Current Events > Hot Take: It's wrong to shame people for committing suicide or attempting.

(+) Yeah! (+)

A person in endless pain decides to kill themselves to escape their suffering. All those 'left behind' people hurt for a brief period saying, "Why?" then get over it in a week or two. If that person had changed their mind they'd simply be continuing to suffer. It seems selfish when people say so and so shouldn't have killed themselves. I've built a pretty crazy life by radically challenging what I find acceptable and taking big risks. While these risks have paid off, I'm still the unhappy person I was before. Sobriety, learning coping techniques, two decades of time, nothing helps the scars heal over. Time just applies more hurt.

I am personally not making any plans right now specifically, but there is an overall longing for it to end.

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_Kowalski_ posted...

then get over it in a week or two

lol

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Had a friend that committed suicide in highschool. Came to my house to try to talk to me about it and I sent him away because I wanted to be anti-social. Apparently he had a brain tumor and judt killed himself instead of waiting to die. I have never gotten over it and I blame myself for at least not being there in his final moments. So fuck you for saying people would jsut get over it in a week or two.

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yutterh posted...

Had a friend that committed suicide in highschool. Came to my house to try to talk to me about it and I sent him away because I wanted to be anti-social. Apparently he had a brain tumor and judt killed himself instead of waiting to die. I have never gotten over it and I blame myself for at least not being there in his final moments. So fuck you for saying people would jsut get over it in a week or two.

Yeah I spent the last few hours with my old TA named Robbie Babcock before he shot himself in the heart. His folks were getting a divorce. I too had guilt wondering if i had done enough. Do you think the weight of your guilt outweighs the pain of your friend?

Speaking as someone who has been 52-50, survived attempts and an overdose, I'm skeptical. The last few weeks I've been thinking, what's a way for a human to totally disappear? People only get sad once the news is out.

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Bananana posted...

i agree that shaming those with suicidal thoughts or actions is wrong but this is a pretty fucking disgusting thing to post

It's extremely common for suicidal people to think this way or even that people will be better off.

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_Kowalski_ posted...

ll those 'left behind' people hurt for a brief period saying, "Why?" then get over it in a week or two.

Yeah, fucking NO.

This is so beyond wrong and fucked up.

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Completely agreed. They need compassion (and help if a failed attempt), not ostracization.

Edit: Okay maybe not completely.

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I feel like this topic is less "people shouldn't" and more "I shouldn't" and realize when TC says that people won't care after a week that's how he feels.

At least that's my takeaway.

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My cousin didn't kill himself, he got too drunk and choked on his own vomit and ended up brain dead. It's been 6 years now and I still cry whenever I think about him.

So, yeah, no. Sometimes it doesn't get easier. Pain or no. I have more examples of more fucked up deaths but I really don't feel like thinking about them.

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_Kowalski_ posted...

then get over it in a week or two

Yeah, you can go ahead and tell this to my friend who had his fiancee kill herself and hasn't even been on a date or hooked up in like two years since because he's messed up from it. I agree that that we really need to remove the stigma from mental health and especially against those with suicidal tendencies... but that is not the right mindset at all.