Current Events > Fuck! I think I finally got my first hemmy >_>

(+) Yeah! (+)

What do you do for this? My only knowledge is from Austin Power 3 where Dr. Evil talks about how Prep H feels good on the hole >_>

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mi5kXcc-TJ8

poop! awahaha! HAHAHAHAHAHAH! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA AINSAIAAHAHAHAHAHA

Prep H, avoid spicy food, and be prepared for blood at some point in time.

You can get 'em removed at the hospital too if you go that route.

Fibre

don't drink alcohol

I used to get them pretty regularly like 7 years ago.

I think it was stress, mostly. I've rarely gotten them since moving into my own apartment.

Nothing helped except suppositories. Topical ointments like Prep H etc just made it burn like crazy.

Are you gonna buy a hemorrhoid donut and bring it with you everywhere to sit?

It's on the outside and it isn't bleeding. Still I had this nagging pain all day in my butthole and was like "WTF is going on? Did a ghost fuck me last night or something!?" I looked it up and it looks like a hemmy >_>

R_Jackal posted...

You can get 'em removed at the hospital too if you go that route.

Do they come back or is this a one time thing? I've never had a hemmy before and I don't want to start now lol

Cool, is it a Redeye?

DirkDiggles posted...

Cool, is it a Redeye?

What's a redeye?

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

That's a hemi. A hemmy is swelling on your butthole from some vein bullshit idk >_>

I'm too tired to go to the store to get preparation h right now cuz I worked like 12 hours. Can I just jam an ice cube in there to dull it a bit? >_>

DKBananaSlamma posted...

Do they come back or is this a one time thing? I've never had a hemmy before and I don't want to start now lol

Youre more likely to get them again in the future type thing, but I believe that's correlation more than cause

Anyway, ones on the rim aren't all that bad. Sometimes they pop. Sometimes they don't. They usually resolve themselves in a few days.

They fucking smell awful though. Like normally your ass smells like ass, but if you're squating over a mirror taking a look you'll get hit with an awful whiff.

so your butt hurt?

DKBananaSlamma posted...

Do they come back or is this a one time thing? I've never had a hemmy before and I don't want to start now lol

You can get new ones, but there's nothing particularly that causes it. Healthier diet, higher fiber intake, and less alcohol usually means they won't. Got 'em once, couldn't deal with that shit at all, got 'em removed and they haven't come back.

Jiek_Fafn posted...

Youre more likely to get them again in the future type thing, but I believe that's correlation more than cause

Anyway, ones on the rim aren't all that bad. Sometimes they pop. Sometimes they don't. They usually resolve themselves in a few days.

They fucking smell awful though. Like normally your ass smells like ass, but if you're squating over a mirror taking a look you'll get hit with an awful whiff.

Oh dear. I didn't notice any smells. I also havent pooped yet since I got this, so I'm not looking forward to that. I heard I can't strain too much or it'll make the hemmy worse

pikakaeru posted...

so your butt hurt?

I am LITERALLY butthurt right now!

I regret making my previous message in this topic.

DKBananaSlamma posted...

What's a redeye?

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/0/7/4/AAam6dAAE0H6.jpg
https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/0/7/3/AAam6dAAE0H5.jpg

AirFresh posted...

I regret making my previous message in this topic.

I laughed so it's cool lol

What's fucked up is that my diet has been really good for months. I've lost like 35 pounds, eating more salad, rarely having alcohol. Damn my healthy diet FUCKED me lol

it can definitely come back.
constipation for long time can also cause it.

AirFresh posted...

I regret making my previous message in this topic.

if there were no hemorrhoids involved it would have felt fine

I appreciate all the advice so far. Thank you for guiding my butt >_>

DKBananaSlamma posted...

Oh dear. I didn't notice any smells. I also havent pooped yet since I got this, so I'm not looking forward to that. I heard I can't strain too much or it'll make the hemmy worse

It's anal mucous. You make more because there's an irritation and it fucking stinks. Youll also want to periodically do maintenance dabs to lessen that being there. Now this conversation has reminded me of former poster Awesome

Jiek_Fafn posted...

former poster Awesome

The guy who shit his bed? And didn't seem to understand it wasn't normal to wake up with skidmarks in your sheets?

Jiek_Fafn posted...

It's anal mucous. You make more because there's an irritation and it fucking stinks. Youll also want to periodically do maintenance dabs to lessen that being there. Now this conversation has reminded me of former poster Awesome

Alright, I'll duck in the bathroom at work every few hours and just do a safety wipe and see. Maybe I'll get baby wipes too.

BunkerBoy posted...

The guy who shit his bed? And didn't seem to understand it wasn't normal to wake up with skidmarks in your sheets?

Yeah
DKBananaSlamma posted...

