Current Events > You can earn $100 billion but you must commit a randomly selected crime

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red_is_ash
11/08/23 10:26:08 PM
#1:


The twist is that the crime you must commit will be entirely random. It could be something where you must jaywalk across a street or just litter to something much much worse. Will you do it? If you refuse to follow through with the crime, you instantly die. You do not get punished for the crime

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Irony
11/08/23 10:27:05 PM
#2:


Will I get punished for the crime

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Carljank
11/08/23 10:27:06 PM
#3:


Tempting but I don't want to have to hurt someone in any way shape or form.

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MICHALECOLE
11/08/23 10:27:07 PM
#4:


Do I get the punishment for doing the crime?
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Unsuprised_Pika
11/08/23 10:27:31 PM
#5:


We need a random crime generator that pulls a random crime from the entire US criminal code so we can know what happens

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Carljank
11/08/23 10:28:23 PM
#6:


Unsuprised_Pika posted...
We need a random crime generator that pulls a random crime from the entire US criminal code so we can know what happens
https://perchance.org/j82meg5oiq

I got "Mailing Threatening Communications"

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red_is_ash
11/08/23 10:29:14 PM
#7:


Irony posted...
Will I get punished for the crime
no

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Rika_Furude
11/08/23 10:31:36 PM
#8:


Carljank posted...
https://perchance.org/j82meg5oiq

I got "Mailing Threatening Communications"
I got use of weapons of mass destruction

not sure if any amount of money is worth that

can I nuke space? Preferably above the Starlink satellite layer
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Carljank
11/08/23 10:32:12 PM
#9:


Rika_Furude posted...
I got use of weapons of mass destruction

not sure if any amount of money will save me from whatever is coming -_-
LOL you are done for

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PoopPotato
11/08/23 10:32:13 PM
#10:


I got motor vehicle theft.... And 100 billion dollars. Nice. I'll buy my victim a Lambo

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Irony
11/08/23 10:33:05 PM
#11:


red_is_ash posted...
no
Sign me up buddy

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Unsuprised_Pika
11/08/23 10:33:16 PM
#12:


"Subornation of Perjury"

So I did what Trump has done/tried to do in every trial related to him. Trying to get others to perjure.

Not too bad. Pretty easy to live with.

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Unsuprised_Pika
11/08/23 10:33:58 PM
#13:


Rika_Furude posted...
I got use of weapons of mass destruction

not sure if any amount of money is worth that

can I nuke space? Preferably above the Starlink satellite layer

Damn hope you don't live in the USA cuz we are gonna get nuked because of you if so.

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Ratchetrockon
11/08/23 10:33:59 PM
#14:


https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/forum/5/5757e18d.jpg

Fuck idk how to do that?????

Edit: ohhh I already know how to do that. I'll use my brother's passport to buy alcohol. Ez pz.

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MarthGoomba
11/08/23 10:34:02 PM
#15:


Carljank posted...
https://perchance.org/j82meg5oiq

Prostitution

>_>

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unclekoolaid73
11/08/23 10:34:10 PM
#16:


Transportation of Stolen Vehicles

I've done worse.

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Irony
11/08/23 10:34:11 PM
#17:


Copyright Matters

I get paid to be a hero

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Xatrion
11/08/23 10:34:23 PM
#18:


Torture. Just straight up torture. Can I torture people by going into a public place and singing loudly and horribly?

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kirbymuncher
11/08/23 10:35:16 PM
#19:


said yes, rolled the site and got trespassing

I think I got off about as easy as possible, I can do that in like 2 minutes and it will inconvenience essentially no one

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Irony
11/08/23 10:35:18 PM
#20:


Xatrion posted...
Torture. Just straight up torture. Can I torture people by going into a public place and singing loudly and horribly?
No you have to shock their testicles

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Bugmeat
11/08/23 10:35:26 PM
#21:


Carljank posted...
https://perchance.org/j82meg5oiq

I got "Mailing Threatening Communications"

Assaulting or Killing Federal Officer is what it gave me. Not bad really. Easy to pull off and assault is such a wide scope that it can be done without having to actually hurt anyone.


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Anony1125
11/08/23 10:36:24 PM
#22:


Yes.

Possession of False Papers to Defraud the U.S.

Uhhh, I think I can handle this on my conscience.

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bnui_ransder
11/08/23 10:36:47 PM
#23:


red_is_ash posted...
You do not get punished for the crime
Fuck it, I'll do it

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Unsuprised_Pika
11/08/23 10:36:50 PM
#24:


Xatrion posted...
Torture. Just straight up torture. Can I torture people by going into a public place and singing loudly and horribly?

If you did it to a known pedophile the jury/judge would go easy on you or refuse to find you guilty probably <_<

Edit: Oh right no punishment.

