Current Events > My girlfriend tried to kill herself after I told her I couldn't do this anymore.

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pinky0926 03/14/24 2:56:12 PM #1:	On Sunday we had an epic argument, and I told her I was done with this. Immediately she started sobbing and pleading for me not to go. She actually vomited. I didn't move on this, because usually my biggest weakness is that I always put on the hero cape when there's a damsel in distress, but I'd been stressed out for months by this point. On Monday morning she asked if she could pick me up and drive me to work, and I agreed. She really hoped I'd changed my mind, but I hadn't. I said I needed space and I couldn't reassure her that we'd be fine, because we weren't. She started using catastrophic language. I told her I had to go. So I went to the office, she drove off. About an hour later I started to get some concerning messages from her. "I'm going to sleep, I love you". I mean it was 10am. I asked her friends if they could check on her, and they all said the same thing: she'd sent them a concerning message too and hadn't replied to their messages, which is very out of character. I texted her closest friend who said she'd received a message with the password to her laptop and phone. I called the police, gave them all the details, and told my line manager at work (who happens to be a friend of hers, we'll call him Steve) and we immediately went out looking for her. We found her car abandoned at the side of the road maybe 4 miles down from my office, beside some woods (I work in a rural area). We jumped out and started frantically looking for her in the paddock, in the woods nearby, at the stream. I don't know how much time passed, it could have been 5 minutes or 30, but eventually I heard the worst thing I think I've ever heard: Steve screaming "call an ambulance!". I ran to where I heard the voice, scared of what I was about to see. She was lying unconscious under a bush. She was breathing, but very pale, and convulsing. EMTs arrived, police arrived. We went to hospital. She'd taken a cocktail of painkillers and other opioids and beer. She came to in the ambulance and immediately started crying. I told everyone what was happening, and they all started to visit. I know it's not my fault, logically. Everyone keeps telling me that. But I'll never get the image out of my head of that desperate pleading look in her eyes when she told me not to go and I just got out of the car, nor of the image of finding her body, or that horrible scream from Steve. I don't really know where I'm going with this but I think I need to talk to someone professional because my mental health has taken the biggest hit of my life over this. I think the experience has given me a kind of PTSD because all I'm doing lately is breaking down several times a day. And now the situation is even worse. She's in a psych ward, and I still have this thing hanging over my head that I said I wanted to break up and now it feels like I can't do that, because what if she dies? So yeah, welcome to my blog. --- CE's Resident Scotsman. http://i.imgur.com/ILz2ZbV.jpg <cite>pinky0926 posted [p:979367165] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>On Sunday we had an epic argument, and I told her I was done with this. Immediately she started sobbing and pleading for me not to go. She actually vomited. I didn't move on this, because usually my biggest weakness is that I always put on the hero cape when there's a damsel in distress, but I'd been stressed out for months by this point. On Monday morning she asked if she could pick me up and drive me to work, and I agreed. She really hoped I'd changed my mind, but I hadn't. I said I needed space and I couldn't reassure her that we'd be fine, because we weren't. She started using catastrophic language. I told her I had to go. So I went to the office, she drove off. About an hour later I started to get some concerning messages from her. "I'm going to sleep, I love you". I mean it was 10am. I asked her friends if they could check on her, and they all said the same thing: she'd sent them a concerning message too and hadn't replied to their messages, which is very out of character. I texted her closest friend who said she'd received a message with the password to her laptop and phone. I called the police, gave them all the details, and told my line manager at work (who happens to be a friend of hers, we'll call him Steve) and we immediately went out looking for her. We found her car abandoned at the side of the road maybe 4 miles down from my office, beside some woods (I work in a rural area). We jumped out and started frantically looking for her in the paddock, in the woods nearby, at the stream. I don't know how much time passed, it could have been 5 minutes or 30, but eventually I heard the worst thing I think I've ever heard: Steve screaming "call an ambulance!". I ran to where I heard the voice, scared of what I was about to see. She was lying unconscious under a bush. She was breathing, but very pale, and convulsing. EMTs arrived, police arrived. We went to hospital. She'd taken a cocktail of painkillers and other opioids and beer. She came to in the ambulance and immediately started crying. I told everyone what was happening, and they all started to visit. I know it's not my fault, logically. Everyone keeps telling me that. But I'll never get the image out of my head of that desperate pleading look in her eyes when she told me not to go and I just got out of the car, nor of the image of finding her body, or that horrible scream from Steve. I don't really know where I'm going with this but I think I need to talk to someone professional because my mental health has taken the biggest hit of my life over this. I think the experience has given me a kind of PTSD because all I'm doing lately is breaking down several times a day. And now the situation is even worse. She's in a psych ward, and I still have this thing hanging over my head that I said I wanted to break up and now it feels like I can't do that, because what if she dies? So yeah, welcome to my blog. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
