Current Events > My mom is thinking about suing my dad's hospital (rant).

(+) Yeah! (+)

I don't know if any of y'all will even read this, I just wanted to get it off my chest.

About a month ago, he was extremely constipated. Didn't go for like a week straight. Doctor said it was an impacted bowel, gave him some stool softener and the life, gave him a referral to see a GI doctor in like three weeks. This one already pissed me off because an impacted bowel can fucking kill you and they sent the man home with some Exlax and a month-long wait.

Eventually, the pain overcame him. Went again. Gave him an enema this time, basically nothing happened, sent him home again. Same shit again, he went back a few days later. This time they do their goddamn jobs and realize, oh, it's not an impacted bowel. He has fucking colon cancer and a mass is blocking his intestine.

Cancer sucks regardless, of course, but the prognosis is optimistic. He has to get a colostomy to bypass the mass, but they even think that'll be temporary once chemo and everything is over with. Relatively great news. He gets the surgery, it goes fine, comes home a while later.

They get home, colostomy bag starts to leak. No big deal, right? They showed my mom how to change it, but it's not like she'd ever done it before. Plus the bags they sent her home with were not the same ones they showed her how to use. Bound to be a few mistakes before you get it right. Except no. A couple days go by and it just immediately leaks whenever he has a bowel movement. Having caustic shit trapped under the seal begins to wear down the skin, so they go back to the hospital.

(By the way, the hospital they were sent to is forty minutes away. So a long-ass drive whenever they have to go.)

Naturally, the hospital just says that my mom is doing it wrong. Sure. Hell, at this point I was thinking the same thing. The stoma has a little white plastic bit on it which the doctor tells the nurse to stick the bag under. Well, turns out the bit is fucking stitched to his skin, so A+ medical care right there. Nurse cuts the stitch, puts the bag on. My mom has a better idea of what to do, so they're sent home. They're home for maybe an hour before the bag the nurse - who'd been doing that for twenty years - put on begins to leak.

We're still going with the idea that this is just something that happens when you first get one. Mom talks to people on Facebook who have it done and they say the first little bit is a little trial and error. She tries some things like putting a heating pad on the site to help the adhesive stick. Seems to work a little better, but it still leaks way more than it's meant to. Though of course any leaking is more than it's meant to because it's not fucking supposed to do that.

So they eventually go back to the hospital. Same shit. Show her how to put the bag on. Bag the doctor put on leaks before they even leave the hospital. But regardless they're sent home. Keep in mind that this entire time, the hospital has still not set up the home healthcare stuff properly, so mom is buying bags off of fucking Amazon and shit.

Because the hospital hadn't done any-fucking-thing to help, naturally the bag starts to leak again. My mom finally notices that there's a small hole in the stoma where there's not supposed to be one and that's where it's leaking. My parents go to the hospital again and this time my mom shows her ass. Finally, they look at it and realize, oh the surgeon apparently nicked it a little in the wrong place. They stitch it up, he goes home. Finally, everything seems to be working right.

About a week goes by, they have to go again because dad is feeling incredibly light-headed and dizzy. This time it turns out his magnesium is low which is a common side effect of colostomies but they hadn't bothered to tell him to take supplements or anything.

A few days go by, they run out of bags because the hospital has still not set up home healthcare right. My mom calls the hospital to ask if they can just come up there and get a couple fucking bags, they're told they have to be admitted. Which means, like every other time they had to go, they drive for forty minutes and wait about six-ten hours in the waiting room. She manages to get some bags from somewhere, I don't even fucking know where.

Then this morning, dad wakes at about seven. Says he can't feel his right foot. A little time goes by, it spreads to his entire leg. Goes to the local hospital and they airlift him to the other one because he has a blood clot in his leg. Why? Because he's been taking blood thinners for years for this exact fucking issue, they took him off for the surgery, and never told him when to go back on them. There was talk of him losing his goddamn leg, but they luckily seem to have managed to dissolve the clots without going to that extreme.

And the real cherry on this sundae is that any time they have to go back to the hospital for something like this, it just delays his cancer treatment. They already had to move one appointment with the radiation doctor because they were dealing with this garbage. It's been a fucking nightmare for a month all because this hospital keeps fucking up.

