfly
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 8:41:19 PM
#182
It's such a shame we'll never get the full experience of Event Horizon.
---
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 8:35:48 PM
#180
Outlier

Genny - 134
Inviso - 132
Charon - 118
KBM - 108
Johnbobb - 81
Karo - 81
Scarlet - 67
JONA - 57
Snake - 52

Genny claims the top spot from Vis!
---
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 8:30:12 PM
#179
Inviso - This movie manages to really set a creepy stage for the vast majority of its runtime. The slow devolution of the crew as theyre tormented by hallucinations is great, as is the general breaking down of societal norms as the demonic energy permeating the ship threatens to take control. However, after creating such an eerie setting, I feel like the film rushes the ending far too much. The entire cast is still alive going into like, the last 20 minutes, and then its just kill after kill after kill. Its a pacing problem more than anything. Also, if you know anything about my tastes from Doctor Who, I love a good base-under-siege story. It gives a chance to develop a large cast and flesh them out. But in this, its really only three characters that get fleshed out, and then a bunch of kill fodder. Its unfortunate, because I feel like there couldve been a lot more in terms of psychological horror, rather than just having Sam Neill go crazy and start killing everyone. So yeahsolid concept that just couldnt stick the landing, unfortunately.

Genny - What do you get when you take the haunted house concept and make the house a space ship instead? Event Horizon dares to ask this question. It's a refreshing concept I wish was utilized more in any media. Space horror when done correctly can be edge-of-your-seat thrilling. That said, Event Horizon doesn't really do it justice. The sense of isolation is there, as is the necessary cabin fever victim, but as interesting as the premise is I couldn't help but feel it let me down. 7.1/10

Scarlet - Imagine how much work it takes to save one of the worst scripts Ive ever seen. Thats no exaggeration. Its complete and utter nonsense. But the work put in by two phenomenal talents (Lawrence Fishburne, Sam Neill) and the sheer ridiculous effects work at least turns this script into memorable crap. Which is better than being unmemorable crap. That said, the film is heavily reliant on jump scares to turn this I wish I could make Alien pipe dream into something more. It apes pieces of things other sci fi horror films do well, but without understanding what makes them work.
Rating: 27/100


Johnbobb - Anyone else get some Flatliners vibes from this? But like, less good. There's definitely an attempt here; good set design, decent action, but it ultimately just came off way more corny than scary. The performances are inconsistent and sometimes even cringey (not helped by weak dialogue), and the plot ended up being considerably less interesting than the concept might let on. It's over-the-top and overacted in a way that definitely doesn't match the one it seems to want.

JONA - The movie has an interesting concept and setting but it just ends up being kinda dull.

KBM - Oh, Paul W.S. Anderson. The fact that the best movie you've ever made is 2002's Resident Evil adaptation is very telling. This mess of a sci-fi horror film features the worst Sam Neill performance I have seen, and that includes Jurassic Park III. The rest of the cast doesn't fare much better, but it's not like they have any good (or even coherent) material to work with. Some of the visuals are nice, but with a story this muddled, derivative, and ultimately insubstantial, that only carries you through part of the first act before you realize that it's all just going to get steadily worse from here.
---
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 8:30:02 PM
#178
26. Event Horizon

Karo - 16
Snake - 18
Charon - 22
Inviso - 22
Genny - 24
Scarlet - 27
Johnbobb - 30
JONA - 33
KBM - 36

Karo - A crew sent to rescue a lost space flight finds to their dismay that everyone went insane and killed each other while speaking latin. So the ominously named Event Horizon is a vessel that has the scientifically dubious ability to generate black holes inside itself and use them to jump through spacetime. They then like enter the wrong stargate address or something and open a portal to hell by accident. Dealing with something other than the cliched space aliens is refreshing, though unfortunately when you really break things down the movie is essentially a generic store brand Alien, only minus the actual alien and the ship is evil or some shit like that. There is nothing majorly wrong with the film, but it is hard to get excited when you have a plot you have seen a million times before and a supporting cast that is either forgettable, or memorable for all the wrong reasons. The result is something that cannot quite escape the event horizon of mediocrity

Snake - Why I Chose It - Though a troubled production and a vastly cut down final product doomed this film before it even premiered, Event Horizon has managed to maintain a strong fanbase with strong home video sales. It has influenced many subsequent sci-fi properties, most notably the Dead Space series.

My Thoughts- The fact I enjoy Event Horizon as much as I do despite all its glaring issues both behind and in front of the camera I think means there's something really solid here. Laurence Fishburne & Sam Neill deliver great performances despite a wonky script, and I absolutely love this film's lonely, dread-filled atmosphere. I think the ship design of the Event Horizon is really unique, especially the gravity drive room. The ship feels properly Eldritch despite being man-made, and I love that the ship is the actual antagonist, always present, always watching. The film's psychological moments are also really effective, especially juxtaposed with the more traditional viscera and gore associated with horror. In general, the blood in this is properly unsettling and gruesome. I think the ending kind of falls flat for me, but the journey is well worth it.

Charon - An eerie film that doesn't quite reach the levels of greatness you can sense just beneath the surface; it's hard to tell what holds it back. Event Horizon is a space horror that also blends in elements of psychological horror, which in theory should propel the movie into greatness. For me, it just never quite makes it there but I still really enjoy the concept and want to like it a whole lot more than I do. It puts me in mind a good bit of As Above, So Below on that note, another film which has a similar sort of "this place knows my darkest secrets" touch to it that I want to really love. As a concept, this movie is great, but the execution just leaves something out. I think it needed more darkness, more actual scares in there with it. Oh, and don't forget we didn't need another funny black man. That said, at least this film didn't seem to be quite as racist as some of the others here.
---
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Topic^King of the Mountain^ - Save My Shapeshifter - Day 5
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 8:14:19 PM
#79
Bigby
---
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Topic^King of the Mountain^ - Save My Shapeshifter - Day 5
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 7:13:08 PM
#61
Eddie van Blundht
---
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Topic[BIGE] R2 D5: HollowKnight v ToTheMoon, Braid v BOI:R, TB2: Bastion v EdithFinch
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 7:12:36 PM
#6
-
The Binding of Isaac: Rebirth
Double Tiebreaker:What Remains of Edith Finch
---
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TopicSnake Ranks Movie, TV and Video Game Scenes *RANKINGS*
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 7:01:10 PM
#83
56. The sloth DMV scene
Origin: Zootopia (2016)
Nominated by: PrinceKaro (1/4 remaining)


