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Current Events > Man attempts to cross Atlantic Ocean in giant hamster ball

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Crazyman93
09/08/23 6:12:29 PM
#1:


My first thought: "how far off the coast of Florida?"

https://www.npr.org/2023/09/07/1198252469/coast-guard-hamster-wheel-reza-baluchi-atlantic-ocean
Try as he might, Reza Baluchi can't reach his destination without running afoul of the U.S. Coast Guard.
The key problem is his vessel: a giant floating hamster wheel made of buoys and wire, self-propelled by Baluchi running inside.
Baluchi, who lives in Florida after being granted asylum from Iran, was taken in by the Coast Guard last week aboard his vessel, following several days of back and forth with the authorities.

Try as he might, Reza Baluchi can't reach his destination without running afoul of the U.S. Coast Guard.
The key problem is his vessel: a giant floating hamster wheel made of buoys and wire, self-propelled by Baluchi running inside.
Baluchi, who lives in Florida after being granted asylum from Iran, was taken in by the Coast Guard last week aboard his vessel, following several days of back and forth with the authorities.
According to a criminal complaint filed in U.S. district court in South Florida, the Coast Guard cutter Valiant came across Baluchi and his homemade vessel about 70 nautical miles east of Tybee Island, Ga., on Aug. 26 as the Coast Guard was preparing for Hurricane Franklin.

More in the article, too much of a pain to copy on mobile, but he threatened to kill himself and then blow himself up when they tried to board his death trap. He's charged with Obstruction of Boarding and ignoring an order from the Captain of Port (he has tried this before and was told to cut it out).

And of course it was Florida, because where else would this happen?

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FortuneCookie
09/08/23 6:17:54 PM
#2:


Why didn't we let him leave?
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ProfessorKukui
09/08/23 6:43:48 PM
#3:


I too would regret my decision of living in Florida

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Turbam
09/08/23 6:46:43 PM
#4:


Homie just needs to make it to international waters!

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NeonTentacles
09/08/23 6:50:43 PM
#5:


If he shits in the ball, does it just roll around with him?

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https://imgur.com/aMaI3hj https://imgur.com/7PsdJNc
https://imgur.com/eK8vZVn https://imgur.com/u2HR4nG https://imgur.com/nQGM5cZ
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Tyranthraxus
09/08/23 6:56:33 PM
#6:


NeonTentacles posted...
If he shits in the ball, does it just roll around with him?

I don't think he thought that far ahead

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Crazyman93
09/08/23 7:15:09 PM
#7:


Tyranthraxus posted...
I don't think he thought that far ahead
From the sound of things he didnt even have enough food and water for this

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Kradek
09/08/23 7:22:35 PM
#8:


I'm glad the government will intervene for the best health interest of their populace, because this guy has failed many times and if nobody had ever stopped him he would have died within his ball the first expedition he made in it.


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WilliamPorygon
09/08/23 7:40:43 PM
#9:


Must have seen one too many American Gladiators episodes

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bigtiggie23
09/08/23 7:54:51 PM
#10:


You know how at Sea World they have that show where dolphins will bat around a beach ball with their noses? That was going to be this guy eventually.

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Crazyman93
09/08/23 9:12:35 PM
#11:


Kradek posted...
I'm glad the government will intervene for the best health interest of their populace, because this guy has failed many times and if nobody had ever stopped him he would have died within his ball the first expedition he made in it.
Yeah, I mean, the first time he tried this, he was reported as "asking for directions and appearing to have no idea what he was doing"

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