Current Events > Jesus christ, why is scheduling an online date with women is always a nightmare?

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Muffinz0rz
08/27/18 9:09:56 PM
#1:


80/80

Now I'm no Chad, so I'm adjusting my standards accordingly.

Thing is, I have no problem getting the matches, striking up the conversations, talking, and smoothly transitioning into a first meeting. Options are generally more festive than the basic "let's get a drink!" (things like baseball games, state fair, walking around somewhere while it's still nice, etc.)

And they'll say yes! The problem is like okay what's next:

Awesome, how about we do Friday?
-Nope, sorry, can't
No worries how bout Saturday?
-Nope, sorry, can't
No worries how bout a weekday sometime next week after work?
-Nope, sorry, can't

It's like pulling teeth. And half the time, I fucking get the phone numbers too, it's not like this is just over the app. But still, nothing. So I eventually have to stop because I don't want my first impression to be "oh yeah this is the guy who bugged me for weeks until I finally gave in and went out for a bit"

But like I get it, people are busy. I'm not ripping anyone for having to babysit their nieces or getting ready for semester to start or spending time with family or any shit like that. But my issue with all this is the fact that they never counter-pose a suggested time/place. I have to be the one posing the date, time, activity, location, transportation if necessary, all of it. And if I stop, they stop and the whole thing is dead.

I honestly think part of the problem is that I'm too free; my social calendar is wide open weekends and I work 9-5 so I'm generally free every weekday after like 530-6. So that should be easy for them, right? Just pick a day and there's a 99% chance I'll be game. I do think there is some merit to the tactic of locking down a specific date and time, as opposed to "oh let's just wing it and we'll figure it out later." -- it puts them in a position where they at least have to say yes or no. But after a few days and times get shot down, I go for the whole "okay what works for you then" angle, and at that point they revert to the "we'll figure it out later I'm super busy right now" or whatever noise.

Am I the only one who finds this part of online dating particularly frustrating?
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Burgess
08/27/18 9:10:23 PM
#2:


They're dodging you.
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AlephZero
08/27/18 9:10:57 PM
#3:


the average man is unfuckable

the average woman gets blasted by limitless chad dick
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rodu_jr
08/27/18 9:11:27 PM
#4:


Muffinz0rz posted...
Awesome, how about we do Friday?
-Nope, sorry, can't
No worries how bout Saturday?
-Nope, sorry, can't
No worries how bout a weekday sometime next week after work?
-Nope, sorry, can't


that's when you move on
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Ultima Dragon
08/27/18 9:12:43 PM
#5:


Most women are extremely flaky. It was like this even before online dating. I've gotten plenty of girls numbers at school or work or wherever I happened to be, talked to them, plans were always made on both sides but nothing ever materializes.

It's funny because a lot of the time they're even the ones to bring up going out in the first place.
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Lunar_Savage
08/27/18 9:15:11 PM
#6:


It gets harder when you don't work 9-5.

But one of the main reasons they dodge an immediate appointed time after saying yes is because they have to confirm with their friends/family/important people on when and where they'll be and if it's okay. Safety first. You're not just being screened by her, but everyone else in her life too. Does it suck? Yeah. But, safety.

Edit: but yeah, what everyone else said is true too. Move on.
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No_U_L7
08/27/18 9:15:42 PM
#7:


Do you actually want help? The solution is actually quite simple
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Coolppl Owns
08/27/18 9:21:13 PM
#8:


if a woman wants to see you they will make time to see you

if you ask her out and she says she's busy but she doesn't give you an alternative time, she's most likely not interested and i wouldn't even bother asking her out again
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rodu_jr
08/27/18 9:23:44 PM
#9:


anything that isn't a yes, is normally a no
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No_U_L7
08/27/18 9:25:18 PM
#10:


Lol so many people in this topic are so wrong. I can explain it if you really want me to
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Coolppl Owns
08/27/18 9:29:13 PM
#11:


No_U_L7 posted...
Lol so many people in this topic are so wrong. I can explain it if you really want me to


:grimacing:
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Ultima Dragon
08/27/18 9:31:40 PM
#12:


No_U_L7 posted...
Lol so many people in this topic are so wrong. I can explain it if you really want me to


Spoiler alert: it's because you're all wearing too much deodorant. If you let your natural pheromones flow, suddenly every day of a woman's week is a free day!
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Muffinz0rz
08/27/18 10:12:40 PM
#13:


Burgess posted...
They're dodging you.

Which has happened to me before and I don't mind it, but like, why do they go out of the way to put so much effort into it? Why'd she swipe right? Why'd she talk to me? Why'd she give me her number? Why'd she agree to an activity? Why is she still literally even responding?

I'd rather just stop responding entirely than continue responding to someone when I knew full well I wasn't gonna ever go out with them.

It's just so counter-intuitive.

