Current Events > Girl: I don't want to lead you on but I'm just not interested

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clyde_frog
08/04/20 2:04:03 AM
#1:


Then why were you texting me all weekend? Why were you send me pics of you in real time? Why did you tell me my eyes are pretty? Why did you write oh you want me to help you control your stick? When I asked you to play video games? After that, why did you say you would let me smash after I let you win? Why did you ask me to shave my beard last night if you werent interested?

That video game discussion literally happened 24 hours ago. Tonight shes like I dont want to lead you on. This is why men on dating apps turn into fuckboys. Literally the one time Im not casually hitting up a girl and I actually want to take her on a date, she plays me like this.

I just need to breathe, but this one hurts for whatever reason.

Also PROTIP: This is why I try to meet a girl as soon as possible before she gets bored over text. I like to think Im a good texter, but this particular girl flipped a switch on me with no explanation. Covid is making this extra difficult, but if a girl doesnt have an opportunity to get to know you face to face, you run the risk of having this happen to you too.

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teepan95
08/04/20 2:08:10 AM
#2:


Some people are just naturally flirty

But yeah, that sounds rough TC. Don't give her the satisfaction of getting to you. Onwards and upwards
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KalimariX8
08/04/20 2:10:43 AM
#3:


At least she had the decency to tell you at all

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solosnake
08/04/20 2:11:12 AM
#4:


pics

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https://imgur.com/MYYEIx5 https://imgur.com/WGE12ef
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MrToothHasYou
08/04/20 2:11:52 AM
#5:


She found out you post on CE

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Returning_CEmen
08/04/20 2:13:01 AM
#6:


Women love attention
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clyde_frog
08/04/20 2:14:50 AM
#7:


KalimariX8 posted...
At least she had the decency to tell you at all

As opposed to what? She played me for an entire weekend. Theres no bright side to this.

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clyde_frog
08/04/20 2:15:19 AM
#8:


solosnake posted...
pics

Debating if I actually should

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clyde_frog
08/04/20 2:15:52 AM
#9:


MrToothHasYou posted...
She found out you post on CE

I actually laughed at this, thank you lol

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ColdOne666
08/04/20 2:16:33 AM
#10:


Posts the pics to get back at her.

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haloiscoolisbak
08/04/20 2:16:54 AM
#11:


Yeah that sounds rough as. Tbh i hate talking to 2 people at once for this reason. I'm not old fashioned i just think it leads to problems

I'm sure she was genuinely interested TC but was probably talking to another guy too and met him in person first

She should just say that though instead of this half truth

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Mr_Rian
08/04/20 2:17:52 AM
#12:


clyde_frog posted...
KalimariX8 posted...
At least she had the decency to tell you at all

As opposed to what? She played me for an entire weekend. Theres no bright side to this.

Ghosting you.
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clyde_frog
08/04/20 2:19:51 AM
#13:


I left out some key points that actually make this situation way worse.

-we matched on hinge on friday
-shes japanese but has never been to Japan. I said Ive always wanted to go as well, and we lightly joked that we should go together after the pandemic clears
-I mentioned that Im taking Japanese this fall for my foreign language credits and she responded with well I need a translator when I visit

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MrToothHasYou
08/04/20 2:20:15 AM
#14:


clyde_frog posted...
I actually laughed at this, thank you lol
lmao no worries man but real talk maybe you just said or did something that was a red flag for her. You probably use the same emojis as her toxic ex, who the fuck knows man. Bottom line is she told you it wasnt gonna happen and you can move on. Always look forward, king

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clyde_frog
08/04/20 2:21:52 AM
#15:


Mr_Rian posted...
Ghosting you.

Honestly both are pretty bad. But ghosting is pure evil if youve established a connection, so I suppose youre right.

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clyde_frog
08/04/20 2:22:34 AM
#16:


ColdOne666 posted...
Posts the pics to get back at her.

you guysssss

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Pitlord_Special
08/04/20 2:24:05 AM
#17:


Sounds like Chad hit her up and you got dropped like an ugly baby. Sorry to hear it but it happens to all of us playing the game.

