Poll of the Day > You ever have a buddy and they seem cool until you see them talk to girls?

(+) Yeah! (+)

There's a lot more guys that are bad with girls than I thought. Like most of my buddies at work seem like chill guys, until a girl they like is around then they get pretty cringey. Definitely boosts my self esteem seeing so many other guys being bad with girls.

Im only good at talking to girls. Dudes are freaking weird.

Thats the spirit. 195th time is the charm.

do you think you'll ever grow up and call them women since you're in your mid-20s?

Jen0125 posted...

do you think you'll ever grow up and call them women since you're in your mid-20s?

I don't see why using a different term that means the same thing has anything to do with being grown up or not

Because girl is a colloquial term for a young or child female. Calling grown women "girls" is very immature, infantalizing and patronizing.

There are women who like to call themselves girls though.
Once I heard a woman in her fifties call herself a girl.

Cacciato posted...

Thats the spirit. 195th time is the charm.

lol

LeetCheet posted...

There are women who like to call themselves girls though.

This.
There are men who like to call themselves boys.
There are men and women who like to call themselves guys.

LeetCheet posted...

There are women who like to call themselves girls though.
Once I heard a woman in her fifties call herself a girl.

if a woman wants to do it that is her own business. you're not her and you don't get to dictate what she calls herself. but you shouldn't infantilize women right out of the gate by calling 25+ year olds "girls"

Zareth posted...

This.
There are men who like to call themselves boys.
There are men and women who like to call themselves guys.

what men do you know would call themselves "boy?" outside of "me and the boys" which is a colloquial term. i don't know a single man that is a grown adult that would say "i'm a boy"

Very unusual of you to assume anyone who calls women girls is infantilizing them.

just another topic with blatant misogyny really lol but obviously men wouldn't see it or want to acknowledge it and actually change their rhetoric when it comes to women's issues.

Cacciato posted...

Thats the spirit. 195th time is the charm.

lmao

Zareth posted...

Very unusual of you to assume anyone who calls women girls is infantilizing them.

https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/2021/08/09/why-calling-women-girls-is-a-bigger-deal-than-you-may-think/?sh=3934ca262fda

https://scholarworks.uni.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1072&context=etd

it's not just me but thank you for trying

i'm not going to argue with a bunch of men about a woman's issue. you can read about it for yourself and hopefully figure it out and change your behavior. good luck.

Jen0125 posted...

Because girl is a colloquial term for a young or child female. Calling grown women "girls" is very immature, infantalizing and patronizing.

I'm not saying it can't be used to infantilize girls but that matters on the context not the word itself and I'm pretty sure I wasn't doing that.

Jen0125 posted...

just another topic with blatant misogyny really lol but obviously men wouldn't see it or want to acknowledge it and actually change their rhetoric when it comes to women's issues.

Calling women "girls" isn't misogyny, just like calling men "boys" isn't misandry. You're pulling the misogyny card because literally everyone is disagreeing with you right now. It's worth pointing out that disagreeing with a woman also isn't misogyny.

faramir77 posted...

It's worth pointing out that disagreeing with a woman also isn't misogyny.

Literally no one said that

Yeah I gotta disagree on this one too.

Me and my friends (male and female) have all just turned 30/31 and we still refer to them as just guys and girls not men and women.

I mean going through my chats with my female friends even they only ever refer to women as girls and not just in a me and the girls sense. The exception seems to be unless specifically talking about somebody 40/50+ depending on context. My girlfriend definitely does the same too.

Admittedly I havent read either of the articles yet but on the face of it I wouldnt have associated it with misogyny

Men don't associate infantilizing women with misogyny news at 11 lmao

lol Im not really saying that, just saying would it count as women infantilising women if (the female friends I have at least) do the same?

Also I get what the Forbes article is saying, especially in a work setting. Refers to another study I havent read yet which probs has more info there but the second study suggests something different.

So people in that study arent necessarily passing judgment on a womans success, maturity etc. by her being described as a woman or girl or person. Which in my case is what I would have expected and what Ive seen in my social circles.

Contrary to the hypotheses, the participants did not perceive Erin differently on how responsible, warm, understanding, successful, feminine, gullible, or childlike they thought she was, regardless of whether the participants were in the woman, girl, or person condition, but the lack of an effect on the manipulation check makes it unclear what this result means.

I see Jen is just as insufferable as ever. Bitching about Muscles using the word girl while having an open topic where she calls herself a girl in the title.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

I get that but like, I expected it to be less prevalent than I thought. I thought it was mostly neckbeard/weirdo types, but it seems like regular dudes are weird with women too.

I think you shouldn't get mad when a guy calls a woman a girl when she is calling herself that.

Every single thing you don't agree on isn't misogyny.

"Oh no, a guy opened the door for me? He think I'm unable to open the door myself?! Misogyny!!1"

I've seen women complain about this. Not saying everyone is like this, but so many women nowadays are constantly nitpicking about mundane shit like calling a woman a girl.
It's tiring...