AlephZero posted...
the average man is unfuckable

the average woman gets blasted by limitless chad dick

5Yue4PRyQ3PiD8Y8SK

Ultima Dragon posted...
Most women are extremely flaky. It was like this even before online dating. I've gotten plenty of girls numbers at school or work or wherever I happened to be, talked to them, plans were always made on both sides but nothing ever materializes.

Yeah it's like the equivalent of old friends being like "omg we should hang out sometime!!1!" but never do
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JBaLLEN66
08/27/18 10:14:55 PM
#14:


Its because youre not a Chad
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Muffinz0rz
08/27/18 10:16:10 PM
#15:


JBaLLEN66 posted...
Its because youre not a Chad

Right but I'm not going for average women
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KiwiTerraRizing
08/27/18 10:17:15 PM
#16:


Sounds like she isnt into you and is too chickenshit to tell you.
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Muffinz0rz
08/27/18 10:18:48 PM
#17:


KiwiTerraRizing posted...
Sounds like she isnt into you and is too chickenshit to tell you.

But it's not just one; I can think of literally six right now whose numbers I've gotten in the last week that won't commit to a date or time. One of them is actually the one texting me first on most occasions, but she's still "too busy moving into her apartment" and shit like that

Like come on, that's a one day thing, tops
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KiwiTerraRizing
08/27/18 10:20:28 PM
#18:


Muffinz0rz posted...
KiwiTerraRizing posted...
Sounds like she isnt into you and is too chickenshit to tell you.

But it's not just one; I can think of literally six right now whose numbers I've gotten in the last week that won't commit to a date or time. One of them is actually the one texting me first on most occasions, but she's still "too busy moving into her apartment" and shit like that

Like come on, that's a one day thing, tops


Dont waste your time man, you deserve better.
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Muffinz0rz
08/27/18 10:22:03 PM
#19:


KiwiTerraRizing posted...
Muffinz0rz posted...
KiwiTerraRizing posted...
Sounds like she isnt into you and is too chickenshit to tell you.

But it's not just one; I can think of literally six right now whose numbers I've gotten in the last week that won't commit to a date or time. One of them is actually the one texting me first on most occasions, but she's still "too busy moving into her apartment" and shit like that

Like come on, that's a one day thing, tops


Dont waste your time man, you deserve better.

Thanks famalam!

Fortunately it's not a big time-waster, as it takes a few seconds to craft a text/message, otherwise I'd be a little more annoyed.

It's more confusing than it is irritating. It's not like I'm frothing at the mouth over this.
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Muffinz0rz
08/28/18 10:22:03 PM
#21:


Who posted #20?
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SauI_Goodman
08/28/18 10:24:21 PM
#22:


Talk to women in person who don't need the internet to get a date.
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Flockaveli
08/28/18 10:26:05 PM
#23:


Who goes on dates now? Just fuck and move onto the next.
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electricbugs2
08/28/18 10:30:43 PM
#24:


I had a lot of trouble with this in my high school days. Girls would constantly beg me to do shit with them, but for the majority of my time there, nothing happened. In fact no meet up till senior year.

Now I find it's actually the opposite, girls in their mid twenties will text me for a bit, ghost me for months, then come back to do it again, whereas the 19 year olds make it pretty clear immediately if they're interested or not.

Not sure what caused the shift, but both age ranges were just as annoying as the other.
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Vermander
08/28/18 10:33:23 PM
#25:


rodu_jr posted...
Muffinz0rz posted...
Awesome, how about we do Friday?
-Nope, sorry, can't
No worries how bout Saturday?
-Nope, sorry, can't
No worries how bout a weekday sometime next week after work?
-Nope, sorry, can't


that's when you move on


Yeah I dont know why you would even waste your energy after that.
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NeuralLaxative
08/28/18 10:35:00 PM
#26:


Hey let me know whens good for you Im free whenever!

No response, move on. Aint hard bruv
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GameboyTroy
08/29/18 4:24:04 AM
#27:


Flockaveli posted...
Who goes on dates now? Just fuck and move onto the next.

I like the way you're thinking.
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GAMERCAMRY
08/29/18 4:30:08 AM
#28:


damn at least they take the effort to give you the run-around, girls straight up say "no" to me smh
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Muffinz0rz
08/29/18 10:43:29 AM
#29:


SauI_Goodman posted...
Talk to women in person who don't need the internet to get a date.

This rarely happens anymore outside bars, and I hate most bars these days

NeuralLaxative posted...
Hey let me know whens good for you Im free whenever!

No response, move on. Aint hard bruv

That's too open-ended. "Let me know what works for you" is almost always the last message in all my conversations because they just immediately end after that
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thelovefist
08/29/18 10:47:52 AM
#30:


Just ask them when a good time is for them after they've declined a couple of your suggested times? Why is this a difficult thing for you?
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Muffinz0rz
08/29/18 10:49:02 AM
#31:


thelovefist posted...
Just ask them when a good time is for them after they've declined a couple of your suggested times? Why is this a difficult thing for you?

