Current Events > How do I tell my wife I hate the surprise week she's bought away for us?

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Jabodie 10/24/23 9:45:55 AM #51:	VeggetaX posted... You consider not owning your mistakes and bad decisions, acting like you've done nothing wrong even when you did know you did something wrong is healthy communication? She literally asked why he didn't complain afterward bro. --- <insert sig here> <cite>Jabodie posted [p:976832281] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>VeggetaX posted... </cite><quote>You consider not owning your mistakes and bad decisions, acting like you've done nothing wrong even when you did know you did something wrong is healthy communication?</quote>She literally asked why he didn't complain afterward bro. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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FolkenRawr 10/24/23 9:49:25 AM #53:	Jabodie posted... She literally asked why he didn't complain afterward bro. This. If you can't figure out the implication of healthy communication in that context, you probably aren't ready for a serious relationship. The scenario was dinner. Yes, sucking up a single shitty dinner is what I'd call healthy. --- Cookin like a chef, I'm a 5 Star Michelin <cite>FolkenRawr posted [p:976832331] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Jabodie posted... </cite><quote>She literally asked why he didn't complain afterward bro.</quote>This. If you can't figure out the implication of healthy communication in that context, you probably aren't ready for a serious relationship.The scenario was dinner. Yes, sucking up a single shitty dinner is what I'd call healthy. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
VeggetaX 10/24/23 9:50:52 AM #54:	Jabodie posted... She literally asked why he didn't complain afterward bro. She asked why he didn't complain, not that she understood she made a bad decision unless you think that's the same thing. --- Don't like it? Don't watch it. It's that simple Dictator of Nice Guys <cite>VeggetaX posted [p:976832356] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Jabodie posted... </cite><quote>She literally asked why he didn't complain afterward bro.</quote>She asked why he didn't complain, not that she understood she made a bad decision unless you think that's the same thing. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
FolkenRawr 10/24/23 9:52:48 AM #55:	VeggetaX posted... She asked why he didn't complain, not that she understood she made a bad decision unless you think that's the same thing. All of this is just picking a fight ontop of making someone that knows they fucked up feel even worse. Over a single dinner. --- Cookin like a chef, I'm a 5 Star Michelin <cite>FolkenRawr posted [p:976832381] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>VeggetaX posted... </cite><quote>She asked why he didn't complain, not that she understood she made a bad decision unless you think that's the same thing.</quote>All of this is just picking a fight ontop of making someone that knows they fucked up feel even worse. Over a single dinner. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Torgo 10/24/23 9:53:01 AM #56:	1) Try for both your sake and hers to have a positive outlook and make the most of it. 2) Once it's over, have a nice talk with her and use the fact that you "did it for her" as a way to enter into it to use a bit of guilt - since spending the time not complaining when you hated it was a sacrifice of sorts. Express to her that you appreciated her intentions, but in the future you would much rather pick your places to stay together. --- Moderated for telling people not to commit illegal acts of assault and murder.09/2/23 Also moderated for not responding to obvious bait. - 10/03/23 <cite>Torgo posted [p:976832385] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>1) Try for both your sake and hers to have a positive outlook and make the most of it. 2) Once it's over, have a nice talk with her and use the fact that you "did it for her" as a way to enter into it to use a bit of guilt - since spending the time not complaining when you hated it was a sacrifice of sorts. Express to her that you appreciated her intentions, but in the future you would much rather pick your places to stay together. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Jabodie 10/24/23 9:53:02 AM #57:	VeggetaX posted... She asked why he didn't complain, not that she understood she made a bad decision unless you think that's the same thing. If she was not aware it was bad, why would she ask why he didn't complain? What's your reading on what's going on in her mind from that statement? Genuinely curious. --- <insert sig here> <cite>Jabodie posted [p:976832386] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>VeggetaX posted... </cite><quote>She asked why he didn't complain, not that she understood she made a bad decision unless you think that's the same thing.</quote>If she was not aware it was bad, why would she ask why he didn't complain? What's your reading on what's going on in her mind from that statement? Genuinely curious. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