MC_BatCommander 03/14/24 2:58:36 PM #2:	That's awful that she put you through that man, but you can't let her force you to stay in a toxic relationship like that. Best of luck to you going forward --- The Legend is True! <cite>MC_BatCommander posted [p:979367205] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>That's awful that she put you through that man, but you can't let her force you to stay in a toxic relationship like that. Best of luck to you going forward </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Bandit_Keith 03/14/24 3:02:15 PM #3:	pinky0926 posted... And now the situation is even worse. She's in a psych ward, and I still have this thing hanging over my head that I said I wanted to break up and now it feels like I can't do that, because what if she dies? Damn, I'm going to be callous as hell, but that's not your problem. It's awful if she kills herself. But that's her decision. People can't threaten to end their lives in order to force you to be with them. That's the fucking worst emotional blackmail I can think of. She needs to remain in the psych ward and get serious help. You need to be able to move on with your life. --- http://i.imgur.com/nq0Fn6a.jpg <cite>Bandit_Keith posted [p:979367258] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>pinky0926 posted... </cite><quote>And now the situation is even worse. She's in a psych ward, and I still have this thing hanging over my head that I said I wanted to break up and now it feels like I can't do that, because what if she dies?</quote>Damn, I'm going to be callous as hell, but that's not your problem. It's awful if she kills herself. But that's her decision. People can't threaten to end their lives in order to force you to be with them. That's the fucking worst emotional blackmail I can think of. She needs to remain in the psych ward and get serious help. You need to be able to move on with your life. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Jupiter 03/14/24 3:02:54 PM #4:	That is truly awful! My condolences, man. But yea, I think you need to see a professional. That's some heavy stuff. Almost impossible not to feel some guilt over it despite knowing it is absolutely not your fault. I went through something similar when I was 18 or 19. I had a suicidal ex that tried to kill herself over a small argument. She swallowed a bunch of pills. I could tell something was off when I called her because she sounded very out of it. I rushed over to her house and found her in a bad way. Didn't know what to do. Tried to make her vomit, but that didn't work. Then I called her father and he called the hospital. She had to get her stomach pumped. It wasn't as traumatizing for me since she looked mostly normal just out of it. I can't imagine how it must have felt for you to find her in the way that you did. That's an entirely different level. --- Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/kid_prodigy23 <cite>Jupiter posted [p:979367272] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>That is truly awful! My condolences, man. But yea, I think you need to see a professional. That's some heavy stuff. Almost impossible not to feel some guilt over it despite knowing it is absolutely not your fault. I went through something similar when I was 18 or 19. I had a suicidal ex that tried to kill herself over a small argument. She swallowed a bunch of pills. I could tell something was off when I called her because she sounded very out of it. I rushed over to her house and found her in a bad way. Didn't know what to do. Tried to make her vomit, but that didn't work. Then I called her father and he called the hospital. She had to get her stomach pumped.It wasn't as traumatizing for me since she looked mostly normal just out of it. I can't imagine how it must have felt for you to find her in the way that you did. That's an entirely different level. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Japanties 03/14/24 3:03:07 PM #5:	Bandit_Keith posted... Damn, I'm going to be callous as hell, but that's not your problem. It's awful if she kills herself. But that's her decision. People can't threaten to end their lives in order to force you to be with them. That's the fucking worst emotional blackmail I can think of. She needs to remain in the psych ward and get serious help. You need to be able to move on with your life. I second this. <cite>Japanties posted [p:979367274] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Bandit_Keith posted... </cite><quote>Damn, I'm going to be callous as hell, but that's not your problem. It's awful if she kills herself. But that's her decision. People can't threaten to end their lives in order to force you to be with them. That's the fucking worst emotional blackmail I can think of. She needs to remain in the psych ward and get serious help. You need to be able to move on with your life.</quote>I second this.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LonelyStoner 03/14/24 3:03:43 PM #6:	Holy shit. Thats awful, man. What I would say to you is that you cant blame yourself for what other people do in such a serious situation. It was likely a lot of factors that you didnt largely contribute to. Its never one thing that triggers a person to take such actions. Ive had friends and lovers who were admitted to psych wards and rehabs for suicidal attempts. I promise this wasnt your fault. You did what was in your best interest (and you have to look out for yourself, because youre not going to be able to do anything for anyone without that) and had no way of knowing what would happen afterwards. --- He's all alone through the day and night. <cite>LonelyStoner posted [p:979367281] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Holy shit. Thats awful, man. What I would say to you is that you cant blame yourself for what other people do in such a serious situation. It was likely a lot of factors that you didnt largely contribute to. Its never one thing that triggers a person to take such actions. Ive had friends and lovers who were admitted to psych wards and rehabs for suicidal attempts. I promise this wasnt your fault. You did what was in your best interest (and you have to look out for yourself, because youre not going to be able to do anything for anyone without that) and had no way of knowing what would happen afterwards. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
