Lurker > KogaSteelfang

This is extremely tempting, my cousin has hijacked my ps4 and I've been considering looking for a cheap used one for myself. Was also considering getting RDR2 as a gift for him at Christmas. Ugh, I just don't know if I want to drop $200 right now. >_<
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I thought it was ok. I'm not good at shooters and they're far from my favorite type of game, but it was fun. My cousin became deeply obsessed with it though, like he does with almost any game he likes. Now I'm so sick of hearing him talk about it or watching him play, I don't think I could enjoy it myself any more.
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NeonOctopus posted...

V-E-G-Y- posted...

KogaSteelfang posted...

It's worse too, my dad found out I liked her. So he couldn't have that, he started texting her a bunch of stuff, trying to get with her himself. By that point I had quit the job, but was shown in Facebook that she started dating some grungy looking guy who was way older than her too. She forwarded the texts to my mom, proving dad was trying to cheat again, cased a huge problem in my family. All because I was stupid enough to think I might have a shot with someone for once.

Lmao what

Dunno which part you guys are laughing at, but yeah. Once it was out that I liked her, dad started texting her a bunch of garbage. I don't know the details of what he sent, just that it was a bunch of dirty texts and him telling her she's hot. Maybe he was going to do that anyway, maybe he only did it to try and humiliate me more(something he's admitted he loves doing because it makes him feel powerful). I don't know, and it doesn't matter any more any way. I just wish I wasn't so stupid to ever admit to anyone that I'd like to have dated her.
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I can't tell the difference. It's not that I confuse politeness or anything for something else, but on the rare occasion someone is unusually nice it makes me think that maybe they do. Of course, I've been wrong every single time though. It happened twice at my last job.

First was a new employee that I'd see at shift change a couple times per week. At first everyone was polite and just made small talk. But then one night she expressed concern about a creep hanging around outside, so I walked her to her car. Every night afterwards I'd walk out with her just to be safe, only just outside the building though not to her car. Later on I hear people talking about much she appreciates me doing so. She becomes very friendly and says she's always excited to see me arrive, etc. At this point I'm not sure if there's actual interest, or if she's just being really nice. Turns out she was engaged, and in the early stages of pregnancy. So yeah, it wasn't anything about me, she just liked the added security of having a man walk her out.

Next girl was more confusing, because she had no reason to act this way. Again it's a co-worker I see at shift change. She's very attractive, and knows it, but doesn't let it change who she is. At first she's shy, just kind of greeting me and going back to doing whatever it was she was doing before. I don't push anything, because I'm shy too and behave the same way around new people. I'd just greet her and leave her in peace. Eventually though, she starts coming over and talking with me, I thought maybe she just had gotten comfortable around me, she talks about Pokemon, and anime, which seemed strange since she wouldn't talk about anything before. This was happening every night, she'd come over stay with me until she had to go, showing me drawings she made and asking about my day. Then one night her ride was late, and she stayed with me like 20 minutes alone with just us. I'm not 100% sure, but I think she might've been flirting with me. We talked and things went well, then when she left she leaned back in the door and shouted "Hey Dustin! Byeeeeeeeeeeeee!" she said it in such a playful way and giggled on her way out. That's when I went full crush mode, and my mind was racing trying to figure out if I had a shot. She was out of my league, but maybe she liked me anyway? I couldn't tell, is that just how girls act with a guy friend? Was she trying to make it blatant for me to ask her out? I had no idea and literally had a panic attack trying to figure it out that night, I didn't want to ruin a friendship, but I didn't want to miss a chance either...

Later some other co-workers were talking about the two of us. Apparently a lot of the other employees were wondering if there was something between us as well. One told me directly that I needed to to ask her out. They were all saying we'd make beautiful babies together. I messed up, I told them that I'd like to date her if she was interested. Apparently word got back to her, and she stopped all the talking. She went back to just basic greetings and ignoring me. Nothing else was said about it, no more friendly playful chats. I got my answer, that's just how is around guy friends, and by showing interest, I stopped being her friend I guess.