Though this scene kind of got too over-exposed for me at a certain point, there's no denying the great craftsmanship and care put into this scene. It's genius, and pretty much writes itself. While I don't think it's necessarily the best joke in a movie full of 'em, I think in particular the voice acting and character reactions are just about pitch-perfect. Nick really shines in this scene especially; I think his joke and the sloth's delayed laugh is so, so good.
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Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicSnake Ranks Movie, TV and Video Game Scenes *RANKINGS*
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 6:32:26 PM
#81
57. Soda Sizes
Origin: Parks and Recreation (Soda Tax, S5E2, 2012)
Nominated by: TheCodeIsBosco (0/4 remaining *ELIMINATED*)


Great simple scene that combines visual comedy with the natural comedic timing of the great cast. Just the simple thing of seeing the soda cups in all their giant glory and huge size written plain on it is the perfect visual gag. That combined with great quotes like "if the child were liquefied" really make this scene laugh-out-loud worthy.
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Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicSnake Ranks Movie, TV and Video Game Scenes *RANKINGS*
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 6:20:42 PM
#78
58. Galufs Finest Hour
Origin: Final Fantasy V (1992)
Nominated by: Redrocket (0/4 remaining *ELIMINATED*)


This scene is a pretty great example of how you can tell a compelling just using 16-bit graphics. Despite the goofy looking sprites and having only readable dialogue, the game draws you in with compelling music and fantastic character motivation. It always runs the risk of being too cheesy, like when the four crystals zap the party, but Galuf's ultimate triumph is an uproarious celebration of the human spirit. I also love how gameplay segregates into this, positioning Galuf as invincible in the presence of this great dark knight, pushing the boundaries of the story even more. It ends on a sad moment, but great build-up makes it so Galuf's sacrifice wasn't wasted.
---
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Topic^King of the Mountain^ - Save My Shapeshifter - Day 5
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 6:12:42 PM
#34
Freddy Krueger
---
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Topic^King of the Mountain^ - Save My Shapeshifter - Day 5
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 5:12:05 PM
#12
Carnage
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TopicBest of the Trope Season 2: Day 191 - Cruel and Unusual Death
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 4:52:59 PM
#12
Stuffed in a Freddy Fazbear suit (Five Nights at Freddy's)

Robin accidentally killed by A-Train (The Boys)

Heather's death (Ash vs. Evil Dead)
---
Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 1:32:58 PM
#175
Johnbobb - I never know how to rate or rank "so bad it's good" movies. This is a horribly acted, horribly written movie that is funny as hell because of it. Well, for the most part; there are more than a few boring lore scenes that literally nobody cares about. However, I also have to deduct points for it not even being the best take on this same concept (looking at you, Needful Things). Try a little harder, Wishmaster.

Scarlet - This movie, about a young boy who is whisked away to the storybook realm that librarians and LeVar Burton claim resides within every book, attempts to take a truly all-star voice cast and roll them into a Magic School Bus style bit of edutainment which teaches us that books are fun. Too bad that the star of the film pretty much demonstrates that only the most bullied and heckled geeks in the school hierarchy are privy to this exclusive realm of magic. Its an even tougher sell with a script that, ironically, isnt a page-turner.
Rating: 20/100


Snake - Why I Chose It - The Djinn has become a moderate horror icon with a series of three sequels. Wishmaster is also an all-star celebration of the most famous actors and filmmakers in horror, directed by special effects wizard Robert Kurtzman, produced by Wes Craven, composed by Harry Manfredini, and featuring actors like Robert Englund, Angus Scrimm, Tony Todd, & Kane Hodder, just to name a few.

My Thoughts - I want so badly to like this movie more than I do. The Djinn is a pretty cool concept for an antagonist and overall I think he looks pretty good, and I love seeing all the cameos like some sort of horror MCU. However, this movie is just overall really dull beyond a few gore scenes and the Djinn concept isn't pushed as much as I would've liked.

Karo - An evil djinn is released from a gem and he sets out to give the three wishes that will free his kind and doom mankind as we know it. Perhaps this genie would have opened the portal to his world by now if he didn't fucking maim and murder every single person he comes across. Surely a being as old and powerful as him should understand the concept of enough intrigue and subterfuge to convince a master for long enough to achieve his goals that all this wishing wont make him grow an extra arm out of his anus. So the movie breaks down as follows: the genie meets someone who makes an ill advised or poorly worded wish. Oh nooo this isnt what I wished for! Cue a lot of screaming and excessive use of motion blur. Repeat. It is hard to tell which is worse, the terrible acting or the idiotic script. An evil counterpoint to the friendly Robin Williams genie is an intriguing concept but this is just so so terribly made and I wish it never existed.
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Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 1:32:48 PM
#174
27. Wishmaster

Genny - 7
Charon - 20
KBM - 23
JONA - 24
Inviso - 26
Johnbobb - 27
Scarlet - 34
Snake - 35
Karo - 36

Genny - Wishmaster and its sequels were my childhood guilty pleasures. I always loved the way the Djinn spoke with such intimidation and gravitas. The methods in which he kills his victims and/or claims their souls is as creative as it is random. Does anyone know why some of his victims are free to live for a couple days while others are insta-killed? No? Cool. At any rate an evil genie that intentionally corrupts your wishes is a unique concept that I adore. In fact the only major gripe I have with this movie is the terrible decisions made by the protagonist, but I guess you wouldn't have a plot without that! 8.5/10

Charon - The lead villain is almost good enough to create an enduring horror franchise as the love letter it sends to the those pays tribute to; almost. Yes this film did end up with a number of sequels, but all of those came straight to DVD. I feel like the Djinn was almost good enough to warrant the sort of series we have seen from the actors that appear within, namely ones like Englund and Hodder. He has a good stage presence and even though he's sort of a combination of Freddy and Pinhead, he's a pretty cool villain. I'd guess the reason why Wishmaster isn't quite as revered as some of the other horror franchises is that the backstory of the character is more difficult to touch upon. I'm not sure really. But I liked this movie, and I think the makeup here has held up extremely well considering the film and budget.