BlueAnnihilator 03/14/24 3:03:56 PM #7:	What other people choose to do with themselves isn't your problem. At this point, I'd say you've done your due diligence. Leave her be and get the help you need. --- I agree with you, Blue. - FinalRockerdude, Vgmasta, ZeldaFan42, ObservanTeMK, Magoo111, E121Phi, re4master543, PJiddy, bloodmage3 (cont. in quote) <cite>BlueAnnihilator posted [p:979367289] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>What other people choose to do with themselves isn't your problem. At this point, I'd say you've done your due diligence. Leave her be and get the help you need. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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bsp77 03/14/24 3:04:27 PM #9:	Wow, that is horrible. Not your fault and you shouldn't feel guilty, but I understand why you do anyway. I haven't been there, but I can imagine. How long had you been together? --- Currently playing: Sea of Stars <cite>bsp77 posted [p:979367297] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Wow, that is horrible. Not your fault and you shouldn't feel guilty, but I understand why you do anyway. I haven't been there, but I can imagine.How long had you been together? </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
falayyou01 03/14/24 3:04:44 PM #10:	Enough playing white knight. You deserve peace. Keep her in a psych ward under suicide watch with full surveillance and go on your way. --- Pordalance <cite>falayyou01 posted [p:979367304] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Enough playing white knight. You deserve peace. Keep her in a psych ward under suicide watch with full surveillance and go on your way. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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Umbreon 03/14/24 3:22:36 PM #13:	That's a terrible experience to go through, I'm sorry you went through that. Like everyone else said, this isn't your fault. You may want to talk to a professional about this. --- Black Lives Matter. ~DYL~ (On mobile) <cite>Umbreon posted [p:979367586] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>That's a terrible experience to go through, I'm sorry you went through that. Like everyone else said, this isn't your fault. You may want to talk to a professional about this. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
boxoto 03/14/24 3:28:30 PM #14:	yea, this is really fucked, but like you and others have said, it's not your fault, but I also understand that it's something that's difficult for you to accept right now. just look for the help and self-care you feel you might need, and hopefully she gets the care she needs, too. --- Don't you agree, Zach? https://streamable.com/enq4r7 <cite>boxoto posted [p:979367664] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>yea, this is really fucked, but like you and others have said, it's not your fault, but I also understand that it's something that's difficult for you to accept right now. just look for the help and self-care you feel you might need, and hopefully she gets the care she needs, too. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Guide 03/14/24 3:34:15 PM #15:	This is the kind of thing where you have to put yourself first. What she does to herself is no longer your responsibility. --- evening main 2.4356848e+91 https://youtu.be/Acn5IptKWQU <cite>Guide posted [p:979367751] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>This is the kind of thing where you have to put yourself first. What she does to herself is no longer your responsibility. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DarthDemented 03/14/24 3:36:06 PM #16:	I'd say let her get her care in the psych ward, and see where she is. She is getting counseling in there. At the very least let her get her apologies out then from there it's up to you to forgive and move on with or without her. This whole thing was an unfair thing to put on you and everything you're feeling is valid. Get your own counseling as well. When I found my wife dead I badly needed it. The image still sticks with me but I can cope better now. Still bothers me sure, but it's not as severe as it was. --- Paula Wood. My love, my life. 1980-2021 https://store.steampowered.com/wishlist/profiles/76561198210788964/#sort=order <cite>DarthDemented posted [p:979367783] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>I'd say let her get her care in the psych ward, and see where she is. She is getting counseling in there. At the very least let her get her apologies out then from there it's up to you to forgive and move on with or without her. This whole thing was an unfair thing to put on you and everything you're feeling is valid. Get your own counseling as well. When I found my wife dead I badly needed it. The image still sticks with me but I can cope better now. Still bothers me sure, but it's not as severe as it was. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
