Current Events > Don't ghost people. Grow up and be straightforward with them

(+) Yeah! (+)

Its really not difficult.

Watch CE struggle to wrap their heads around it.

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Tell us what happened, bro

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SwayM posted...

Its really not difficult.

Watch CE struggle to wrap their heads around it.

How is it not difficult?

TheoryzC posted...

Tell us what happened, bro

Nothing too interesting but for the sake of conversations, here goes.

Met up with a gal. Had a lovely coffee date. Great conversations the whole time, similar interests, flirty, etc. She apologized for only having time for coffee that day and she would let me know next time she was free.

We text after she says she had a great time. I say, lets do it again. She says I would like that tells me shell let me know what her schedule is next week. Its next week, I dont hear nothing, I message her asking her how shes doing. No reply.

If you arent interestedjust say that? Shes literally a doctor (dentist, dont be an anti-dentite). How are you gonna be that immature to show intention and interest and then not be grown up and upfront if that wasnt sincere or things change.

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Love transcends language.

^^^

1 blown off text the week of thanksgiving is nothing lol

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Sounds like she lost interest or found someone else

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ScofieldReturns posted...

1 blown off text the week of thanksgiving is nothing lol

Canadian. We had thanksgiving a month ago.

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Looked gf posted...

Sounds like she lost interest or found someone else

Either situation you let a person know. Again, its not difficult.

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SwayM posted...

Either situation you let a person know. Again, its not difficult.

Exactly, it's just cowardly really.

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I've been ghosted. At least I think. Maybe they literally forgot about me or got distracted.

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Been ghosted myself plenty and ghosted plenty. It is an acceptable way at this point to break contact in a randomized dating scenario.

And for women there are enough countless horror stories of hopeless dudes trying to conjure something out of a dead connection that its actually a bit of a bad look to buck back at the trend too much.

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I had a chick once who ghosted me then a few months down the track contacted and said why did you stop talking to me... Shit was bizarre.

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ghost people


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maybe you struck her as the type that couldn't take a breakup in stride. like how you're taking being ghosted in stride.

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I understand TC is upset but ghosting is common now days. If she doesn't respond you can take the time to find someone else in the meantime. If that doesn't work you can always treat yourself right, make some money , buy yourself something badass that makes you go Wow etc

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masticatingman posted...

Been ghosted myself plenty and ghosted plenty. It is an acceptable way at this point to break contact in a randomized dating scenario.

And for women there are countless horror stories of hopeless dudes trying to conjure something out of a dead connection that its actually a bit of a bad look to buck back at the trend too much.

I completely fail to see how texting someone your intentions and feelings upfront is worse than straight up ghostingwhen you have a hopeless dude looking for a connection that isnt therewhy dont you fucking tell him?

Jesus Christ people.

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there's such a thing as taking a hint. if you demand that hint be explained to you, you're trying to leverage the situation, don't you think?

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Fluttershy posted...

there's such a thing as taking a hint. if you demand that hint be explained to you, you're trying to leverage the situation, don't you think?

If you can give a hint you can just as easily state hey Im not really feeling it, but good luck! In whatever words you chose to use.

Giving hints is childish. Stop playing games and be an adult please.

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ignoring hints is childish. ignoring them is playing games -- grow up.

like the fact that you demand explanation but don't accept that you could possibly be more perceptive says it all. righfully ghosted. look at how you're handling it -- bitching about it on a video game forum. that's the adult thing to do, right?

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my friend recommended me for a job to his boss
i got a call and interview, after that they'd notify me if i pass or fail
weeks later my friend tells me that his boss has been 'calling' me for another interview
i never got the any message, not even one miscall, pretty shitty

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Nukazie posted...

my friend recommended me for a job to his boss
i got a call and interview, after that they'd notify me if i pass or fail
weeks later my friend tells me that his boss has been 'calling' me for another interview
i never got the any message, not even one miscall, pretty shitty

Just as shitty in a work environment, absolutely.

Fluttershy posted...

ignoring hints is childish. ignoring them is playing games -- grow up.

like the fact that you demand explanation but don't accept that you could possibly be more perceptive says it all. righfully ghosted. look at how you're handling it -- bitching about it on a video game forum. that's the adult thing to do, right?

Getting a chuckle to myself because I already had you tagged as childish. Your logic astounds me. Basic human courtesy, being upfront and honest and not playing other peoples Shitty games and leaving hintsthats a game to you?



This is all I can picture now from you.