KBM - It hurts me to put Wishmaster even this low because it was so damn much fun to watch. However I can't technically make the argument that it's a good or smart overall movie. What I can say is that Divoff's performance in the title role is absolutely magnetic, and between that and the gleefully over-the-top gore, campy B-movie special effects, and creative death scenes, Wishmaster satisfied this particular horror fan. The veritable parade of guest stars from other horror franchises was also a lot of fun, and the actors were well-used in their cameo roles (I particularly enjoyed Tony Todd's scene as a growling bouncer who gets himself a hell of a death scene, and Kane Hodder the best Jason Vorhees appearing as a security guard who the Djinn quite literally goes through.)

JONA - This movie is pretty schlocky but I also found it pretty fun, pretty much because of the Djinns gimmick. I always liked the corrupted wish angle and it gets some mileage here.

Inviso - Ive never seen a single movie in the Hellraiser franchise (Ive seen scenes, but never a full film), yet based on what I know about Hellraiser, this film feels like someone took the concept of Hellraiser and merged it with the concept of Nightmare on Elm Street, to create a bizarre amalgamation of weird, mythological creature horror. The movie is goofy as shit, with the weird contrivance of the djinn needing people to ask him for something in order to use his powers, only for him to turn around and ruin their wish. Some of those ruined wishes are so hilariously contrived that you cant help but laugh at them, either. Ultimately though, while I appreciate a movie that you cant take too seriously, I wish this didnt go so completely cheesy like it did. It detracts from the wackiness of some of the kills when the djinn randomly goes to a shop and turns a girl into a mannequin just for shits and giggles. So yeahinteresting concept, but not perfect.
---
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TopicMost Quotable: Lord of the Rings / The Office ||| Forrest Gump / Castlevania
Snake5555555555
06/29/19 11:42:09 AM
#15
The Office
Forrest Gump
---
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Topic^King of the Mountain^ - Save My Shapeshifter - Day 4
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 11:03:00 PM
#94
Eddie Van Blundht
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Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 11:02:37 PM
#173
Outlier

Inviso - 127
Genny - 112
Charon - 107
KBM - 94
Johnbobb - 77
Karo - 62
Scarlet - 54
JONA - 47
Snake - 36

Charon makes a huge jum into the hundreds, and JONA makes his first huge jump as well, leaving Snake alone at the bottom.
---
Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 10:50:42 PM
#170
Charon - A film that clearly should have been a series, Nightbreed suffers from a bloated cast we're supposed to care about a world that's never properly explained. What strikes me the most is the way characters discuss Midian. It's like... "oh yeah, Midian, I've heard of it. I'll be right there", but in reality Midian is just this random graveyard but people discuss it like it's a town even before they know what it is. There's some promise here, I mean I do like the lead character well enough and the villain is also decent, but they kinda get buried here by some freaky nonsense here and there. I really feel that this would have found a better home in a series or miniseries; there seems to be a lot of universe to expand upon that never really was, and even with the way the movie ended they sort of hint at that as well. It's not necessarily a bad movie, just a little bit clumsy.

Genny - Nightbreed drops you into a world where nothing is explained thoroughly enough. The Nightbreed are an intriguing concept as a race, and I wanted to like the movie based on the premise alone, but it ends up being just okay. 6.5/10

Karo - So there is apparently this hidden city in the woods filled with people in silly makeup called the nightbreed, and some guy goes there and becomes one of them and they all fight some dipshit rednecks while constantly cutting to a shot of some random ghoul leering at the camera with some shit-faced smirk because that is supposed to be like scary or something. The nightbreed themselves are an inconstant assortment of rejected horror movie concept art brought to life by people who constantly change their minds throughout the story on whether they want their monsters to be grotesque or sympathetic. It doesnt help things that the film is incompetently directed and written with no sense of direction or pacing. Plot elements are thrown out willy-nilly and then soon forgotten, the tone of the movie shifts wildly between any given scene, and it is impossible to form any sort of connection to anything that is going on. In the wake of all this unpleasntry we are left with a confusing mess of a movie that doesnt know what the hell it wants to be. Is it a slasher movie with Mr. Sackhead? Is it the story of a man turning into a monster after being bitten? It is a moral fable about bigotry? Is it the result of consuming way too much weed? It is somehow all of these cliched things simultaneously, and all of them poorly. Please keep the creators of this film far far away from any more movie cameras, and for the love of god don't let them breed. In the night or otherwise.

Inviso - This movie was stupid. LikeIm genuinely confused by the plot and what the point was. There were too many characters that just got flung at the screen without properly explaining the purpose behind them. I dont completely understand why the serial killer psychotherapist had it out for Boone? Like, I get using him as a fall guybut why would you use him as a fall guy for crimes that no one really had any lead on? The movie also introduces a priest over halfway through its runtime, and suddenly he becomes a major character forreasons? And hell, even the plot of the Nightbreed themselves seemed unsure as to whether it was possible to portray them as good guys. This film was just trying too hard to be both creepy AND fantasy, and it didnt work for me on either end of the spectrum.
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 10:50:31 PM
#169
28. Nightbreed

JONA - 17
Johnbobb - 19
KBM - 22
Snake - 23
Scarlet - 24
Charon - 28
Genny - 29
Karo - 34
Inviso - 37

JONA - The movie has a pretty strong start and sets things up to be very engaging. The middle kind of falls flat at times and it started to run a bit too long but the climax is incredible. It was cool to see what the Nightbreed were capable of instead of being just window dressing for a good part of the movie.

Johnbobb - I got some strong Dark City vibes from this. It's not something I'd call objectively good. A lot of the performances are pretty weak and some of it is kind of dumb, but it still stands out because of how creative it is. Nightbreed presents a unique, bizarre reality and dives headfirst into it, quickly going from intriguing to crazy to pure batshit, in a (mostly) good way. The character designs are distinct and wild and the action is thrilling, and from a movie like this, that's about all I can ask for.