NoxObscuras 03/14/24 3:37:34 PM #17:	Yeah that's terrible, but that seriously isn't your fault. Best thing you can do is focus on your own mental health. Hopefully being in a psych ward for a while will help her, but focus on you. You made your choice to end it, don't let her mental health troubles force you to stay in a relationship that's affecting your mental health --- Steam/Xbox/PSN = NoxObscuras Z490 \| i9-10900K \| EVGA 3080 FTW3 Ultra \| 32GB DDR4 3600 \| 4TB SSD <cite>NoxObscuras posted [p:979367801] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Yeah that's terrible, but that seriously isn't your fault. Best thing you can do is focus on your own mental health. Hopefully being in a psych ward for a while will help her, but focus on you. You made your choice to end it, don't let her mental health troubles force you to stay in a relationship that's affecting your mental health </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
King_Rial 03/14/24 3:43:19 PM #18:	Being a empathic human, you're gonna feel this way. We are all just going to keep saying "It's not your fault" and that's true. But you're still gonna feel the way you feel. Don't just think about getting help, get that help. I'm headed to a session right now. Gonna just sit in the car for privacy and do a virtual visit today. Please, talk to a therapist as soon as you can. --- I use Google... A lot.... >______> <cite>King_Rial posted [p:979367890] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Being a empathic human, you're gonna feel this way. We are all just going to keep saying "It's not your fault" and that's true. But you're still gonna feel the way you feel. Don't just think about getting help, get that help. I'm headed to a session right now. Gonna just sit in the car for privacy and do a virtual visit today.Please, talk to a therapist as soon as you can. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
pnut027 03/14/24 3:46:19 PM #19:	Its not your fault. Just leave. Dont let her manipulate you into staying. If she kills herself, its not blood on your hands. You did what you had to do and now you can walk away. --- If you're not getting promoted, it's not because you're not good at your job. It's because you're good at ONLY your job. <cite>pnut027 posted [p:979367942] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Its not your fault. Just leave. Dont let her manipulate you into staying. If she kills herself, its not blood on your hands. You did what you had to do and now you can walk away. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Dungeater 03/14/24 3:47:56 PM #20:	You have to break up or she will drive you to that point too. You will contemplate suicide, or worse. Get a therapist for the CPTSD you almost certainly have. And break up. I am speaking from experience. --- My fate was the grandest, most brilliant of them all. He/Him <cite>Dungeater posted [p:979367972] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>You have to break up or she will drive you to that point too. You will contemplate suicide, or worse. Get a therapist for the CPTSD you almost certainly have. And break up.I am speaking from experience. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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teep_ 03/14/24 3:58:21 PM #22:	I'm so sorry. That sounds like a horrible situation to be in The advice given itt is good advice imo, and you should definitely follow it! --- [teep is] an evil genius who will one day kill us all - Choco teep is a God damn genius - Zodd <cite>teep_ posted [p:979368132] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>I'm so sorry. That sounds like a horrible situation to be in The advice given itt is good advice imo, and you should definitely follow it! </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
kingdrake2 03/14/24 4:00:16 PM #23:	pinky0926 posted... She'd taken a cocktail of painkillers and other opioids and beer. shit :(. also to note... that whole experience would cause most people to have bad mental breakdown over experiencing something like that. very traumatic experience FTL. --- currently playing: need for speed hot pursuit remastered (ps4) beware of nemasu: he will push you off platform (fall guys). <cite>kingdrake2 posted [p:979368153] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>pinky0926 posted...</cite><quote>She'd taken a cocktail of painkillers and other opioids and beer.</quote>shit :(. also to note... that whole experience would cause most people to have bad mental breakdown over experiencing something like that.very traumatic experience FTL. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
[deleted] 03/14/24 4:01:47 PM #41:	[deleted] <cite>[deleted] posted [p:979370583] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>[deleted]</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Punished_Blinx 03/14/24 4:04:54 PM #24:	I know it's hard to not feel guilty over what happened. But you did save her life by helping start the search to find her in those woods. She is now where she needs to be and it's probably better for you to keep a distance now and focus on healing yourself. --- A Fallen Mascot <cite>Punished_Blinx posted [p:979368239] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>I know it's hard to not feel guilty over what happened. But you did save her life by helping start the search to find her in those woods. She is now where she needs to be and it's probably better for you to keep a distance now and focus on healing yourself. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
NoxObscuras 03/14/24 4:08:32 PM #25:	Punished_Blinx posted... I know it's hard to not feel guilty over what happened. But you did save her life by helping start the search to find her in those woods. She is now where she needs to be and it's probably better for you to keep a distance now and focus on healing yourself. This is also true. It sounded like you were pretty proactive about the whole thing TC. I don't know if that helps to think of it that easy. Rather than blame yourself for her attempted suicide, find comfort in knowing that you saved her. And yeah, absolutely go talk to a therapist. Didn't just think about going, actually go. It helps a lot --- Steam/Xbox/PSN = NoxObscuras Z490 \| i9-10900K \| EVGA 3080 FTW3 Ultra \| 32GB DDR4 3600 \| 4TB SSD <cite>NoxObscuras posted [p:979368288] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Punished_Blinx posted... </cite><quote>I know it's hard to not feel guilty over what happened. But you did save her life by helping start the search to find her in those woods. She is now where she needs to be and it's probably better for you to keep a distance now and focus on healing yourself.</quote>This is also true. It sounded like you were pretty proactive about the whole thing TC. I don't know if that helps to think of it that easy. Rather than blame yourself for her attempted suicide, find comfort in knowing that you saved her. And yeah, absolutely go talk to a therapist. Didn't just think about going, actually go. It helps a lot </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
