Poll of the Day > I'm too afraid to ask out girls.

(+) Yeah! (+)

It's a deathly fear. I have it typed up ready to send on Facebook, and I can't bring myself to press the enter button.

How hard is it to push a key on a keyboard? For me, very hard. I won't type anything else until I push that enter key.

Why am I so afraid of this? It's been two hours... Last time I did I was depressed for 3 years. It would make sense that I never did it again.

All I have to do is press that enter button. My willpower is a joke. She's going to think I don't care and find someone else.

Ok, I'm pushing that fucking button. I'm not ready, and I never will be.

Let me list all the reasons why I shouldn't push this button, right now;
1) nothing
2) SO's are like pets, and you have to pay attention to them.
3) My rejection based depression manifests as unrelenting physical pain

I've made bad decisions before, just for the hell of it? There's nothing to be afraid of here... the timing is fine... what if she ignores my message? I'll never sleep... I might not sleep for days.

I almost clicked it right there. It's just a fucking button. Then again, some buttons launch nukes.

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just do it >.>

Yellow posted...

SO's are like pets

???
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It's a weird analogy, but it makes sense to me. It means I'd have to go out of my way to maintain this relationship for the rest of my life.

And I'm a really anti-social person. I post on here because I don't want any real friends. I don't even really become friends with people here.

But I guess I have made irl friends, and they aren't so bad...

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Not to mention... doesnt it say youre typing on her end while you have chars typed up?
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Just do it, ask every woman you see out, doesn't matter if you find them attractive. The more you do it the easier it is. Plus with all that experience, when you find the one you DO want to ask out it will be so easy.

Social skills are just like everything else, they have to be honed.
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Yellow posted...

It's a deathly fear. I have it typed up ready to send on Facebook, and I can't bring myself to press the enter button.

How hard is it to push a key on a keyboard? For me, very hard. I won't type anything else until I push that enter key.

Why am I so afraid of this? It's been two hours... Last time I did I was depressed for 3 years. It would make sense that I never did it again.

All I have to do is press that enter button. My willpower is a joke. She's going to think I don't care and find someone else.

Ok, I'm pushing that fucking button. I'm not ready, and I never will be.

Let me list all the reasons why I shouldn't push this button, right now;
1) nothing
2) SO's are like pets, and you have to pay attention to them.
3) My rejection based depression manifests as unrelenting physical pain

I've made bad decisions before, just for the hell of it? There's nothing to be afraid of here... the timing is fine... what if she ignores my message? I'll never sleep... I might not sleep for days.

I almost clicked it right there. It's just a fucking button. Then again, some buttons launch nukes.

Who cares if she doesn't reply back.. just try again with another girl you like. Even 10/10 men get rejected. If you don't try you will forever be alone and a virgin for life. If that bugs you then go for it. You will get better and better at conversations as you go.

And sent...

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Kids these days... back in my day, you either asked them out in person or you had to call her house and hope she was the one who picked up the phone first!
D:<
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Sometimes I feel like exploding when Su Roas is in close range...
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Im 31 and Ive had nothing but bad experiences when it comes to dating. Its honestly to the point where I think theres either something really wrong with me or Im just not meant to be in a relationship.

Id be ok with it if like it was a mix of good and bad, but, nope, its all been misery.

So, I totally get it lol.
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Yellow posted...

It's a deathly fear. I have it typed up ready to send on Facebook, and I can't bring myself to press the enter button.

How hard is it to push a key on a keyboard? For me, very hard. I won't type anything else until I push that enter key.

Why am I so afraid of this? It's been two hours... Last time I did I was depressed for 3 years. It would make sense that I never did it again.

All I have to do is press that enter button. My willpower is a joke. She's going to think I don't care and find someone else.

Ok, I'm pushing that fucking button. I'm not ready, and I never will be.

Let me list all the reasons why I shouldn't push this button, right now;
1) nothing
2) SO's are like pets, and you have to pay attention to them.
3) My rejection based depression manifests as unrelenting physical pain

I've made bad decisions before, just for the hell of it? There's nothing to be afraid of here... the timing is fine... what if she ignores my message? I'll never sleep... I might not sleep for days.

I almost clicked it right there. It's just a fucking button. Then again, some buttons launch nukes.

You think you got reasons to be depressed? I'm 47 years old and I've been rejected all my life. I'm the living sequel to the 40 year old virgin and all I'm going to say is try,don't be afraid and hold yourself back.
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You guys can always try felon dating. I almost resorted to that once after online dating was such a disaster.