KBM - A super-entertaining mess of a movie (a trend in this part of the list, to be sure), this has a whole lot of unique ideas that it doesn't always quite know how to get across. I watched the director's cut, and even in that context there are some baffling aspects of this movie but then again, it's possible that, considering this was planned to be the first movie of a trilogy, we as an audience aren't necessarily meant to understand everything that's going on. Nevertheless, it's certainly an entertaining, fascinating movie, with some incredibly creative production design and visuals, and strong performances, especially from David Cronenberg as the ghoulish, unhinged psychotherapist. The unique mythology of this universe was enough on its own to draw me in, and I do kind of wish we'd gotten follow-up films.

Snake - Why I Chose It - Though far from the most financially successful film on this list, the years have been kind to Barker's passion project, becoming a cult film that feels destined to be realized in its entirety. With almost enough re-releases and cuts to make Blade Runner blush, Nightbreed is a shining example of horror creativity that I think deserves a wider audience, no matter how imperfect.

My Thoughts - I don't think I've ever seen a film as weird, wonderful, and woefully incomplete as Nightbreed. Through the various cuts of this I've seen (with a 3-hour cut to come), Nightbreed has never felt like a complete movie to me. Yet, there's so much I love, from Cronenberg's doctor/killer combo to the Nightbreed themselves, beautiful, complex creatures that mirror the outcasts of humanity in a touching way. On the flip-side however, is a too complex mythology not fit for 90 minute or 145 minute or even a 180 minute run-time. Things are not explained well enough to become compelling, instead begging for a TV adaptation to let things grow and breathe naturally. Besides that though, Nightbreed deserves to be seen despite its faults, and it's a world I never mind returning to over and over again.

Scarlet - There is some depth hidden in this movie, a commentary on the nature of being an outcast in society, but by and large the practical effects and the camp made me yearn for the appearance of one Buffy Summers at some point to put this cast out of its misery. And, quite frankly, the entire film plays like an episode of a Buffyverse show, sans the parts of it that are actually watchable. A lot of this movie in general just seems to hedge its bets on keeping itself a cliffhanger-esque ending and inconsistent character arcs that leave you guessing as to whether is movie is at all a step up from the slash movie drivel of the previous decade.
Rating: 31/100

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Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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Topic^King of the Mountain^ - Save My Shapeshifter - Day 4
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 10:02:35 PM
#74
Freddy Krueger
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Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 8:00:37 PM
#167
Snake - Why I Chose It - Between its cast of fresh faces and experienced veterans alike (including horror mainstays Brad Dourif and Robert Englund), and the way this film reintroduced urban legends into the public conscious, Urban Legend was a box office hit and produced a small franchise of two sequels.

My Thoughts - This film has potential in its concept, but fails utterly in scripting, characters, and performances. This film has a strange midnight movie feel but without the curiosity or realistic constraints of one, creating a mood that never really feels right or in-line with what the film really wants the tone to be. Of all the Scream-inspired films on this list, I also think this feels the most like a straight-rip of that formula, replacing horror films with the titular urban legends instead.

Johnbobb - This was... something? I was intrigued by the idea of Urban Legends manifesting in reality, created and made true by the collective conscious of the public. But that's not what it is, of course. In the end, it's a forgettable slasher where nobody is really worth caring about and where the urban legends come across as serving less as inspiration and more as easy screenwriting.

KBM - Another example of what went horribly wrong with the slasher genre in the late '90s. What a weird era it was when someone like Tara Reid could be taken seriously as a Hollywood actress. Bland, mindless, and annoying, with a bunch of teenagers who are stupid even by horror movie standards, this is a movie that's shamelessly trying to copy other movies that weren't even that good to begin with. None of the characters are interesting (with the exception of one somewhat likable security guard who isn't in enough of the movie), the kills are too self-consciously referential to be any fun, and even Robert Englund is wasted in a too-obvious red herring of a role. Brad Dourif is here too, and he also gets next to nothing to do (a travesty in any situation where an over the top Dourif performance might partially redeem a schlocky movie). The movie finally doubles down on its stupidity when the killer is revealed and literally starts playing a slide show to demonstrate how and why they did the things they did.
---
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 8:00:31 PM
#166
29. Urban Legend

Charon -11
JONA - 21
Genny - 26
Scarlet - 26
Karo - 27
Inviso - 28
Snake - 32
Johnbobb - 33
KBM - 38

Charon - Stands tall amongst the Scream inspired horror wave of the late 90's with its clever use of diversion and multitude of possible suspects. Of all the films on this project, this one probably surprised me the most. We watched this one near the end of the list, and I expected a pretty straightforward slasher film. Instead I found this one to be full of surprises. It was probably the only film on the project that actually kept me guessing until the end. While the payoff was underwhelming considering how much I loved the buildup to it, this was still a pleasant treat.

JONA - This is probably higher than it should be but a murder mystery with themed murders appeals to me. However, the characters are nothing special and I did have a problem with the reveal, but that gets kinda handwaved by the ending.

Genny - In Urban Legend we have a really cool concept for a movie botched by its execution and terrible conclusion. That woman's plan made zero sense if she was just going to kill the man she was framing and that makes me beyond frustrated. Oh well. 6.9/10

Scarlet - In yet another attempt to create a 90s version of the Brat Pack, a surprisingly loaded cast is handed a fairly generic teen slasher script that hinges on one slightly interesting gimmick. Can the Joker, Peter Bishop, Lex Luthor and Bunny Lebowski salvage this tapioca of a film? Nope. And this failed Brat Pack reboot would slink into obscurity quite quickly.
Rating: 28/100


Karo - A serial killer terrorizes a small college with murders that mimic urban legends, and does the world a favor by offing all the worthless little shits that live there. Everyone is really stupid and acts in an unbelievable manner. Hey, someone was just decapitated so lets go drive out into the middle of nowhere at midnight in a car that doesnt start properly. Seems like a good plan! The film is full of plot elements that make sense individually but are nonsensical as a whole. For example, why would Paul freak out at the girls looking in the trunk if he didnt put the body there? Why would the killer leave the body in the trunk anyway? To try and get the boy she loves arrested for murder? Idiocy like this runs rampant throughout the entire movie and the script seems written by someone who just wanted to go 'gotcha' as much as possible without any thought of consequences. If only this film's existence was the sole myth here.