It's worse too, my dad found out I liked her. So he couldn't have that, he started texting her a bunch of stuff, trying to get with her himself. By that point I had quit the job, but was shown in Facebook that she started dating some grungy looking guy who was way older than her too. She forwarded the texts to my mom, proving dad was trying to cheat again, cased a huge problem in my family. All because I was stupid enough to think I might have a shot with someone for once.

I don't want to make that mistake again, but I'm afraid if anyone pays attention to me, or is unusually nice, that I'd fall for it all over again. I'm seriously that pathetic.
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They also never stopped the actual virus.
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Iirc 14. Gotten hundreds with methods like poke radar, sos, and fish chaining though. But the pure chance ones were good surprises. Lemme see if I can remember them all.

Wingull, Rhyhorn in safari zone that ran, Venomoth in safari zone that ran like 3 minutes after the Rhyhorn, Ponyta about an hour after the other two ran(yes, 3 random ones in one day), Ralts, Chatot, Nidorino, Chatot, Teddiursa... Now I'm having trouble remembering the rest, but I know it was more than 12, and I'm 95% certain it's at 14 total so far.
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...Zero.
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I don't think he'd ever be proud of me. Plus, the last time he found out I liked someone he started texting her trying to get with her himself. It backfired when she forwarded the messages to my mom, but yeah, instead of pride for his son he'd just try to ruin it any way he could.

deupd_u posted...

And then realize it's NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN.

This is true, and at this point is probably for the best. No one should end up being burdened with me.
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pegusus123456 posted...

DarkRoast posted...

AlisLandale posted...

How does leveling up work in this game? >_>

Exactly the same as any other Pokemon game, except replace random battles with catching. Catching gives the same kind of XP as random battles, though, so frankly the game isn't anywhere near as "different" to the main series as people think it is.

How does the PC work then if you're just filling it up with hundreds of copies of garbage?

You have access to the storage system from anywhere, so just send them to the professor which is this game's version of releasing them. You'll get rewarded for sending a bunch.
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Hour and a half left, followed by a 35ish minute drive home.
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I thought he went from 10 to 17, but I think I read somewhere that he actually starts off at 7. Im not sure which is official.
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Irregardless posted...

KogaSteelfang posted...

I lost pretty much every friend I ever had on here

Most of the people on here are shitheads

I'm the shithead in this situation.

SSJCAT posted...

with that attitude it seems like youre just bringing yourself down man.

i know its totally useless to tell someone whos depressed to cheer up, but i mean youve gotta do something to get out of that funk.

i hope you can get some help.

It's been this my entire life, no matter how I feel. It's always me that's the problem. Had like maybe 3 years here where I didn't totally feel like an outcast, and was starting to gain a bit of confidence. Then it was blown to hell, and I'm back at square one. It feels pointless to think it could ever change.

ArchNemo posted...

I'm also your friend :o

Thanks.
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_Lyonidias posted...

KogaSteelfang posted...

_Lyonidias posted...

KogaSteelfang posted...

Same as always, hating myself for being awful.

you arent awful tbh

I've been described as an emotional parasite, an irredeemable piece of shit, and toxic. Plus they're not wrong. I lost pretty much every friend I ever had on here, and I don't deserve any thing good or any kindness.

Ive lost every friend Ive had from here too. Just gotta move on to greener pastures.
Believe me, I know it hurts.

No where else to go. My real life sucks and I'm lonely. This place was the only place I ever felt I fit in, and I ruined it.
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_Lyonidias posted...

KogaSteelfang posted...

Same as always, hating myself for being awful.

you arent awful tbh

I've been described as an emotional parasite, an irredeemable piece of shit, and toxic. Plus they're not wrong. I lost pretty much every friend I ever had on here, and I don't deserve any thing good or any kindness.
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Same as always, hating myself for being awful.
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Yeah.
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I'm sorry. You did good though. Stay strong.
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Once when I was a kid, I think about 12 or so, I put on a dress just to be silly. I jumped out from around the corner to surprise my family, and the neighbors were over. >_>
First and last time lol.
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One of my teachers in high school got really into the idea of finding gifted students. She brought in a guy one day to do an official one apparently. I scored 132 on that one.

