Current Events > Fuck! I think I finally got my first hemmy >_>

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DKBananaSlamma 09/06/23 7:58:56 AM #51:	Man, I didnt know there's this big wonderous world of various medicines to put in my ass. Appreciate all the suggestions --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975891968] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>Man, I didnt know there's this big wonderous world of various medicines to put in my ass. Appreciate all the suggestions </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Dreepapult 09/06/23 8:03:10 AM #52:	Oh yes. Many options for fixing the anus --- Entropy happens <cite>Dreepapult posted [p:975892013] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>Oh yes. Many options for fixing the anus </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DKBananaSlamma 09/06/23 10:45:49 AM #53:	Honestly it feels pretty good today. I only took a motrin to reduce pain and swelling (No prep h or da zone yet).I'm hopping around but my butthole feels great! There's still a bulbous mass on it tho, but barely any pain unless I touch it, which I just did with my bi-hourly safety wipe. --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975894421] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>Honestly it feels pretty good today. I only took a motrin to reduce pain and swelling (No prep h or da zone yet).I'm hopping around but my butthole feels great! There's still a bulbous mass on it tho, but barely any pain unless I touch it, which I just did with my bi-hourly safety wipe. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DKBananaSlamma 09/06/23 1:56:09 PM #54:	Just sitting in a sofa at work, thinking about smearing cream all over my butthole when I get home. --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975897877] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>Just sitting in a sofa at work, thinking about smearing cream all over my butthole when I get home. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Seaman_Prime 09/06/23 3:53:18 PM #55:	I have one thats inactive now, but every couple of months itll flare up and pop within like a day. But it was never too painful, probably cause its not those deep ones. But yeah the cream does feel nice lol <cite>Seaman_Prime posted [p:975900356] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>I have one thats inactive now, but every couple of months itll flare up and pop within like a day. But it was never too painful, probably cause its not those deep ones. But yeah the cream does feel nice lol</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DKBananaSlamma 09/06/23 9:39:09 PM #56:	Alright, I got preperation H. Time to put it on my butt. I'll let you guys know how it goes >_> --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975907279] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>Alright, I got preperation H. Time to put it on my butt. I'll let you guys know how it goes >_> </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Poorly 09/06/23 9:41:00 PM #57:	pikakaeru posted... so your butt hurt? My ass hole itching --- <cite>Poorly posted [p:975907318] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>pikakaeru posted... </cite><quote>so your butt hurt?</quote>My ass hole itching </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Poorly 09/06/23 9:42:36 PM #58:	DKBananaSlamma posted... Alright, I got preperation H. Time to put it on my butt. I'll let you guys know how it goes >_> They used actors to promote deir product. Go to see a real doctors man. --- <cite>Poorly posted [p:975907351] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>DKBananaSlamma posted... </cite><quote>Alright, I got preperation H. Time to put it on my butt. I'll let you guys know how it goes >_></quote>They used actors to promote deir product. Go to see a real doctors man. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
OriginalPlain2 09/06/23 9:42:36 PM #59:	I let mine resolve on its own --- 41 And whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain. 3 Know ye not that we shall judge angels? how much more things that pertain to this life? <cite>OriginalPlain2 posted [p:975907353] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>I let mine resolve on its own </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DKBananaSlamma 09/06/23 9:43:32 PM #60:	WTF, smearing this shit on my butthole is harder than I thought. I was using 2 hands to spread my buttcheeks to see the hemorrhoid, but when I took my hand off to put the medicine on the hemmy, it's hard to get in there and see when the buttcheek goes back in place. So I put some spare stat points I had on hand into my dexterity stat halfway through the process and developed this technique where my left hand holds the buttcheek open and the right palm holds the other buttcheek open, while I rotate my hand so my finger with the prep h on it can get right in there and rub it on the hemmy. I'm pretty proud of it and I wanted to share it with my peers. Good use of stat points imo Also I'm so glad I took a bunch of medical gloves from work >_> I am not doing this barehanded! --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975907373] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>WTF, smearing this shit on my butthole is harder than I thought. I was using 2 hands to spread my buttcheeks to see the hemorrhoid, but when I took my hand off to put the medicine on the hemmy, it's hard to get in there and see when the buttcheek goes back in place. So I put some spare stat points I had on hand into my dexterity stat halfway through the process and developed this technique where my left hand holds the buttcheek open and the right palm holds the other buttcheek open, while I rotate my hand so my finger with the prep h on it can get right in there and rub it on the hemmy. I'm pretty proud of it and I wanted to share it with my peers. Good use of stat points imoAlso I'm so glad I took a bunch of medical gloves from work >_> I am not doing this barehanded! </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DKBananaSlamma 09/06/23 9:45:54 PM #61:	It kinda went like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRd1jMoauGs --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975907425] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>It kinda went like this:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRd1jMoauGs </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Poorly 09/06/23 9:46:54 PM #62:	DKBananaSlamma posted... It kinda went like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRd1jMoauGs Dis guy still play dreamcast? --- <cite>Poorly posted [p:975907449] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>DKBananaSlamma posted... </cite><quote>It kinda went like this:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRd1jMoauGs</quote>Dis guy still play dreamcast? </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DKBananaSlamma 09/06/23 9:53:31 PM #63:	Poorly posted... Dis guy still play dreamcast? no clue. I just remembered that scene halfway through poking my butt and had to look it up. I'm glad there's a funny dub of it >_> Never played the game but that scene is a classic --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975907578] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>Poorly posted... </cite><quote>Dis guy still play dreamcast?</quote>no clue. I just remembered that scene halfway through poking my butt and had to look it up. I'm glad there's a funny dub of it >_> Never played the game but that scene is a classic </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
NeonTentacles 09/07/23 7:45:11 AM #64:	Ass feels pretty good but the hemmy is still the same size. I hope this ass cream brings it down soon >_> --- https://imgur.com/aMaI3hj https://imgur.com/7PsdJNc https://imgur.com/eK8vZVn https://imgur.com/u2HR4nG https://imgur.com/nQGM5cZ <cite>NeonTentacles posted [p:975913074] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>Ass feels pretty good but the hemmy is still the same size. I hope this ass cream brings it down soon >_> </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Poorly 09/07/23 10:38:58 AM #65:	NeonTentacles posted... Ass feels pretty good but the hemmy is still the same size. I hope this ass cream brings it down soon >_> Ur being punished by da ass goddess --- <cite>Poorly posted [p:975915445] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>NeonTentacles posted... </cite><quote>Ass feels pretty good but the hemmy is still the same size. I hope this ass cream brings it down soon >_></quote>Ur being punished by da ass goddess </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
NeonTentacles 09/07/23 10:39:41 AM #66:	This is why boobs are superior to ass --- https://imgur.com/aMaI3hj https://imgur.com/7PsdJNc https://imgur.com/eK8vZVn https://imgur.com/u2HR4nG https://imgur.com/nQGM5cZ <cite>NeonTentacles posted [p:975915460] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>This is why boobs are superior to ass </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DKBananaSlamma 09/07/23 1:28:46 PM #67:	Do I have to know anything before I take a phat dump? I'm about to pitch a loaf and dont want to mess up my hemmy >_> I know not to strain --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975918526] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>Do I have to know anything before I take a phat dump? I'm about to pitch a loaf and dont want to mess up my hemmy >_> I know not to strain </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Dreepapult 09/07/23 1:37:10 PM #68:	If you're at home I'd take a shower or bath after. Get it all clean again. But yeah otherwise just make sure it's time to go. Don't want to sit and strain. --- Entropy happens <cite>Dreepapult posted [p:975918666] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>If you're at home I'd take a shower or bath after. Get it all clean again. But yeah otherwise just make sure it's time to go. Don't want to sit and strain. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DKBananaSlamma 09/07/23 1:38:08 PM #69:	I did buy some baby wipes to help clean it better afterwards too. I hope they dont irritate it --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975918687] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>I did buy some baby wipes to help clean it better afterwards too. I hope they dont irritate it </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DKBananaSlamma 09/07/23 1:48:44 PM #70:	MAN! It feels really weird to wipe my butt and feel this lump there lol --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975918887] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>MAN! It feels really weird to wipe my butt and feel this lump there lol </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Metal_Gear_Raxis 09/07/23 1:53:02 PM #71:	Since we're on the subject, bananas of all things give me really bad soft stool that's hard to pass. Sucks because I really like bananas :( --- As the morning sun rises, my lingering memories fade. I no longer see your silhouette. It's too far gone into the haze. <cite>Metal_Gear_Raxis posted [p:975918965] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>Since we're on the subject, bananas of all things give me really bad soft stool that's hard to pass. Sucks because I really like bananas :( </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DKBananaSlamma 09/07/23 1:53:54 PM #72:	Maybe season it with some meti mucil? >_> --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975918978] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>Maybe season it with some meti mucil? >_> </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Nirvanas_Nox 09/07/23 1:56:59 PM #73:	DKBananaSlamma posted... It's on the outside and it isn't bleeding. Still I had this nagging pain all day in my butthole and was like "WTF is going on? Did a ghost fuck me last night or something!?" I looked it up and it looks like a hemmy >_> Witch hazel, prep h, sitz baths, and boxers. Not briefs. I saw you got baby wipes they might help if they are unscented otherwise it'll just burn. Also can't stress this enough take a bath with Epsom salt it helps --- Make sure not to bleed over the discs.