Board 8 > B8UCA Discussion Topic X-25: Fatal Error

(+) Yeah! (+)

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Boko United - Geriatric Titanium Mustache
Guru Taken Miraculously by SuperNiceDog

For archival purposes, as seen at King of the Board.




[The lights in the arena go out.]



[Rad Link 5 comes out to the ring, holding a microphone. He has heavy bags under his eyes and seems a bit shaky.]

... Friday morning, I woke up to find a bear had prowled through my backyard, and was hiding in a tree across the street from me. I locked myself away in my house, and watched as my quiet suburban street turned into a media circuis. I told no one what I knew about the bear. I let them all believe it was just a confused woodland creature who unwittingly wandered into a human city and became disoriented. It took them half a day to sedate the bear, and when I thought it was safe, I finally left the confines of my home. I went to go see my fallen adversary... only to find it was not my adversary at all.

Friday afternoon, I was informed that there were no less than three bears prowling my quiet suburban neighborhood. All three had been spotted around my residence. To this point, only one has been captured. I locked myself back in the shelter of my home and prepared to wait out the rest of my days as a hermit, never daring to venture back out into the world.

Friday evening, a tornado unexpectedly hit my quiet suburban city, knocking out electricity, cable, and phone lines. I was isolated. Completely isolated. And it was during this isolation that I remembered: animals have a much keener sense for the weather than we humans. Here I was, trapped in my home without any means of communicating with the outside world, while at least two more bears were somewhere in my hometown. The timing couldn't be mere coincidence.

Ladies and gentlemen, I am tired. I am physically tired from not having slept, spending the entire night on alert, watching for possible intruders and waiting for the power to return. I am mentally tired from constantly having to try and stay five steps ahead of a godless killing machine. I am emotionally tired from constantly fearing for my safety at every turn.

I am tired. Tired of allowing this situation to continue. It's long past time I do something about this. Someone wants my life, my health, or my sanity. I want a bear to finally tell me who it is. And even more than all of that, I want to knock that bear out with The Hyperlink, and turn it into a nice rug in exchange for everything it's put me through.

At Summer Spectacular, I want to step into the ring one-on-one with that bear. I don't care if it's a normal singles match, a Grizzly Bear Cage Deathmatch, even a Lockbox Challenge; I haven't got the mental faculties left to choose a stipulation. I trust Tom or XIII to pick an appropriate match, because it's all the same to me. As soon as I step into that ring, the only thought that will be going through my mind is exacting my revenge.

BECAUSE I'M RAD LINK 5!

... And I'm gonna knock your brains out.

[Rad Link 5 returns backstage, twitching slightly.]

--
Ace Detective in Sir Chris' Police
http://i53.tinypic.com/ors1l0.gif

Poor Rad. Now Mother Nature has joined the Bear and its mysterious benefactor in torturing him.

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(Maniac64 at work)
All the proteins, vitamins, and carbs of your grandma's best turkey dinner, plus 15% alcohol.

*Grabs a mic and enters the ring while carrying a sealed envelope*

I have returned with good news. I have, over the past several weeks, been tasked with a full fledged investigation of the events that led to a good man's punishment. I am of course speaking of my tag team partner Drakeryn and how he has been falsely accused of heinous crimes against Tom. I knew in my heart that Drak would never do such a thing, that something fishy was going on with all of this mess. Along with this I have found the smoking gun when it comes to Whiskey on the Rock's blatant rallying, and it is here in this envelope. It is time to put an end to this charade... to restore Drak's honor, and to fulfill the promise that UCA started with. One free of the tyranny of greed and corruption that now courses through the very veins of this federation.

I'd say this doesn't give me any pleasure, but I was never a big believer on that whole lying thing. This is the end of an era, an era of filth. With great satisfaction and with tremendous pride let me present the contents of this envelope that will shake the very foundations of everything you thought you knew.

*Opens envelope*

*Lights suddenly go out for several seconds, when they come back I am laid out in the ring with a shattered bottle of vodka surrounding my head. The envelope is gone.*

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http://firsthour.net/screenshots/suikoden-2/suikoden-2-luca-blight.JPG
The Cult of Personality.

Vodka!?!

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http://img.imgcake.com/RegaroUlquiorrapngse.png
http://img.imgcake.com/drakeryn/regarojpgpe.jpg

Vodka?

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Not changing this sig until the Bengals, Bills, Browns and Lions win the Super Bowl (10/10/10)
The most American Canadian on Board 8

Vodka!