Good for you muscles.

As a girl myself I'm happy to step in and give everyone a free pass and say jen is wildly overreacting.

It's bothersome that there really isn't a female analog of "guys" that doesn't also refer to juvenile females, but that doesn't mean that using "girls" to colloquially refer to adult women is infantilizing them. It wouldn't surprise me if that was part of the term becoming colloquially used in such a manner, since there's no shortage of such misogyny throughout history, but on a personal level there's no reason to believe that using the term means the speaker thinks less of the adult women in question.

Basically, the alternatives are "women" (which feels awkwardly formal) and "females" (which feels awkwardly clinical), neither of which really fit the mold of a casual colloquialism like "guys" does. People like speaking casually, so until a suitable casual term comes into vogue (which is something you really can't force, because anything that's forced is axiomatically not casual), we're stuck with "girls."

Maybe we just gotta start using 'gal(s)' more often.

Or "lass."

Jen0125 posted...

if a woman wants to do it that is her own business. you're not her and you don't get to dictate what she calls herself. but you shouldn't infantilize women right out of the gate by calling 25+ year olds "girls"

Why would anyone be dating girls over 25

Blightzkrieg posted...

Why would anyone be dating girls over 25

lmao

the only post that matters

AndyReklaw posted...

Maybe we just gotta start using 'gal(s)' more often.

gal pals is definitely a phrase

a weird one

but a phrase

TentacleDemon posted...

I see Jen is just as insufferable as ever. Bitching about Muscles using the word girl while having an open topic where she calls herself a girl in the title.

Yeah. I'm happy she has me blocked. This topic has sadly become a shit show because of some girl getting hot and bothered over nothing... again.

I've also heard 'guys and gals'. But it's definitely not something I've heard often.

After some googling it says it's derived from 'girls' (which I mean... I guess it's obvious in hindsight) so I dunno if it's much better.

AndyReklaw posted...

I've also heard 'guys and gals'. But it's definitely not something I've heard often.

After some googling it says it's derived from 'girls' (which I mean... I guess it's obvious in hindsight) so I dunno if it's much better.

It's derived from "girls," but it's generally not used to imply children (not without specifying, at least), so it's a much better fit for a casual way to refer to adult women. It's quite regional, though, so trying to use it outside of those regions is going to turn some heads.

AndyReklaw posted...

I've also heard 'guys and gals'. But it's definitely not something I've heard often.

From the top of my head:

Lad
Laddie
Boy
Man
Bloke
Fellow
Gent
Mister
Bro
Love
Duck
Guys
Babe

Lass
Lassie
Girl
Woman
Love
Madam
Miss
Sister
Duck
Chicks
Babe

AndyReklaw posted...

Maybe we just gotta start using 'gal(s)' more often.

adjl posted...

Or "lass."

How 'bout broads or dames or chicks or MILFs or something?

MILFs works

Hell yeah MILF that's what I'm talking about

Far-Queue posted...

How 'bout broads or dames or chicks or MILFs or something?

"MILFs" is specific to mothers, "chicks" carries some objectifying connotations (or at least carries the implication of talking about women in terms of dating them, outside of terms like "chick truck"). "Broads" and "dames" historically carried the same connotations as "chicks," but have been out of use for long enough that they could be repurposed into more general-purpose slang, so I could get behind that.

adjl posted...

It's derived from "girls," but it's generally not used to imply children (not without specifying, at least), so it's a much better fit for a casual way to refer to adult women.

That's a good point. Now that I think on it, referring to a kid as a gal would seem odd.

It's quite regional, though, so trying to use it outside of those regions is going to turn some heads.

Also fair. We need to figure out how to facilitate a culture shift.

Listen adjl there's really no way to please girls so we gotta compromise somewhere

Whatever happens, we're going to need to take a broad approach to this.

wwinterj25 posted...

Yeah. I'm happy she has me blocked. This topic has sadly become a shit show because of some girl getting hot and bothered over nothing... again.

I think she's still pissed about the Depp Heard hearing and letting her anger out on anything in regards to women, both good and bad.

MILF is a state of mind, adjl

At one of my girlfriend's old jobs (which ran a lot of broader museum-type stuff around the city), her boss wore a shirt on a few occasions that said "MILF" in large letters, with "Museum I'd like to fund" in much smaller font right underneath it, and it was apparently pretty hilarious to watch other people in the office building uncomfortably look away as soon as they read it.

lmaooo i love that

Arv will teach them

Kinda. I always knew dude was a douche but he could be fun. I enjoyed cock blocking him on a few occasions.

My favorite being one case. Quick back story he was homophobic but I convinced him several times to fool around with me. (He was of the mind a mouth is a mouth and I was slutty back then) So he was talking to these girls and mentioned his "12 inches of steel" I told him to stfu. Even if that line worked which it wouldn't but if it did they'd find out he was lying and he didn't want me explaining how I knew it was a lie. I made sure to say it loud enough the girls heard.