Poll of the Day > Thinking of telling my friend I'm a gay tomorrow

(+) Yeah! (+)

Nervous, but I kind of want to tell him. I told a couple friends recently and it turned out okay. I hope it doesn't change how he sees me too much. I actually really like him but I probably won't tell him that part. He's pretty open minded so I don't think he'd care that much. I wonder what he'd say though if he knew I wanted to sick his duck, as it were lol
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That is exactly what I plan on saying thanks
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Good luck!
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AnnoyedCops posted...

I wonder what he'd say though if he knew I wanted to sick his duck, as it were lol

oh ok, it's not as simple as an average coming out... you have alternate intentions. can't see how this could go wrong, ok?
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Aculo posted...

AnnoyedCops posted...

I wonder what he'd say though if he knew I wanted to sick his duck, as it were lol

oh ok, it's not as simple as an average coming out... you have alternate intentions. can't see how this could go wrong, ok?

I won't say anything about that I think unless he asks me. I was just saying I wonder what he would think
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AnnoyedCops posted...

Aculo posted...

AnnoyedCops posted...

I wonder what he'd say though if he knew I wanted to sick his duck, as it were lol

oh ok, it's not as simple as an average coming out... you have alternate intentions. can't see how this could go wrong, ok?

I won't say anything about that I think unless he asks me. I was just saying I wonder what he would think

oh ok, gotcha. well then good luck to you, ok?
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I remember when I told my friends. It worked out...
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Often the prison in your own mind is more difficult than the actual reality as you'll always be thinking "what if?". Chances are it won't change anything between you although I'm not sure why you have to tell him at all. Anyone I've met who is gay or bi just make comments about blokes/gals they like and nobody bats a eyelid as most folk don't care. The only time sexuality is relevant if if you're hitting on someone from the top of my head. As for actually hitting on your mate, unless he's gave hints he's interested in blokes I wouldn't advise it.
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It sounds like you already told some of your friends, and then nothing bad happened. What makes you think this will be anything different?
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shadowsword87 posted...

It sounds like you already told some of your friends, and then nothing bad happened. What makes you think this will be anything different?

Nothing I guess. It's just always a fear I have
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AnnoyedCops posted...

shadowsword87 posted...

It sounds like you already told some of your friends, and then nothing bad happened. What makes you think this will be anything different?

Nothing I guess. It's just always a fear I have

I felt like that, too. Most of my female friends were really easy to tell. It was much harder for my best male friend. But he took it well. It should be fine.
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AnnoyedCops posted...

Thinking of telling my friend I'm a gay tomorrow

*Scary noises*

Nervous, but I kind of want to tell him. I told a couple friends recently and it turned out okay. I hope it doesn't change how he sees me too much. I actually really like him but I probably won't tell him that part. He's pretty open minded so I don't think he'd care that much.

You seem to understand him enough to know what to do. I would not advise it because...

I wonder what he'd say though if he knew I wanted to sick his duck, as it were lol

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SMQLqTsWLUw" data-time="
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let us know if the sex happens
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Just don't do it like they did in season 5 episode 1 of Black Mirror.
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Nade Duck posted...

let us know if the sex happens

Yeah but don't count on it. Something like 5% of men are gay.
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Just tell him you're gay. Telling him you're "a gay" will make you sound like an old bigot dude from the 50's.
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I know nothing's going to happen. Pretty sure I won't mention anything about liking him or anything like that

wolfy42 posted...

Just don't do it like they did in season 5 episode 1 of Black Mirror.

Lol I just watched that one.
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Coming out is always hard, even if you know they're okay with it. There's always that feeling that they'll end up hating you after you tell them.

wolfy42 posted...

spoilers

I just started watching that, you're an asshole.

Cruddy_horse posted...

Coming out is always hard, even if you know they're okay with it. There's always that feeling that they'll end up hating you after you tell them.

wolfy42 posted...

spoilers

I just started watching that, you're an asshole.

Lol, it's not even spoilers, watch the whole thing.
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In a lot of instances, I doubt peoples' friends or family are shocked. They probably often already suspect it. I knew a guy that was very obviously in the closet, but I didn't feel like it was my place to be like "dude, you gay?". Thinking back to the amount of people in high school that denied being gay and later came out, I think they just didn't realize how much it was telegraphed. The only time I saw anyone using "you're gay" in the pejorative sense was between straight people. Nobody hassled the kids they thought were actually gay. That doesn't make it totally fine, but I'm just saying.

Nobody has ever come out to me directly, but if they did I'd just be like "cool. Respect for opening up."

Valiant_Kaiser posted...

In a lot of instances, I doubt peoples' friends or family are shocked. They probably often already suspect it. I knew a guy that was very obviously in the closet, but I didn't feel like it was my place to be like "dude, you gay?". Thinking back to the amount of people in high school that denied being gay and later came out, I think they just didn't realize how much it was telegraphed. The only time I saw anyone using "you're gay" in the pejorative sense was between straight people. Nobody hassled the kids they thought were actually gay. That doesn't make it totally fine, but I'm just saying.

Nobody has ever come out to me directly, but if they did I'd just be like "cool. Respect for opening up."

Actually, weirdly enough, its harder to tell with people who are closer to you... Thats what Ive noticed, at least...
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Just start sending dick picks to him.
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I told him. He reacted really well. He said it wouldn't change anything and thanks for trusting him to tell him. I almost didn't tell him. I was so nervous. I actually started to cry a little bit silently from his reaction. I guess it was partly the feeling that I couldn't go back now and also just being relieved at his reaction. Didn't mention anything about liking him and I think I won't. Maybe he already knows, who knows. I asked if he already knew I was gay. He said he had a suspicion. I'm still crying now. I'm not even sure why. He sent me a really nice follow up text. I guess I'm relieved or something. I don't know. And I'm so appreciative to have a friend like him
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Congrats on the sex.
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Congrats on it going well. I would advise against telling him you like him. If he likes you, he'll tell you.
I made that mistake. It made things with my best friend very awkward for a while, but we're still best friends more than 10 years later.
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Zareth posted...