Just avoid the violent ones.

Remember this, Yellow...

Theyre more afraid of you than you are of them.
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Dang, there are dating apps now, guys. It's super easy. Don't think too much about it, get some good pictures, and be prepared for hundreds of rejections.
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my recommendation is to definitely try. couple reasons:

- if you think it's hard now, wait till you're too old. make a move while you're still in the right age range.

- getting a rejection is, I think, a healthy thing to do. it lets you burn that bridge in your mind, rather than letting it grow. if you don't have chance, you should find out sooner rather than later and move on, rather than wasting time thinking about it.
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If at first you don't succeed, try, try again.
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Yellow posted...

I almost clicked it right there. It's just a fucking button. Then again, some buttons launch nukes.

Jesus, dude, did this sound poetic in your head or what

Just have a go. What's the worse that can happen? (realistically)

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Dont send a message online. Charm them like a fat girl and youll do fine.

bro, if internet explorer can ask if you want to make it your default browser you can ask a girl out

if winrar can tell you that your trial is over and its time to buy winrar you can ask a girl out

look at it this way. if the universe ends in heat death nothing is gonna matter anyways, and nobody is gonna remember your fuckups.
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Yellow posted...

I have it typed up ready to send on Facebook, and I can't bring myself to press the enter button.

See face to face I may get being nervous however online? Not so much. Even more so on dating apps where nobody actually cares about being rejected and those apps are a cesspool of potential dates, fucks and whatever. Feel the fear but do it anyway I guess?

Edit:
Yellow posted...

And sent...

Ah. My bad.
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She replied...

"Hell yeah!"

:)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKiO37AdNa4" data-time="

HornedLion posted...

Remember this, Yellow...

Theyre more afraid of you than you are of them.

I hope not.

CTLM posted...

You guys can always try felon dating. I almost resorted to that once after online dating was such a disaster.

Just avoid the violent ones.

That's not a bad idea, tbh. Dating apps are super weighted towards straight women. And even then most of the guys are players. Felons aren't necessarily bad people.

Sahuagin posted...

my recommendation is to definitely try. couple reasons:

- if you think it's hard now, wait till you're too old. make a move while you're still in the right age range.

- getting a rejection is, I think, a healthy thing to do. it lets you burn that bridge in your mind, rather than letting it grow. if you don't have chance, you should find out sooner rather than later and move on, rather than wasting time thinking about it.

This was exactly my thought process. I was constantly worrying that everyone found someone already, and hitting 25 in a couple months made me freak out. I've literally put off finding a higher paying job because I think it's easier meeting girls working in a grocery store. And it worked.

I heard that the majority of people that don't lose their virginity by 20 keep it until 40, so I made sure I tried my hardest to go against that trend and break out of my shell before I had no choice.

SunWuKung420 posted...

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again.

On a new one, you rarely change in attractiveness in another person's opinion.

JoseAAV posted...

Dont send a message online. Charm them like a fat girl and youll do fine.

I assume that online messaging just makes everything easier for everyone involved, if not as classy.

Cacciato posted...

Jesus, dude, did this sound poetic in your head or what

Not really. I was just blurting things on the page and I haphazardly posted it because I was nervous.

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Yellow posted...

And sent...

What did you say to her?
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HornedLion posted...

Remember this, Yellow...

Theyre more afraid of you than you are of them.

No we're not
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SusanGreenEyes posted...

What did you say to her?

"Hey Molly, do you want to go out with me sometime?"

Then a half hour later she replied "Hell yeah!", so I pretended to be asleep and went to bed.

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Nice, don't be too fucking weird and scare her away once you actually hang out.

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Just stare at her, stroke her hair a little while whispering "soon" to yourself over and over.
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The worst thing they can say is "No." You're not going to die.
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Yeah, you dont even have to ask her out like "WILL YOU GO OUT WITH ME" girls can sense the desperation there. Just be like "hey have you seen the new fast and the furious movie? No? I was gonna go this weekend, you wanna go?"

If she says no then just play it off like "ok ya no worries"

And then life goes on

It's desperation just asking someone out? I thought that's just getting right to the point.
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No use, she hasn't replied to me all day.

Idk what "Hell yeah!" means, I guess.

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Congrats! You need to establish a day, time, and place! What are your plans? What do you want to do?
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I'm afraid to pet tigers. Your fear is not unfounded.