The only other ones I've taken we're online ones just for fun, and generally get somewhere around 120-140ish, but I don't really out much stock into this. Everyone is smart in different ways, some are clever, others perceptive, some intuitive and quick learning, others are book smart or have some innate understanding of certain things. I don't think there's a way to accurately measure intelligence with just some test.
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FLUFFYGERM posted...

KogaSteelfang posted...

I don't deserve a gf, and they all sense that. The best I could hope for is pity sex, but it turns out people generally have standards. So that's a no too.

aren't you attractive tho? i remember seeing your picture in the Picture General thread or w/e and you're not ugly

That's what people say, yeah. It hasn't helped me though.
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I don't deserve a gf, and they all sense that. The best I could hope for is pity sex, but it turns out people generally have standards. So that's a no too.
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Depressed, lonely, and tired.
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ChatWWE posted...

Why do you have these beliefs?

It's true. There's no reason someone should choose me over literally anybody else, and no one ever has. Like others have said in the past, why would anyone love me if I don't love myself, but the catch is I've learned I'm unlovable because no one does. I always thought finding someone who'd want to be with me would help fix me, that it'd boost my self esteem/self worth, confidence, and give hope. But apparently that mindset is incredibly selfish and wrong. So I'm basically completely lost on this front, with no signs of any of it ever changing.

The way I feel about myself, if I were worth being with, someone would have chosen to be with me.
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I'm sorry to gear that. *sends an e-hug*
Be sure to spend time with him if you can.
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Because I'm a huge failure, I'm not worth being with, and no one would want me anyway.
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Any.
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I always from forget this happens every November. I'm in the middle of nowhere with a great view of the sky, I hope I remember to check it out some later.
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No, have never had a girlfriend. It sucks, but it's clear now it's not meant to happen.
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Mostly. I do have a job, so at least I contribute a little.
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Haha, no.
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I will indeed.
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Might as well go for it myself. Put me in, boss.
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6'
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35.
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LeetCheet posted...

Zero and I'm 27.
I feel like a loser : /

This, except I'm 35.
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I don't think they count but possibly 2.

First was when I was about 13 or so. A kid from my class came running up to me and asked for my phone number. I gave it and started receiving calls from a girl in my class. It took a day or two for me to hear people talk about how I was "dating" her. I asked her about it and she confirmed we were apparently dating, and I had no idea. All we talked about was homework and upcoming tests. My dad noticed I was getting calls from a girl and started making fun of me. The next time she called I was honest with her, that I didn't even know she was the one who wanted my number, or the reason, and that it surprised me that she thought we were together. Obviously that's the wrong thing to say, she became furious and hung up on me. I don't think we ever spoke after that.

Next would be that semi crazy woman from okcupid a few years back. The one who lived 15 minutes from me and wanted friends, but more if there was a connection. I thought a friend would be helpful, so we matched. She ended up showing my profile to a bunch of guys she knew until they identified me, told her where I lived and worked, and a bunch of other stuff. She also figured out my schedule just from talking with me, and randomly showed up at work one night. She gave me a hat she had knitted, and acted like she possibly wanted more. Then later while texting she told me off, that she'd never want to be with someone as inexperienced as I am. That I wasn't good enough to be with her. Then a few weeks later she flipped it again, after learning I want kids she starts discussing our marriage and telling me all these dreams she's had about me.
I'll be honest, I was strongly considering giving it a shot just to try and lose my v-card and potentially have a kid. I decided against it in the end.

I didn't agree to date in either case, or gone out with them. But I suppose they could technically count as relationships? I'm still gonna say 0 but those were the closest I've gotten.
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RedWhiteBlue posted...

Honestly I'm still on the lowest streak, it just never stops...

This seems like an accurate statement. Each period of my life has been awful, but some for different reasons than others.

Childhood- Physical and mental abuse from parents, and bullying from classmates. Very thoroughly ingrained it into my mind that I'm not worth anything to anybody, and never will be.

