Poll of the Day > How do you break up with friends?

(+) Yeah! (+)

I've always really struggled with what to do when it feels like a friendship is holding me back instead of helping me. I always have an urge to be self-destructive and try to annihilate the friendship so I can't go back, but 1) I don't want to do that anymore and 2) it doesn't actually work, I'll try to come back anyway when I'm feeling bad enough

So I feel like I need a better way to do it. Here's the options I thought of

A) formal "I don't think we should talk anymore"
B) don't start conversations and just gray rock with them/never commit to plans and explain the situation if they ask what's up
C) just fuckin ghost 'em

I feel like A seems like the most "right" thing to do but I know it'll start a huge argument I don't want to deal with and it also feels scary and final in a way that freaks me out. C definitely seems bad to me for long-term friendships. So I'm leaning towards B or some other option in that space

B and C are the same thing, you're just conflict-avoidant, nothing wrong with that. Go with whatever makes your life easier. No use providing yourself additional stress.

GanglyKhan posted...

B and C are the same thing, you're just conflict-avoidant, nothing wrong with that. Go with whatever makes your life easier. No use providing yourself additional stress.

I don't really think "stop replying to them cold turkey" and "just send back low energy" are the same in terms of how it feels to the other person at all

I'd go with A and then just not talk to them and hang out with them anymore.

Of those options A is the best. Its better to just confront it and deal with it. It might be difficult and scary, but its better than doing some half thing where youre constantly just avoiding them and cant just pull the bandaid off. That halfway approach of B doesnt benefit anyone, because youre still stuck with it in a way, and youre giving the former friend false hope while slowly whittling away at their self-esteem. People arent dumb and will catch on when youre avoiding them, and with seemingly no reason given and acting like maybe theres a chance you might in the future youre just sending mixed signals. Just do whats best for everyone and deal with the situation without beating around the bush.

chelsea___wtf posted...

I don't really think "stop replying to them cold turkey" and "just send back low energy" are the same in terms of how it feels to the other person at all

Most people can read between the lines and get the picture at the end of the day though. Not sure what this person is like, but it's a common enough social cue to understand the connection between a permanent cold shoulder and not wanting to talk any longer. In any case, cheers to you and I hope it works out in your favor.

Tell them that you have no use for them anymore

I really can't say cause it depends on how bad the friendship is, my method in the past has just been to drift away untill interaction is minimal and stay away from spaces you know they may frequent. maybe try to make new friends so you have an excuse for spending time with them?

You get assaulted by them and then let them live with you.

sunny bruh, you gotta let it go. its so weird to be that obsessed about the personal life of someone whom youve never met

What? That's how I have always dealt with bad friends.

Through personal choice I don't have any friends but did come fruition this particular thread to say good luck on your current endeavors@The topic creator also usually in life your intuition is definite should you deviate from forementioned hindsight shall ensue

Several times in the past, I have told those who have hurt me that I no longer wanted communication with them because it was causing too much stress. Some I just kept saying that I was too busy didn't start any form communication with them. This was easier to do last century without so many online communities and mobile devices. Back then, if I moved and don't give them my new address and phone number, I would lose touch with them.

SunWuKung420 posted...

You get assaulted by them and then let them live with you.

please don't be weird in my topics like this. there are plenty of legal ways to be weird in my topics, this is not one of them

ReanimatedJutsu posted...

Through personal choice I don't have any friends but did come fruition this particular thread to say good luck on your current endeavors@The topic creator also usually in life your intuition is definite should you deviate from forementioned hindsight shall ensue

thanks for the wise advice revived jutsu. From now on I will trust my intuition. tell me if you ever want to make a friend

SunWuKung420 posted...

You get assaulted by them and then let them live with you.

Damn. This fuckin dude made like three days before he got drunk and posted on here lmao

Cacciato posted...

Damn. This fuckin dude made like three days before he got drunk and posted on here lmao

please dont be weird in my topics like this. be weird like reanimated jutsu instead

Had a friend that ended up making bad financial decisions and getting another friend involved and we just cut all communications off.

lol i didn't know they still lurked here and they saw this topic so apparently the answer is D) make a gamefaqs thread

im kind of glad though would've taken forever for me to confront them and its probably good to have it over with. I'll miss talking to them a lot though