radical_rhino 03/14/24 4:09:10 PM #26:	Id strongly recommend you not visit her in the hospital, talk to her, try to comfort her, etc. Shes not your problem anymore; she has family and friends that can help her. --- .____ [____]===0 . . . . Ye olde beating stick. <cite>radical_rhino posted [p:979368299] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Id strongly recommend you not visit her in the hospital, talk to her, try to comfort her, etc. Shes not your problem anymore; she has family and friends that can help her. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
tremain07 03/14/24 4:14:06 PM #27:	Dude, just make a clean break, this may sound cruel but she's not your problem whatever happens to her after you is not on you tell anyone who tries to guilt you on this to fuck off --- A worthless existence <cite>tremain07 posted [p:979368379] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Dude, just make a clean break, this may sound cruel but she's not your problem whatever happens to her after you is not on you tell anyone who tries to guilt you on this to fuck off </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
ThePieReborn 03/14/24 4:14:46 PM #28:	Speaking as someone who was in her position a few years ago, albeit in the friendship context, I echo what everyone else has said in this topic. Her choices are not your fault, just like my choices were not my friend's fault regardless of how much her words and actions hurt me and seemed illogical. It's taken a long time for me to recognize that reality, and I have honestly only recently fully acknowledged and taken responsibility for those choices. I hope that she is able to come back from this. I was fortunate in finding an amazing friend and mentor who walked with me and encouraged me to improve without being judgemental towards me or my former friend. Please take care of yourself, TC. If you need to, reach out to your support group or a professional. More than anything, however, do not blame yourself. --- Party leader, passive-aggressive doormat, pasta eater extraordinaire! <cite>ThePieReborn posted [p:979368391] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Speaking as someone who was in her position a few years ago, albeit in the friendship context, I echo what everyone else has said in this topic.Her choices are not your fault, just like my choices were not my friend's fault regardless of how much her words and actions hurt me and seemed illogical. It's taken a long time for me to recognize that reality, and I have honestly only recently fully acknowledged and taken responsibility for those choices.I hope that she is able to come back from this. I was fortunate in finding an amazing friend and mentor who walked with me and encouraged me to improve without being judgemental towards me or my former friend.Please take care of yourself, TC. If you need to, reach out to your support group or a professional. More than anything, however, do not blame yourself. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
_Raich_ 03/14/24 4:23:59 PM #29:	You did the right thing. Just general advice to all, if anyone ever threatens to kill themselves because you won't be with them anymore, call the cops immediately, whether you think it's legit or them being manipulative. You'll be glad you did if it's legit, and it's one hell of a reality check/lesson learned if they were faking it. --- http://i649.photobucket.com/albums/uu215/chitlins_and_grits/_Raich_.jpg <cite>_Raich_ posted [p:979368529] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>You did the right thing. Just general advice to all, if anyone ever threatens to kill themselves because you won't be with them anymore, call the cops immediately, whether you think it's legit or them being manipulative. You'll be glad you did if it's legit, and it's one hell of a reality check/lesson learned if they were faking it. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Kaiganeer 03/14/24 4:24:58 PM #30:	moving on seems impossible because it's still fresh, but the whole thing'll get easier to look at as time passes. she tried guilt-tripping you by attempting to off herself and regardless of the circumstances that lead to that happening, anyone willing to do that is not a person worth knowing <cite>Kaiganeer posted [p:979368547] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>moving on seems impossible because it's still fresh, but the whole thing'll get easier to look at as time passes. she tried guilt-tripping you by attempting to off herself and regardless of the circumstances that lead to that happening, anyone willing to do that is not a person worth knowing</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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DrizztLink 03/14/24 4:32:48 PM #32:	You made the right call and you're the reason she's alive. This isn't on you. *ABSOLUTELY* find a counseling service, keywords on trauma and grief. You might consider EMDR if you find a practitioner, it works very well for mitigating that physical anxiety response you get when you think about it. --- He/Him http://guidesmedia.ign.com/guides/9846/images/slowpoke.gif https://i.imgur.com/M8h2ATe.png https://i.imgur.com/6ezFwG1.png <cite>DrizztLink posted [p:979368690] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>You made the right call and you're the reason she's alive.This isn't on you.ABSOLUTELY find a counseling service, keywords on trauma and grief.You might consider EMDR if you find a practitioner, it works very well for mitigating that physical anxiety response you get when you think about it. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Xenogears15 03/14/24 4:35:14 PM #33:	I don't know what else to say other than I'm glad you decided to get out of that toxic relationship. And that's what her suicide attempt should have proven to you: she was incredibly bad and toxic for you. No harm in getting some therapy to get over this. I just wish you the best of luck in the future. --- This rant was brought to you by your local random thinker. I'm as Canadian as Wayne Gretzky crashing a snowmobile into a moose. - JIC X <cite>Xenogears15 posted [p:979368717] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>I don't know what else to say other than I'm glad you decided to get out of that toxic relationship. And that's what her suicide attempt should have proven to you: she was incredibly bad and toxic for you.No harm in getting some therapy to get over this. I just wish you the best of luck in the future. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
garan 03/14/24 4:39:18 PM #34:	Bandit_Keith posted... Damn, I'm going to be callous as hell, but that's not your problem. It's awful if she kills herself. But that's her decision. People can't threaten to end their lives in order to force you to be with them. That's the fucking worst emotional blackmail I can think of. She needs to remain in the psych ward and get serious help. You need to be able to move on with your life. Seriously, this. I'm very sorry you're going through this, but her choices are not your fault. You need to get some distance, and she needs serious professional help. Take it easy and don't drown yourself in guilt. Good luck. <cite>garan posted [p:979368780] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Bandit_Keith posted...</cite><quote>Damn, I'm going to be callous as hell, but that's not your problem. It's awful if she kills herself. But that's her decision. People can't threaten to end their lives in order to force you to be with them. That's the fucking worst emotional blackmail I can think of. She needs to remain in the psych ward and get serious help. You need to be able to move on with your life.</quote>Seriously, this. I'm very sorry you're going through this, but her choices are not your fault. You need to get some distance, and she needs serious professional help. Take it easy and don't drown yourself in guilt. Good luck.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
pinky0926 03/14/24 5:13:07 PM #35:	Thank you for all the kind messages. It's been a lot, and I'm such a goddamn mess right now. Next step is to get a counseller/therapist to talk through this stuff. --- CE's Resident Scotsman. http://i.imgur.com/ILz2ZbV.jpg <cite>pinky0926 posted [p:979369285] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Thank you for all the kind messages. It's been a lot, and I'm such a goddamn mess right now. Next step is to get a counseller/therapist to talk through this stuff. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Alteres 03/14/24 5:39:29 PM #36:	You saved her life man. Good job. --- ........the ghost in the machine... IGN: Fox, FC: 5344-2646-0982 <cite>Alteres posted [p:979369775] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>You saved her life man.Good job. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
BalanceLost 03/14/24 5:47:39 PM #37:	My ex broke up with me and then tried to commit suicide in our apartment. Not exactly the same scenario but I initially felt guilt, despite it being all him, but I surrounded myself with great sensible friends who helped me sort things out mentally. I hope you can do the same --- "BalanceLost has a steam-powered PS2 because Sweden don't have electric" - dimeanatrix <cite>BalanceLost posted [p:979369947] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>My ex broke up with me and then tried to commit suicide in our apartment. Not exactly the same scenario but I initially felt guilt, despite it being all him, but I surrounded myself with great sensible friends who helped me sort things out mentally. I hope you can do the same </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Rain_Dust 03/14/24 5:50:10 PM #38:	Hope she gets better. You should drop her like a sack of potatoes. Crazy now. Way crazier later. --- We used to have empires ruled by emperors. There used to be kingdoms lead by kings. Now all we got are countries. <cite>Rain_Dust posted [p:979369984] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Hope she gets better. You should drop her like a sack of potatoes. Crazy now. Way crazier later. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Zonbei 03/14/24 5:50:26 PM #39:	pinky0926 posted... On Sunday we had an epic argument, and I told her I was done with this. Immediately she started sobbing and pleading for me not to go. She actually vomited. I didn't move on this, because usually my biggest weakness is that I always put on the hero cape when there's a damsel in distress, but I'd been stressed out for months by this point. On Monday morning she asked if she could pick me up and drive me to work, and I agreed. She really hoped I'd changed my mind, but I hadn't. I said I needed space and I couldn't reassure her that we'd be fine, because we weren't. She started using catastrophic language. I told her I had to go. So I went to the office, she drove off. About an hour later I started to get some concerning messages from her. "I'm going to sleep, I love you". I mean it was 10am. I asked her friends if they could check on her, and they all said the same thing: she'd sent them a concerning message too and hadn't replied to their messages, which is very out of character. I texted her closest friend who said she'd received a message with