Current Events > as you get older, is there anything you realise that you're actually good/bad at

(+) Yeah! (+)

compared to most people you know in similar circumstances to you?

i realise that i have good social skills since i'm not anxious talking to new people, making friends and generally more extroverted than 90% of my work colleagues

but i also realise that i suck at puzzles, board games or anything which requires logic to them which comes naturally to a lot of people. i'm glad i'm not an engineer since i would be bad in that field

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Listening to people

i am pretty good at relating to people socially, as a kid i used to think i was really socially awkward but really it was just that i lacked confidence.

what i really suck at is anything number related, i basically have to have my hand held and go through it a hundred times

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mattymad posted...

Explaining things. I reckon I'd make a sweet teacher if I went in to that field. I have to do it a lot at work (software engineer). Anywhere from explaining complicated progamming stuff to fellow seniors, or laymen explaining it to non-technical people. I find it very easy to seamlessly adjust to the right level for the target audience.

that's a really good skill to have for a software engineer. i find that most others in my company really lack awareness (or maybe flat out don't care) about explaining concepts to non-technical people

Romulox28 posted...

as a kid i used to think i was really socially awkward but really it was just that i lacked confidence.

as you got older, did you gain that confidence? or just care less about it?

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This is a really general one but when I was a teenager I had that syndrome, what do you call it. My parents applauded literally anything I did and my teachers said I had potential all the time, so I pretty much thought I was a genius any time I got a decent mark on a test I didn't study for.

Then I got older and realised my intelligence is not remarkable and really I just had a solid education that many people don't get. Further to that, some people develop really specific and high value skillsets and I just don't have that. I wish I had a specific professional passion, because I'm at that stage in my life now where people younger than me have expertise in things

On the flipside it really is remarkable just how dumb many people are, how poor their education and how little critical thinking they apply to, well...anything.

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That I have both social skills while being logical minded. Its why I do so well at my job and Ive made a bit of a name for myself in my industry. Im not the most outgoing, extroverted person but I know how to build relationships with both tech and non tech people pretty well. I would probably make a good PM or sales engineer.

Parappa09 posted...

as you got older, did you gain that confidence? or just care less about it?

i gained it, a mixture of maturing as i grew older + getting myself to move out of my comfort zone & accomplish things to help build confidence

pinky0926 posted...

Then I got older and realised my intelligence is not remarkable and really I just had a solid education that many people don't get. Further to that, some people develop really specific and high value skillsets and I just don't have that. I wish I had a specific professional passion, because I'm at that stage in my life now where people younger than me have expertise in things

damn this really hits home

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i'm really, really bad with directions like probably the worst

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pinky0926 posted...

This is a really general one but when I was a teenager I had that syndrome, what do you call it. My parents applauded literally anything I did and my teachers said I had potential all the time, so I pretty much thought I was a genius any time I got a decent mark on a test I didn't study for.

Then I got older and realised my intelligence is not remarkable and really I just had a solid education that many people don't get. Further to that, some people develop really specific and high value skillsets and I just don't have that. I wish I had a specific professional passion, because I'm at that stage in my life now where people younger than me have expertise in things

fuck that is accurate for me as well

i'm not smart but i knew how to do well in the education system. it was 'easy' for me because it was devoting time to studying, not being a dick in class, memorising content and buidling a good relationship with teachers and lecturers so they'd grade you better

but rn i feel like i'm hitting capacity with my capabilities and compared to a lot of other people in the company. i'm so average. it's a weird mixture of feeling depressed that you're not as good as you thought you were, but also appreciating that you've done okay for yourself compared to family/some friends

Cleo_II posted...

That I have both social skills while being logical minded. Its why I do so well at my job and Ive made a bit of a name for myself in my industry. Im not the most outgoing, extroverted person but I know how to build relationships with both tech and non tech people pretty well. I would probably make a good PM or sales engineer.

PM is such a desirable field right now. what role is it again that you're doing now?

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Plain-ass communicating. I keep ending up as a mediator for things completely unrelated to me.

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All through high school I thought I was terrible at making conversation because I had a hard time making friends and came out of a lot of social interactions feeling awkward. But I'd be friends with my teachers and counselors and superintendents and everyone else in the staff. I'd go to work my retail job and again, kids my age would be weird but older customers loved me and would tell me I took great care of them. Bosses too, I'd joke with my managers constantly and the crew my age would just gossip with each other or be on their phones when I'm around.

To this day I'm great at communicating, get told all the time that I'm a pleasure to be around, easy to talk to and comforting.

Turns out teenagers are the weird ones who can't talk for shit. Even today an 18 year old will come in for something over the counter and guarantee they will avoid all eye contact and fumble their ID when trying to pull it out and reply only in one word mumbled answers.

I always thought I was the problem.

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not really, i generally feel i'm just a bit above average in most things and way below average on a few things. Probably the closest to that feeling I get is co-workers coming to me with questioning and realizing 5 or 10 years ago i would have been the one asking questions. But even the things i feel i am good at i feel like more more in the top 20% than like the top 5%. Which is enough for me to feel good with.

Parappa09 posted...

it was 'easy' for me because it was devoting time to studying, not being a dick in class, memorising content and buidling a good relationship with teachers and lecturers so they'd grade you better

more like PaNERDa09

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Parappa09 posted...

PM is such a desirable field right now. what role is it again that you're doing now?