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clyde_frog
08/04/20 2:28:53 AM
#18:


haloiscoolisbak posted...
Yeah that sounds rough as. Tbh i hate talking to 2 people at once for this reason. I'm not old fashioned i just think it leads to problems

I'm sure she was genuinely interested TC but was probably talking to another guy too and met him in person first

She should just say that though instead of this half truth

I mean to be real, I have a FWB, a girl Im kinda dating but its iffy on both ends (99% chance this doesn't work out and were both dating around), and talking to 2 other girls on Hinge, mixed with random conversations on Bumble. But its rare to find someone that I would be willing to date like this girl. For this girl I was putting in real effort and it completely backfired on me.

Guess I should stick to the heyy wyd messages as that seems to get me farther with girls than planning out cute dates.

I want an actual girlfriend but it has to be the right person. My intuition said this girl was that person, but then this happens.

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clyde_frog
08/04/20 2:30:32 AM
#19:


Pitlord_Special posted...
Sounds like Chad hit her up and you got dropped like an ugly baby. Sorry to hear it but it happens to all of us playing the game.

I am the Chad in most scenarios, but I turned into a sweet innocent Derrick for this girl.

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Gobstoppers12
08/04/20 2:34:37 AM
#20:


Conversation and flirting is one thing, but when it gets to a certain point you know whether or not you want to proceed. Looks like she felt you out, had a little fun, then decided you weren't her type.

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clyde_frog
08/04/20 2:44:08 AM
#21:


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Damn_Underscore
08/04/20 2:51:41 AM
#22:


that's the only pic?

it's difficult to say anything about her from that pic alone. But she doesn't seem like a good person tbh

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WaterLink
08/04/20 2:52:18 AM
#23:


Hey man real talk, I was on dating apps for a long time. And I do mean a long time. I never tried to get too serious mind you. But the beauty of online dating is, you can say "Ok, she didnt want me. On to the next" and then find the next person you chat with well.

I must have chatted with so many people that didn't lead anywhere at all. Days or weekends talking to someone and it just turned into thin air. Sometimes they'd ghost me, or I'd ghost them, or we'd wake up the next day and neither of us would message again so mutual ghosting lol. I went on dates that ended on first dates and didn't lead to anything. I've had a couple of first night hookups that ghosted afterwards. Ouch. Those TV tropes where the woman doesn't get a next phone call and the guy is a scumbag? Yeah thats happened to me multiple times that ain't a gender specific trait.

But the beauty of online dating is...you can just get to work on the next one. It's like speed dating without time limits or a bunch of other people in the room or being confined to chatting to one person at a time. In fact its nothing like speed dating at all but it kinda is.

But after probably 7 years of using these online dating apps, I think I've probably, and after much toiling, found someone I can see slending the rest of my life with. And what's funny is, beforehand we both agreed this would be a one time thing because she was leaving out of state for an entire month the next day when we happened to match and she wanted to get one last fling in and I was willing. But we had each others numbers. I was still matching with others but the text conversations we had while we were away were much more compelling. We ended up texting and talking and facetiming everyday while she was away. We unintentionally just fell in love over what was supposed to be a mutual one night fling. We had a ceremonious deletion of our dating apps together when we made it official, and now months later we're moving in together.

It hits you when you don't expect it man so if there's a moral to my rambling story is that if someone ghosts you, she wasnt the right one. Or she wasnt about you. Word. Find someone that is about you and don't cry about it when they aren't because they gave you a very easy bullet to dodge.
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Gobstoppers12
08/04/20 3:00:34 AM
#24:


why does it look like she has gigantic monster feet dude

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HighOnSolar
08/04/20 3:02:45 AM
#25:


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clyde_frog
08/04/20 3:08:30 AM
#26:


WaterLink posted...
Hey man real talk, I was on dating apps for a long time. And I do mean a long time. I never tried to get too serious mind you. But the beauty of online dating is, you can say "Ok, she didnt want me. On to the next" and then find the next person you chat with well.

