Lurker > Lopen

Exhausted today so probably none

Do wanna fire up the pace soon though as I don't really wanna bother with another month of wwe network to finish this off
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Just to be clear how the inequality actually relates to absolute quality, I can respect any rumble from 1994 up as being someone's favorite at this point. That's the line where the rumbles start to actually get very good I think.
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Haku just seemed scary, man. A real aura about the guy (why on earth was he given the king gimmick in the late 80s I'll never know). Like even without hearing the stories I would've bought it. Some might say he's bad at selling offense, but to hell with those people. That's a guy that had no selling down to an artform and I wouldn't have it any other way-- I'm sure even if someone legit tried to beat the hell out of him he just wouldn't care.
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I had a lot to yap about and am hard lining these writeups at one post but yeah that was pretty great. I feel like those two in general had good camerawork with focus on Rock reaction shots. Austin and Vince too.
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Oh and if you want my thoughts on Rikishi, I actually liked the idea of him as a main eventer. The music was good, the attitude was good, even the absurd car storyline "I DID IT FOR DA PEOPLE. I DID IT. FOR DA ROCK." I liked more than I should have.

However, it was clear they were never going to take it very seriously, particularly with this show. Oh and most importantly, he desperately needed different pants. Should've just had a wrestling attire version of his entrance gear.
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Royal Rumble 2001:

Coming into this, the hype video was like... hey, here are these big bad dudes. Stone Cold, Kane, Undertaker, The Rock, and RIKISHI (who has 30 rigged). Now just seeing this hype video focus on more than two guys made me realize this was probably going to be better than the previous 3 crapfests.

The strong point of this Royal Rumble was probably the pacing. I feel like there were no real dead moments at all. You started with Matt and Jeff at #1 and #3. They take out #2 and #4, but they're dumber than the Steiners so they end up eliminating each other as Drew Carey (so silly) remains in the ring. Kane comes out, Carey stalls and tries to buy him off, but Kane is having none of this and tries to chokeslam him-- but Raven comes out with the next number and attacks. Carey eliminates himself and Raven turns the match into a hardcore match, but unlike 1998 it was done in an entertaining fashion. Hardcore friendly midcarders come out with the next few numbers and it's a fun time. Eventually Kane is tired of this crap, tosses everyone out, Honky Tonk Man randomly shows up to do a song and dance thing while Kane is like "what is this."

I didn't really mean to give a play by play early, but the point is that even in the relatively dead spots by star power, the Rumble was always doing things. At that point Rock came in, and well, the two of em last a really long time which helps out. All the other big hitters are relatively well spaced out, and they all last for a long time-- oh and Big Show makes a return here which is pretty hype. Well, for the 10 seconds he's in-- he chokeslams everyone but The Rock, and then The Rock kicks him in the nuts and tosses him.

So yeah anyway as you'd expect from the hype video, the final four were Austin, Rock, Kane,and The One Billy Gunn. Oh. Well Austin wins. Was pulling for Kane (or RIKISHI) but I'm okay with this Austin win I suppose.

Now all that being said, there were some fairly significant flaws too. Mostly a lack of really hype moments-- what made it worse is there were moments I STARTED to get hyped for, but they were blown. The Big Show was tossed out pretty unceremoniously which I wasn't big on, for one. However, by far the biggest one for me was this: Taker's number comes up. It's Kane about to be eliminated by a bunch of dudes teaming on him-- well, Taker ain't having this, as he an Kane are in one of their phases where they're allies. So he bails Kane out, and the two of em clear the ring (cept Rock who is still dead from Big Show attacking him). These guys aren't dummies like the Hardyz, and they just stand there dominant in the ring like two badass monoliths. So you know, Scotty 2 Hotty comes out, he gets wrecked, they wait for the next number... it's STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN with Rock recovering. Oh man this fight is gonna be good-- nope Triple H attacks him from behind and just beats Austin down for a while. Triple H ruins everything.

Also most of the non-threats I got hype for (Regal, Tazz, Haku, Rikishi) were tossed pretty quick. You may notice I said Rikishi, despite him getting all the hype. Well, Rock made him look like a clown by tossing him out pretty quick-- I feel like I said this before. He did thrust kick Taker right out of the ring at least.

This Rumble was pretty enjoyable, but not quite on the top tier for me. I blame the obnoxious RTC music.