I used to want to switch from being an engineer to a PM but I was never able to find the right opportunity and I was just over being an engineer.

I ended up going into technical recruiting. So I still talk to tech people all day but my engineering background is a huge help. Its also pretty rare for recruiters to have engineering degrees so Ive found that I have pretty good job security. If I somehow was laid off right now I can easily line up another role and not really lose much income. Its very nice not to worry.

Flockaveli posted...

Turns out teenagers are the weird ones who can't talk for shit. Even today an 18 year old will come in for something over the counter and guarantee they will avoid all eye contact and fumble their ID when trying to pull it out and reply only in one word mumbled answers.

I always thought I was the problem.

teenage years can really screw with people's minds. just what we go through at that time is not reflective of anything really since we build up everything in our head. watching big mouth has taught me that

I Like Toast posted...

more like PaNERDa09

i wouldn't call myself a nerd but i was comfortable being whatever that was lol

is there anything you feel like you could improve on, or that you realise that you might not be so good with?

Cleo_II posted...

I ended up going into technical recruiting. So I still talk to tech people all day but my engineering background is a huge help. Its also pretty rare for recruiters to have engineering degrees so Ive found that I have pretty good job security. If I somehow was laid off right now I can easily line up another role and not really lose much income. Its very nice not to worry.

if you're anything like me, you'll get the 2 year itch and want to move onto something else. but PM sounds perfect to your skills

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also @pinky0926 if you can remember the name of the syndrome you spoke about earlier, then let me know. i'm v interested in it

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I've noticed that I have a lot more real world patience than I initially thought.

I'm also slowly coming to the realization that I'm never going to really forgive my step-father and that the only way for me to quiet that demon is to make peace with it on my own rather than carry it with me everywhere.

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SquirtleSkwad posted...

I'm also slowly coming to the realization that I'm never going to really forgive my step-father and that the only way for me to quiet that demon is to make peace with it on my own rather than carry it with me everywhere.

that's good man, sounds like you're in better place regardless. hope it works out for the best.

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I've learned that I'm an extremely convincing liar from playing various lying games (Among Us, Jackbox's Faking it, etc.) with friends, and it's a bit concerning, as generally I would consider myself a very truthful, upfront person.

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JKwaffle posted...

I've learned that I'm an extremely convincing liar from playing various lying games (Among Us, Jackbox's Faking it, etc.) with friends, and it's a bit concerning, as generally I would consider myself a very truthful, upfront person.

what do you lie about with friends?

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Parappa09 posted...

what do you lie about with friends?

Like literally just in those games where the point is to get away as the Imposter or whatever. I'm just weirdly good at those games. >_>

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The opposite of OP

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Parappa09 posted...

if you're anything like me, you'll get the 2 year itch and want to move onto something else. but PM sounds perfect to your skills

Ive been doing it for 5 years now and surprisingly still enjoy it. Though I dont want to do it forever. Id love to move up to a manager role and work my way up the ladder.

Im really, really good at doing long term assignments that require a lot of concentration and constant diligence.

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I'm good at everything

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I'm not exactly sure if I'm good at it but I've become very confident about writing about things I'm passionate about and that seems to be rare among a lot of my peers.

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I'm better at math then most people I come across.

I'm good at bullshitting, which is weird to say, what I mean is that when sales people, both inside and outside, call me and want something or are pissed about something, I can calm them down or help them with what they need (or helping them find what they need if they don't actually know).
I'm also good at critical thinking - answering why questions.

I want to get a lot better at explaining myself and teaching.

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Not as I grow older, but I've always been a public speaker and never really afraid of being put on the spot.. this was mostly the result of pursuing musicianship as a trade for awhile. People skills came along with that along with mountains of empathy from being locked up in a room pretty much as a kid.. it all kind of flourished and worked out for me. Breaking complicated things down to an incredibly simple level or set of tasks to tackle is also I'm super proud of since it allows me to take a leader role of some sort usually.

Things I'm bad at? I guess knowing a bunch of statistics or facts, but I find people really love that since they LOVE sharing their mind with someone who doesn't know and me being a curious mind about everything made conversations so easy

I guess I don't take things as serious as I should tbh >_> that's something that really never sinks in.. I guess it's because although I have desires to go to a therapist to workout my problems I just laugh at everything or can compartmentalize things to the point I think I can literally laugh myself to age 99

Parappa09 posted...

that's good man, sounds like you're in better place regardless. hope it works out for the best.

Thanks man. It's difficult, for sure. But I don't wanna be angry all the time.

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More coming to terms whit the fact i never actually tried just kinda coasted by.

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I am really bad at small talk pointless writing in general.

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I've always been good a communication at a very early age, learned when to say Yes or No, and developed a work-driven mentality thanks to my parents. It's also why they were so supportive of me when I moved out when I was 17. It was time to go.

What I DO need to work on, however, is increasing my patience on people with their bullshit. Be more trusting on others instead of doing things all of my projects by myself.

I have both implosive and explosive anger and I'm confident that I've managed them to an even level, but there's always room to improve myself, because if you're not then what the fuck are you doing on this planet?

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theres some good responses itt, bumping it up

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I'm pretty mediocre at most things I do tbh

I guess I mostly agree with the idea behind overestimating competence

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Lying and Manipulating people. I do my best not to though, but it does make it quite easy to detect it in others.

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