Alternately play baby shark loudly 24/7 at your neighbor.


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ForsakenHermit
11/08/23 10:38:49 PM
#25:


I got coercion

Would say no regardless.

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MICHALECOLE
11/08/23 10:39:05 PM
#26:


https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/forum/7/7ce47086.jpg
shit Ive done that already
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unclekoolaid73
11/08/23 10:40:27 PM
#27:


kirbymuncher posted...
said yes, rolled the site and got trespassing

I think I got off about as easy as possible, I can do that in like 2 minutes and it will inconvenience essentially no one
Bro you can get straight up murdered for trespassing in some places.
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PballDepot
11/08/23 10:40:56 PM
#28:


Crimes on Indian Reservations

funny enough I've done this one before, involved getting drunk at a dry indian casino in which they just let us go, nice people

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Shotgunnova
11/08/23 10:41:38 PM
#29:


Carljank posted...
https://perchance.org/j82meg5oiq
https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/forum/5/5cf9fc80.jpg

Bestow billions unto me, comrade.

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LeoRavus
11/08/23 10:41:43 PM
#30:


I got forcible rape.

Don't know how that's different from normal rape.

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ANort175
11/08/23 10:44:55 PM
#31:


Tampering with consumer products, so like going into a store and messing with something without buying it? Sounds super easy and low risk.

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FlyEaglesFly24
11/08/23 10:45:33 PM
#32:


Cant do it. Have no problem Jaywalking or going 50 in 40mph zone, but having to live with a DUI or murder or some other crime that would drive my conscience crazy just for the money, cant do it.

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MabusIncarnate
11/08/23 10:47:05 PM
#33:


I was gonna say no. Then I got "Financial transactions with a foreign government" and figure any government can forgive and forget for a cool billion.

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Tyranthraxus
11/08/23 10:47:36 PM
#34:


Well at least we know how I got my $100 billion

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/forum/e/e1b4bb69.jpg

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Dragon239
11/08/23 10:53:24 PM
#35:


Yeah, ok.
"Assaulting or Killing Federal Officer"
Assaulting, ok. A little risky, but doable.

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kirbymuncher
11/08/23 10:53:50 PM
#36:


unclekoolaid73 posted...
Bro you can get straight up murdered for trespassing in some places.
well first of all I live in a civilized country so that's a lot less likely than if I was in the USA

but a more obvious reason is that it's currently 11pm, I could climb the fence into my neighbour's yard and sit there on the ground for a few minutes and then climb back out and chances are no one would ever even know

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Anteaterking
11/08/23 10:54:37 PM
#37:


How does it work if I get something that I'm not capable of doing? Like not as a moral thing but like...what if I get a crime that logistically I am unable to commit (say, something only a CEO would be guilty of)

My random roll was Copyright Matters which seems trivial.

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GZAgenius
11/08/23 10:55:59 PM
#38:


Transportation into state prohibiting sale?

Been there done that, gimme my money.

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Glob
11/08/23 10:56:50 PM
#39:


What if I am not capable of doing the crime?
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rideshort
11/08/23 10:58:31 PM
#40:


I don't think sabotage by US law standards is worth it.

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Jiek_Fafn
11/08/23 10:59:14 PM
#41:


"Criminal infringement of Copyright"
I'm about to publish my Sonic fanfics

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Glob
11/08/23 11:03:19 PM
#42:


https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/forum/d/dc0ef988.jpg
Oh dear.
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Ricemills
11/08/23 11:04:55 PM
#43:


100 billions is a lot, you can pay people to escape the punishment.

Didn't realize there's a generator.
Got "Advocating Overthrow of Government".

So what i already did but I got 100 billions as a bonus? Sweet!

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bigtiggie23
11/08/23 11:05:46 PM
#44:


The first crime I got was "serial murders". Don't know how to proceed from there.

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BunkerBoy
11/08/23 11:07:49 PM
#45:


I don't really understand how this is a crime?
https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/forum/8/87625ef2.jpg
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cjsdowg
11/08/23 11:10:22 PM
#46:


With so many crimes in the book, I would take my chances on it not being something that would hurt someone else that bad. If it does, I take my I go out like a champ. At least I can get money by risking my life. I mean I don't have kids or a wife so not many people would miss me anyway .

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bigtiggie23
11/08/23 11:13:30 PM
#47:


Even with that money could you live with yourself if the crime was something like child abuse?

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Mechu
11/08/23 11:14:32 PM
#48:


https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/forum/8/8fca5c97.jpg



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BewmHedshot
11/08/23 11:15:56 PM
#49:


Conspiracy to Impede or Injure an Officer

I'm all about it, I'll conspire to fuck with Rafael 'Ted' Cruz twice for 100 billion.
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KitKats
11/08/23 11:18:21 PM
#50:


The random generator said importation of drugs

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