Royal Rumble Ranking:
1992 > 1997 > 1990 > 2001 > 1994 > 1996 > 1989 > 1988 > 1993 > 1991 > 1995 > 1998 > 2000 > 1999

Random note Undertaker came out to some LIMP BIZKIT ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN. I thought for sure this would be dubbed over. No big thoughts on the undercard-- ladder match was the standout which I gave its own thing. You had pretty standard matches between Angle and HHH and E&C + The Dudleyz.
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Watching Royal Rumble 2001 right now.

Don't usually do this and split the show up into multiple parts but man the ladder match between Chris Jericho and Chris Benoit was pretty disappointing. I expected this or remembered this as awesome (pretty sure I've seen this), but you could tell these two guys were just like, excited to use a ladder. Very contrived stuff with it-- like that Walls of Jericho on the top of the ladder was cool but right after it happened I was like "how did this even happen?" -Didn't really feel the drama escalate till the very end.

I looked up Meltzer's rating just now-- 4.75 stars. Huh? I realize I'm kinda weird with ladder matches (generally you can measure how much I like a ladder match by taking the inverse of how many times the ladder is propped up in the corner) but what? I don't get it. Maybe this was better before I'd been desensitized to ladder spots.

I'd probably have given it like a 3 or 3.5. Part of me thinks Benoit vs Jericho is like auto 3.5* floor for wrestling analysts back then.
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Finn Balor/????
Austin Aries
Run and Gun (Mark Henry and Alex Riley)
#1 Contender: Chris Jericho
BONUS (2) Who is teaming with Finn Balor? The Boogeyman
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Maybe I've been desensitized to Mae Young and this was one of the worst things Mae Young had done at this point but I mean, yeah, awful segment gonna be awful.
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I expected that segment to be bad! Prefer to keep the negativity for stuff that goes above and beyond.

Man this attitude era though.
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Ax and Smash fighting each other seems kinda in character I think, so I didn't mind that as much either
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Definitely always been a peeve of mine too. The Steiners and LoD were about the only ones that haven't turned on each other so far of established teams.
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Royal Rumble 2000:

This Rumble was kind of a hybrid of 1999 and 1998. It had shades of the overly gimmickyness of 1999 (Russo was in WCW at this point so we can't even blame him for this one) and it had (half, I guess? you could argue Big Show had a chance) of the utter predictability of 1998.

The 1999 aspect was captured in Kai En Tai and the Mean Street Posse repeatedly coming in to interfere cause they were upset at being snubbed from the rumble. They interfere ike... 10 times. This horse died after one run-in from each (why would they run in again after the first one anyway-- they were thrown out of the ring each run-in so in theory they lost the Rumble even if they were in) and 10 may not be an exaggeration. Taka got a concussion or something in one of the run-ins. Oh and King is a racist and repeatedly calls Kai En Tai Chinese. You've also got all kinds of little gimmicks throughout in the most rigged seeming numbers in Royal Rumble history. This leads to things like the infamous Too Cool spot where the only 3 in the ring are them and they do a dance, and then Rikishi tosses em out. I'd rather the three had dominated the Rumble for a while but I guess that would've been weird.

The 1998 aspect, coming into this Rumble, the story was rar Rock and Big Show are angry at each other. Well there are like, all midcarders until number 20 or so-- I think the only thing that got me at all hyped was Chris Jericho and Chyna but they're out quickly after causing each other to get eliminated. Meanwhile, throughout the Rumble, you have King who is entirely hyped about The Rock, for some reason, saying "hehe when's Rock coming in!?" through the rumble until Rock finally comes in at about 25 or something. The final 4 are of course Kane, Rock, Big Show, and X-Pac. X-Pac does the Stone Cold thing where he sneaks in after being eliminated-- he's promptly eliminated again. Rock wins over Big Show after Kane proves totally irrelevant.

Best thing about this Rumble was Road Dogg's strategy of just sitting in the corner and holding onto the bottom rope. Road Dogg was robbed. Should've won this.

Mixing two wrongs doesn't make a right, it turns out.