Inviso - This movies greatest selling point is also its biggest failing. By virtue of taking urban legends and applying them to a serial kills MO, you have some unique and inspired kills. However, the contrivance needed to make those kills happen ispretty terrible. Every scene is fucking awkward, and you have this psychotic killer whose motivation makes no sense beyond seeking revenge against the two girls that ruined her life. Killing all of those other peopleparticularly those that the main character didnt give a shit about, felt pointless. It doesnt help that the cast feels completely underdeveloped, and ultimately like they only exist to be victims in scenes completely detached from the central character. For fucks sake, douchebag character has his dog microwaved in a bustling house party, and then he himself is tied up and murdered in a bathroom at that same partyand no one discovers this. Nor do they care when Tara Reid is getting murdered. Its hard to tolerate that, because the uniqueness of the kills isnt forgivable.
---
Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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Topic^King of the Mountain^ - Save My Shapeshifter - Day 4
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 7:47:00 PM
#17
Carnage
---
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Topic[BIGE] R2 D4: ShovelKnight v CaveStory, DDLC v INSIDE, TB: Bastion v Edith Finch
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 7:46:48 PM
#9
Shovel Knight
Doki Doki Literature Club!
Tiebreaker: What Remains of Edith Finch
---
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TopicBest of the Trope Season 2: Day 190 - Clipped Wing Angel
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 5:02:34 PM
#4
Testuo's final form (Akira)
Brundle Fly fused with the teleporter (The Fly)
Wesker's Uroboros transformation (Resident Evil 5)
---
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 1:43:42 PM
#159
Outlier

Inviso - 117
Genny - 108
Charon - 89
KBM - 79
Johnbobb - 64
Karo - 54
Scarlet - 47
JONA - 28
Snake - 28

Everyone stays firm, but Genny enters the one-hundred club.
---
Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 1:34:13 PM
#158
Scarlet - The worst part of Hollywood, aside from the Dementors, is the ever-present necessity to go to a well. Everything is a well to Hollywood, and as long as theres still a bit of liquid left to squeeze out of the damn thing, you can rest assured that youll be handed a hackneyed script rife with repeats of something that came before. And said something doesnt even have to be good. It just has to exist. Aside from some great delivery here and there by Brad Dourif, this entire film is an exercise in just how bad a film can get before airlines wont run them to lure their passengers into mindless stupors on overseas connecting flights to European countries. And not even the good ones. The Vlado ones.
Rating: 23/100


Johnbobb - Before even starting this list, I assumed this would end up on the bottom. I never saw the first Child's Play, and that wasn't an accident. If there's one extremely specific subgenre of horror I hate, it's fucking living dolls. I don't know what it is about them. It's not that they're scary, just that they're so creepy and unpleasant that it makes me physically uncomfortable to watch them. That alone is reason enough for me to dislike this movie, but on top of that, it's just REALLY bad. The puppetry of Chucky is laughable, the performances kind of suck, the characters are all terrible in various ways (bonus points to the foster parents that left a Chucky doll in the closet before giving the room to the kid traumatized by the Chucky doll). Chucky himself is the worst of all though. Not scary, not funny, not thrilling, just completely unenjoyable.
---
Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 1:33:52 PM
#157
Karo - The manufacturers of the Chuckie toy, upon hearing all the reports of demonic possession, decide the best way to examine the doll is to completely rebuild it from scratch. What could possibly go wron.. AAUGH!! Pressed for time before before he gets trapped in the body of a toy forever, Chuckie decides the best course of action is not to just immediately take Andy's soul before anyone realizes anything is wrong, but rather pretend to be a normal doll for seemingly no other reason but to troll everyone and waste time. Indeed, the movie is so atrociously written that it can't even bother to remember things that happened 20 minutes ago in the script. 'Hey Andy we heard about how you got detention in school today'. Well you know, the teacher was also beaten to death with a ruler but I guess that wasn't very fucking noteworthy. It is your typical rubbish horror sequel, and as such it must rely almost solely on the charisma of its central killer character. Chuckie may have more presence than, say, Jason Voorhees, but asking him to prop the whole movie up with his squishy rubber arms is a bit too much

KBM - Is it crazy that I think this movie is actually a little better than the first Child's Play? This one leans a lot more into the camp factor of the Chucky doll, which I think was a smart choice (especially with Brad Dourif in the role), and the little kid seems to have learned a little bit about acting since his annoying turn in the first one. I wouldn't go so far as to call this a good movie, but I at least got some entertainment out of the camp and intentional entertainment, at that. I can't say I'm a huge fan of this franchise in general, but for a slasher sequel, this is not bad.

Snake - Why I Chose It - Three Chucky films were released in the 90s, and all three were moderately popular box office successes. I targeted two for this: Bride of Chucky, and this one, the first sequel. I had Bride on the list for a long time due its softly rebooted storyline perfect for new viewers and for being one of the most well-known and successful entries (the most, in fact) in the series. However, I ultimately went with CP2 because it was the first sequel in what would become a long running franchise, and for being the film to establish the new tone the Child's Play series would keep for the rest of the films in the series going on.

My Thoughts - I've never really been a big fan of the Child's Play series. I think Chucky is a mostly nonsensical, non-threatening villain, and it was a great move to go goofy with the character rather than having that pretense of being a serious horror movie. This film really brings Chucky into his own and Brad Dourif is undeniably good here. He's the only one that can really act at all in this film; Alex Vincent is as stiff as ever and none of the adults are very good either. I lied a little, because I do like Christine Elise's character too, but ultimately the spotlight is on Chucky. Besides a decent ending sequence, Child's Play 2 absolutely plods along with little aim or purpose, cycling constantly between home, school, and the basement, with the most unrealistically annoying parents and teachers in existence. If it wasn't for Chucky himself, this movie would be absolutely worthless.