VeggetaX 10/24/23 9:58:51 AM #58:	FolkenRawr posted... All of this is just picking a fight ontop of making someone that knows they fucked up feel even worse. Over a single dinner. It's not picking a fight to let someone know you didn't like their decision. You just use good words and good context for it. There's a difference between "Your food sucked!" vs "Hey, thanks for dinner but I'll be honest with you it wasn't to my liking" but sure sometimes you should just suck it up, I get it. Jabodie posted... If she was not aware it was bad, why would she ask why he didn't complain? What's your reading on what's going on in her mind from that statement? Genuinely curious. Because there's a difference between "Why didn't you complain" vs "I know my food sucked and I'm sorry for it". There is no mind reading here which is why it's best to clarify what they mean by what they say. --- Don't like it? Don't watch it. It's that simple Dictator of Nice Guys <cite>VeggetaX posted [p:976832460] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>FolkenRawr posted... </cite><quote>All of this is just picking a fight ontop of making someone that knows they fucked up feel even worse. Over a single dinner.</quote>It's not picking a fight to let someone know you didn't like their decision. You just use good words and good context for it. There's a difference between "Your food sucked!" vs "Hey, thanks for dinner but I'll be honest with you it wasn't to my liking" but sure sometimes you should just suck it up, I get it.Jabodie posted... </cite><quote>If she was not aware it was bad, why would she ask why he didn't complain? What's your reading on what's going on in her mind from that statement? Genuinely curious.</quote>Because there's a difference between "Why didn't you complain" vs "I know my food sucked and I'm sorry for it". There is no mind reading here which is why it's best to clarify what they mean by what they say. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Jabodie 10/24/23 10:08:10 AM #59:	VeggetaX posted... Because there's a difference between "Why didn't you complain" vs "I know my food sucked and I'm sorry for it". There is no mind reading here which is why it's best to clarify what they mean by what they say. I see what happened here. The paragraph we are discussing, sentences in bold: One time my girlfriend made me supper and it was burnt and horrible. I ate it and didn't say a word. *She knew it was crappy and didn't need anyone to pile on. She asked why I didn't complain afterwords and I told her words do damage and she did something nice for me by cooking me dinner.* Sometimes you don't know how a persons day went and negative words can have horrible consequences in a relationship. She will love you all the more if you work through it without complaining. From the two sentences there, it is difficult for me to not to infer that there was a bigger conversation about the dinner (presumably she told him she knew it was crappy, otherwise how would the narrator know?). The question about companion was a set up to the moral of his story. I did not read that as his girlfriend's only takeaway - further communication is implied but its explicit detail was not needed to get the main point across. Edit: I can respect if you're a zero assumption / very literal reader for online discussions. I just found our different takeaways from the same text interesting. --- <insert sig here> <cite>Jabodie posted [p:976832599] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>VeggetaX posted... </cite><quote>Because there's a difference between "Why didn't you complain" vs "I know my food sucked and I'm sorry for it". There is no mind reading here which is why it's best to clarify what they mean by what they say.</quote>I see what happened here. The paragraph we are discussing, sentences in bold:One time my girlfriend made me supper and it was burnt and horrible. I ate it and didn't say a word. She knew it was crappy and didn't need anyone to pile on. She asked why I didn't complain afterwords and I told her words do damage and she did something nice for me by cooking me dinner. Sometimes you don't know how a persons day went and negative words can have horrible consequences in a relationship. She will love you all the more if you work through it without complaining.From the two sentences there, it is difficult for me to not to infer that there was a bigger conversation about the dinner (presumably she told him she knew it was crappy, otherwise how would the narrator know?). The question about companion was a set up to the moral of his story. I did not read that as his girlfriend's only takeaway - further communication is implied but its explicit detail was not needed to get the main point across. Edit: I can respect if you're a zero assumption / very literal reader for online discussions. I just found our different takeaways from the same text interesting. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Villain_S_Fiend 10/24/23 10:10:18 AM #60:	Torgo posted... use the fact that you "did it for her" as a way to enter into it to use a bit of guilt I think that's a bad idea. Guilt doesn't need to be introduced at all when diplomatically communicating your feelings has just as much chance of avoiding future goofs. I think it also implies a weirdly parental aspect to the relationship, where one partner doesn't believe the other can find their way to feeling guilty about something or considering someone else's perspective without being led there. --- The food here is terrible. My steak was so tough it attacked my coffee and the coffee was too weak to defend itself. <cite>Villain_S_Fiend posted [p:976832630] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Torgo posted... </cite><quote>use the fact that you "did it for her" as a way to enter into it to use a bit of guilt</quote>I think that's a bad idea. Guilt doesn't need to be introduced at all when diplomatically communicating your feelings has just as much chance of avoiding future goofs. I think it also implies a weirdly parental aspect to the relationship, where one partner doesn't believe the other can find their way to feeling guilty about something or considering someone else's perspective without being led there. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
FolkenRawr 10/24/23 10:14:54 AM #61:	Jabodie posted... I see what happened here. The paragraph we are discussing, sentences in bold: One time my girlfriend made me supper and it was burnt and horrible. I ate it and didn't say a word. *She knew it was crappy and didn't need anyone to pile on. She asked why I didn't complain afterwords and I told her words do damage and she did something nice for me by cooking me dinner.* Sometimes you don't know how a persons day went and negative words can have horrible consequences in a relationship. She will love you all the more if you work through it without complaining. From the two sentences there, it is difficult for me to not to infer that there was a bigger conversation about the dinner (presumably she told him she knew it was crappy, otherwise how would the narrator know?). The question about companion was a set up to the moral of his story. I did not read that as his girlfriend's only takeaway - further communication is implied but its explicit detail was not needed to get the main point across. Edit: I can respect if you're a zero assumption / very literal reader for online discussions. I just found our different takeaways from the same text interesting. This, by the way. I feel I'm coming off way more hostile than I actually feel or intend. --- Cookin like a chef, I'm a 5 Star Michelin <cite>FolkenRawr posted [p:976832682] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Jabodie posted... </cite><quote>I see what happened here. The paragraph we are discussing, sentences in bold:One time my girlfriend made me supper and it was burnt and horrible. I ate it and didn't say a word. She knew it was crappy and didn't need anyone to pile on. She asked why I didn't complain afterwords and I told her words do damage and she did something nice for me by cooking me dinner. Sometimes you don't know how a persons day went and negative words can have horrible consequences in a relationship. She will love you all the more if you work through it without complaining.From the two sentences there, it is difficult for me to not to infer that there was a bigger conversation about the dinner (presumably she told him she knew it was crappy, otherwise how would the narrator know?). The question about companion was a set up to the moral of his story. I did not read that as his girlfriend's only takeaway - further communication is implied but its explicit detail was not needed to get the main point across. Edit: I can respect if you're a zero assumption / very literal reader for online discussions. I just found our different takeaways from the same text interesting.</quote>This, by the way. I feel I'm coming off way more hostile than I actually feel or intend. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Compsognathus 10/24/23 10:16:07 AM #62:	The thing people need to realize about surprises is that they add very little overall enjoyment to something. Like someone could surprise you with a vacation that you absolutely had a blast on, but when you look at your overall enjoyment of the it, the fact that it was a surprise will be only the tiniest piece of it. It ultimately just didn't matter that it was a surprise. Knowing that surprises just aren't great for expensive or time consuming things. You are basically gambling that whatever marginal benefit is gained from the thing being a surprise is worth more than not getting their input on the thing to make sure it's actually enjoyable for them. And frankly that's a crazy gamble to make. If you miscalculate you end up with the thing being unenjoyable and the fact that it was a surprise is completely meaningless. Where surprises do work is little things. Then the benefit of the surprise is a higher overall proportion of the total enjoyment. And if you whiff it, oh well, not much time/money lost. What things should be surprises is a good conversation to have between a couple. --- 1 line break(s), 160 characters allowed <cite>Compsognathus posted [p:976832703] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>The