Board 8 > how do you help someone bring their self-esteem up?

(+) Yeah! (+)

like if someone you know is a really awesome person but they always talk down on themselves. how can you help convince them that theyre being too hard on themselves and theyre actually really great
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You set them up to be in a fight against two guys that you pay off to take a dive. And then you get the MC to back them up so they don't wuss out.
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give them lots of compliments but dont make it obvious

just slowly start giving them more and more specific verbal positive reinforcement. But it has to be genuine.
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Constant reassurance and occasional pointing out of in what ways they are awesome. You kind of have to corner them about it, people like that (of who I am one) are looking for ways to rationalize how much they suck. You gotta present them with undisputable evidence of how good they are so that they can't rationalize it away.
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HotDogButts posted...

give them lots of compliments but dont make it obvious

just slowly start giving them more and more specific verbal positive reinforcement. But it has to be genuine.

This is a good method.

Get them to do the things you think make them great, and schmooze.
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link them to vlado and ulti posts
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Suck their dick
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Go down on them
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Damn
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not much works, they just have to either grow out of it, be put in uncomfortable job situations or like find a girl or something.
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Compliment them to other people right in front of them. Like if they did something you admire, tell a mutual friend about it when you're all together. It works better since it's indirect so they're less likely to just ignore what you're saying and more likely to actually reflect on it and feel good about it later.

Put them into a cage match for the WWE title against AJ Styles
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Slowly
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Celebrate achievements and fun moments with them.

Good day at work? Hell yeah, drink's on me. Birthday? Man, great, hope the world keeps you for another! Found twenty dollars? Yes, hey, listen, let's come up with the coolest thing you can do with twenty dollars -- something that'll make a great story to tell.
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Emeraldegg posted...

Constant reassurance and occasional pointing out of in what ways they are awesome. You kind of have to corner them about it, people like that (of who I am one) are looking for ways to rationalize how much they suck. You gotta present them with undisputable evidence of how good they are so that they can't rationalize it away.

I am also low self-esteem but this wouldn't work on me at all and I would get super annoyed and angry and prob avoid you. It's probably a case-by-case thing.

But in general I think you can make someone feel valued by like inviting them to things, asking them for help on specific things, bringing over other people to meet them like they are a celebrity or something, etc
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foolm0r0n posted...

Emeraldegg posted...

Constant reassurance and occasional pointing out of in what ways they are awesome. You kind of have to corner them about it, people like that (of who I am one) are looking for ways to rationalize how much they suck. You gotta present them with undisputable evidence of how good they are so that they can't rationalize it away.

I am also low self-esteem but this wouldn't work on me at all and I would get super annoyed and angry and prob avoid you. It's probably a case-by-case thing.

But in general I think you can make someone feel valued by like inviting them to things, asking them for help on specific things, bringing over other people to meet them like they are a celebrity or something, etc

Mmm, yeah, thinking about it some more I think I agree with you. Such an approach wouldn't work on everyone. Too quick to equate whats good for me with whats good for everyone.
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If they're anything like me then they hate direct praise, and even indirect praise that seems too obvious/forced. Like don't say "omg these cookies are so good" and then only take 1 bite. If you eat the whole damn plate, then whether you say anything or not, it's obvious that you liked them.

Very specific direct praise can be good too, in a way that enables a conversation and shows genuine interest in them. So instead of "I love your games" something like "I love how your games try to use accessible 1-touch controls, how are you able to come up with new ideas and deep mechanics with such a strong limitation?"
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