JONA - Aside from the eye-opening climax, theres not much substance here besides Chuckys antics.
---
Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 1:33:08 PM
#156
30. Child's Play 2

Genny - 13
Inviso - 20
Charon - 25
Karo - 25
KBM - 28
Snake - 30
JONA - 31
Scarlet - 32
Johnbobb - 39

Genny - I'm not gonna say it's better than Child's Play, but I would still put Child's Play 2 in the same sentence unlike anything ending in "of Chucky"... Oh wait, shit! Anyway, the sequel takes a campy approach to the lore of Chucky intentionally and it works. When Chucky impersonated the Tommy doll is the first time I burst out laughing at anything in this project. However despite this being a bit more comedic than the original it goes heavier on the slasher horror. I ended up feeling bad for Andy and Kyle's foster parents even though the dad was kind of a dick. 7.8/10

Inviso - Okay sowhy the FUCK would you, a major toy company, decide to repurpose a burned and mangled Good Guy doll that is potentially connected with multiple homicides? I dont care what dumbassed PR scheme you have in mind, but just let it fucking GO. Anyway, this movie winds up extremely goofy, right from the first kill being that of an electrocuted factory worker who gets backflipped through a plate glass window. And its kinda fucked up in just how psychologically damaging the whole thing is bound to be for Andy. No one believes him, hes tormented by a killer doll, and even more people die all around him. Plus, some of the adults that die are just CARTOONISHLY awful (specifically Andys teacher and his foster father).

Ill give credit thoughChuckie is genuinely unsettling. And some of the kills are really creative (including murdering Chuckie like, three times in the Good Guy factory). Oh! And also, I like how they didnt turn Kyle into a completely one-note bitch, but rather she kinda understood the shit Andy was going through, and gave him slack more often than not. Also, I felt really bad for Joanne. It seemed like she either couldnt have kids of her own, or didnt feel like her husband would make for a good father, but she seemed to genuinely care for Andy and Kyle, only snapping once her husband died. I wish she hadnt been killed so callously, but at least is was off-screen, so we didnt have to watch her suffer.


Charon - All the gleeful gore that is Chucky, this time without the elements of suspense or mystery. A lot of these horror franchises exist because their lead, that is their villain, is such a powerful onscreen presence. Chucky's mere appearance in a film, usually, is enough to get people interested and you can at least expect a quality performance that can't really be duplicated by Brad Dourif. This film drops the tense atmosphere of the first one by just showing you Chucky doing evil things immediately. It makes the film much less interesting than the original, but still good enough to be enjoyed for the mindless series of deaths that it is.
---
Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicMost Quotable Media: The Matrix / Hamlet ||| Pulp Fiction / Princess Bride
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 12:13:57 PM
#21
Matrix
Pulp Fiction
---
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Topic^King of the Mountain^ - Save My Shapeshifter - Day 3
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 1:34:53 AM
#102
Clayface
---
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Topic^King of the Mountain^ - Save My Shapeshifter - Day 3
Snake5555555555
06/28/19 12:13:47 AM
#74
Eddie Van Blundh
---
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Topic^King of the Mountain^ - Save My Shapeshifter - Day 3
Snake5555555555
06/27/19 11:13:13 PM
#44
Freddy Krueger
---
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/27/19 11:05:35 PM
#153
Johnbobb posted...
Snake5555555555 posted...
Johnbobb - keeps it from being the gothic epic it so badly wants to be.

Snake - holding it back from being the quintessential vampire flick it wants to be.


This feels like one of us copied off the other and changed it just enough to avoid getting caught


Great minds think alike!
---
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/27/19 11:02:20 PM
#152
Outlier

Inviso - 107
Genny - 91
Charon - 84
KBM - 77
Johnbobb - 55
Karo - 49
Scarlet - 45
Snake - 28
JONA - 27

Despite a huge gap, KBM still doesn't touch the top rankings.
---
Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/27/19 10:46:43 PM
#148
Inviso - This shit was confusing. Like, you have SO many characters in this movie, and the writing doesnt do even REMOTELY a good job of establishing who the central character is, or who we as the audience should care about. Youd THINK its Keanu, but hes halfway written out of the film early on. Winona Ryder? She feels like more of a tagalong to the main plot. Gary Oldman? Again, youd THINK so, but hes also the primary antagonist. As a result, theres no focus in the plot. You jump from Transylvania to London and back again, introducing secondary characters with plot lines that dont make any sense. The trio of dudes who are all TOTALLY cool with sharing some skanky redhead isstrange. Oh! And why the fuck is a vampire able to turn into a werewolf? I spent most of the movie thinking there was a secondary monster running around. Really, the acting chops of Gary Oldman and Anthony Hopkins are the saving grace of this film, because it wasstrange at best.

JONA - The film has a good atmosphere but the movies too long and the humanization of Dracula and the reveal of Mina Harker actually being the reincarnation of Draculas lover makes the romance uninteresting.

Karo - This is an awkward and disjointed attempt at making yet another Dracula film, with silly special effects that look like they were done in photoshop and acting so hamfisted and overdramatic it sounds like a 4kids anime dub. The title itself seems pretentious. Are all the many other adaptations not of Bram Stoker's character? Did they raise him from the dead to produce this movie? You better have read the novel or you will understand little of what the hell is going on in this mess, Dracula randomly getting younger or being a werewolf are things we are just supposed to 'know' or something and are not explained at all. Anyway Dracula moves to England and they have to kill him and shit. They know where Dracula keeps his coffin and so of course they go there in the middle of the night because that is clearly the best time to try and kill a vampire and oh my god hey lets leave the girl alone in the room with the window overlooking Creepy Vampire Abbey you'll be safe here. You literally have Van Helsing with you, how can you be so completely fucking stupid? The world didn't really need another Dracula movie, and it certainly didnt need one as awful as this.