thing people need to realize about surprises is that they add very little overall enjoyment to something.Like someone could surprise you with a vacation that you absolutely had a blast on, but when you look at your overall enjoyment of the it, the fact that it was a surprise will be only the tiniest piece of it. It ultimately just didn't matter that it was a surprise. Knowing that surprises just aren't great for expensive or time consuming things. You are basically gambling that whatever marginal benefit is gained from the thing being a surprise is worth more than not getting their input on the thing to make sure it's actually enjoyable for them. And frankly that's a crazy gamble to make. If you miscalculate you end up with the thing being unenjoyable and the fact that it was a surprise is completely meaningless.Where surprises do work is little things. Then the benefit of the surprise is a higher overall proportion of the total enjoyment. And if you whiff it, oh well, not much time/money lost.What things should be surprises is a good conversation to have between a couple. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
streamofthesky 10/24/23 10:26:10 AM #63:	Does your wife work? It's been my experience w/ everyone I know that stay at home wives don't appreciate/understand that if you work, when you have time off, you just want to fucking relax and not do anything (the proper term is "staycation"). I guess since they're home all the time, the idea of wanting to spend more time at home is alien to them? Other than trying to get a partial refund and go home early, not much you can do about this trip now. In the future...don't give her advance notice you're taking vacation. Tell her on like Thursday, "Oh, by the way, I had vacation time to use or lose, so I just took next week off" or whatever. If she wants to PLAN a trip, she can always discuss it w/ you and plan it in advance, but otherwise remove her ability to "surprise" you like this again. I really don't know why she even needs a months-long heads up about your vacation plans if she hasn't expressed any desire to take one. I use mine on a whim, not b/c of this situation, but just b/c I...don't care? If I have time to use and feel like it, I just request it off w/o much notice. <cite>streamofthesky posted [p:976832835] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Does your wife work?It's been my experience w/ everyone I know that stay at home wives don't appreciate/understand that if you work, when you have time off, you just want to fucking relax and not do anything (the proper term is "staycation"). I guess since they're home all the time, the idea of wanting to spend more time at home is alien to them?Other than trying to get a partial refund and go home early, not much you can do about this trip now.In the future...don't give her advance notice you're taking vacation. Tell her on like Thursday, "Oh, by the way, I had vacation time to use or lose, so I just took next week off" or whatever. If she wants to PLAN a trip, she can always discuss it w/ you and plan it in advance, but otherwise remove her ability to "surprise" you like this again.I really don't know why she even needs a months-long heads up about your vacation plans if she hasn't expressed any desire to take one. I use mine on a whim, not b/c of this situation, but just b/c I...don't care? If I have time to use and feel like it, I just request it off w/o much notice.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
AlCalavicci 10/24/23 10:27:47 AM #64:	tag --- Sent from my AI Chatbot <cite>AlCalavicci posted [p:976832857] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>tag </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
punkfanalways 10/24/23 10:57:26 AM #65:	streamofthesky posted... Does your wife work? It's been my experience w/ everyone I know that stay at home wives don't appreciate/understand that if you work, when you have time off, you just want to fucking relax and not do anything (the proper term is "staycation"). I guess since they're home all the time, the idea of wanting to spend more time at home is alien to them? Other than trying to get a partial refund and go home early, not much you can do about this trip now. In the future...don't give her advance notice you're taking vacation. Tell her on like Thursday, "Oh, by the way, I had vacation time to use or lose, so I just took next week off" or whatever. If she wants to PLAN a trip, she can always discuss it w/ you and plan it in advance, but otherwise remove her ability to "surprise" you like this again. I really don't know why she even needs a months-long heads up about your vacation plans if she hasn't expressed any desire to take one. I use mine on a whim, not b/c of this situation, but just b/c I...don't care? If I have time to use and feel like it, I just request it off w/o much notice. Well... she actually got in touch with my boss and booked it off for me. That kinda annoyed me in itself. Ill have a chat with her later and let everyone know how it goes. <cite>punkfanalways posted [p:976833299] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>streamofthesky