Board 8 > I divorced my wife, ask me anything!

(+) Yeah! (+)

The best things in life are most certainly not free.
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You enjoying Bachelor life by getting drunk or crying in the night to "All by Myself?"
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How are you holding up? I'm sorry to hear that. I can't imagine there's many more things in life more difficult to go through.

Any advice for those of us about to get married that isn't "don't"?
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im sorry stuart "stu" "sbell" bell

if you need anyone to make fun of, you can go for it...you know, give it a shot see if you got that same old sbell magic, but i genuinely doubt you do.
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Who gets the Winry
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Hardcore_Adult posted...

You enjoying Bachelor life by getting drunk or crying in the night to "All by Myself?"

I enjoyed Bachelor life for a short period of time, there was no crying into the night, I made the divorce decision.

starcow posted...

How are you holding up? I'm sorry to hear that. I can't imagine there's many more things in life more difficult to go through.

I divorced her, it was sad to realize that this is what things came to, but other than that it was nothing but joy. It was not a happy marriage... that lasted 10 years.

ZaziGuado posted...

Any advice for those of us about to get married that isn't "don't"?

No, I say DO, DO get married. If you love someone and they love you and you know you only want to be with them then make the jump. I got married way too young, i was 23 and stupid. She decided that after 4 years of dating this is what we are supposed to do and it was one bad decision after the other.
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greengravy294 posted...

im sorry stuart "stu" "sbell" bell

if you need anyone to make fun of, you can go for it...you know, give it a shot see if you got that same old sbell magic, but i genuinely doubt you do.

your fascination with my name is something i can always rely on.

Eddv posted...

Who gets the Winry

Joint custody of the Winry and the Kairi.
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Obellisk posted...

She decided that after 4 years of dating this is what we are supposed to do

4 years of dating is plenty to make that decision for most couples. Did you cohabitate before tying the knot?

Also, how are Winry and Kai taking it?
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Whats a title officer btw, can you get me a good job
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So who cheated on who?
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you're in the elite crew of people that i refer to them as their real names that don't go by that (well kinda) online you should feel really proud
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__LeiaRolando__ posted...

Obellisk posted...

She decided that after 4 years of dating this is what we are supposed to do

4 years of dating is plenty to make that decision for most couples. Did you cohabitate before tying the knot?

Also, how are Winry and Kai taking it?

The official separation happened when both girls were still young enough to not really know what was what and we've never actually spoken about "divorce" with them. They know that there is Mommy's house and Daddy's House and thats just how life is. Winry is getting older and smarter and soon it will come up and then we'll deal with it. But other than that they are both amazing little girls and i wouldn't turn back the clock to eliminate the marriage because i can't imagine a life without them.
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Hey I recently got divorced too!

Its pretty terrible but some parts are ok sometimes
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I did this once. 10/10 would divorce her again. (Not my current wife though, were much better for each other than my young-and-stupid first marriage.)
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how many more years until we get wbell3826
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Eddv posted...

So who cheated on who?

Neither, however I am now involved with another.
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greengravy294 posted...

you're in the elite crew of people that i refer to them as their real names that don't go by that (well kinda) online you should feel really proud

greengravy294 posted...

you're in the elite crew of people that i refer to them as their real names

greengravy294 posted...

you're in the elite crew of people

greengravy294 posted...

elite crew of people

greengravy294 posted...

elite

Printing this and framing it on my wall

SantaRPidgey posted...

Hey I recently got divorced too!

Its pretty terrible but some parts are ok sometimes

The only terrible parts were the negotiating terms, other than that it was a delight knowing i'd be done.

JonThePenguin posted...

I did this once. 10/10 would divorce her again. (Not my current wife though, were much better for each other than my young-and-stupid first marriage.)

Apparently we are the same person.
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greengravy294 posted...

how many more years until we get wbell3826

not enough.
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I feel like most people get married after dating less than a year, including my terribly unhappy parents. Do you feel 4 years wasn't long enough?

Good idea - cross that bridge when they understand that something happened.

greengravy294 posted...

you're in the elite crew of people that i refer to them as their real names that don't go by that (well kinda) online you should feel really proud

I did this with Smurf back then and it drove him bananas. Meanwhile I've always gone by my first name around here xD
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starcow posted...

I feel like most people get married after dating less than a year, including my terribly unhappy parents. Do you feel 4 years wasn't long enough?

We started dating after highschool and we lived together for almost 2 years before i proposed (because she pretty much gave me a shit or get off the pot). at 23 i was still too young to make that type of life decision but not wanting to leave her I made the jump. I should have pushed back a bit. I feel 4 years was long enough but not for my maturity levels and frankly not for hers either.
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Obellisk posted...

