Current Events > So much conventional fitness motivational advice never worked for me at all

(+) Yeah! (+)

It's weird but I'm in the best shape I've been in years and basically I had to ignore so much of the usual advice in order to get there. Examples of advice that sucked for me:

"Start by following a complete, recommended program."

And do a bunch of exercises I hate and don't understand? So just spend an hour or more in the gym (a place I already don't want to be) feeling confused and overwhelmed? Nah, that's something you probably won't adhere to. Here's what worked for me to get started at the gym: go and fuck around and do whatever you want and stay for however long you want. Make no commitments for how long you'll stay or what you'll do. Don't do anything too heavy until you understand things better. If you can't go, then do it at home. Will you make optimal gains? No. Will you find it much easier to go every day? Definitely.

"Just do it. Drag your ass out of bed and push down the bad thoughts and just fucking show up no matter what."

So basically I should be in a state of constant stress, battling myself over something I don't want to do? And I'm expected to keep this battle up when I have a really bad day at work or at home? Nah. That's a fast ticket to burn out city. Instead find some kind of activity you actually ENJOY doing, and do that first. Something that magnetically pulls you to it when you're feeling stressed. Then slowly work in the stuff you don't enjoy doing (but probably should) in tiny increments. Small enough that it's a nice challenge rather than a hateful slog.

I did surfing, and was enjoying surfing a lot. And then realised that it would be good to be in better shape for surfing, so working outt became something I actively wanted to pursue. Critically though it had very little to do with wanting to be swole.

"As a noob, you should maximise your potential noob gains and progressively overload with each workout".

As a noob, you should forget about gains altogether and just work on the part of you that finds it so hard to show up and train consistently. Do this very slowly, and follow whatever activity that keeps you moving. Literally the first 3 months shouldn't be about making body or fitness progress at all, it should be about doing brain physio. There's a part of you that just doesn't see this as part of your lifestyle and that's the part to train first.

"Use discipline, not motivation."

This isn't bad advice but on the face of it looks like you should just...have discipline. I.e. if you don't have discipline then you're just lazy, and you're fundamentally missing a vital character quality. And frankly some people's idea of discipline is just motivation with a touch of meanness, e.g. David Goggins screaming at you that you're a fat piece of shit. That doesn't work for me.

Discipline is just something you train and get better at, like anything else. You actually have a lot of discipline. Everyone does. You're disciplined at sitting, playing videogames, overeating, drinking alcohol. Heaps of discipline for all those things, because you trained for that. You didn't wake up one day and just start puttiing away a 6 pack of beer like it was nothing. That discipline took years to develop.

So if you don't have discipline that's fine, you can kinda just get better at it slowly.

"Weigh yourself every week and take your measurements."

Fuck off with that entirely and just track your fitness progress. You'll see week to week progression rather than unpredictable and chaotic fluctuations. This is actually pretty conventional advice but the fitness industry is still trying to reel us in with before and after pics all the damn time.

"Count calories, stop drinking, cut out X from your diet."

I'd recommend calorie counting in the short term to understand your diet better, but in the long term it's way too much of a faff and a stress. If you enjoy drinking do it on occasion and if you like X then eat X, just maybe not every day.

(I should note that being sub 12% bodyfat was never an interest of mine, though.)

"Don't get a personal trainer, most of them suck and aren't accredited."

PTs aren't qualified but random internet sages are?

Take all advice with a pinch of salt, but if a PT helps you because having someone tell you what to do in person is helpful then go for it. I got a lot of advice on how to fix my form but it wasn't until a PT was able to actually show me the difference that it helped.
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The overall point here isn't new: whatever you can actually adhere to in the long run is better than an optimal training program. I just didn't find many of the conventional routes to work for me.

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well then

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Guess it depends on the individual. My dad was a huge hardass so most of that advice worked for me because I'm disciplined.

But if you're the type of guy that can't stand the grind, then I guess yeah, go fuck around. Don't make it so hard that you want to quit.

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Why do you choose to be fit?

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Squall28 posted...

Guess it depends on the individual. My dad was a huge hardass so most of that advice worked for me because I'm disciplined.

But if you're the type of guy that can't stand the grind, then I guess yeah, go fuck around. Don't make it so hard that you want to quit.

I've found the psychology aspect of that quite interesting. To me the david goggins stuff doesn't ever feel motivating. On the other hand, a guy like Jeff Nippard talking about the science of muscle hypertrophy is very motivating.

Either way, I just need something that can slot into my life that doesn't take mental energy to do every day. I think that is the same for everyone.

MedeaLysistrata posted...

Why do you choose to be fit?

Health, mobility, so called "functional" strength and aesthetics. The order of importance of those things has definitely changed as I've gotten older. When I was younger being attractive seemed to be the only thing that mattered, but when I look at other people my age now I just feel kind of blessed that I can bound up a staircase, move around furniture or take part in an impromptu physical activity or sport without totally gassing out straight away.

Also it's fucking nice to be able to eat a piece of cake and not worry about whether I'll be wearing it around my waist as of next week. There's a lady at my office who likes to talk about how lucky I am to have a high metabolism, and I never quite have the heart to tell her that my metabolism looks like 6+ hours in the gym every week.

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What works best for me is doing it with someone. They motivate to get me off my ass

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Here's a secret:
"Most fitness advice isn't good advice, it's just something the fitness advice giver wants to say to feel better about themself."

Really the only true advice is you have to find more value in what you get out of engaging in fitness than what you get out of avoiding it. If you do, you'll keep doing it, if not, you won't. Sometimes forcing yourself to break the ice or take the first steps is enough to get you past that mental barrier, sometimes not. But people who exercise a lot don't have tons of willpower, they just find more value in exercise than they do in avoiding exercise.