Muffinz0rz posted...
"Let me know what works for you" is almost always the last message in all my conversations because they just immediately end after that

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#32
Post #32 was unavailable or deleted.
thelovefist
08/29/18 10:51:19 AM
#33:


Muffinz0rz posted...
thelovefist posted...
Just ask them when a good time is for them after they've declined a couple of your suggested times? Why is this a difficult thing for you?

Muffinz0rz posted...
"Let me know what works for you" is almost always the last message in all my conversations because they just immediately end after that

Well then move the fuck on. Again, I am not understanding why this is a difficult thing for you to grasp...
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Muffinz0rz
08/29/18 10:57:36 AM
#34:


JustMyOpinion posted...
My man Aziz knows the struggle.

ChIA9fG

Literally me when I pose a date/time

thelovefist posted...
Muffinz0rz posted...
thelovefist posted...
Just ask them when a good time is for them after they've declined a couple of your suggested times? Why is this a difficult thing for you?

Muffinz0rz posted...
"Let me know what works for you" is almost always the last message in all my conversations because they just immediately end after that

Well then move the fuck on.

Muffinz0rz posted...
Fortunately it's not a big time-waster, as it takes a few seconds to craft a text/message, otherwise I'd be a little more annoyed.

It's more confusing than it is irritating. It's not like I'm frothing at the mouth over this.

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thelovefist
08/29/18 10:58:00 AM
#35:


Shut the fuck up
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Muffinz0rz
08/29/18 10:58:53 AM
#36:


thelovefist posted...
Shut the fuck up

LOL funny coming from the one posting stuff I can literally respond to by quoting things I've already posted ITT

Read the topic next time famalam
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DarthWendy
08/29/18 11:01:13 AM
#37:


Muffinz0rz posted...
Now I'm no Chad

There's your answer.
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Muffinz0rz
08/29/18 11:02:26 AM
#38:


DarthWendy posted...
Muffinz0rz posted...
Now I'm no Chad

There's your answer.

Yeah I should stop targeting average women
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DarthWendy
08/29/18 11:05:43 AM
#39:


Muffinz0rz posted...
DarthWendy posted...
Muffinz0rz posted...
Now I'm no Chad

There's your answer.

Yeah I should stop targeting average women

Exactly ! You should rather aim for unlimited supplies of Stacys. I heard there are plenty in the US of A.
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Blue_Inigo
08/29/18 11:08:04 AM
#40:


AlephZero posted...
the average man is unfuckable

the average woman gets blasted by limitless chad dick

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kinetika_
08/29/18 11:15:05 AM
#41:


So glad I'm out of the dating game. Too many damn games.
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GameboyTroy
08/29/18 8:13:30 PM
#42:


GameboyTroy posted...
Flockaveli posted...
Who goes on dates now? Just fuck and move onto the next.

I like the way you're thinking.

I'd rather chill or hangout with them instead of going on a date kind of dates. It's a more of a relaxed type of situation.
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Leanaunfurled
08/29/18 8:21:58 PM
#43:


I think a lot of women are used to and expect men to do all the work. Picking a place, picking a time, paying for their food or whatever, etc. Initiative is good and all, but people also need to meet halfway. If you're getting constant "sorry that doesn't work for me" and nothing else, just ask them what a good time for them is. I know you already addressed this, and for those that don't respond after that...screw it, toss 'em out of your mind and move along. There's a lot of shit out of there but eventually you'll come across someone that will put in some basic effort as well.
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Nasty_Nitro
08/29/18 9:54:15 PM
#44:


Of you have to ask so many times YOU have to take the hint
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Muffinz0rz
08/30/18 12:21:51 PM
#45:


GameboyTroy posted...
GameboyTroy posted...
Flockaveli posted...
Who goes on dates now? Just fuck and move onto the next.

I like the way you're thinking.

I'd rather chill or hangout with them instead of going on a date kind of dates. It's a more of a relaxed type of situation.

I personally like that too, but chads ruined the whole "netflix and chill" idea of a hangout because now women associated it with getting blasted by limitless chad dick

I mean now what woman is going to say yes to a "let's just hang out at my place!" nowadays
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GameboyTroy
08/30/18 4:58:03 PM
#46:


Muffinz0rz posted...
GameboyTroy posted...
GameboyTroy posted...
Flockaveli posted...
Who goes on dates now? Just fuck and move onto the next.

I like the way you're thinking.

I'd rather chill or hangout with them instead of going on a date kind of dates. It's a more of a relaxed type of situation.

I personally like that too, but chads ruined the whole "netflix and chill" idea of a hangout because now women associated it with getting blasted by limitless chad dick

I mean now what woman is going to say yes to a "let's just hang out at my place!" nowadays

Chads probably used the "netflix and chill" idea a ton.

Hanging out at her place doesn't sound bad.
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