Neither, however I am now involved with another.

Is she?
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Gravy's just trying to get my identity stolen.
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__LeiaRolando__ posted...

Obellisk posted...

Neither, however I am now involved with another.

Is she?

Not likely, i think Winry would have mentioned something by now, nothing escapes that little detective.

and the Ex is none to pleased with my being involved with someone since we live together. Kids love her though and she is amazing with them. I understand the exes distaste though, its another woman helping raise her daughters.
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Four years is PLENTY of time. Maturity is a different story. 23 y/o is fine for some, but not for others. Couples that get married after a year are just begging for a mess. It needs to be at least two - more unless you're absolutely certain and have lived together a while to test it out (but don't rush that decision because you're living together).

Obellisk posted...

and the Ex is none to pleased with my being involved with someone since we live together

I don't know if this is about the kids or that this happened so quickly tbqh - divorcing her and immediately having someone else move in is a pretty sick burn. It might make her feel that she was an expendable toy the entire time... (I'm not her, so I can't say for sure)
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Was there any particular reason you wanted a divorce, or was it just general unhappiness?
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__LeiaRolando__ posted...

Four years is PLENTY of time. Maturity is a different story. 23 y/o is fine for some, but not for others. Couples that get married after a year are just begging for a mess. It needs to be at least two - more unless you're absolutely certain and have lived together a while to test it out (but don't rush that decision because you're living together).

Obellisk posted...

and the Ex is none to pleased with my being involved with someone since we live together

I don't know if this is about the kids or that this happened so quickly tbqh - divorcing her and immediately having someone else move in is a pretty sick burn. It might make her feel that she was an expendable toy the entire time... (I'm not her, so I can't say for sure)

I brought up divorce December 2014.
We continued to live together for over a year since we had a lease and neither of us could afford the split.
We officially separated March 2016 (Her parents bought her a condo, how nice) and i moved in with my Dad and Step-Mom.
January 2017 I moved into a 2 family-house (at that time acquaintance's lease was about to be up so she moved in with me)

In order for her to have been an expendable toy there would have had to have been some play in the last 4-5 years. It was loveless, she would call me an asshole and not in that playful "Oh you're such an asshole" sort of way, she would say it and mean it! meanwhile I did EVERYTHING for her and never asked for anything, so it was hard to love, let alone even like a person like that anymore.
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Obellisk posted...

It was loveless, she would call me an asshole and not in that playful "Oh you're such an asshole" sort of way, she would say it and mean it! meanwhile I did EVERYTHING for her and never asked for anything, so it was hard to love, let alone even like a person like that anymore.

She sounds like a very unpleasant person. Did you ever find out why she felt that way about you?
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My ex officially filed papers today too (even though I signed everything 2+ months ago). We have been separated for years though and it was all amicable, we just never got around to actually filing papers

__LeiaRolando__ posted...

Obellisk posted...

It was loveless, she would call me an asshole and not in that playful "Oh you're such an asshole" sort of way, she would say it and mean it! meanwhile I did EVERYTHING for her and never asked for anything, so it was hard to love, let alone even like a person like that anymore.

She sounds like a very unpleasant person. Did you ever find out why she felt that way about you?

I didn't, because i no longer cared. After being with someone over 10+ years, you should be comfortable enough where you don't have to say please or thank you every time it would normally be deemed necessary and if you don't use a please it doesn't mean you are barking orders at the person. With her, i apparently was always yelling and barking orders, when all i was doing was asking her to get me paper towels cause there was poop all over the place from changing a diaper.

Also she had no drivers license and no matter how many times i asked her to remedy that since we now had kids and i was only 1 person and can't possibly do everything she refused. Big bone of contention.
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ShatteredElysium posted...

My ex officially filed papers today too (even though I signed everything 2+ months ago). We have been separated for years though and it was all amicable, we just never got around to actually filing papers

MAZEL TOV!
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Obellisk posted...

__LeiaRolando__ posted...

Obellisk posted...

It was loveless, she would call me an asshole and not in that playful "Oh you're such an asshole" sort of way, she would say it and mean it! meanwhile I did EVERYTHING for her and never asked for anything, so it was hard to love, let alone even like a person like that anymore.

She sounds like a very unpleasant person. Did you ever find out why she felt that way about you?