Damn, that's frustrating. And scary. It can definitely be difficult to get attentive treatment. I know my mom has had a hell of a time getting doctors to really listen to the things she's tried to tell them before and it's screwed her over a few times. I'm sorry you guys have had to go through all that. Hope he gets better soon.

I'd encourage her to do so, this kind of shit is fairly common and they seem to give no regard to people's pain and suffering a lot.

This all sounds like a nightmare, I'm sorry they are so incompetent.

that sounds like a fucking nightmare. I hope your dad feels better.

I'm Sorry your parents had to deal with this . Sue their asses .

MabusIncarnate posted...

I'd encourage her to do so, this kind of shit is fairly common and they seem to give no regard to people's pain and suffering a lot.

This all sounds like a nightmare, I'm sorry they are so incompetent.

I second all of this. Good doctors trying their best amid staffing shortages, bad management, and huge patient numbers have my sympathy. But there are a lot of shitty doctors and nurses who don't know what the hell they are doing and lack any empathy. The low level of care your dad is receiving is outrageous. Do whatever you can to fight for him, and for the people who aren't him that the hospital is doing the same thing to. There will be others, because there always are.

Thanks for the kind words.

The funny thing is that when it all started, I mentioned the hospital he was in to a coworker. She said they were garbage and I kind of laughed her off. Now she wants us to sue them more than my mom does lol.

Thats god damn horrifying. Id be furious as well.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

This is America, I can sue anybody for anything.

But you're probably right, nothing would happen.

pegusus123456 posted...

This is America, I can sue anybody for anything.

But you're probably right, nothing would happen.

Do you know a lawyer you can talk too. Also can you go to a new er.

S*** like that is exactly why Im terrified of going to the doctor. I probably have issues that need to be taken care of but as a single guy on my own, I dont have the time OR money to spend dealing with all the bullshit.

Hope you guys fuck some incompetents over.

If anyone's curious, he had to go back to the hospital again (luckily the local one this time) because they did some kind of scan where they put a dye or something up his butt. That irritated the tumor in his rectum to the point it started bleeding. And because he was on hardcore blood thinners, it meant that it wouldn't stop.

So at least this time it wasn't due to anyone's incompetence, but hopefully the poor dude will be able to stay home for a while after this.

Ughh, that sounds awful. I've been dealing with a serious problem since 2021 because multiple doctors and physical therapists didn't take it seriously.

Healthcare professionals telling you its fine when you know its not is such a horrible feeling.

The amount of incompetence on display is astounding. I'm sorry you've had to deal with that.

Sorry bout all that. This is the result of applying fast food administration to health care. Also couples with a few drs and nurses that doesnt seem to be really in it for patient care. At the same time, you also have to be proactive asking every single detail you can like what with the bloodthinners.

That sounds awful

I doubt you can do anything, but maybe call up a lawyer for a free consultation. Mistakes during surgery are something especially serious iirc

My condolences. I think you definitely have a case if you go over it with a lawyer. All those details point to unsafe discharge and negligence. A complaint to the Department of Health will also trigger an investigation or a survey period and whatever findings they see during that will make your case even stronger.

Yeah sue the shit out of them if possible, this sort of shit shouldn't even happen to begin with what the shit

Same thing happened to my step-mom's mom. She felt constipated and was blowing up like a balloon. She was almost 65 and she looked pregnant. They just told her that it was gas and constipation. She went back in a few more times, still insisted it was gas and constipation. She went for a second opinion and was told she had stage 4 pancreatic cancer and started to spread. She passed a few weeks later. My step-ma and her dad got a nice chunk from that hospital.

I'm sorry your dad and mom are dealing with all that. Hopefully your dad is able to get the cancer treatment started and that goes well.

I hate the state of healthcare. You essentially have to be a Karen to get anyone to actually listen to you when you know they are just blowing you off.

He seems to be doing alright now. Still bleeding a little, but they basically said that it's just going to happen and not to worry unless his hemoglobin gets low.