Just tell him you're gay. Telling him you're "a gay" will make you sound like an old bigot dude from the 50's.

Unless he says it with an Italian accent. Then it's okay.
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Don't worry guys, I said it in an Italian accent
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Thank-a God!
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Just tomorrow?
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AnnoyedCops posted...

I actually started to cry a little bit silently from his reaction.

That sounds like a gay thing to do.

Just messing around, congrats on it going well.

LinkPizza posted...

I remember when I told my friends. It worked out...

Mine acted like they where gonna jump me. I didnt come out to them though my brother told them and they asked me to follow them down this dark fucking road nobody lived on then asked me. I still think the only reason at least one of them didnt attack me is cause I didnt answer with a yes or no. I took my jacket off and put up my hands and said lets get this over with. I mean everything about the scenario screamed to me they planned on jumping me if i said yes

In hindsight i think it was only one of theirs idea and the other just followed along out of curiosity. Hes still my best friend.
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eli_loves_ddr posted...

Congrats on it going well. I would advise against telling him you like him. If he likes you, he'll tell you.
I made that mistake. It made things with my best friend very awkward for a while, but we're still best friends more than 10 years later.

I told mine and it didnt effect much then again I'm not exactly the first guy to hit on him. Hes actually been a wing man of sorts thanks to that. Dude hits on him he says no thanks im straight but my friend here...
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mooreandrew58 posted...

LinkPizza posted...

I remember when I told my friends. It worked out...

Mine acted like they where gonna jump me. I didnt come out to them though my brother told them and they asked me to follow them down this dark fucking road nobody lived on then asked me. I still think the only reason at least one of them didnt attack me is cause I didnt answer with a yes or no. I took my jacket off and put up my hands and said lets get this over with. I mean everything about the scenario screamed to me they planned on jumping me if i said yes

In hindsight i think it was only one of theirs idea and the other just followed along out of curiosity. Hes still my best friend.

Most of my friends (including my best female friend) were shocked. And then started asking what I thought about certain guys. And things were just normal after that. My best male friend took it well, too. I was kind of nervous about telling him. I was over his house in the basement living room area, and he was in my room. I was texting my friends in my city that knew already and trying to tell him. I ended up sending him like a long text from the other room. But it was back when text had like a certain character limit. And it broke into 3 text... that were out of order. So, he was confused at first. Then finally understood. And then we talked about it for a while. Then it was all normal again. When I went to a close friends wedding some years back, he even asked me what I thought of a few guys there. Haha.
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How does one become a gay? Is it anything like a 12 step program?
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LinkPizza posted...

mooreandrew58 posted...

LinkPizza posted...

I remember when I told my friends. It worked out...

Mine acted like they where gonna jump me. I didnt come out to them though my brother told them and they asked me to follow them down this dark fucking road nobody lived on then asked me. I still think the only reason at least one of them didnt attack me is cause I didnt answer with a yes or no. I took my jacket off and put up my hands and said lets get this over with. I mean everything about the scenario screamed to me they planned on jumping me if i said yes

In hindsight i think it was only one of theirs idea and the other just followed along out of curiosity. Hes still my best friend.

Most of my friends (including my best female friend) were shocked. And then started asking what I thought about certain guys. And things were just normal after that. My best male friend took it well, too. I was kind of nervous about telling him. I was over his house in the basement living room area, and he was in my room. I was texting my friends in my city that knew already and trying to tell him. I ended up sending him like a long text from the other room. But it was back when text had like a certain character limit. And it broke into 3 text... that were out of order. So, he was confused at first. Then finally understood. And then we talked about it for a while. Then it was all normal again. When I went to a close friends wedding some years back, he even asked me what I thought of a few guys there. Haha.

I live in thee south and grew up in a trailer park so i was always uneasy about coming out. Im still uneasy about being open to the public. Basically I go with what my mom said. Come out of the closet but its fine to stay in your room. In other words only tell people you trust enough to willingly invite into your room

My best friend never really asks me about what I think of guys though other than once in awhile making a crude joke.
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mooreandrew58 posted...

LinkPizza posted...

I remember when I told my friends. It worked out...

Mine acted like they where gonna jump me. I didnt come out to them though my brother told them and they asked me to follow them down this dark fucking road nobody lived on then asked me. I still think the only reason at least one of them didnt attack me is cause I didnt answer with a yes or no. I took my jacket off and put up my hands and said lets get this over with. I mean everything about the scenario screamed to me they planned on jumping me if i said yes

In hindsight i think it was only one of theirs idea and the other just followed along out of curiosity. Hes still my best friend.

Wow that sounds really scary. Glad mine didn't go down like that.

Blorfenburger posted...

How does one become a gay? Is it anything like a 12 step program?

It's pretty similar but it has more steps
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AnnoyedCops posted...

Wow that sounds really scary. Glad mine didn't go down like that.

Yeah and the guy ive been talking to and potentionally going to date doesnt get why or like the fact I dont like being blatantly open. Keep saying "its 2019" as if that makes 100% ok. That wasnt the only time I felt threatned over it. Most usually I lie about it. But chose not to with my friends because I figured why be friends with people that wouldnt accept me.
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