I didn't, because i no longer cared. After being with someone over 10+ years, you should be comfortable enough where you don't have to say please or thank you every time it would normally be deemed necessary and if you don't use a please it doesn't mean you are barking orders at the person. With her, i apparently was always yelling and barking orders, when all i was doing was asking her to get me paper towels cause there was poop all over the place from changing a diaper.

Also she had no drivers license and no matter how many times i asked her to remedy that since we now had kids and i was only 1 person and can't possibly do everything she refused. Big bone of contention.

Oof. I'm the only one in my house with a car + drivers license and it's such a miserable burden. I can only imagine how bad that is with children around. My condolences.

How did you end up splitting up shit? And was it amicable?

I basically just signed the house over to her and asked for half of savings and was done with it. Both agreed to it without lawyers or arguing and we moved on. I probably got the short end but the house we owned was next door to her mother and I couldn't be bothered getting her to buy me out. I was content to take the deal I offered with the knowledge she wouldn't try get alimony off me (which never came up in conversation but was a worry I had)

starcow posted...

Oof. I'm the only one in my house with a car + drivers license and it's such a miserable burden. I can only imagine how bad that is with children around. My condolences.

before we moved out of the house we bought (which was a bad bad decision purchased 1 month before the crash of '08 and immediately were $150k underwater) I would spend over 3 hours in the car every morning and every evening dropping her at her office and then driving to mine. And without fail she'd make me wait like 10 minutes every evening when i came to pick her up. it was slowly killing me inside.
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My friends got divorced last year and they get along better now than they ever did while they were married.
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ShatteredElysium posted...

How did you end up splitting up shit? And was it amicable?

I basically just signed the house over to her and asked for half of savings and was done with it. Both agreed to it without lawyers or arguing and we moved on. I probably got the short end but the house we owned was next door to her mother and I couldn't be bothered getting her to buy me out. I was content to take the deal I offered with the knowledge she wouldn't try get alimony off me (which never came up in conversation but was a worry I had)

We were renters at the time so that was easy, I gave her whatever she wanted as long as she agreed not to seek Alimony. We both had full time jobs and made roughly the same amount of money, there was no reason for it.

As far as kids went i never fought child support, the kids were all i cared about when it came to this. I proposed a schedule that was fair and balanced which gave us each 7 nights in a 2 week period, she fought back saying she couldn't live that way and how dare i take her kids from her. I agreed to give her 1 additional night (so my weekends ended sunday before dinner instead of Monday Morning) so i get 6 nights and she gets 8 every two weeks. She accused me of taking as much time with them as i did because it would lower my CS payments, i assured her that the CS payments were never a concern and that i love my children and want them to have a father in their life.

For her it was all about the money, for me it was abotu the kids and frankly if i had the money to afford a really good lawyer i would have been able to sue for full custody.
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Obellisk posted...

Eddv posted...

So who cheated on who?

Neither, however I am now involved with another.

So that's why you left eh
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starcow posted...

How are you holding up? I'm sorry to hear that. I can't imagine there's many more things in life more difficult to go through.

the day a marriage ends is never a bad day, dude. people in happy relationships don't get divorced.

congrats dude!
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Steiner posted...

starcow posted...

How are you holding up? I'm sorry to hear that. I can't imagine there's many more things in life more difficult to go through.

the day a marriage ends is never a bad day, dude. people in happy relationships don't get divorced.

congrats dude!

Well said, thanks Steiner.
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ShatteredElysium posted...

My ex officially filed papers today too (even though I signed everything 2+ months ago). We have been separated for years though and it was all amicable, we just never got around to actually filing papers

also i'm in this position. might do something about it this year
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DivorceFAQS = /
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Corrik posted...

DivorceFAQS = /

Not surprising
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I got divorced once. Glad there were no kids because joint custody sounds like a nightmare and now I never have to talk to her again
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KingButz posted...

I got divorced once. Glad there were no kids because joint custody sounds like a nightmare and now I never have to talk to her again

Yeah we get along, its civil, but ido have to deal with her on a semi regular basis.

Like now its back to school time so who is buying what for which kid etc.. Its like we're still married except i dont have to see her face every morning, i don't have to do things for her and I get to have sex.
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Two innocent lives ruined by soulless materialism. >_<
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Don't rise
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Steiner posted...

starcow posted...

How are you holding up? I'm sorry to hear that. I can't imagine there's many more things in life more difficult to go through.

the day a marriage ends is never a bad day, dude. people in happy relationships don't get divorced.

congrats dude!

I like this idea though I feel like I'd still feel some sadness or regret if it happened to me

But I'm not qualified to say either way what it's like, so
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Damn, B8 marriages are dropping like flies.
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