posted... </cite><quote>Does your wife work?It's been my experience w/ everyone I know that stay at home wives don't appreciate/understand that if you work, when you have time off, you just want to fucking relax and not do anything (the proper term is "staycation"). I guess since they're home all the time, the idea of wanting to spend more time at home is alien to them?Other than trying to get a partial refund and go home early, not much you can do about this trip now.In the future...don't give her advance notice you're taking vacation. Tell her on like Thursday, "Oh, by the way, I had vacation time to use or lose, so I just took next week off" or whatever. If she wants to PLAN a trip, she can always discuss it w/ you and plan it in advance, but otherwise remove her ability to "surprise" you like this again.I really don't know why she even needs a months-long heads up about your vacation plans if she hasn't expressed any desire to take one. I use mine on a whim, not b/c of this situation, but just b/c I...don't care? If I have time to use and feel like it, I just request it off w/o much notice.</quote>Well... she actually got in touch with my boss and booked it off for me. That kinda annoyed me in itself. Ill have a chat with her later and let everyone know how it goes. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Compsognathus 10/24/23 11:23:33 AM #66:	Just remember her heart was in the right place. Be gracious and thankful that she cares about you enough to do this in the first place and absolutely thank her for the thought behind it. But that you think it would be beneficial to discuss when surprises make the most sense in the relationship and how vacations probably aren't part of that. --- 1 line break(s), 160 characters allowed <cite>Compsognathus posted [p:976833680] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Just remember her heart was in the right place. Be gracious and thankful that she cares about you enough to do this in the first place and absolutely thank her for the thought behind it. But that you think it would be beneficial to discuss when surprises make the most sense in the relationship and how vacations probably aren't part of that. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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R1masher 10/24/23 11:31:57 AM #68:	For a lesser man this would end in divorce, ce was the right choice --- R1R1R1R1R1R1 <cite>R1masher posted [p:976833822] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>For a lesser man this would end in divorce, ce was the right choice </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Smackems 10/24/23 11:33:55 AM #69:	Next time be VERY upfront about what it is you want to do on your time off --- Common sense says it may not taste good, but it'll make a turd. <cite>Smackems posted [p:976833845] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Next time be VERY upfront about what it is you want to do on your time off </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
punkfanalways 10/24/23 11:35:06 AM #70:	Smackems posted... Next time be VERY upfront about what it is you want to do on your time off I didnt even book the time off. My wife spoke to my boss and booked it off for me. <cite>punkfanalways posted [p:976833861] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Smackems posted... </cite><quote>Next time be VERY upfront about what it is you want to do on your time off</quote>I didnt even book the time off. My wife spoke to my boss and booked it off for me. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Smackems 10/24/23 11:37:23 AM #71:	punkfanalways posted... I didnt even book the time off. My wife spoke to my boss and booked it off for me. As the one dude said her heart was in the right place, but I would let her know, nicely, not to do anything like that again Just choose your words carefully. Don't be a dick And try to make the best of it. Get out of this mindset best you can and enjoy some time with her away from your home --- Common sense says it may not taste good, but it'll make a turd. <cite>Smackems posted [p:976833890] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>punkfanalways posted... </cite><quote>I didnt even book the time off. My wife spoke to my boss and booked it off for me.</quote>As the one dude said her heart was in the right place, but I would let her know, nicely, not to do anything like that again Just choose your words carefully. Don't be a dickAnd try to make the best of it. Get out of this mindset best you can and enjoy some time with her away from your home </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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FolkenRawr 10/24/23 11:56:41 AM #73:	punkfanalways posted... I didnt even book the time off. My wife spoke to my boss and booked it off for me. ... Oh. That uh. Yea, that changes literally everything. --- Cookin like a chef, I'm a 5 Star Michelin <cite>FolkenRawr posted [p:976834167] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>punkfanalways posted... </cite><quote>I didnt even book the time off. My wife spoke to my boss and booked it off for me.</quote>... Oh. That uh. Yea, that changes literally everything. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