I must have chatted with so many people that didn't lead anywhere at all. Days or weekends talking to someone and it just turned into thin air. Sometimes they'd ghost me, or I'd ghost them, or we'd wake up the next day and neither of us would message again so mutual ghosting lol. I went on dates that ended on first dates and didn't lead to anything. I've had a couple of first night hookups that ghosted afterwards. Ouch. Those TV tropes where the woman doesn't get a next phone call and the guy is a scumbag? Yeah thats happened to me multiple times that ain't a gender specific trait.

But the beauty of online dating is...you can just get to work on the next one. It's like speed dating without time limits or a bunch of other people in the room or being confined to chatting to one person at a time. In fact its nothing like speed dating at all but it kinda is.

But after probably 7 years of using these online dating apps, I think I've probably, and after much toiling, found someone I can see slending the rest of my life with. And what's funny is, beforehand we both agreed this would be a one time thing because she was leaving out of state for an entire month the next day when we happened to match and she wanted to get one last fling in and I was willing. But we had each others numbers. I was still matching with others but the text conversations we had while we were away were much more compelling. We ended up texting and talking and facetiming everyday while she was away. We unintentionally just fell in love over what was supposed to be a mutual one night fling. We had a ceremonious deletion of our dating apps together when we made it official, and now months later we're moving in together.

It hits you when you don't expect it man so if there's a moral to my rambling story is that if someone ghosts you, she wasnt the right one. Or she wasnt about you. Word. Find someone that is about you and don't cry about it when they aren't because they gave you a very easy bullet to dodge.

Duuuuude. A similar scenario happened with my ex and I, except I was one leaving out of town after we just met. We hooked up twice immediately after meeting off bumble and we texted nonstop while I was out of state, although it was only for a week. That developed into a year and a half relationship.

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clyde_frog
08/04/20 3:09:02 AM
#27:


Gobstoppers12 posted...
why does it look like she has gigantic monster feet dude

holy shit I just noticed

HighOnSolar posted...
https://youtu.be/cCYNoW495og

hahahahhahaha


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clyde_frog
08/04/20 3:10:21 AM
#28:




her face kinda cute though

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gunplagirl
08/04/20 3:16:01 AM
#29:


Gobstoppers12 posted...
Conversation and flirting is one thing, but when it gets to a certain point you know whether or not you want to proceed. Looks like she felt you out, had a little fun, then decided you weren't her type.
Yep. Hell, I flirt all the time with friends on Facebook, doesn't mean I'd ever go on a date with them.

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MrToothHasYou
08/04/20 3:32:11 AM
#30:


clyde_frog posted...
heres a pic I guess
Yeesh. Not a king move my friend, looks like she was right to pass

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WaterLink
08/04/20 3:32:25 AM
#31:


clyde_frog posted...
Duuuuude. A similar scenario happened with my ex and I, except I was one leaving out of town after we just met. We hooked up twice immediately after meeting off bumble and we texted nonstop while I was out of state, although it was only for a week. That developed into a year and a half relationship.

That shit's crazy man! But then you should know then that if someone ghosts you or "leads you on" then it's move on time. I know it's easier said than done for a lot of people, especially if they're someone inexperienced, they think the first person that wants to fuck them twice and sober the 2nd time around is their soulmate simply because of that.

But to me, leading me on and ghosting me is the least of anyone's problems in online dating. You send them a couple of messages and if they don't respond, then it's move on time. Hell sometimes I specifically became more active after a ghosting just to see if I could land someone just for the off chance that the other person would message me again just so I could say I moved on. It wasn't something I'm proud of and I didn't just get with anyone but I'd be lying if I didn't say it didn't motivate me sometimes.

But I guess different people have different mindsets. I can understand how it can be frustrating and sometimes it can be humiliating and make you want to drop out of the game but you can't fall into that trap. For so many reasons. Just gotta keep on keeping on. That's one thing that doesn't get talked about enough as men, we have to face outright rejection a lot more and on top of it we have to get over it and get the courage to keep trying.

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lincoln002
08/04/20 3:39:23 AM
#32:


clyde_frog posted...
As opposed to what? She played me for an entire weekend. Theres no bright side to this.