Royal Rumble Ranking:
1992 > 1997 > 1990 > 1994 > 1996 > 1989 > 1988 > 1993 > 1991 > 1995 > 1998 > 2000 > 1999

Undercard was pretty bad. Triple H vs Cactus Jack encapsulates everything I hate about Triple H, as he tanks 85 barbed wire baseball bat shots, rips off the handcuff spot from last year, then wins with a pedigree (on tacks, granted, but this match should've been over 10 minutes before it was in Foley's favor). I probably liked the IC Title 3 way between Chyna Jericho and Hardcore Holly more than I should've. The Chyna/Jericho dual champion gimmick was cool-- didn't appreciate her much at the time but the more I think about it the more I think Chyna was underrated imo. There's just something about a woman fighting men and looking credible enough doing it that overcomes the fact that she wasn't a great wrestler or anything, for me.
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Will resume this tonight.

Super busy and had no sleep Wednesday. Yesterday I was too tired as a result of Wednesday.

I'm pretty spry today though
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ZeroSignal620 posted...

Matt Hardy (SD, October 2002)

I loved this feud.
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Benoit and Ishii are similar in that they both look like they hit really hard

I don't think just hitting hard = 'real' though. The spirit is what makes Ishii Bret Hart like not the moveset imo, which isn't really something Benoit ever did particularly well. Benoit was just like, always full speed all the time and any attempts to show charisma were definitely forced.
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Jakyl25 posted...

This is going to be a weird freaking comparison but I feel the same way about Tomohiro Ishii

Actually this may surprise you but it isn't weird to me at all

Ishii is my favorite NJPW guy and while i can't exactly claim to be as versed in his career as Bret that aspect definitely plays in His matches have a ton of passion in them and definitely come off as very real in the same sense Bret's do.

Anyway had a really busy day today so took a break-- 2000 tomorrow.
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ExThaNemesis posted...

also you guys love Bret Hart a really odd amount. I like him and all and he's a great wrestler but his character is so lacking compared to the real top guys like Austin, HBK, and the Rock.

Triple post to talk about this a bit since I missed it.

The reason I really really like Bret Hart is that he feels so real compared to other wrestlers. Like with him the whole "sports entertainment" thing is not really an issue. This reflects in both his promos and his wrestling style. He just comes off as very believable, no matter how ridiculous the situation is. I never felt anything from Bret was some canned dialogue that he didn't personally believe no matter his alignment or the storyline he's in.

Even his wrestling is very good in that way. Like, that match with Diesel on Royal Rumble 1995-- Bret kinda dominates the whole match more or less. Never once did I say to myself "you know, Diesel is like a foot taller than him and 150 lbs heavier there's no WAY he could be pushed around by Bret Hart like this--" you bet your ass with any of those three guys I would if the match was that one sided cause their moveset just wouldn't match the opponent in the way where keeping him on the ropes that long would work.

He's just very unique in that way. He never felt like he was "cutting a promo" or "working a match" he felt like a wrestler. I can't really say that's the case with any other main event level wrestler ever except maybe Randy Savage (which is weird to say cause of how off the wall he is, but if you just assume he's a crazy person it's all very internally consistent if we discard the time in the Macho King gimmick). I don't think I would even be a fan of wrestling if not for him.

Put it another way-- name a wrestler that you can say feels like a 100% consistent character between being a face and a heel, yet still manages to be good at both. Bret's really the only one that I feel you can claim this for.
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I mean I guess Rock could've done some punches to try and knock him down but at the same time if you're doing that as a finish I feel like a punch being the thing that puts him down half defeats the point. Maybe throw some chairs to the back in there? I dunno.

Like I don't doubt the planned finish was less chairshots but I think Foley staying up forced Rock's hand to an extent. Now that could be "Foley is out on his feet and forgot to fall down" which isn't really either guy's fault (well, it's the fault of whoever came up with the idea, which was probably Foley) or it could be "Foley is caught up in the moment and wants more chairshots" but point is either one isn't really on Rock.
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I don't entirely believe Foley on that. Like he probably doesn't remember the incident very well cause he got bludgeoned so damn much and Rock probably doesn't get too caught up on the details and just says "yeah my bad" cause well he probably feels terrible about it but the problem with assuming Rock just got carried away is that for the finish to work Foley needs to be face down and it's not like Rock hit Foley on the ground. Foley was walking around till the last chair shot.