cuttin_in_farm 10/24/23 12:42:07 PM #74:	punkfanalways posted... I didnt even book the time off. My wife spoke to my boss and booked it off for me. Wait, what? Lol. Wtf is your boss doing accepting limited time off requests from someone not you? And your wife put in this much work but couldnt do a review of the cabin first? Lol. Sorry, its just funny. Bless her heart for trying. --- A show of kindness may not do much help, but a show of cruelty may do much harm. <cite>cuttin_in_farm posted [p:976834832] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>punkfanalways posted... </cite><quote>I didnt even book the time off. My wife spoke to my boss and booked it off for me.</quote>Wait, what? Lol. Wtf is your boss doing accepting limited time off requests from someone not you?And your wife put in this much work but couldnt do a review of the cabin first?Lol. Sorry, its just funny. Bless her heart for trying. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Westernwolf4 10/24/23 12:44:39 PM #75:	ai123 posted... Seems like that will achieve nothing except to make your wife feel bad for trying to do something nice. She knows it hasn't worked out like she wanted. No need to add to it. --- An opinion does not turn into a fact simply because the person holding it feels strongly about it. <cite>Westernwolf4 posted [p:976834874] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>ai123 posted... </cite><quote>Seems like that will achieve nothing except to make your wife feel bad for trying to do something nice.She knows it hasn't worked out like she wanted. No need to add to it.</quote> </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
TripleDouble 10/24/23 12:50:06 PM #76:	Pics of small cabin --- You're failing. So you blame congress, the president, you blame Greece. But if you looked in the mirror and blamed yourself, you wouldn't like it very much. <cite>TripleDouble posted [p:976834952] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Pics of small cabin </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Villain_S_Fiend 10/24/23 12:51:11 PM #77:	Yeah, I think a lot of the "she needs to be told" types of takes come from the conceit that your partner isn't capable of thinking of things, coming to conclusions, etc., without explicit guidance from you. --- The food here is terrible. My steak was so tough it attacked my coffee and the coffee was too weak to defend itself. <cite>Villain_S_Fiend posted [p:976834968] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Yeah, I think a lot of the "she needs to be told" types of takes come from the conceit that your partner isn't capable of thinking of things, coming to conclusions, etc., without explicit guidance from you. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
punkfanalways 10/24/23 1:02:08 PM #78:	TripleDouble posted... Pics of small cabin https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/5/7/2/AAffeCAAE-As.jpg <cite>punkfanalways posted [p:976835122] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>TripleDouble posted... </cite><quote>Pics of small cabin</quote>https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/5/7/2/AAffeCAAE-As.jpg </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
punkfanalways 10/24/23 1:03:57 PM #79:	Ive told her about the topic. This is what she has to say: Warning. Swearing. https://voca.ro/196AxyHgoZbt <cite>punkfanalways posted [p:976835154] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Ive told her about the topic. This is what she has to say:Warning. Swearing. https://voca.ro/196AxyHgoZbt</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
MrResetti 10/24/23 1:04:24 PM #80:	stahlbaum posted... Make the best of it. Don't fall into the four horsement of relationship apocoplyse... criticism. https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-four-horsemen-recognizing-criticism-contempt-defensiveness-and-stonewalling/ Your points are valid, but if you are having a bad time, so is she. She likely knows she made a mistake. One time my girlfriend made me supper and it was burnt and horrible. I ate it and didn't say a word. She knew it was crappy and didn't need anyone to pile on. She asked why I didn't complain afterwords and I told her words do damage and she did something nice for me by cooking me dinner. Sometimes you don't know how a persons day went and negative words can have horrible consequences in a relationship. She will love you all the more if you work through it without complaining. Lmao, yeah this happened <cite>MrResetti posted [p:976835159] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>stahlbaum posted... </cite><quote>Make the best of it. Don't fall into the four horsement of relationship apocoplyse... criticism.https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-four-horsemen-recognizing-criticism-contempt-defensiveness-and-stonewalling/Your points are valid, but if you are having a bad time, so is she. She likely knows she made a mistake.One time my girlfriend made me supper and it was burnt and horrible. I ate it and didn't say a word. She knew it was crappy and didn't need anyone to pile on. She asked why I didn't complain afterwords and I told her words do damage and she did something nice for me by cooking me dinner. Sometimes you don't know how a persons day went and negative words can have horrible consequences in a relationship. She will love you all the more if you work through it without complaining.