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pinky0926 posted...

I've found the psychology aspect of that quite interesting. To me the david goggins stuff doesn't ever feel motivating. On the other hand, a guy like Jeff Nippard talking about the science of muscle hypertrophy is very motivating.

Either way, I just need something that can slot into my life that doesn't take mental energy to do every day. I think that is the same for everyone.

Oh I agree about Goggins and Nippard. I'd rather it be a measured approach than some emotional, pushing yourself to the limit thing.

But then, I also need a structured plan. I don't want to just go to the gym and fuck around. Much of the advice you listed in the op has been proven iirc, but if it makes you not want to go to the gym at all, then it's not valid for you.

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There is a huge attitude of if youre not maximizing gains then you're wasting your time. This is very incorrect for the average guy that's just trying to get in mildly good shape. This idea needs to fuck off. Not everyone's goals are the same.

Also, the concept that newbie gains has this weird arbitrary window of time where they just stop is incorrect. It's more that you have a window between out of shape and in okay shape where your body adapts very quickly. Its less based on time and more on ability level. Unless you're super old, you've got a lot of time to get there yet. Again, for a regular guy this doesn't matter.

Also, the weighing yourself thing. I weigh myself like 3 times a day and graph it in excel. It shows me a solid picture of overall progress and makes me very aware of natural fluctuations during a day. I like it much better than once a week where due to various reasons I might not be weighing myself at my lowest. I could work my ass off but see no results depending on hydration level snd stuff. I'd rather get an accurate picture.

The going to the gym and fucking around thing has some drawbacks tbh. It's a good way to create some injuries. Like if I decide I'm going to just do 500 curls with low weight everyday, there's a real chance that it can fuck up elbows and impede things long term. While you don't need to adhere to a strict routine to see some results, it's definitely not good to create injuries and imbalances.

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Squall28 posted...

Oh I agree about Goggins and Nippard. I'd rather it be a measured approach than some emotional, pushing yourself to the limit thing.

But then, I also need a structured plan. I don't want to just go to the gym and fuck around. Much of the advice you listed in the op has been proven iirc, but if it makes you not want to go to the gym at all, then it's not valid for you.

I definitely believe in a structured plan, but I think there's a time and a place for it. I would just argue that an absolute novice - like someone who doesn't even want to be in a gym - should just spend time getting used to it, rather than trying to stick to an intense and fairly complex PPL program from day dot or something. If it takes that guy a month or two to get used to the environment, feel like he belongs a little bit, understand how the equipment works and then starts to feel like he needs more progression - that's when the program comes into play.

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Guilt ends up being a big motivator in getting me to the gym.. I end up feeling like I let myself down if I skip days. But I've pretty much agreed with myself that I just need to get myself there. Even if I only spend 20 minutes and do 2 lifts, I just need to get myself there
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Jiek_Fafn posted...

There is a huge attitude of if youre not maximizing gains then you're wasting your time. This is very incorrect for the average guy that's just trying to get in mildly good shape. This idea needs to fuck off. Not everyone's goals are the same.

That attitude has the exact same people in its venn diagram as people who say the only way to train is with a barbell, too.

Also, the concept that newbie gains has this weird arbitrary window of time where they just stop is incorrect. It's more that you have a window between out of shape and in okay shape where your body adapts very quickly. Its less based on time and more on ability level. Unless you're super old, you've got a lot of time to get there yet. Again, for a regular guy this doesn't matter.

That one was a total eye opener for me, but at the same time the whole noob-gain-time--window never made any kind of fundamental sense so it always had me confused.

Also, the weighing yourself thing. I weigh myself like 3 times a day and graph it in excel. It shows me a solid picture of overall progress and makes me very aware of natural fluctuations during a day. I like it much better than once a week where due to various reasons I might not be weighing myself at my lowest. I could work my ass off but see no results depending on hydration level snd stuff. I'd rather get an accurate picture.

That sounds like a lot of work, but I suppose you get a pretty interesting graph after a month?

The going to the gym and fucking around thing has some drawbacks tbh. It's a good way to create some injuries. Like if I decide I'm going to just do 500 curls with low weight everyday, there's a real chance that it can fuck up elbows and impede things long term. While you don't need to adhere to a strict routine to see some results, it's definitely not good to create injuries and imbalances.

I suppose I had the benefit of having enough theoretical knowledge to start with to avoid some of those mistakes. I guess I would put in the caveat: go to the gym and fuck around, but if you can do more of 15 of something in one go then up the weight. And also don't do any big complicated lifts or heavy weights without checking in on the form.

I really don't think a noob has a huge risk of injury from trying to pull down 80lbs for a set of 10, though.


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emblem boy posted...

Guilt ends up being a big motivator in getting me to the gym.. I end up feeling like I let myself down if I skip days. But I've pretty much agreed with myself that I just need to get myself there. Even if I only spend 20 minutes and do 2 lifts, I just need to get myself there

Yeah, getting there is the thing isn't it? That's why I save the program commitments until I'm there. If I'm faced with the idea that I have 2 hours of heavy lifting to get through and each lift needs to be harder than it was last week, I might chicken out. On the other hand, if I just drive to the gym and sit down on a bench and then start thinking about what to do now that I'm there, it comes together.

Over time, that mental barrier diminishes.

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Jiek_Fafn posted...

There is a huge attitude of if youre not maximizing gains then you're wasting your time.

This ruined me for years. Hopping routines, worrying I was wasting my time

The REAL secret is every routine works

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most of the advice worked for me, Im just wired differently