Granted he may have very well been out on his feet and just not been falling down cause he didn't know any better but yeah I don't know if Rock is all that much at fault there.
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On the one hand that is true

On the other hand I don't think that does enough justice which is why I had to give the summary of the match. Like yeah that's a grim set of entrants, but we've seen as bad in 1993, 1995, and probably a couple of others are close.

It's just an amazing rumble in so many ways. It's kinda amazing to me that Meltzer gave this one 1.5 stars and Rumble 1993 DUD.
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That was mostly the Rumble I was thinking about when I said to TUM "I don't remember these Attitude Era Rumbles fondly aside from 1997"

1998 being as bad as it was on a rewatch was more of a pleasant surprise(???) than anything-- did not remember it being that bad. That being said 1999 is on a tier of its own, and was also worse than I remembered it, somehow (mostly because I didn't remember how full of crap it was that WASN'T Austin vs McMahon)
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Royal Rumble 1999

Coming into this Rumble, Austin has a $100,000 bounty on him, and McMahon has forced him into the #1 slot. Commissioner Shawn Michaels forced Vince McMahon into the #2 slot somehow.

I think a walkthrough of the events of this Rumble will say everything there is to be said about this match.

Match starts, Austin kicks the crap out of McMahon. He considers throwing him out, but wants to beat on him more. Golga is #3 and distracts Austin long enough for Vince McMahon to roll out of the ring. Austin tosses him out, but Vince runs the hell away while doing it. Austin pursues him. They brawl around backstage, and Vince leads him into an ambush in the women's bathroom as the Corporation beats the crap out of Austin. Austin is left laying. He's stretchered out to the ambulance, and we watch him get driven out of the arena.

At this point, we're up through #8. You'll note I haven't talked about anything in the ring since #3. This is not me omitting details-- just repeating what was on screen, more or less-- I guess we technically did show Gillberg get eliminated and some flashes of action in between this backstage stuff.

Anyway, so we finally get back to the ring. A few guys have built up. A recently returned Mabel comes out at #11, and clears the ring of literally everyone. *GONG* The lights go out, Mabel's now on the floor, being assaulted by the Ministry of Darkness, apparently having been thrown over the top in the darkness. Undertaker says some inaudible stuff to him, and he's drug to the back.

Road Dogg sits in an empty ring. After Dogg eliminated Gangrel instantly, we're treated to Road Dogg vs Kurrgan for a while. Some more guys build up, we cut to BACKSTAGE again to see Mabel getting put in a hearse or something. We come back to the ring, KANE is the next entry, at #18. Kane eliminates everyone in the ring, then white coats come out to take him to a mental asylum. Kane beats down some white coats. Kane steps over the top rope and eliminates himself, resetting the match for a third time.

Some more dudes come out, Vince McMahon returns to do commentary, and Austin drives an ambulance to the arena and returns. Aside from some Austin chasing McMahon around, there's a decent chunk at this point that is actually something resembling a normal rumble, but the damage has kinda been done at this point. Who could possibly care. Oh and Austin does not sell his stretcher job at all, wrestling this match completely normally.

After no selling the Lo Down to eliminate D-Lo and Bossman, last two are Austin and McMahon. WIRE 2 WIRE. Austin beats McMahon down some more. The Rock comes out and taunts Austin. Vince eliminates Austin. Vince McMahon wins.

Yeah. This rumble is s***.

Royal Rumble Ranking:
1992 > 1997 > 1990 > 1994 > 1996 > 1989 > 1988 > 1993 > 1991 > 1995 > 1998 > 1999

Undercard had the infamous Mankind/Rock match that let Foley permanently hear sea shells near the sea shore for the rest of his life. At least the match was good for most of it and not just a throwaway, but I really think the part that actually messed Foley up was the worst part, and kinda just uncomfortable to watch-- like ignoring that I knew the long term effects and they're unprotected chairshots, getting beaten mercilessly for 5 minutes while handcuffed is just not good. Don't see why they thought this would be a good idea.
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Random note, one thing I do vaguely want to do is rewatch just the Rumble in 1988 though seeing how this ranking is turning out

I feel like I probably gave it far too many points for being shorter-- like internally 1989 was always the one I was comparing to and 1988 was completely forgettable, so I probably am overrating it. I mean I kinda eviscerated 1995 and technically that was shorter than 1988. Just seems like it's probably too high. A lot of people say 1989 is a mess too but I stand by that one being about where it should be, but 1988, yeah.
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Well I mean even compared to WWE's Royal Rumbles of the past 10 years these undercards generally suck. I'm not generally the "it was good for its time" type!
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What possibly went wrong with exposing me to 90s Joshi beyond me ragging on The Glamour Girls for longer than I normally would've.
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Hey man that was the most legitimate looking bear hug ever. It wouldn't be such a joke if dudes ragdolled like Lesnar did
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Hulk Hogan (not Hollywood) tapped to Kurt Angle

Angle is just that good
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I think the Bret/Shawn Ironman match is almost underrated nowadays.