Wow, you invested a whole weekend! Oh my lord, a whole weekend of texting! How awful!

Brother, that was just some random chick, there's nothing to be upset about. I feel you though, that was some blue balling scumbag move on her part after giving you the OK to hit. Makes me wonder if you're a shady character in real life, most of the time there is a reason we attract the type of women we attract.

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clyde_frog
08/04/20 3:54:48 AM
#33:


lincoln002 posted...
Wow, you invested a whole weekend! Oh my lord, a whole weekend of texting! How awful!

Brother, that was just some random chick, there's nothing to be upset about. I feel you though, that was some blue balling scumbag move on her part after giving you the OK to hit. Makes me wonder if you're a shady character in real life, most of the time there is a reason we attract the type of women we attract.

Ok didnt need the shitty sarcasm bud. This topic was actually uplifting and helping me get over this bump in the road, yet here you come spreading youre pointless negativity.

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clyde_frog
08/04/20 4:10:52 AM
#34:


For the rest of you peeps, Im really thankful for your input and support. I know Im being irrationally emotional about this so thank you for making me realize that.

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NES4EVER
08/04/20 4:15:28 AM
#35:


My response: Ok good to know. Take care

Then just move on.

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SomeLikeItHoth
08/04/20 4:43:05 AM
#36:


She's probably showing all her friends y'alls texts. Just stop replying to her dude.

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CagingElephants
08/04/20 4:45:29 AM
#37:


Pass her my way, TC. Ill show her what a real man is.
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AirFresh
08/04/20 4:50:48 AM
#38:


Looks like you dodged a bullet TC tbh

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pinky0926
08/04/20 5:02:16 AM
#39:


It hurts to get rejected OP but don't go down the red pill and revenge porn path, not cool. Just be a bigger man.

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Ilishe
08/04/20 5:07:02 AM
#40:


She found someone else

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#41
Post #41 was unavailable or deleted.
spikethedevil
08/04/20 5:12:27 AM
#42:


Apparently the last poster blocked me lol.

Yea posting pics of her without her permission is a really shitty thing to do and kinda auto makes you the bad guy i personally would delete those messages with her pics in.

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clyde_frog
08/04/20 9:55:45 AM
#43:


jeffhardyb0yz posted...
You dont need to get her out as fast as possible(I mean thats ideal) but getting her on the phone/FaceTime so she can hear you.

also, you guys had all these different discussions before ever even meeting. You killed the mystery/interest

Well thats the thing. I purposely avoided any discussions that involved us exchanging any meaningful information. So that means we didnt talk about school, work life, daily routines, etc. It was just surface level, in the moment, kind of talks, if that makes sense.

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clyde_frog
08/04/20 9:56:24 AM
#44:


spikethedevil posted...
Apparently the last poster blocked me lol.

Yea posting pics of her without her permission is a really shitty thing to do and kinda auto makes you the bad guy i personally would delete those messages with her pics in.

Youre right, I was just trying to please CE. I deleted them.

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TommyG663513
08/04/20 9:57:39 AM
#45:


KalimariX8 posted...
At least she had the decency to tell you at all

This. Most won't even pretend to care. Rejection sucks, but this is as good as rejection gets.

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#46
Post #46 was unavailable or deleted.
Platoe
08/04/20 10:04:13 AM
#47:


Don't post her pic wtf. Just ghost her dude it's not hard
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Eliza-Schuyler
08/04/20 10:04:49 AM
#48:


deal with it. there are plenty of other people out there! dont waste your time with one person!

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philsov
08/04/20 10:09:36 AM
#49:


clyde_frog posted...


Youre right, I was just trying to please CE. I deleted them.


PICS?!? is the meme response for any topic about misc girls (or sometimes even random boys)

From the sounds of it, you played your cards right enough. Going straight to meetup instead of just random texting is better than it's not, and there was a proper level of flirt. She found something shinier or she was worried about covid or something. IDK. Either way, it's not your fault.

How much beard did you lose?
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ZeroX91
08/04/20 10:11:38 AM
#50:


https://youtu.be/BFkLxF4MEgI

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