Okay if a guy with mild autism (me) can learn social skills and learn to ask out girls, so can you.

First you have to have some social skills. Go on youtube and watch some charisma on command or similar channels. Theres a lot to learn online, just study for it like you would a test and practice it.

Second thing is if you are afraid of being rejected, chance is the girl isnt going to say yes.
That because you need a different mindset, you cant just approach girls based on their looks.
If you want to get to know a girl for real then just start by waving to her everyday (while smiling), slowly upgrade to actually saying hello. Then when you are comfortable ask them how their shift was (assuming a work situation). This is where social skills come in, you need to learn when someone is interested in talking to you or not. Up to this point you should still be treating this (and other girls) like they are your male coworkers (whom you have a similar *familiarity level with).

*=How well you know that person. Relationships with all people are kind of like video games, you have to level them up. For example you wouldnt ask a male co-worker to join you for bowling if you have only talked several times, its the same for a female coworker, its WEIRD.
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Good advice, ok?
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What does facebook and pushing a button have to do with talking to women? Your vocal Cords process air in amazing vocal patterns. Use em. Worst they can say is no....
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deoxxys posted...

Okay if a guy with mild autism (me) can learn social skills and learn to ask out girls, so can you.

First you have to have some social skills. Go on youtube and watch some charisma on command or similar channels. Theres a lot to learn online, just study for it like you would a test and practice it.

Second thing is if you are afraid of being rejected, chance is the girl isnt going to say yes.
Thats because you need a different mindset, you cant just approach girls based on their looks.
If you want to get to know a girl for real then just start by waving to her everyday (while smiling), slowly upgrade to actually saying hello. Then when you are comfortable ask them how their shift was (assuming a work situation). This is where social skills come in, you need to learn when someone is interested in talking to you or not. Up to this point you should still be treating this (and other girls) like they are your male coworkers (whom you have a similar *familiarity level with).

*=How well you know that person. Relationships with all people are kind of like video games, you have to level them up. For example you wouldnt ask a male co-worker to join you for bowling if you have only talked several times, its the same for a female coworker, its WEIRD.

Or just find a steetcorner get a soapbox and start telling real people what you really think. :) I'd put a 5er in yer cup already.

Lol I Gotta check a box to post this, feels like a free speech trap
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This topic made me realize that Im fine with where Im at lol. Nice going Yellow!
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ferko420 posted...

What does facebook and pushing a button have to do with talking to women?

You're asking this while posting on a forum. Don't be so obtuse.
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wwinterj25 posted...

ferko420 posted...

What does facebook and pushing a button have to do with talking to women?

You're asking this while posting on a forum. Don't be so obtuse.

Bah, I know yer age and we both used icq... Internet chats is not sub for social interaction, hell my irc channels used to have meetups.

TC. Become a drunk and get into bars, or pretend to drink till you get caught...
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It's not over for folk like me...

It never began in the first place
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ferko420 posted...

Internet chats is not sub for social interaction

Internet chats however can lead to real life.
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wwinterj25 posted...

Internet chats however can lead to real life.

Yeah lol, just how he mentioned in post #40

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jramirez23 posted...

Yeah lol, just how he mentioned in post #40

Just pointing out the contradiction.
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All these "worst she can say is no" people have clearly never had a woman scream at them, mace them in the face, and file a restraining order against them.
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Was that when she said yes or?
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Zareth posted...

All these "worst she can say is no" people have clearly never had a woman scream at them, mace them in the face, and file a restraining order against them.

This sounds like an exaggeration to me. But it reminds me of the creepy-guy factor that comes into play if you blindly go about trying to ask a woman out at the gym. Im not super socially successful myself but from the looks of it, this situation requires so much patience and tact compared to just about any other setting.

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"Worst thing that can happen is shs says no?" Hell no dude, the worst thing that can happen is she says yes and then we go out and i have to figure out how to hold a conversation but i cant so we just sit there and kind of awkwardly say a few things here and there

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Greenfox111 posted...

"Worst thing that can happen is shs says no?" Hell no dude, the worst thing that can happen is she says yes and then we go out and i have to figure out how to hold a conversation but i cant so we just sit there and kind of awkwardly say a few things here and there

Which is point in time to just whip it out and see where it goes, she's already awkwardly sitting in a room with you already.... Maybe not whip it out but make a move if there's nothing to say make out.... Shessh WTF did you do in high school?
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SunWuKung420 posted...

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again.

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