Like everyone thinks that because Ironman matches logically suck if booked incorrectly and have sucked for a long time due to being booked incorrectly, that there isn't and has never been any merit to having them.

In theory there are actually a lot of stories to tell-- Shawn/Bret put a ton of focus on the stamina required to wrestle a match for 60 minutes in the build and in the match, which was actually kinda cool and basically put both guys over pretty big regardless of the fall. I also like Brock vs Angle, where Brock beat the crap out of Angle with a chair and forfeited a fall to get an early advantage.

I will say that the fact that 30 minute Ironman matches even exist is proof enough that no one knows how to book Ironman matches anymore.
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Yeah I've rooted for Bret for his entire career. I was generally okay with the guys he feuded with though. Didn't like King Lawler or Owen at the time (I have appreciation for them now though). Shawn took a while for it to really build but I sorta disliked him-- this actually hasn't changed in the context of 1990s HBK-- felt his characters (even as a face) were kinda obnoxious. If Shawn retired in 1998 I may have never warmed up to him even though his matches were good. Mr Perfect was one of his early major feuds and he remained one of my favorites through his entire career.

But yeah if you pay any attention to me you know well enough that I root for heels pretty frequently so sticking with him through a heel turn isn't weird for me in the least. In fact it should come as no surprise to you to know that heel Bret is my favorite Bret.
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It's understandable he only existed in a relevant capacity for a few months. He only sticks out to me because he was prominent when I started watching Raw on a weekly basis.
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Yeah I dunno I just liked both sides in that. Like I appreciated the beauty of the blood feud.

The guy I did hate that feuded with Bret Hart for a time was The Patriot. God that guy bugged me.

Also Shawn to a lesser extent-- particularly after the stupid finish to the Ironman Match.
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Ha yeah. Dude had plans beyond plans. Hit em with knucks, plant em in the other dudes trunks in case it doesn't work and whine to the ref if you need to. Kinda dumb that the ref actually listened to him and flipped it as I feel like 9 times out of 10 they wouldn't, but it was a cool plot.

Also was a bump on the casket what ruined his back or what. I did notice a nasty one there!
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I really liked 1996-1997 Austin. His feud with Bret was amazing.

1998 Austin sorta flips between good and overexposed. This is Rumble is one of the best representations of the latter you'll ever see. Honestly if you play the Rumble out the same but remove the HE'S A MARKED MAN hype it's probably pretty middle of the road-- I'd imagine slightly better or worse than 1993 as the Rumble felt similar to that in a lot of ways (mostly the extended dead period of entrants with some more interesting spots at the ends), but it was really grating.
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Royal Rumble 1998

I'll start with the positives from this thing: 4 Boricuas hitting the ring at once, D-Lo randomly picking fights with nation members for no reason, and Mick Foley cheesing with 3 entries (this would've been hilarious if Dude Love won), and The Rock in general.

Now that I've got that out of the way, let's talk about this match. I could go on about minor things that annoyed me about this, like it beginning as a hardcore match in the dumbest opener to a Rumble ever, or that Vader was in for like 5 seconds off #30, or that Owen Hart can never actually enter a Rumble without getting attacked.

Or I could go with things that aren't exactly unique to this royal rumble, that the ring kept getting overcrowded, or that there wasn't much in the way of wrestling moves mostly just people punching each other all over (which in terms of time killing techniques in a Rumble, is better than just lying there, but worse than tying up in the ropes and trying to throw the dude over), or that there were so many low leverage entries-- the first 20 entries were a total snoozefest more or less (while not quite the jobbers of 1995 since these guys were actually on RAW, hog farmers, headbangers, and doa members are pretty whatever)

But let's just really cut to the chase and explain why this Rumble really sucked. The whole storyline of this thing was AUSTIN HAS A TARGET ON HIS BACK!!! We even had several backstage segments with guys trying to take him out before the match. The announcers will not shut up about Austin whatsoever for the entire match, and the guy doesn't get there till number 24, so you've got the first 23 numbers feeling like they mean even less as a result-- imagine if in Royal Rumble 1992 Flair came out at #24, but Heenan and Monsoon were talking about Flair as much as they did. It would be awful.