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she doesn't owe you an explanation. you can invoke concepts like courtesy all you want; all you're asking is that she placate your whining and demands. and she has absolutely no obligation.

this thread is proof that she made the right choice. you would have made it difficult if she had tried to explain, and you'd have gone all passive-aggressive when you didn't hear what you wanted, just like you did with me.

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Lmao "giving hints"

you have a mouth to comunicate, grow up.

Fluttershy posted...

she doesn't owe you an explanation

incorrect. You deserve basic common decency for your humanity. You're a human being with feelings, just like them. and fuck anyone who says optherwise tbh

ghost is immature, yeah... but i ain't gonna sit here and pretend most dudes take rejection well and could handle an honest "not interested" from a girl

some dudes melt down and get really obsessive real fast, and it's those dudes that train chicks to just ghost if they're not feeling it, it's the safest thing they can do, ghost and block on everything

SwayM posted...

Nothing too interesting but for the sake of conversations, here goes.

Met up with a gal. Had a lovely coffee date. Great conversations the whole time, similar interests, flirty, etc. She apologized for only having time for coffee that day and she would let me know next time she was free.

We text after she says she had a great time. I say, lets do it again. She says I would like that tells me [B]shell let me know what her schedule is next week[/B]. Its next week, I dont hear nothing, I message her asking her how shes doing. No reply.

If you arent interestedjust say that? Shes literally a doctor (dentist, dont be an anti-dentite). How are you gonna show intention and interest and then not be grown up and upfront if that wasnt sincere or things change

If she doesnt tell you what her schedule is at that immediate moment, its definite red flag bro

LinkDaLunatic posted...

ghost is immature, yeah... but i ain't gonna sit here and pretend most dudes take rejection well and could handle an honest "not interested" from a girl

some dudes melt down and get really obsessive real fast, and it's those dudes that train chicks to just ghost if they're not feeling it, it's the safest thing they can do, ghost and block on everything

this happens with anyone though. No one is exempt from it, you take that risk with anything the moment you try communicating

incorrect. You deserve basic common decency for your humanity.

nah, you're not entitled to any kind of treatment. and if you can make this demand, they can make the demand that you take a hint -- unless you want some sort of double standard in your favor.

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LinkDaLunatic posted...

ghost is immature, yeah... but i ain't gonna sit here and pretend most dudes take rejection well and could handle an honest "not interested" from a girl

some dudes melt down and get really obsessive real fast, and it's those dudes that train chicks to just ghost if they're not feeling it, it's the safest thing they can do, ghost and block on everything

Being ghosted is worse than getting outright rejected imo.

Fluttershy posted...

nah, you're not entitled to any kind of treatment

for your humanity? Yes absolutely

Anything otherwise is just wrong tbh, and I see why the tc is talking ot you the way he is

for your humanity? Yes absolutely

nope. you don't just get to make demands.

if you can make the demand that people treat you with this bullshit concept of courtesy where you get to demand an explanation from them, they get to make the demand that you be more compassionate and perceptive, and that you take a hint. simple.

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Drrobotniks posted...

for your humanity? Yes absolutely

Anything otherwise is just wrong tbh, and I see why the tc is talking ot you the way he is

I think he's right that you're not entitled to any kind of treatment. Ghosting isn't gonna change anyway.

Protoman2005 posted...

I think he's right that you're not entitled to any kind of treatment. Ghosting isn't gonna change anyway.

nah, communicating falls under basic common decency, I stopped talking to the other person cause he doesn't understand, or chooses not to

no, you gave up because you know you're wrong. (just in case he tries to act like i can still see his posts, he blocked me for this.)

sorry i ruined this pity party you were trying to throw, tc.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kXF3VYYa5TI

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I feel like people itt are weird.

Yes, a sizable amount of dudes take rejection poorly. But no one is asking folks to visit them in person to break the news.

In TCs example, the lady said she is interested in meeting again, and then ghosted.

I cant think of a single scenario outside dating where folks find that acceptable.

Yea, Im down to visit you, grandma!
*ghost*

My hiring manager will reach out to you after our excellent phone interview today!
*ghost*

Yea, Ill move my car
*ghost*

Like, cmon lol. Ghosting is only appropriate if after communicating; its clear the other person is unreasonable.

Lets be grownups. It doesnt make you mature to be ok with ghosting.

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cuttin_in_farm posted...