</quote>Lmao, yeah this happened </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Naysaspace 10/24/23 1:06:06 PM #81:	MrResetti posted... Lmao, yeah this happened Whats so unbelievable about that? <cite>Naysaspace posted [p:976835187] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>MrResetti posted... </cite><quote>Lmao, yeah this happened</quote>Whats so unbelievable about that?</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
MorganTJ 10/24/23 1:06:58 PM #82:	punkfanalways posted... https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/5/7/2/AAffeCAAE-As.jpg Aw I was expecting Evil Dead. <cite>MorganTJ posted [p:976835202] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>punkfanalways posted... </cite><quote>https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/5/7/2/AAffeCAAE-As.jpg</quote>Aw I was expecting Evil Dead.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
FolkenRawr 10/24/23 1:13:20 PM #83:	Naysaspace posted... Whats so unbelievable about that? Lmao right? I'm a decent cook and have absolutely botched the shit out of meals, as has my girlfriend --- Cookin like a chef, I'm a 5 Star Michelin <cite>FolkenRawr posted [p:976835309] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Naysaspace posted... </cite><quote>Whats so unbelievable about that?</quote>Lmao right? I'm a decent cook and have absolutely botched the shit out of meals, as has my girlfriend </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
MatzoTov 10/24/23 1:29:00 PM #84:	punkfanalways posted... Ive told her about the topic. This is what she has to say: Warning. Swearing. https://voca.ro/196AxyHgoZbt Lol That place looks fucking tiny though. Agreed with TC. Sounds like she's in good spirits about it at least and didn't take any personal offense to your issues with the place. --- Sigless by choice <cite>MatzoTov posted [p:976835565] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>punkfanalways posted... </cite><quote>Ive told her about the topic. This is what she has to say:Warning. Swearing. https://voca.ro/196AxyHgoZbt</quote>LolThat place looks fucking tiny though. Agreed with TC. Sounds like she's in good spirits about it at least and didn't take any personal offense to your issues with the place. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Pow_Pow_Punishment 10/24/23 2:07:54 PM #85:	The last time I went camping with my SO, we had the only reserved camping spot on the site that had zero shade and we were baking in the sun. We laughingly griped about the bad luck, went on a short hike to enjoy some nature, and then left early. Taking it in good stride will show you appreciate her efforts but you can still get the point across that you want to split. Talk about a do-over next time with better planning to show you're still interested in a similar idea but you can have better accommodations next round. --- Currently playing: Skyrim, Hearthstone Training log: https://powpowpunishment.blogspot.com <cite>Pow_Pow_Punishment posted [p:976836172] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>The last time I went camping with my SO, we had the only reserved camping spot on the site that had zero shade and we were baking in the sun. We laughingly griped about the bad luck, went on a short hike to enjoy some nature, and then left early.Taking it in good stride will show you appreciate her efforts but you can still get the point across that you want to split. Talk about a do-over next time with better planning to show you're still interested in a similar idea but you can have better accommodations next round. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Westernwolf4 10/24/23 2:19:52 PM #86:	I am in a 25 year marriage, and I still dont know much about relationships. Seriously-I just found someone patient enough to put up with me. But one thing I know for sure: If your significant other is acting in good faith and trying to do something nice, it is usually best to just let it go if it goes wrong. There are plenty of times when couples have to have hard conversations and arguments about the big issues of life. Adding to that when a spouse is proceeding in good faith makes things really hard. So you eat that burned dinner, and you sit through that terrible movie and you endure that bad weekend trip without piling on. Partly because it is kind to give someone you love a soft place to land when things go bad. Partly because your relationship is a lot longer than a lost weekend, especially if your significant other really gets offended by being called out. And partly because sometimes those kinds of trips end up being the best for future jokes and family lore. But mostly: There is every chance I will be the one to burn dinner or plan that bad trip tomorrow. If so, I want my wife to treat me with