So 24 hits, marked man Austin's music hits. The whole ring waits for him. Austin throws Marc Mero out with a surprise attack-- some dudes punch him, then they disperse, and Austin is basically just another guy. This irritated me to no end. He was not a marked man whatsoever. Nation members are literally prioritizing fighting nation members over taking Austin out. I guess if you were really drinking the Austin kool aid this wouldn't bother you, but yeah this just felt like I got 2 hours of hype, much of which encroached on the earlier parts of this match, for no payoff.

Oh, and Austin wins. Yeah, sorry _SecretSquirrel_ but you're wrong. This one crushes every other Rumble in terms of predictability because the announcers and backstage segments were practically holding a neon "hey, Austin is going to win" sign.

On the plus side, Taker vs Michaels was good until the finish which was dumb, and Rock vs Shamrock was fun. Also Vader vs TAFKA Goldust had an awesome finish (TAFKA Goldust is the worst). No idea why minis got a match slot on PPV but they got more of a reaction than the random AAA guys at least. Battalion looked awesome.

Royal Rumble Ranking:
1992 > 1997 > 1990 > 1994 > 1996 > 1989 > 1988 > 1993 > 1991 > 1995 > 1998

I remembered not liking this one much, but it aged a good deal worse than I expected. Internally I expected it to fit in the 1989/1988 bracket but this felt like the grotesque hybrid of the worst aspects of 1995 and 1991.

Also no Kane in the rumble. Too busy trapping taker in a casket and setting it ablaze I guess. :(
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So far super predictable winners have been... 1990, 1991. 1994 kinda if you were metagaming the on PPV build, though the finish was weird and not one I'd imagine anyone predicting. 1995 given how weak the field was when you think about it kinda was too despite Michaels drawing #1.

I feel like it's more of a recent development more than a long term thing-- less depth on the rosters = less viable winners.
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Appreciate the spoiler tags-- there hasn't been a Rumble I didn't know the winner yet (1989 and 1996 I wasn't 100% on) but they will come. I know there are a few in the mid 00s where I won't actually know.

Just (re)watched HBK/Sid. It was fine but nothing great to me. Well I guess it was great compared to most matches on these, but yeah-- probably was a lot better in the moment though for the EMOTION behind the build or whatever.

I will say this though Sycho Sid's entrance is one of my favorites. The music and the SID pyro are so good.
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Not to spoil, but if memory serves that's the only attitude era rumble I'm particularly fond of

Kind of a big if though it's been quite a long time
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Absolutely I was referring to that dastardly Fuji. What with his schemes to... make Yoko look heavier than he is.
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Yes me too dammit

Just between you and me, I think they paid Crush to take a dive there
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And yeah I'm reasonably certain the main reason I don't like HBK more is because I was always behind the other guy in his earlier career feuds too.

Hell even his minifeud with Crush in 93 I wanted Crush to kick his ass. Then again I like Crush more than like, probably any longtime wrestling fan does.
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Yeah. This happened in 1994 as well despite that feud being over (I assume) at that point. Kinda makes me sad Jannetty was the Jannetty-- always liked that dude.

As for HBK/Sid I actually forgot to watch that cause it was on after and I finished the Rumble late-- whoops! I'll watch it later today when I continue these.
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I was highly amused that Rock went straight to attack Austin when he showed up. Destiny man.
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Yeah.

It is funny how similar it was to Raw's Cruiserweight division though.
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That much I actually knew.

Fake Diesel was robbed though. Should've been a 5 way.

I guess technically Bret elim'd him though so I see why he was robbed.
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Wanted to sleep that rumble off before continuing.

Royal Rumble 1997:

Man so many cheesy promo videos in this PPV. Think they technically started last year but they were much more prolific here.