Charon - A confusing, bogged down butchering of a classic story that seems so easy to write that it practically writes itself, yet someone decided that they'd ignore the ghost writer. Unfortunately, the film doesn't realize that you can't cram the entire book into a movie without doing a disservice to the source material. From the start it's hard to follow as we're introduced to a woefully miscast Keanu Reeves and then he kinda takes a backseat to other characters for the rest of the film. Dracula's transformations into the wolf are odd and it's not very apparent that it's even him, or why he has to be a wolf when he does it instead of a vampire. We even get this brief lesbian moment which seems... completely pointless. The supporting cast all just blend in together outside of the main 4 or 5 characters; Hopkins clearly is still in Lecter mode here and you can really get a sense for that. It takes me out of the film a bit because of that. As for Dracula himself, there's never any moment I feel I can see things from his side, which is kinda the whole point of Dracula usually. Oldman does a really good Johnny Depp impersonation though, sure. I was really expecting more out of this film and I was just shocked by how drab, puzzling and underwhelming it was.

Genny - I had such high hopes for Bram Stoker's Dracula coming into this and all I have to say having finished it is this: "WTF was that?" If this is a faithful adaptation of the novel then go ahead and cross reading it off my bucket list. 4.2/10
---
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/27/19 10:46:30 PM
#147
31. Bram Stoker's Dracula

KBM - 4
Scarlet - 18
Johnbobb - 22
Snake - 28
Inviso - 30
JONA - 32
Karo - 32
Charon - 38
Genny - 39

KBM - Full-stop, this is the best vampire movie I've ever seen. Though I COMPLETELY understand this not being for everybody, for me this brings the Dracula legend to life like no other adaptation manages. Francis Ford Coppola brings a surreal, nightmarish quality to the visuals and the flow of the story, and Gary Oldman manages to redefine and bring new life to a role that had already been played iconically twice by Bela Lugosi and Christopher Lee. Anthony Hopkins also brings some great manic energy to the second half of the film as one of the most unhinged Van Helsings ever, and I'm gonna be honest, I didn't think Keanu Reeves and Winona Ryder were as bad as their performances' reputations suggest.

Scarlet - God, this is one of the hardest movies to rank and rate on this list. Much like Gary Oldmans haircut. In fact, maybe everything else I think about this movie - from the great camerawork to the interesting sets to the bizarre script to the performances that range from good to bad and everything in between - is best summed up in that haircut. Maybe the movie is actually just about the haircut. Maybe this entire list is predicated on the notion that this haircut will be the defining point of contention that determines the legacy of Snake as a curator of lists. Maybe Snake was the hair stylist here. Maybe every vampire movie before or since this one is fundamentally built around the planned moment when Gary Oldman would sport this haircut. In all honesty, I think my ranking here is soft. I respect so much of this film, and I would honestly watch it again for sheer entertainment value, but certain vital aspects of the film are unmitigated disasters - notably Keanu Reeves performance. But, then theres this hair. And I just dont know what to do with it.
Rating: 48/100


Johnbobb - goddamn this movie is long. I mean, it's not even that long (just a little over 2 hours) but it draaaaaaaaaaags. The visuals and sound and costumes are all excellent but man does it get boring in between the big moments, especially whenever Keanu Reeves is on screen. The performances are inconsistent, ranging from excellent to fucking HORRIBLE. That, on top of a plot that's just a little too meandering, keeps it from being the gothic epic it so badly wants to be.

Snake - Why I Chose It - Often cited as one of the best vampire films ever made, 1992's Dracula was a box office smash and established the tone for a whole new generation of vampire films & tropes still in common use today.

My Thoughts - A tiring exercise of Hollywood excess, Dracula aspires to be the defining representation of vampires on film, but in its quest to do so, it wrings itself to such extremes that you just feel exhausted once it's all said and done. I won't lie that this is a totally eye-catching picture, with a Gothic aesthetic to die for and character designs stick with you long after it's over. And yes, Gary Oldman is as good as they say. But, a film like this needs to be perfect in all areas, and I don't think it has a very solid script and performances like Reeves are just as bad as they say, while the film overstays its welcome with a plodding pace and overdramatic feel, holding it back from being the quintessential vampire flick it wants to be. A strange, curious mess of a film to be sure.
---
Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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Topic^King of the Mountain^ - Save My Shapeshifter - Day 3
Snake5555555555
06/27/19 10:12:08 PM
#20
Carnage
---
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Topic[BIGE] Round 2 Day 3: Terraria v Stardew Valley, Bastion v Edith Finch
Snake5555555555
06/27/19 7:00:38 PM
#6
Edith
---
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TopicBest of the Trope Season 2: Day 189 - Squishy Wizard
Snake5555555555
06/27/19 6:22:36 PM
#7
Zatanna (DC)
Yuna (FFX)
Alice (Shadow Hearts)
---
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/27/19 6:12:25 PM
#143
Outlier

Inviso - 106
Genny - 83
Charon - 77
KBM - 50
Karo - 48
Johnbobb - 46
Scarlet - 32
JONA - 26
Snake - 25

Not too much to comment on, as everyone stays where they are.
---
Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/27/19 5:59:12 PM
#141
Karo - Hey, it's Michael Myers! He's actually alive! Twenty years have passed! He's still trying to kill his sister! Whoop-de-doo! Once you pass the opening sequence, the film is an incredibly boring slog that is just a good 40 minutes of hey this crazy chick sees Michael Myers! But ha ha wait no she was just mistaken, dun dunn DUNNNNN!!! Then the Happy Mask Butcher finally shows up and stabs a bunch of people we dont care about in a generic manner before being finally killed by Laurie after surviving: 1. being hit with a battle ax. 2. being stabbed 10 times in the chest. 3. being thrown out a second story window. 4. being ejected through the windshield of a car going like 80 miles an hour then run over by the car and knocked off a 50 foot cliff and said car dropped on top of him. C'mon now, Myers isn't supposed to be fucking Superman, he's just a crazy dude who wears a mask. One fatal flaw in the movies premise is echoed by several of the characters in the dialogue: why the hell did Michael wait so long to come after his sister? Who the fuck knows, and you know what, who the fuck cares. It's just another pointless slasher sequel made to profiteer off of characters created decades ago and should be chucked out the window like the garbage it is.
---
Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/27/19 5:58:01 PM
#140
KBM - Credit where credit is due: this is definitely not the worst entry in the Halloween franchise, though it's far from the best one either. It does, however, have the worst title of the bunch (even considering that three of the movies are just called Halloween and two are called Halloween II yeah, this franchise is a mess). Wisely ignoring the events of all but the first two movies in the series (wiping out the mess that was the Jamie Lloyd storyline) so that we can bring back Jamie Lee Curtis, the return of Laurie Strode manages to somewhat salvage what's otherwise a mediocre-at-best script. Probably the worst thing about this movie is its overreliance on cornball fake-out jump scares, which have a numbing effect after awhile. There's some interesting casting here, with quite a few before-they-were-famous appearances, but unfortunately most of the characters really don't get that much interesting to do save for a wink-wink extended cameo appearance by Janet Leigh of Psycho fame. More or less the same concept as this movie would be redone to better results with 2018's Halloween, rendering this subpar effort little more than a historical curiosity for series completionists. The ending sequence is pretty well done, at least.