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(Maniac64 at work)
All the proteins, vitamins, and carbs of your grandma's best turkey dinner, plus 15% alcohol.

...

ON THE ROCKS!

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"With Harry, it's cool. We don't speak a lot and he doesn't care if I smile or if I know who the next team we play is." - Benoit Assou-Ekotto

Wow this is truly a terrible tragedy.

Poor Chris, I hope he is OK. The EMTs are tending to him as we speak and I hope he returns to health soon.

The attack gave me an idea, though, and that is the launch of an offshoot of the Whiskey on the Rocks™ brand. It is...Vodka on the Docks™!

Because of the rather upmarket nature of Whiskey on the Rocks™ brand products, not all of our elaborate production line reaches some people less fortunate than ourselves.

And so, inspired by the dock workers of Murmansk, Russia, we now introduce Vodka on the Docks™ brand Vodka - Vodka with all the quality you would expect from the creators of Whiskey on the Rocks™ brand Whiskey, but...it's Vodka, and it is the cheapest brand of Vodka you will find in stores*.

Now everybody can enjoy the alcohol-creating talent of the Whiskey on the Rocks™ brand.

Keep an eye out for Vodka on the Docks™ merch, including BEACH TOWELS, very soon!

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*May not actually be true.

Daquiri's on the Deck

Martini's on the March

Beer on the Boat

... XIII WE CAN SHILL SO MUCH MERCH!

--
Not changing this sig until the Bengals, Bills, Browns and Lions win the Super Bowl (10/10/10)
The most American Canadian on Board 8

Yes, there is a lot of potential for...expansion.

We shouldn't saturate the market too much, though.

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http://img.imgcake.com/22763810150194882301443717534644274676943735581nmu.jpg

Oh my God!!! Chris...



















's theme is This Fire Burns? That's awesome! Best in the UCA.

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Ace Detective in Sir Chris' Police
This place feels like Cheers. - smitelf on Board 8

I'm rather fond of Nee's theme, though I have absolutely no idea what it is from.

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http://www.mariocube.nl/upload/XIII1008171346.jpg

Margaritas in the Car

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i consider myself a very positive influence on the youths of my community
http://sonicgenerationart.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/slider15.jpg

Champagne Canoe

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Not changing this sig until the Bengals, Bills, Browns and Lions win the Super Bowl (10/10/10)
The most American Canadian on Board 8

From: XIII_rocks | #113
I'm rather fond of Nee's theme, though I have absolutely no idea what it is from.
Movin' To My Beat by J Boogie (feat. People Under the Stairs)

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Ace Detective in Sir Chris' Police
http://img38.imageshack.us/img38/9526/prosecutorshominamimoto.png

oh thanks.

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http://farm6.static.flickr.com/5261/5567070428_ee1dcd3590.jpg

we need some results imo

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Dr voltchball - best in the world.

Dr_Football posted...

we need some results imo

This.

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(Maniac64 at work)
All the proteins, vitamins, and carbs of your grandma's best turkey dinner, plus 15% alcohol.

Although I guess I should be scoring the boxing match since Im pretty sure Im the Boxing commissioner

--
Dr voltchball - best in the world.

First a correction

The original rules of a boxing match is what Tom said, except you win by either
1)Scoring 3 knockdowns in a single round (KO)
2)Scoring 5 knockdowns in the entire fight (TKO)
3)Outscoring your opponent (Judge's Decision)

WIth that said the result doesn't change either way

ROUND 1
Maniac wins 10-8, 1 KD
ROUND 2
Maniac wins 10-8, 1 KD
ROUND 3
Maniac wins 10-8, 1 KD
ROUND 4
Maniac scores 2 KD which means

MANIAC WINS BY TKO IN ROUND 4

--
Dr voltchball - best in the world.

Last nights results are mired in controversy right now.

Several formal complaints were sent to the GM offices of both Ruin and Combat.

The Whiskey on the Rocks Brand Faction is on it, but please be patient as my glorious Faction Friends are making sure the best occurs.

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Not changing this sig until the Bengals, Bills, Browns and Lions win the Super Bowl (10/10/10)
The most American Canadian on Board 8

Yeah. I counted the results last night, but there's just a couple of things that could...change. I'm waiting on Tom.

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http://i45.tinypic.com/2jdhsno.gif

*shadow boxes*

It was a very good fight Dante, and you almost had me in every round but that last one.

I'd say I just got lucky with getting something where you couldn't out grapple me.