grace, just like she has every right to expect from me. --- An opinion does not turn into a fact simply because the person holding it feels strongly about it. <cite>Westernwolf4 posted [p:976836379] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>I am in a 25 year marriage, and I still dont know much about relationships. Seriously-I just found someone patient enough to put up with me.But one thing I know for sure: If your significant other is acting in good faith and trying to do something nice, it is usually best to just let it go if it goes wrong. There are plenty of times when couples have to have hard conversations and arguments about the big issues of life. Adding to that when a spouse is proceeding in good faith makes things really hard.So you eat that burned dinner, and you sit through that terrible movie and you endure that bad weekend trip without piling on. Partly because it is kind to give someone you love a soft place to land when things go bad. Partly because your relationship is a lot longer than a lost weekend, especially if your significant other really gets offended by being called out. And partly because sometimes those kinds of trips end up being the best for future jokes and family lore.But mostly: There is every chance I will be the one to burn dinner or plan that bad trip tomorrow. If so, I want my wife to treat me with grace, just like she has every right to expect from me. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Westernwolf4 10/24/23 2:21:12 PM #87:	Pow_Pow_Punishment posted... The last time I went camping with my SO, we had the only reserved camping spot on the site that had zero shade and we were baking in the sun. We laughingly griped about the bad luck, went on a short hike to enjoy some nature, and then left early. Taking it in good stride will show you appreciate her efforts but you can still get the point across that you want to split. Talk about a do-over next time with better planning to show you're still interested in a similar idea but you can have better accommodations next round. You and your SO handled this perfectly. --- An opinion does not turn into a fact simply because the person holding it feels strongly about it. <cite>Westernwolf4 posted [p:976836406] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Pow_Pow_Punishment posted... </cite><quote>The last time I went camping with my SO, we had the only reserved camping spot on the site that had zero shade and we were baking in the sun. We laughingly griped about the bad luck, went on a short hike to enjoy some nature, and then left early.Taking it in good stride will show you appreciate her efforts but you can still get the point across that you want to split. Talk about a do-over next time with better planning to show you're still interested in a similar idea but you can have better accommodations next round.</quote>You and your SO handled this perfectly. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
punkfanalways 10/25/23 2:37:03 PM #88:	Great news. We have decided to leave one day early. The choice was leave at around 7pm or get up and make sure we were out by 10. We decided wed rather go home tonight and have a lazy morning in a comfy bed. <cite>punkfanalways posted [p:976855170] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Great news. We have decided to leave one day early. The choice was leave at around 7pm or get up and make sure we were out by 10. We decided wed rather go home tonight and have a lazy morning in a comfy bed. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
MatzoTov 10/25/23 5:18:44 PM #89:	punkfanalways posted... Great news. We have decided to leave one day early. The choice was leave at around 7pm or get up and make sure we were out by 10. We decided wed rather go home tonight and have a lazy morning in a comfy bed. poggers --- Sigless by choice <cite>MatzoTov posted [p:976858082] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>punkfanalways posted... </cite><quote>Great news. We have decided to leave one day early. The choice was leave at around 7pm or get up and make sure we were out by 10. We decided wed rather go home tonight and have a lazy morning in a comfy bed.</quote>poggers </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
#90	Post #90 was unavailable or deleted.
punkfanalways 10/25/23 6:17:26 PM #91:	MatzoTov posted... poggers ??? <cite>punkfanalways posted [p:976859019] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>MatzoTov posted... </cite><quote>poggers</quote>???</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KitKats 10/25/23 6:22:39 PM #92:	Is this you? https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/7/8/9/AAevWaAAE-Tt.jpg --- her/she <cite>KitKats posted [p:976859109] in How do I t... [t:80601635]...</cite> <quote>Is this you?https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/7/8/9/AAevWaAAE-Tt.jpg </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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Current Events > How do I tell my wife I hate the surprise week she's bought away for us? (+) Yeah! (+)

Current Events > How do I tell my wife I hate the surprise week she's bought away for us?