the password to her laptop and phone. I called the police, gave them all the details, and told my line manager at work (who happens to be a friend of hers, we'll call him Steve) and we immediately went out looking for her. We found her car abandoned at the side of the road maybe 4 miles down from my office, beside some woods (I work in a rural area). We jumped out and started frantically looking for her in the paddock, in the woods nearby, at the stream. I don't know how much time passed, it could have been 5 minutes or 30, but eventually I heard the worst thing I think I've ever heard: Steve screaming "call an ambulance!". I ran to where I heard the voice, scared of what I was about to see. She was lying unconscious under a bush. She was breathing, but very pale, and convulsing. EMTs arrived, police arrived. We went to hospital. She'd taken a cocktail of painkillers and other opioids and beer. She came to in the ambulance and immediately started crying. I told everyone what was happening, and they all started to visit. I know it's not my fault, logically. Everyone keeps telling me that. But I'll never get the image out of my head of that desperate pleading look in her eyes when she told me not to go and I just got out of the car, nor of the image of finding her body, or that horrible scream from Steve. I don't really know where I'm going with this but I think I need to talk to someone professional because my mental health has taken the biggest hit of my life over this. I think the experience has given me a kind of PTSD because all I'm doing lately is breaking down several times a day. And now the situation is even worse. She's in a psych ward, and I still have this thing hanging over my head that I said I wanted to break up and now it feels like I can't do that, because what if she dies? So yeah, welcome to my blog. I would try to frame it this way; you are already broken up. You dont need to do it again, you already did. She did what she chose to do as a result of that, but its done now. Now she can try to heal. Definitely recommend seeing a therapist though. --- It's a luscious mix of words and tricks, that let us bet, when we know we should have folded. <cite>Zonbei posted [p:979369992] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>pinky0926 posted... </cite><quote>On Sunday we had an epic argument, and I told her I was done with this. Immediately she started sobbing and pleading for me not to go. She actually vomited. I didn't move on this, because usually my biggest weakness is that I always put on the hero cape when there's a damsel in distress, but I'd been stressed out for months by this point. On Monday morning she asked if she could pick me up and drive me to work, and I agreed. She really hoped I'd changed my mind, but I hadn't. I said I needed space and I couldn't reassure her that we'd be fine, because we weren't. She started using catastrophic language. I told her I had to go. So I went to the office, she drove off. About an hour later I started to get some concerning messages from her. "I'm going to sleep, I love you". I mean it was 10am. I asked her friends if they could check on her, and they all said the same thing: she'd sent them a concerning message too and hadn't replied to their messages, which is very out of character. I texted her closest friend who said she'd received a message with the password to her laptop and phone. I called the police, gave them all the details, and told my line manager at work (who happens to be a friend of hers, we'll call him Steve) and we immediately went out looking for her. We found her car abandoned at the side of the road maybe 4 miles down from my office, beside some woods (I work in a rural area). We jumped out and started frantically looking for her in the paddock, in the woods nearby, at the stream. I don't know how much time passed, it could have been 5 minutes or 30, but eventually I heard the worst thing I think I've ever heard: Steve screaming "call an ambulance!". I ran to where I heard the voice, scared of what I was about to see. She was lying unconscious under a bush. She was breathing, but very pale, and convulsing. EMTs arrived, police arrived. We went to hospital. She'd taken a cocktail of painkillers and other opioids and beer. She came to in the ambulance and immediately started crying. I told everyone what was happening, and they all started to visit. I know it's not my fault, logically. Everyone keeps telling me that. But I'll never get the image out of my head of that desperate pleading look in her eyes when she told me not to go and I just got out of the car, nor of the image of finding her body, or that horrible scream from Steve. I don't really know where I'm going with this but I think I need to talk to someone professional because my mental health has taken the biggest hit of my life over this. I think the experience has given me a kind of PTSD because all I'm doing lately is breaking down several times a day. And now the situation is even worse. She's in a psych ward, and I still have this thing hanging over my head that I said I wanted to break up and now it feels like I can't do that, because what if she dies? So yeah, welcome to my blog.</quote>I would try to frame it this way; you are already broken up. You dont need to do it again, you already did. She did what she chose to do as a result of that, but its done now. Now she can try to heal. Definitely recommend seeing a therapist though. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
C-zom 03/14/24 6:08:57 PM #40:	Alteres posted... You saved her life man. Good job. --- Since only from below can one better see the heights. http://i.imgur.com/OhZgm.jpg <cite>C-zom posted [p:979370272] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Alteres posted... </cite><quote>You saved her life man.Good job.</quote> </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