Scarlet - The signature grungy Halloween flavor has been drained in favor of a more slick, polished and generic late-90s post-Scream horror vibe, though I still find it a lot more watchable than Halloween 5 or 6. Thats not much of a compliment. Heck, that might be more of a dig at 5 and 6. Having Jamie Lee back helps save this movie from utter rating destruction. I guess the biggest compliment I can give is that the final thirty seconds or so are pretty cool.
Rating: 24/100


Snake - Why I Chose It - One of two Halloween sequels released in the 90s, I ultimately went for H20 due to its connection to the original two films instead of the sloppy continuity mess created with the fourth film, as well as the 20th anniversary being an important landmark for one of the biggest horror icons ever. While perhaps seen as "just another" slasher sequel to some, I think for exploring the world of horror, it's important to check in on the big franchises and see what has been done right and what has been their biggest mistakes.

My Thoughts - Halloween H20 is by and large NOT the worst Halloween film ever made. I actually think it's one of the better ones overall, with all credit to Jamie Lee Curtis for not phoning in her performance despite almost quitting the film all together because of constant Halloween sequel bait. This could've been an excellent psychological horror piece between Myers and Strode, but we're not here to discuss could'ves. The fact of the matter is, Laurie's son, LL Cool J, and a forgettable cast of generic high schoolers forgoes any creativity or opportunity for real character development, instead opting for sloppy, boring kills and a rushed ending that closes the book on Myers for good (for just about the 3rd or 4th time, depending on who's counting). After being blown up to smithereens and burning alive in Halloween 2, how am I ever going to believe Michael is really dead this time? The mask in this is also really cheap looking, I hate how Myers looks in this. Though, despite all my criticism, I still think there's at least some aspects of a good movie here, you just have to look pretty closely to see them. It's definitely that Curtis factor that carries the film and makes it a worthwhile entry at the very least for a Halloween fan.
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TopicGauntlet Crew Ranks 90s Horror Films - Do you like ranking scary movies?
Snake5555555555
06/27/19 5:57:40 PM
#139
32. Halloween H20: 20 Years Later

Charon - 19
Genny - 20
Inviso - 27
Johnbobb - 28
JONA - 30
KBM - 31
Scarlet - 31
Snake - 31
Karo - 38

Charon - While not the film the 2018 version would be H20 gave us an early glimpse of what a reunion between the two series leads would be like, and much like that film it'd have some success. I've always enjoyed the dynamic relationship shared by Laurie and Michael; most slashers like Freddy and Jason lack a connection to their victims whereas Myers has a singular driven goal. This movie also introduced a young Josh Harnett whom I thought played his role well. I'm probably a little biased towards Halloween as a whole, but this film was a nice return to form after a couple of real stinkers for the franchise.

Genny - I know Michael Myers is regarded as the best of the big three slashers by some, but he's always been my least favorite of the trio personally. Jason and Freddy have that supernatural flair about them and what sets Michael apart is that he's a normal guy who happens to be evil for no reason. Also that he seems impervious to fire, bullets, stab wounds, and falling from heights. Really I think the mistake was making him "normal" Jaime Lee Curtis gives a solid performance here, but everyone else either phones it in or overacts aside from LL who's acting isn't enjoyable for a different reason. I especially dislike the many irrational decisions made by Laurie and Michael throughout the film, but it has some nice kills. 7.3/10

Inviso - First off, I feel like my enjoyment of this film is either hampered or bolstered by the fact that Ive literally never seen a single film in the Halloween franchise, outside of the reboot we watched for the last horror list. Hampered, because I have no context for the films plot. Bolstered, because I have no idea how much better or worse the film is compared to its predecessors. But I digress. If youre going to make a slasher film and youre going to fill it with contrived nonsense, the least you can do is stack up a high body count. But this film starts with a trio of unnecessary deaths, then a LONG gap, and then three more kills in quick succession. Really, the only thing that makes this feel different from a generic slasher film is the ending. Laurie FUCKS Michael up MULTIPLE times. She stabs him, steals the morgue truck with his dead body in it, slams on the breaks to fling him through the windshield, runs him over, pins him against a tree, and decapitates him. While this ending is awesome, its also completely pointless and feels like a means of bloating a movie that doesnt even reach 90 minutes. Seriously, this is a ten-minute sequence after the standard Michael is presumed dead and escapes to set up the sequel moment of the film, and the fact that it was necessary is not great. There is just SO much filler in this movie just to get it up to a decent runtime, and it winds up not being that great as a result.

Johnbobb - As much as I want to give this movie credit for sticking the landing at the end SO HARD, I can't. One trope I HATE in horror movies is "significant character so unbearably and irrationally awful that you want them to die." Another is excessive fakeout jumpscares. And holy shit does this movie abuse those two to hell and back. The son is such a horrible shit that I can barely sympathize with Laurie for wanting to protect him, and literally like every five minutes there's someone startling somebody else for some stupid reason. There are cool, classic Halloween moments hidden in a bunch of bullshit.

JONA - Most of the movie is dull but the climax can be pretty entertaining.
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TopicMost Quotable Media: Mass Effect / Scott Pilgrim ||| Smash Bros. Dojo / The Room
Snake5555555555
06/27/19 11:36:28 AM
#24
Mass Effect
Room
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Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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Topic^King of the Mountain^ - Save My Shapeshifter - Day 2
Snake5555555555
06/26/19 11:19:24 PM
#92
Entity
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Listen, suffering is a fact of life. Either you learn how to deal with that or you go under.
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