Current Events > Started seeing a girl. She's unemployed, never went to school, and gets weird...

(+) Yeah! (+)

...when I can't hang out.

This is all very disappointing

Is it weird to get hung up on this stuff? I really liked her but this bugs me.

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you're cheating on her arent you?!

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She's never been to school? Does she know how to read?

she knows you are

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she ever give you this look?

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Weird? No. Heck never went to school and unemployed would have been a non-starter for me.

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so shes basically jodie foster from Nell?

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This is a woman waving multiple red flags in your face.

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Should add I didn't know about the lack of employment or education before I started seeing her

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DDirtyDastard posted...

She's never been to school? Does she know how to read?

I meant like college or university lol

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Doom_Art posted...

I meant like college or university lol

Wow, that's snobby as fuck to care

Lack of post-secondary education doesn't bother me that much, unless she's a ratchet type. Would not date someone unemployed though. Unless it's temporary and she's actively looking. The third one is just women in general.

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Sounds exactly like my ex lmao

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Doom_Art posted...

I really liked her butt, this bugs me.

Fixed

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If those things are important to you, why not discuss them earlier before you got more involved with this person?

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Doom_Art posted...

I meant like college or university lol

Oh so she's debt free? That's a plus.

TC sounds like a classist snob ngl

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sounds like a nonconformist winner TC, stick with her


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Doom_Art posted...

I meant like college or university lol

Eh, ive dated girls who didnt either. As long as they work hard and make their own money im cool.

If shes unemployed because of COVID then thats something but if shes been unemployed for a while thats a red flag for me

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Doom_Art posted...

I meant like college or university lol

Nerd.
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Yea I grew up in/live in a college town. It's also not quite as prohibitively expensive here as in the US so its just my experience that most people had some kinda postsecondary education

As for the unemployment stuff, she doesn't seem particularly ambitious and I've inferred through shit that she was jobless prior to the lockdown.

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Ask her what her future plans and goals are. It's not weird to be wary of getting into a long term relationship with someone who's future plans you're so unsure of.

Like, ya, I get that some people might not have big career or financial goals, but does she have any other things that she's got going on, like hobbies?

Just in the conversation, don't make it sound like you're belittling her or whatever.

The college part is whatever. College educated people overestimate how many people have degrees
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I'm sorry I tricked you into a relationship with me.

Lol

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emblem boy posted...

Ask her what her future plans and goals are. It's not weird to be wary of getting into a long term relationship with someone who's future plans you're so unsure of.

Like, ya, I get that some people might not have big career or financial goals, but does she have any other things that she's got going on, like hobbies?

That's just it, she doesn't seem into much of anything productive.

Watches stuff, listens to music, doesn't drive, walks/hikes

She's made comments about and OF (which doesn't bug me at all) but also mentioning she hasn't updated/promoted it in a long time.


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And yea, as for the getting weird stuff, she mentions feeling insecure when I mention I can't hang out/stay over at her place.

The thing that spurred this topic was when we hung out on Friday she suggested I stay over Saturday night, I mentioned I had to work that day since we had a particular client at work and had made plans with some friends later in the evening but would let her know how things were going. She said that's not a problem.

I messaged her around 8ish last night to say that I probably wouldn't be able to make it. She told me that it was all good and told me to have fun.

Then I get a message from her today saying "Hey. I realized it did bother me that you didn't come over last night."


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No job? Unemployed before quarantine? No ambition? She belongs to the streets.

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Doom_Art posted...

And yea, as for the getting weird stuff, she mentions feeling insecure when I mention I can't hang out/stay over at her place.

The thing that spurred this topic was when we hung out on Friday she suggested I stay over Saturday night, I mentioned I had to work that day since we had a particular client at work and had made plans with some friends later in the evening but would let her know how things were going. She said that's not a problem.

I messaged her around 8ish last night to say that I probably wouldn't be able to make it. She told me that it was all good and told me to have fun.

Then I get a message from her today saying "Hey. I realized it did bother me that you didn't come over last night."

There's been other situations where she's reacted similarly but this is the most severe so far.

• no work ethic
• no education/job prospects, nothing going on in her life
• weird clingy shit

get the hell out of there my dude, sneak out a window if you have to and RUN

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Make sure to not let her sabotage your condoms.

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Romulox28 posted...

get the hell out of there my dude, sneak out a window if you have to and RUN

yeah

typing it all out i was like "what the fuck am I doing here"

just rather disappointed because i did rather like her quite a bit prior to this and she seemed genuinely excited we were finally an item lol

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3PiesAndAFork posted...

Make sure to not let her sabotage your condoms.

>_>

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3PiesAndAFork posted...

Make sure to not let her sabotage your condoms.

Damn.

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Doom_Art posted...

I meant like college or university lol

Someone is high maintenance.

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Beyond01 posted...

Someone is high maintenance.

I'll never argue with you on that

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Doom_Art posted...

yeah

typing it all out i was like "what the fuck am I doing here"

just rather disappointed because i did rather like her quite a bit prior to this and she seemed genuinely excited we were finally an item lol

im sure she is a really cool & sweet girl but imo that is not enough for an adult relationship. sounds like she needs to do a lot of work on herself now and if she isnt taking any steps to improve, basically you're catching her on what is bound to be a gradual decline. ofc telling you to gtfo is easy but actually doing that is hard, im just warning you that i get the vibe she is going to become increasingly more and more reliant on you (financially, emotionally, etc) and it will be a drain

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So does she live with her parents or something? Cuz then how is she paying rent? Not saying living with parents is a bad thing

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Romulox28 posted...

im sure she is a really cool & sweet girl but imo that is not enough for an adult relationship. sounds like she needs to do a lot of work on herself now and if she isnt taking any steps to improve, basically you're catching her on what is bound to be a gradual decline. ofc telling you to gtfo is easy but actually doing that is hard, im just warning you that i get the vibe she is going to become increasingly more and more reliant on you (financially, emotionally, etc) and it will be a drain

This.

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Get rid of the trash, TC. I can say that because I'm trash myself. She's going nowhere and will drag you with her so long as you're with her, the clinginess tells me she's got Zero social skills or friends or a social life at all that doesn't involve you.

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Unless you are trying to save her because you like each other, GTFO. This girl has no ambition and sticking to someone like that can be toxic. Since this is bothering you, speak your mind and tell her.

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How are her boobs tho?

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Post a pic

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So that's over lol

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What happened?
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emblem boy posted...

What happened?

Responded to her (rather harshly, as a friend pointed out)

I just said that we had talked about it last night and the night before, that this wasn't the first time she's reacted this way, and that I felt as though I had to walk on eggshells or stress out whenever I couldn't hang out with her.

We went back and forth and decided to step back and cool off.

I will not be stepping back in.

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>global recession

might be why she's not working

Other peoples problems arent your problems bro.
decide between is it worth the investment or is it.

just be careful.

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How old was she?

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Doom_Art posted...

I meant like college or university lol

This really isn't a big deal then. I thought you meant she dropped out of high school or something lol.

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