hereforemnant 03/14/24 6:33:48 PM #42:	Bandit_Keith posted... Damn, I'm going to be callous as hell, but that's not your problem. It's awful if she kills herself. But that's her decision. People can't threaten to end their lives in order to force you to be with them. That's the fucking worst emotional blackmail I can think of. She needs to remain in the psych ward and get serious help. You need to be able to move on with your life. This was my experience as well. When I was in high school, my first girlfriend & me were still experimenting because we were young of course. But she cut herself a lot & had bad self esteem issues, eventually she would start showing that side where she might do something more to herself, & I can only stop that so much. You just have to get her the help she needs in the system then go your own way, that emotional stress will weigh on you & bring yourself down otherwise. <cite>hereforemnant posted [p:979370714] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Bandit_Keith posted... </cite><quote>Damn, I'm going to be callous as hell, but that's not your problem. It's awful if she kills herself. But that's her decision. People can't threaten to end their lives in order to force you to be with them. That's the fucking worst emotional blackmail I can think of. She needs to remain in the psych ward and get serious help. You need to be able to move on with your life.</quote>This was my experience as well. When I was in high school, my first girlfriend & me were still experimenting because we were young of course. But she cut herself a lot & had bad self esteem issues, eventually she would start showing that side where she might do something more to herself, & I can only stop that so much. You just have to get her the help she needs in the system then go your own way, that emotional stress will weigh on you & bring yourself down otherwise.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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ai123 03/14/24 6:57:40 PM #44:	pinky0926 posted... . . . All of your feelings are natural and understandable. That's how a good person would feel in those circumstances, and there isn't a switch to turn them off (if there were, you would be a sociopath). Your girlfriend is somewhere that she can hopefully get the treatment she needs. You need help too, formal or informal, to get through something like this. You shouldn't blame yourself for what happened. And you shouldn't feel bad for feeling bad either. I wish you all the best. --- 'Vinyl is the poor man's art collection'. <cite>ai123 posted [p:979371049] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>pinky0926 posted... </cite><quote>. . .</quote>All of your feelings are natural and understandable. That's how a good person would feel in those circumstances, and there isn't a switch to turn them off (if there were, you would be a sociopath).Your girlfriend is somewhere that she can hopefully get the treatment she needs.You need help too, formal or informal, to get through something like this. You shouldn't blame yourself for what happened. And you shouldn't feel bad for feeling bad either.I wish you all the best. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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C_Pain 03/14/24 7:25:04 PM #46:	Geez man, that's truly fucked up. I feel like just experiencing/witnessing that necessitates you talk to someone. But as others have said, you should for your own sake distance yourself from her. Threatening/doing self-harm to influence a partner's behavior is a form of manipulation at the end of the day, even if she is genuinely struggling. I know it seems harsh, but it seems like no contact may be needed. --- How quaint. <cite>C_Pain posted [p:979371478] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>Geez man, that's truly fucked up. I feel like just experiencing/witnessing that necessitates you talk to someone. But as others have said, you should for your own sake distance yourself from her. Threatening/doing self-harm to influence a partner's behavior is a form of manipulation at the end of the day, even if she is genuinely struggling. I know it seems harsh, but it seems like no contact may be needed. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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MarcyWarcy 03/14/24 7:40:15 PM #49:	a lot of people have said it already but yeah. you cannot let the guilt and wondering drag you down. you're going to feel it regardless because from what i can tell you seem to be a good person and its natural, but this is not your fault. this is a really bad spot to be at in a relationship, man. you have to really think about your mental health before all else here before deciding if you want to stick around. --- Looks like this gamer's paradise has turned into a gamer's hell............................................... <cite>MarcyWarcy posted [p:979371724] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>a lot of people have said it already but yeah. you cannot let the guilt and wondering drag you down. you're going to feel it regardless because from what i can tell you seem to be a good person and its natural, but this is not your fault.this is a really bad spot to be at in a relationship, man. you have to really think about your mental health before all else here before deciding if you want to stick around. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
RetuenOfDevsman 03/14/24 8:35:46 PM #50:	1. You're not responsible for her decisions. 2. She's nuckin futs and you better get out ASAP. <cite>RetuenOfDevsman posted [p:979372623] in My girlfri... [t:80721473]...</cite> <quote>1. You're not responsible for her decisions.2. She's nuckin futs and you better get out ASAP.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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Current Events > My girlfriend tried to kill herself after I told her I couldn't do this anymore. (+) Yeah! (+)

Current Events > My girlfriend tried to kill herself after I told her I couldn't do this anymore.