Age 9- Car accident and reality setting in. I was severely injured in the accident, had my intestines crushed and severed by the seatbelt catching my across the belly, it impacted my spine giving me back problems and nerve damage throughout my lower torso. I was left untreated by the hospitals and ended up with gangrene in my intestines. I was in excruciating pain constantly, couldn't eat, move, or sleep. I wanted to die just to end the pain. Finally an "exploratory surgery" was done just to check things out and I was rushed to emergency surgery immediately and had a bunch of my guts removed. Was told I wouldn't have survived another day without the surgery. Also learned that my dad was honest about wanting me dead, as he refused to sign the consent form and said to let me die. Luckily my mom signed and he became furious at both of us.

Teenage years- By this point I was a recluse. Never leaving my room, and when I did getting beaten/threatened by my dad for existing. Never being allowed to go out either because he didn't want anyone to see me. I was basically a prisoner. This made me withdraw further from any social contact, I became an outcast in school, and no one wanted anything to do with the kid who never talks. Bullying increased to direct harassment. Depression and anxiety ran rampant, suicidal tendencies developed.

Young adult years- Finally no more school, had some money from the settlement after the previously mentioned car accident. Things were looking up for a change, until I realized I was nothing but a bank account to my family. I had money, so they spent it. When I refused to give money, I'd get a loaded gun shoved in my face or months of mental abuse until I relented. It was easier to just give them what they wanted rather than resist and endure more torment. I ended up completely broke with nothing to show for it, and then more abuse for no longer having money.

Late 20's- Still a shut in, but I live with my brother without my parents. Have a job, and start trying to open up and make friends or a girlfriend. Each failure sends me back into a deep depression of feeling unwanted and worthless. I quit "trying" assuming I'll eventually meet someone and just click with them. Loneliness begins to set in quite heavily.

Early and mid 30's- I start posting on the social boards here on gamefaqs. For the first time in my life I feel like I fit in, people seem to like me, and am getting encouragement for the first in my life. It felt good, I began to open up about my life and let it out. People had compassion, and felt bad for my circumstances. I guess I made a habit of reaching out for help, because those positive things died out quickly. Whenever I'd hesitate to believe anyone actually cared, it'd turn people away. Whenever I was frustrated at myself, others would join in insulting me. Now there's basically no good will left towards me here any more. I've basically stopped posting after ruining the only friendships I've ever had. I guess I didn't realize just how truly awful of a person I am. I said some things out of frustration that I didn't even mean, and it cost me all the good I'd spent years building.

My whole life is a wash, there's nothing to show for any of it and no signs of any of it changing. If I could just stop existing I would. Feels pointless to hope for any happiness in my life. I'm nothing but a joke now to anyone that ever did care, so whatever.
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Yeah, started getting them at like 23 or so. Now at 35 there's a decent bit around the temple areas but still not too bad.
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Yeah, I've always wanted kids.
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gguirao posted...

I've never had sex

This, but...

I would never want to do it in public.

Not entirely this.
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Not even a little.
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I was a bit concerned, I'm glad you're ok!
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I beat it for the first time yesterday. For once I was very overpowered and just tanked the boss and out damaged him.
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MrNintendo1213 posted...

Nothing cause no dates ever.

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I'm working, so I'll just be stuck here for an extra hour
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Sure, if you don't mind.
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Coco hit pretty hard.
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joemodda posted...

Never. Feels bad man

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Ryetoast posted...

Cute either way .

Thanks, you're too kind.
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I didn't realize people were so bad until my current job at a hotel front desk. The various kinds of things I've seen people mess up/not understand is kind of jarring.

The worst one has to be the guy who checked in then called back down cussing at me. He was angry that his room didn't have a closet. I told him that it did have one, but he wouldn't listen. He eventually hung up on me after saying he'd talk to my manager the next day and file a complaint. Well the next day comes along and he shows up for breakfast. He finds me and is laughing, said I wouldn't believe what happened. Turns out he saw the closet, but didn't open it. He just assumed it wasn't one and got angry. After he hung up on me he checked it... Yeah dude, I told you every room has a closet. At least he had the decency to apologize though, but jeez.
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