Current Events > What do you think about people who claim to be "queer", but engage

(+) Yeah! (+)

... exclusively in heterosexual relationship? I have seen quite a few people saying that can be hetero and queer and to me it makes no sense. Am I getting old or what?

Not every queer person is bi or pan, and even then, you can be bi or pan and still exclusively be in straight relationships. There's a lot of hatred and erasure towards bi and pan people in the gay/lesbian community specifically, and I'd rather you not be a part of it.

Garioshi posted...

Not every queer person is bi or pan, and even then, you can be bi or pan and still exclusively be in straight relationships. There's a lot of hatred and erasure towards bi and pan people in the gay/lesbian community specifically, and I'd rather you not be a part of it.

That's not what I was referring to. I was talking about people who claimed straight people who are also cis can be queer

iirc, it no longer means gay, but something that doesn't fit cleanly anywhere under the LGBTQ+ umbrella

I like the word queer because it covers a lot of bases tbh

pinky0926 posted...

I like the word queer because it covers a lot of bases tbh

You should ask people in they like the word or not before using it because it was used as a slur not that long ago and it exclusively targeted gay men.

epik_fail1 posted...

You should ask people in they like the word or not before using it because it was used as a slur not that long ago and it exclusively targeted gay men.

Yeah, and they specifically reclaimed it literal decades ago (IIRC, ACT UP was primarily responsible) and it has since evolved to be a broadly applicable term for some one who doesn't fit in a cisnormative and/or heteronormative roles.

It's really not hard to find this information, either.

ElatedVenusaur posted...

Yeah, and they specifically reclaimed it literal decades ago (IIRC, ACT UP was primarily responsible) and it has since evolved to be a broadly applicable term for some one who doesn't fit in a cisnormative and/or heteronormative roles.

It's really not hard to find this information, either.

It's not really hard to not be entitled and not use a word that might make people who suffered from homophobia while using said slur from past bullying. It was still used as a slur in msn messenger day. The n word had been reclaimed by black people, but you would not say it would you?

TC, shut the hell up.

it looks good on a essay submission to university. i encourage it.

I'm not straight, but do not feel comfortable using that word personally, as it still feels loaded with slur energy in my mind.

I might have to think about them the same way I think about people who claim sexuality and have no sexual relations... I think someone would try to validate that and consider doing so unethical

epik_fail1 posted...

It's not really hard to not be entitled and not use a word that might make people who suffered from homophobia while using said slur from past bullying. It was still used as a slur in msn messenger day. The n word had been reclaimed by black people, but you would not say it would you?

Wtf are you on about? It was literally just explained to you that the word was reclaimed and now people use it to describe themselves. I have multiple friends that identify as queer.

So you can be straight and be queer?

NoxObscuras posted...

Wtf are you on about? It was literally just explained to you that the word was reclaimed and now people use it to describe themselves. I have multiple friends that identify as queer.

Nothing needed to be explained to him. He knows this. He is a gay man. He knows people identify that way. He was saying to check with others before using the term if they themselves haven't already done so or calmed to be okay with it. Not everyone is alright being labeled so.

Anyway, the topic is talking about people that are cishet but say they are queer with no real explanation behind why they identify that way.

maybe they have gay fantasies

epik_fail1 posted...

You should ask people in they like the word or not before using it because it was used as a slur not that long ago and it exclusively targeted gay men.

Ask what people? Non straight people, presumably. I'd get a hundred different answers.

myzz7 posted...

it looks good on a essay submission to university. i encourage it.

lol this

NoxObscuras posted...

Wtf are you on about? It was literally just explained to you that the word was reclaimed and now people use it to describe themselves. I have multiple friends that identify as queer.

And you have multiple gay friends who hate the label. Your friend identify as queer, but others hate it due to it's history. Just don't call some gay dude a queer if he doesn't like it. It's not hard

pinky0926 posted...

Ask what people? Non straight people, presumably. I'd get a hundred different answers.

Which is exactly the reason you should ask

epik_fail1 posted...

And you have multiple gay friends who hate the label. Your friend identify as queer, but others hate it due to it's history. Just don't call some gay dude a queer if he doesn't like it. It's not hard

from my experience, people self-identify as "queer" or refer to someone else as "queer" if it's something that the other person disclosed to them.

I know it's anecdotal, but I don't randomly hear anyone refer to anyone else as "queer" these days.

Ryangrad posted...

Anyway, the topic is talking about people that are cishet but say they are queer with no real explanation behind why they identify that way.

It is kind of trendy to some people who use it to make themselves look more interesting. Depends on the area you live of course.

I'm a gay man, but I'm not queer. And if anybody called me that, I'd consider it a slur and they'd get decked.

Ryangrad posted...

Nothing needed to be explained to him. He knows this. He is a gay man. He knows people identify that way. He was saying to check with others before using the term if they themselves haven't already done so or calmed to be okay with it. Not everyone is alright being labeled so.

I wouldn't know that from the topic. All i saw was one person commented that they liked the word because it covers a lot of bases and TC went on this weird rant.

epik_fail1 posted...

And you have multiple gay friends who hate the label. Your friend identify as queer, but others hate it due to it's history. Just don't call some gay dude a queer if he doesn't like it. It's not hard

"It's not hard"

Why are you talking to me like I'm out here just labeling people however I want? I only use the labels that my friends want to be identified as.

epik_fail1 posted...

Which is exactly the reason you should ask

I mean I fairly regularly attend events labelled as queer, maybe its different in the UK but it doesn't seem a derogatory term here, anymore than gay is

I think it's some sorta phobic to think anything negatively about someone who does that

Unless you're trying to describe queerbaiting which is very common on social media apps in which case I think it's really fucking lame and idiotic.

I only care enough to tell you I don't care. Out of all the things you could get offended by, if you wanna choose something this dumb, that's up to you.

This isn't directed at TC.

I don't get what any of these words mean anymore. I come from a simpler time when you either liked men, women, both, or neither.