That's one match down and one title secured.

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(Maniac64 at work)
All the proteins, vitamins, and carbs of your grandma's best turkey dinner, plus 15% alcohol.

Just give Football all of the titles already!

--
~Edwardsdv~ Captain America
http://www.sethskim.com/Captain%20America%20is%20Back2.jpg

TheCapisBack posted...

Just give Maniac all of the titles already!

Fixed

Hey, I was in matches for three of them.

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(Maniac64 at work)
All the proteins, vitamins, and carbs of your grandma's best turkey dinner, plus 15% alcohol.

From: Dr_Football | #121
ROUND 1
Maniac wins 10-8, 1 KD
ROUND 2
Maniac wins 10-8, 1 KD
ROUND 3
Maniac wins 10-8, 1 KD
ROUND 4
Maniac scores 2 KD which means

MANIAC WINS BY TKO IN ROUND 4
And then he kept punching him until the match was officially called!

Talk about killer instinct!

--
Ace Detective in Sir Chris' Police
http://i52.tinypic.com/2nar4wm.jpg

well uh my internet jobbed to the storm and/or the usual issues so send me a PM or something? I am aware of one issue but not multiple ones >_>

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http://i.imgur.com/VITyG.jpg

Rad Link 5 posted...

And then he kept punching him until the match was officially called!

Talk about killer instinct!

Those were clearly celebratory punches into the air!

It's not my fault Dante stood up behind me during a discus punch...

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"Hope is allowed to be stupid, unwise, and naive." ~Sir Chris

One, multiple ... it's a fine line

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Not changing this sig until the Bengals, Bills, Browns and Lions win the Super Bowl (10/10/10)
The most American Canadian on Board 8

Alright. Certain...voting quibbles have been ironed out so here are the official

PPV RESULTS

Nick and Maniac tied at 12 - def. KCF (5)
So uh.

Cobain and Football tied at 9 - def. ctes (6) and GTM (4)
I presume the title is still vacant and will be decided on Combat. Russo~.

Nee 18-10 ZeroSignal
Nee is still the B8UCA Champion
ZeroSig honestly did much better than anyone would have expected him to a month ago, but this was still a sound beating from the "Fanchise" of Tuesday Night Ruin.

Maniac 25-4 Koala
Maniac is still B8UCA Interboardinental Champion
Koala had the lead after the first...uh...vote. Koala has shown signs of real improvement recently but he was hopelessly and hilariously outclassed here.

Maniac d. Dante via KO
Maniac is still B8UCA MELEE MAYHEM Champion
I just looked for periods where Maniac got 3 votes in a row. That said, this has already been covered.

eaed d. WC by 2 falls to 1 (6-5, 6-7, 9-8)
eaed is still the LW champion
Perhaps the greatest 2/3 falls match in UCA history and a MotY candidate, this match was headed for yet ANOTHER tie when War's last-minute vote decided things.

War (13) def. DP (10), Sess (4) and ExTha (1)
War is #1 Contender to the B8UCA MW Title
Don't know if War is in the mood to win a title in his current...mood, but either way he will face KCF LIVE on Ruin, tonight! Also, lmao ExTha >_>

XIII 17-12 Boko
An honour to step into the ring with such a legend. We put on one hell of a match, and it could easily have gone your way.

--
"To be fair to Herman Cain, we can't all be as wise as Slowking when he's wearing the Shellder of knowledge. Look it up, b****es." - Jon Stewart

It is time, with apologies to my good buddy and right-hand man, for Tom decides!

Nick and Maniac will face off on Eruption to decide the one true King of the Board! However, I think they've both earned their stripes, so they will BOTH receive title shots at Summer Spectacular! Good show, gentlemen! Er, gentleman and turncoat!

Also this week will be a tiebreaker between Cobain and Football on COMBAT to crown the new HW Champ!

--
http://i.imgur.com/VITyG.jpg

. . . Oh is that how it is Tom ... well

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Not changing this sig until the Bengals, Bills, Browns and Lions win the Super Bowl (10/10/10)
The most American Canadian on Board 8

so alt voting is cool now?

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i consider myself a very positive influence on the youths of my community
http://sonicgenerationart.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/slider15.jpg

Only because I'm guessing that's not the alt of anybody who voted on their main.

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http://i.imgur.com/VITyG.jpg

Wait what

The "alt" vote counted or not?

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Dr voltchball - best in the world.