- Xiciassa NOT IN MY CANTINA! - Bartender <cite>Nirvanas_Nox posted [p:975919031] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>DKBananaSlamma posted... </cite><quote>It's on the outside and it isn't bleeding. Still I had this nagging pain all day in my butthole and was like "WTF is going on? Did a ghost fuck me last night or something!?" I looked it up and it looks like a hemmy >_></quote>Witch hazel, prep h, sitz baths, and boxers. Not briefs. I saw you got baby wipes they might help if they are unscented otherwise it'll just burn. Also can't stress this enough take a bath with Epsom salt it helps </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DKBananaSlamma 09/07/23 1:57:31 PM #74:	I've always done boxers thankfully. I want my boyz to breathe --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975919043] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>I've always done boxers thankfully. I want my boyz to breathe </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Nirvanas_Nox 09/07/23 1:58:39 PM #75:	I added to my comment but try a bath or a sitz bath with Epsom salt. --- Make sure not to bleed over the discs.- Xiciassa NOT IN MY CANTINA! - Bartender <cite>Nirvanas_Nox posted [p:975919072] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>I added to my comment but try a bath or a sitz bath with Epsom salt. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DKBananaSlamma 09/07/23 1:59:57 PM #76:	I still gotta find a basin but I'll soak my ass if I can. Thanks --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975919101] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>I still gotta find a basin but I'll soak my ass if I can. Thanks </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DKBananaSlamma 09/07/23 5:39:24 PM #77:	Walking around work with this gooey cream in butt feels so weird >_> It honestly feels like I got...you know lol --- Neon >_> <cite>DKBananaSlamma posted [p:975923051] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>Walking around work with this gooey cream in butt feels so weird >_> It honestly feels like I got...you know lol </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Monferno_AQW 09/07/23 8:05:04 PM #78:	One day, I got out of bed one afternoon and had to sit in judgment on the porcelain throne as I contemplated the day's decrees. I noticed something was off as I dropped a resume in the bowl, so I looked in. Lo and behold, I looked upon the Red Sea. My heart stopped for a moment, then I cleaned myself up and went to the doctor. For $1000, not only did she take some of my blood to run some bloodwork on me, but she also took me to second base by shoving a pair of her fingers right up main street. An awkward silence fell as I let out a loud moan. Her fingers came out clean and she told me I merely passed a tough stool that nicked a blood vessel on the way out. She gave me prescriptions for this and that, and gave me her number to call if it got worse. 2 years later, I'm now buying hemorrhoid cream and wondering why she not only never told me it was possible I had hemorrhoids, but why, when I call her number, I now get Pizza Hut instead. Seriously though, fuck hemorrhoids. Taking that first shit of the day has always been so satisfying, and now it sucks. --- Switch Friend Code: SW-5881-7864-9002 <cite>Monferno_AQW posted [p:975925993] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>One day, I got out of bed one afternoon and had to sit in judgment on the porcelain throne as I contemplated the day's decrees. I noticed something was off as I dropped a resume in the bowl, so I looked in. Lo and behold, I looked upon the Red Sea. My heart stopped for a moment, then I cleaned myself up and went to the doctor. For $1000, not only did she take some of my blood to run some bloodwork on me, but she also took me to second base by shoving a pair of her fingers right up main street. An awkward silence fell as I let out a loud moan. Her fingers came out clean and she told me I merely passed a tough stool that nicked a blood vessel on the way out. She gave me prescriptions for this and that, and gave me her number to call if it got worse.2 years later, I'm now buying hemorrhoid cream and wondering why she not only never told me it was possible I had hemorrhoids, but why, when I call her number, I now get Pizza Hut instead.Seriously though, fuck hemorrhoids. Taking that first shit of the day has always been so satisfying, and now it sucks. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DnDer 09/08/23 12:18:28 AM #79:	DKBananaSlamma posted... Do I have to know anything before I take a phat dump? I'm about to pitch a loaf and dont want to mess up my hemmy >_> I know not to strain You have to know that the idiom you're trying to use is "pinch a loaf." --- What has books ever teached us? -- Captain Afrohead Subject-verb agreement. -- t3h 0n3 <cite>DnDer posted [p:975930684] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>DKBananaSlamma posted... </cite><quote>Do I have to know anything before I take a phat dump? I'm about to pitch a loaf and dont want to mess up my hemmy >_> I know not to strain</quote>You have to know that the idiom you're trying to use is "pinch a loaf." </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
NeonTentacles 09/09/23 4:29:57 AM #80:	^My bad. Powering through work with a hemmy is going okay so far. Even tho I'm hopping around I feel fine. It still hasnt shrunk much yet >_> --- https://imgur.com/aMaI3hj https://imgur.com/7PsdJNc https://imgur.com/eK8vZVn https://imgur.com/u2HR4nG https://imgur.com/nQGM5cZ <cite>NeonTentacles posted [p:975952657] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>^My bad.Powering through work with a hemmy is going okay so far. Even tho I'm hopping around I feel fine. It still hasnt shrunk much yet >_> </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Notti 09/12/23 2:25:30 AM #81:	I knew a guy who had to walk everywhere with his donut pillow. Get it taken care of --- http://m.youtube.com/TheYoungTurks/videos Bernie>Biden>poo>Trump http://RightWingWatch.org http://reddit.com/r/BreadTube http://fb.me/OccupyDemocrats <cite>Notti posted [p:976010671] in Fuck! I th... [t:80557146]...</cite> <quote>I knew a guy who had to walk everywhere with his donut pillow. Get it taken care of </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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Current Events > Fuck! I think I finally got my first hemmy >_> (+) Yeah! (+)

Current Events > Fuck! I think I finally got my first hemmy >_>