Board 8 > Ghosted someone intrusive.

(+) Yeah! (+)

omg THE DOG WAS WEARING SHOES

update is that she was in fact the dog
---

"... I thought you were the one who was interested in me. I'll admit I'd hoped to see where it might go... wanted to give things a chance. If anything out of this offends me, it's only that you wouldn't want to keep in contact. That, I don't get, unless you're just trying to convince yourself of your resolve.

If you ever choose to write to me again, please don't write to me as if I've been some kind of stalker.

I also don't think you've been cast in any of the ones I'm in, so no worries there."

That first paragraph was addressed in some stuff I originally cut out -- I think Seabass was right to say try not to allow room for the argument to get in-depth with her anymore, just saying.

That's a good line about resolve though, maybe I'll remember that and maybe I won't need that.

Her stalker-comment just tells me she wasn't getting how intrusive it was feeling. Our talks here about her being outside of my window's light-hearted enough, nothing serious there. That said, if I don't want to tell her where I live and she keeps asking and trying to deduce it -- and that fits a broader pattern where she's making me feel trapped, or attacked for distancing myself more -- that is serious and I'm allowed to be tired of these conversations taking my time. I don't know that she's a stalker -- probably not, non-zero chance though -- but she repeatedly wouldn't get my boundaries.

And fine about the shows either way I guess.

Not responding to her. Oh well, sincerely wish her (and her boyfriend she should have told me about much sooner like when I first said I liked her) well.
---

Eh, she definitely sounds a bit miffed, but I say all's well that ends well.

If the alternative to upsetting her is a scenario where she continues to not recognize when she is crossing the line then this seems fair.
---

Like I've told her twice now, I didn't know how to tell her no without hurting her feelings. I finally did, and yeah she's miffed. I'm glad she didn't lash out like some people would have, but no doubt she's mad and thought on this awhile (like me before I texted her for the last time).

Not sure how much being softer or nicer would have paid off, or not sending my last message at all...but I believe it's done now and that's what I wanted.

Then again, I thought it was done yesterday. Whoops -- life's something, ain't it.
---

Boring conclusion.
---

Oh and also she took my kidney.
---

More interesting conclusion.
---

Also, you think maybe the fact that she mentioned being a little like a stalker means she knows she was being a bit of a stalker and is just trying to put that on you now?
---

Yeah, it does feel like she's trying to gaslight you mildly, but hey this act's over.

After intermission: Where in the World Is Harrich's Kidney?
---

Solioxrz362 posted...

Also, you think maybe the fact that she mentioned being a little like a stalker means she knows she was being a bit of a stalker and is just trying to put that on you now?

I think she doesn't see her behavior as bad and is annoyed that he is saying it was.

But it sounds like it is basically over so thats good.
---

I don't think she was confessing to acting like a stalker, she just didn't want to be treated like one...which, I mean, sure, stalker-treatment's not preferable for anybody.

That said, I think Maniac's got it: she doesn't see the problem.

It's sparked a memory: when I told her I liked her but needed some space from her, she said something like "I'm glad you talked to me about this. I've had people just up and leave without talking before. Please talk to me if you feel like that again." I don't think anybody should be judged by having one or two people decide not to talk with them anymore...but also, as somebody not wanting to deal with her like that anymore and having given her a second chance, I think that comment stands out to me more now. =/
---

Just fuck her brains out, man.
---

Stsrting to wonder if she took over your account.....
---

I mean, her not telling you she had a boyfriend is the biggest red flag and the "stalker" stuff is relatively mild/not really surprising after that revelation.
---

Stalkerlicious
---

write a play about this
---

"Write a play with a boring conclusion."
--HanOfTheNokos
---

Emeraldegg posted...

Stalkerlicious

Yup, that's me!
---

New realization: she didn't acknowledge the discomfort I talked about. I understood she didn't "get it," but she went back to a previous thing I felt instead of acknowledging what I actually am feeling now that I'm done with her.

Sigh. I've been guilty of that before and I've felt bad about it in hindsight, with someone I knew for years if that matters. She may or may not feel bad too, but I don't know her like that and I'm not waiting.
---