Alright, I'll duck in the bathroom at work every few hours and just do a safety wipe and see. Maybe I'll get baby wipes too.

And yeah. Slightly wet tp works too. Try to dab and not wipe much when youre just actually dealing with it. You'll essentially scrape it whiping too much.

Also, if it bursts, it'll drain a long while but overall feel better because pressure is gone. I've essentially just packed my crack with tp at that point to avoid ruining pants and go about my day normally...well with a toilet paper diaper, but whatever

Also, sitting in a warm bathtub at home can make it feel better if it starts bothering you too much.

You can get medicated wipes specifically for hemorrhoids. Also can try suppositories.

Preparation H sucks.

Try to find calmoseptine instead. That shit is incredible.

There is also recticare. It's expensive but it works.

DKBananaSlamma posted...

Can I just jam an ice cube in there to dull it a bit? >_>

That's what i always do, it stops the pain for a bit, aloe Vera also works (although im not too sure if any skin cream with aloe helps)

This is gonna be TC.

https://youtu.be/pegIcAAv_EA?si=HqdZyevzMwTgg10D

BunkerBoy posted...

Are you gonna buy a hemorrhoid donut and bring it with you everywhere to sit?

The guy I used to play Magic with years ago had one burst on him. He told me doc said doughnuts were bad because it put extra pressure on the vessels or some such, unless it was a post-op doughnut to keep you off the wound site.

Don't know if medical opinions on hemorrhoids has changed since Onslaught block, though... it's been a while.

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/0/9/7/AADdfsAAE0IR.jpg

DnDer posted...

The guy I used to play Magic with years ago had one burst on him. He told me doc said doughnuts were bad because it put extra pressure on the vessels or some such, unless it was a post-op doughnut to keep you off the wound site.

Don't know if medical opinions on hemorrhoids has changed since Onslaught block, though... it's been a while.

I have no idea, lol. Just going by pop culture shit. Zero real world experience with hemorrhoids to draw from

Man, my ass felt GREAT this morning, but as soon as I started moving around and washed my ass in the shower, it flared up again >_> Man having a hemmy sucks

Have you tried soaking in warm water? Do it for like 15-20 minutes per session

Dreepapult posted...

Have you tried soaking in warm water? Do it for like 15-20 minutes per session

Well I gotta go to work now so I cant >_> I don't have some kind of shallow basin to shove my ass in either

No tub? That's what I do. I know some people do the actual thing that fits onto the toilet. I don't have one of those

This is why boobs are better than ass: You don't get hemorrhoids on your boobs!

I had a really nasty one about a year ago battling some bad constipation. Literally bled through my clothes onto my car seat it was fucking awful.

Prep H wipes, soaking in a tub, and overall just trying not to move made it heal after two ish weeks.

Should I get in the zone? (the proctozone)

Cemith posted...

overall just trying not to move made it heal after two ish weeks.

That ain't fucking happening with my job LOL. I'll figure something out I guess >_>

Well since we're on the topic of blood and shit and stuff, I'm kinda worried I'm gonna develop a hemorrhoid since I recently noticed occasional blood when I wipe (not in my stool though) since as far back as December. Probably had it happen at least once or twice a month since then, but not super recently. Think the last one I remember was in June or July.

I mentioned it to my doctor when I saw him but he kinda just didn't really address it seeing as how I was also there for something a little more important (antidepressants). But I haven't experienced anything like what Neon's going through at the moment. I'm a 30 y/o type 1 diabetic as well btw if that makes any difference.

DKBananaSlamma posted...

That ain't fucking happening with my job LOL. I'll figure something out I guess >_>

Yeah the irony is it probably happened because of my sedentary job but only really healed because of it too.

Just a speed bump on the Hershey highway

I went to the doc one time for a really bad one. I don't know how big it was but it was very external.

Doc happened to have a med student at the time. So I remember talking with both of them while they're looking at my b-hole and kind of poking at the hemorrhoid. Weird experience man. I don't recall that they ended up actually doing anything. He said if it got much worse they could consider draining it but at the present time he didn't feel it was a good idea. I toughed it out and eventually it went away

Ive had dem longer then I would like to admit. I clean myself with a moistened paper towel, I use Viva Signature Cloth. My roids havent bothered me in years.

Hemorrhoids come because of 3 reasons mainly.

stress, hygiene and pushing too hard.

and when they flare up they either hurt like a bitch or itch like a bitch.

and yes they CAN come back at any time.

years ago I had one burst after a big #2, the amount of blood was a cause for panic at that time and I almost fainted. But it didnt bleed more than what was there. It actually felt better.

but you need to watch for infection if it does burst.

Oh you can also look for this perineal cleansing foam stuff. That seemed to help too with some of my worst ones. Good for getting everything really clean down there but also really mild.