Like, cmon lol. Ghosting is only appropriate if after communicating its clear the other person is unreasonable.

yea this pretty much

but "hints" lmao

Drrobotniks posted...

this happens with anyone though. No one is exempt from it, you take that risk with anything the moment you try communicating

obviously you can't go into every conversation or potential relationship assuming the other person is a psychopath who will murder you if things don't go well

you have to try first... then, if you can tell something's not on the level, you ghost. and i call that fair. does it mean that some people who aren't psycho will be ghosted? yes. does it also mean that people are safer from the ones who are psycho? yes. it's a good tradeoff imo.

the thing about ghosting is it's a soft rejection. accept it for what it is instead of letting it break you down.

Like, cmon lol. Ghosting is only appropriate if after communicating; its clear the other person is unreasonable.

nah, it's appropriate whenever a person finds it necessary. like you're actually trying to apply an if and a when to a clean getaway. little entitled there.

also, if you want to talk maturity, how about this: try taking ghosting in stride?

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lmao TC ends up in a mental asylum cause ghosting drives him insane

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Music_Rock_Cat posted...

lmao TC ends up in a mental asylum cause ghosting drives him insane

Do you like being ignored?

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bulletproofvita posted...

Do you like being ignored?

by someone who has no life or value to the planet such as yourself, yes.

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Fluttershy posted...

also, if you want to talk maturity, how about this: try taking ghosting in stride?

Its unhealthy to think being disrespected is okay. I hope youre able to see someone for your issues.

Because setting a clear expectation, and then ghosting is disrespectful. TC could have made different plans or pursued something else if he didnt think the lady he saw had no interest. But its blatant disrespect of peoples time and emotions to not tell someone.

Again, in TCs scenario, she said she was wanting to meet again.

This isnt a date was lame and no chemistry. The guy seemed kinda clingy and dangerous scenario it seems.

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Music_Rock_Cat posted...

by someone who has no life or value to the planet such as yourself, yes.

Haha, okay

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Its unhealthy to think being disrespected is okay.

i think it's unhealthy to throw tantrums over being ghosted, and taking ghosting as some huge act of disrespect. it's as gentle as a letdown as you want to make it; it's up to you to take it like an adult or do what tc is doing.

reacting to any disrespect the way you are is petty. i can show you how easy it is to let things slide: you can literally say anything to me and i won't give it a second thought. try it.

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Being ghosted isn't necessarily disrespect. Getting ghosted is kinda aggravating though.

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Fluttershy posted...

i think it's unhealthy to throw tantrums over

You exaggerated this to make your stance seem more reasonable.

Fluttershy posted...

and taking ghosting as some huge act of disrespect

You did it here too.

I really doubt TC is tossing anything in rage. The dude typed up a post on a videogame forum. The most low effort vent possible.

But you do you.

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Not taking sides here, just curious. The stuff you guys are telling TC, would you say them to all the women out there who bitch about ghosting to their friends?

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LinkDaLunatic posted...

ghost is immature, yeah... but i ain't gonna sit here and pretend most dudes take rejection well and could handle an honest "not interested" from a girl

some dudes melt down and get really obsessive real fast, and it's those dudes that train chicks to just ghost if they're not feeling it, it's the safest thing they can do, ghost and block on everything

If someone cant handle rejection well thats a whole other conversation.

If someone was being a total idiot / creep / weirdo / douche and you felt further conversations would be a bad idea. Okay. But thats not what this topic is about.

Normal people respect other peoples time and feelings. On CE that is a foreign concept I know.

Protoman2005 posted...

If she doesnt tell you what her schedule is at that immediate moment, its definite red flag bro

lol this just sounds needy bro. I dont need your whole life locked down at a moments notice.

cuttin_in_farm posted...

I feel like people itt are weird.

They absolutely are lol. But good to see some level headed people every once in a while.

Protoman2005 posted...

Being ghosted is worse than getting outright rejected imo.

I agree.

cuttin_in_farm posted...

Its unhealthy to think being disrespected is okay. I hope youre able to see someone for your issues.

Because setting a clear expectation, and then ghosting is disrespectful. TC could have made different plans or pursued something else if he didnt think the lady he saw had no interest. But its blatant disrespect of peoples time and emotions to not tell someone.

Again, in TCs scenario, she said she was wanting to meet again.

This isnt a date was lame and no chemistry. The guy seemed kinda clingy and dangerous scenario it seems.

This is a perfect summation of it.

This aint the first time Ive been ghosted. And while its never a great feeling. This time in particular when a person literally communicates intention to see me again and then doesnt respect me enough to even reply to a message. Pretty low move for a doctor.

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shockthemonkey posted...

This is a real weird topic for people to be contrarian about. No one likes being ghosted. Nothing is gained from ghosting. It happens sometimes, we all can be forgetful, but like to defend it as a practice seems weird as hell.

For once we see eye to eye on something.

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