Anyway, onto the Rumble. This match starts off ugly, with Nation Member Crush (he's always Crush but this guy's gimmick changes as much as Kane's) vs Ahmed Johnson into Fake Razor Ramon into a hog farmer. Luckily Stone Cold Steve Austin is #5, gets rid of the guys in the ring before #6 hits, and the real rumble begins.

After tossing out Bart Gunn pretty easily, an old friend of his who was fond of bible verses comes out, Jake the Snake Roberts! Poor Damien can't even get out (I suspect he was not actually in the bag here) as Austin beats the hell out of Jake and gets rid of him before the next guy.

This continues as Austin overcomes more guys who hate him-- most lasting more than a number unlike Jake but you know. British Bulldog, Owen Hart, even Savio Vega show up at just the right times-- this all culminates just before #21, when the field eliminates each other and Austin is again left alone. He collapses in the middle of the ring, exhausted, but waves the next guy in from the floor. The buzzer sounds, and it's BRET HART. Austin gets some energy back and the two furiously battle each other

Shortly after this leads to the first comedy spot I actually found funny (unless you find Mil Mascaras eliminating himself funny) in the Rumbles, when King's music hits and he enters at #22. "I told you McMahon! It takes a King..." he leaves to the ring, goes to attack his old nemesis Bret Hart-- Bret turns around, punches him, and knocks him right out of the ring in like 2 seconds. "... to know a King!" he finishes as he returns to the announce table. It's awesome.

Anyway so the Rumble proceeds, we're eventually left with Fake Diesel (yess), Bret Hart, Vader, Undertaker, and Austin. Bret clotheslines Austin over the ropes, then squares off with Diesel as Taker and Vader are fighting on the opposite side. The referees are tending to some sorta drama with Mankind on the side of the ring far from Austin, and a recovering Austin realizes the refs didn't see him hit the floor, so he slides back in, dumps Taker and Vader from behind, then Bret and DIesel. Stone Cold! Stone Cold! Wins! Bret is LIVID. What a travesty! The Tunney administration would've never allowed this to happen!

Undercard wasn't really anything worth talking about. I will note I'm really glad that WWE has learned from their errors with just haphazardly throwing random completely unbuilt AAA guys on PPV, as they had a 6 man all AAA match that was completely dead. Thank goodness our lightweight competitors of these days like TJ Perkins and Rich Swann don't have this issue on PPV, huh?

Royal Rumble Ranking:
1992 > 1997 > 1990 > 1994 > 1996 > 1989 > 1988 > 1993 > 1991 > 1995

Very good Rumble. It was similar to 1992 in a lot of ways, in that this was Austin's story, and was basically the Rumble to really start the ball rolling in establishing Stone Cold Steve Austin as a big deal. Even the Bret vs Austin spot was very reminiscent of the Piper vs Flair spot. In some ways I'd consider it better than 1997 in that I feel Austin gained more from this than Flair gained from 1992, which is a big deal, and the in ring action was a bit better. There are two big things that put 1992 over this: 1. There is no Bobby the Brain Heenan at ringside pulling for Austin. King sorta is cause he hates Bret but yeah, not nearly the passion. 2. While this wasn't a field of jobbers by any means, the star power of 1992 was still on a level above this-- also the AAA guys really drug it down they seemed so out of place.

(Kane was Yankem last year, Fake Diesel this year. I hope he enters as Kane in 1998 that would be fantastic.)
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No problem!
This is a cute and pop genocide of love!

Shelve it wins. Will probably rewatch too.

God this Rumble is annoying I'm having to switch to something else for all the highlight packages cause don't wanna potentially spoil myself (even though I've seen a lot of em)
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No problem!
This is a cute and pop genocide of love!

Yeah I've never been a huge HBK guy. I mean I don't dislike him or anything cause he's really good at what he does how could you, but pretty low on the totem pole for me relative to everyone else's love for him and vs other legends.

Anyway poll to readers who actually have a preference one way or another should I jump ahead to the 2017 write up and resume with 1997 after, or just shelve it till it's time.
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No problem!
This is a cute and pop genocide of love!

I'm just glad we had theme songs for his debut.
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No problem!
This is a cute and pop genocide of love!

You know I was hoping you or someone else would tell me that was the case. Well, I mean, not to say I was hoping for Taker's face to be broken but... compared to the alternative of thinking it's a good idea...
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No problem!
This is a cute and pop genocide of love!