This betrayal Tom... I am left with only one thing to do

*pulls out the future storyline plans of the UCA and begins to read aloud*

Next week on Combat... *lights go out*

*lights come back on and Nick is gone*

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Not changing this sig until the Bengals, Bills, Browns and Lions win the Super Bowl (10/10/10)
The most American Canadian on Board 8

Because I counted 10-9 to me

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Dr voltchball - best in the world.

It takes a big man to challenge the Fanchise of the UCA, but it takes an even bigger one to admit defeat. I commend Nee on his victory last night, but rest assured while I spend my time steering the ship of the XFL away from all the bok-ing and complaining, I will not give up in my quest to be on top of the UCA once again.

--
http://zerosignal620.wordpress.com/
Dallas Cowboys: 8-8 --- Next Game: Next Year =(

swirl
Football
JONA
Zero
Rad
edwards
Reg
Kamikaze
Machete(Caelus)
ComingSoon

I demand satisfaction

--
Dr voltchball - best in the world.

From: Dr_Football | #140

swirl
Football
JONA
Zero
Rad
edwards
Reg
Kamikaze
Machete(Caelus)
ComingSoon

I demand satisfaction

Well... Looks like Football wins!

--
Shining Force IV will rise!

From: Whiskey_Nick | #137
*lights come back on and Nick is gone*
The UCA is becoming an old timey mystery thriller.

And I think I know who is behind all of this. My keen sense for details have led me to-

[The lights in the room go out.]







[The lights in the room come back on.]

[Rad Link 5 is missing.]

--
Ace Detective in Sir Chris' Police
http://i56.tinypic.com/2117wag.jpg

http://******faqs.com/posts/view/933670/page:17
http://******faqs.com/posts/view/991273

so tom will count votes from ComingSoon but not WhosComing?

a little consistency would be appreciated

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i consider myself a very positive influence on the youths of my community
http://sonicgenerationart.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/slider15.jpg

And I have no problem with the vote being thrown out

I would just like some consistency as well

Mainly with firing potential alts who are in UCA right this minute!

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Dr voltchball - best in the world.

I demand footballs satisfaction. Its corruption like this that has placed, tom and 13s rights to book in forfeit.

#fire13andtom

Long live the xfl.

Also bok bok bok 13.

Cowards.

--
The Kinda Real Deal
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

From: XIII_rocks | #311
Nick and Maniac tied at 12 - def. KCF (5)
This is just sad

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http://img.imgcake.com/kcftabletpnget.png

From: XIII_rocks | #131
XIII 17-12 Boko
An honour to step into the ring with such a legend. We put on one hell of a match, and it could easily have gone your way.


=)

--
Virtue - "You don't need a reason to Boko United."

ZeroSignal! Come out here!

I applaud you. For years, a solid victory against you has eluded me. It goes back to the beginning of the UCA days, when I was green as can be and had no fans to speak of. You put me in my place time and time again, as I slowly developed my skills and worked hard to earn my fanbase. If there are many tough tests one must face to achieve greatness in the UCA, ZeroSignal put me through his entire coursework of pain.

Over time I worked to exorcise the demon's that haunted me. Extha went down. Haguile went down. But ZeroSignal was forever a nagging in the back of my mind. You were the true foil to my excellence, and have been standing in my way of becoming the greatest of all time.

But finally! Last night at King of the Board, I put the demons to rest. The fans chanted my name. NEE! NEE! NEE! The roar was deafening. ZeroSignal gave me all he could. I laid it all on the line. Weeks of hard training finally came to a head, as it was shown how much that training was needed. I reached down deep at every turn to keep going. ZeroSignal was coated in perspiration. So was I. The crowd was shaking the walls of the building with their noise. On an evening with many fantastic matches, we did out part to entertain and give it our all. And as it neared the end, the crowd came to a hush as they sat on the edges of their seats. It is a match that entertained them to their core, and I was proud to be a part of it.

ZeroSignal. You have proven over time to be a worthy adversary. And while I have won this time, the score is still not even. I need to work more. In the future we will match up again, and I will work to turn the tide my way again.

Until then. *holds out his hand for ZeroSignal to shake*

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ONLY FIVE CAN LADDER.
Sushi, kamikaze, fujiyama, nippon-ichi...

I still demand satisfaction

--
Dr voltchball - best in the world.

KCF0107 posted...

This is just sad

You're telling me. I came in last AND lost the ctes AGAIN...

--
Boko United - Geriatric Titanium Mustache
Guru Taken Miraculously by SuperNiceDog