Current Events > My ex did something I think is pretty scummy

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KhanJohnny 08/21/18 10:35:47 PM #1:	So we had been in a long distance relationship for about a year at this point which turned into an open relationship towards the end, but have been together for four years total. We just broke up a little over a month ago when she last visited me. She still has shit at my apartment and has to come visit me to get the last of her stuff. I've been texting her about once a week to check in and see how things are going, and I would see if she had any interest in getting back together. She really wasn't receptive to the idea, but I explained to her that once she comes to get her shit, I would make one final pitch to her and if she refuses I would stop pestering her about wanting to get back together. To me this logistically made the most sense, since we were long distance, and I would probably not see her ever again anyway once she gathered her things and went back home. I told her I had no expectations, and that I just wanted the one last opportunity, after which we could work on being friends, if that's what she wanted, which is what she indicated. She never rejected this idea. So today, she calls me to confirm that her tickets are booked. She then proceeds to drop the bomb on me out of the blue that she's "seeing someone, but not seriously." I honestly had no words. Like I know that she was seeing guys on the side, and I was seeing girls too as we were being open before the breakup, so it's not that I'm that upset that she was hooking up with someone because I expected that. But to essentially ruin my chance at getting the closure I needed, when I specifically told her I had no expectations of her because I just wanted one last chance to make a pitch, and when it was already understood that we were both probably hooking up with people, was just a terrible low blow to me. In the end I guess it's a good thing, and I learned a valuable lesson: trust no one. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907319586] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>So we had been in a long distance relationship for about a year at this point which turned into an open relationship towards the end, but have been together for four years total. We just broke up a little over a month ago when she last visited me. She still has shit at my apartment and has to come visit me to get the last of her stuff. I've been texting her about once a week to check in and see how things are going, and I would see if she had any interest in getting back together. She really wasn't receptive to the idea, but I explained to her that once she comes to get her shit, I would make one final pitch to her and if she refuses I would stop pestering her about wanting to get back together. To me this logistically made the most sense, since we were long distance, and I would probably not see her ever again anyway once she gathered her things and went back home. I told her I had no expectations, and that I just wanted the one last opportunity, after which we could work on being friends, if that's what she wanted, which is what she indicated. She never rejected this idea. So today, she calls me to confirm that her tickets are booked. She then proceeds to drop the bomb on me out of the blue that she's "seeing someone, but not seriously." I honestly had no words. Like I know that she was seeing guys on the side, and I was seeing girls too as we were being open before the breakup, so it's not that I'm that upset that she was hooking up with someone because I expected that. But to essentially ruin my chance at getting the closure I needed, when I specifically told her I had no expectations of her because I just wanted one last chance to make a pitch, and when it was already understood that we were both probably hooking up with people, was just a terrible low blow to me. In the end I guess it's a good thing, and I learned a valuable lesson: trust no one.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Unsugarized_Foo 08/21/18 10:38:03 PM #2:	Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get --- "All I have is my balls and my word, and I don't break them for anyone!"-Tony Montana <cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted [p:907319721] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 10:38:28 PM #3:	Unsugarized_Foo posted... Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get She still has to come get her stuff.... <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907319753] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted...</cite> <quote>Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get</quote> She still has to come get her stuff....</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Flockaveli 08/21/18 10:39:11 PM #4:	Youre that long distance open relationship with a college chick guy right? Also you never answered my question when you first made the topic: Is she Asian? --- Chicago, greatest city in the world! <cite>Flockaveli posted [p:907319802] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>Youre that long distance open relationship with a college chick guy right? Also you never answered my question when you first made the topic: Is she Asian?</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
HighOnSolar 08/21/18 10:39:34 PM #5:	bruh, as someone who's been in a similarly weird situation, it is a good thing, and much better than being strung along. Something i've learned is that sometimes you have to get your own closure. --- Surf <cite>HighOnSolar posted [p:907319821] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>bruh, as someone who's been in a similarly weird situation, it is a good thing, and much better than being strung along. Something i've learned is that sometimes you have to get your own closure.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Unsugarized_Foo 08/21/18 10:39:54 PM #6:	KhanJohnny posted... Unsugarized_Foo posted... Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get She still has to come get her stuff.... And? Give it to her and close the door, don't be weird --- "All I have is my balls and my word, and I don't break them for anyone!"-Tony Montana <cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted [p:907319845] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted...</cite> <quote>Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get</quote> She still has to come get her stuff....</quote> And? Give it to her and close the door, don't be weird</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 10:40:22 PM #7:	Flockaveli posted... Youre that long distance open relationship with a college chick guy right? Also you never answered my question when you first made the topic: Is she Asian? Why does race matter lol. What if I say yes, she's Asian? And she graduated a year ago, but we were dating since college. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907319868] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>Flockaveli posted...</cite> <quote>Youre that long distance open relationship with a college chick guy right? Also you never answered my question when you first made the topic: Is she Asian?</quote> Why does race matter lol. What if I say yes, she's Asian? And she graduated a year ago, but we were dating since college.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 10:42:29 PM #8:	Unsugarized_Foo posted... KhanJohnny posted... Unsugarized_Foo posted... Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get She still has to come get her stuff.... And? Give it to her and close the door, don't be weird She has to fly over, and the plan was to let her spend two nights because she has to fly back out. So we're going to be in the same place for like 40 hours lol. I'm not going to make her waste a couple hundred bucks on a hotel, just because I'm a nice dude. And I just wanted to make a last pitch to her. It's crazy, because last week when we talked she actually brought up whether we would have sex, which is what she wanted. And now this week she drops this bomb on me. She has no awareness whatsoever that these two ideas might be conflicting. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907319998] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted...</cite> <quote>Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get</quote> She still has to come get her stuff....</quote> And? Give it to her and close the door, don't be weird</quote> She has to fly over, and the plan was to let her spend two nights because she has to fly back out. So we're going to be in the same place for like 40 hours lol. I'm not going to make her waste a couple hundred bucks on a hotel, just because I'm a nice dude. And I just wanted to make a last pitch to her. It's crazy, because last week when we talked she actually brought up whether we would have sex, which is what she wanted. And now this week she drops this bomb on me. She has no awareness whatsoever that these two ideas might be conflicting.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
QwelzaarKane 08/21/18 10:42:37 PM #9:	KhanJohnny posted... But to essentially ruin my chance at getting the closure I needed, when I specifically told her I had no expectations of her because I just wanted one last chance to make a pitch, Sounds like you didn't have that chance to begin with. --- Ain't no love shown but to those who down til we die <cite>QwelzaarKane posted [p:907320016] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote>But to essentially ruin my chance at getting the closure I needed, when I specifically told her I had no expectations of her because I just wanted one last chance to make a pitch, </quote> Sounds like you didn't have that chance to begin with.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Unsugarized_Foo 08/21/18 10:43:50 PM #10:	KhanJohnny posted... Unsugarized_Foo posted... KhanJohnny posted... Unsugarized_Foo posted... Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get She still has to come get her stuff.... And? Give it to her and close the door, don't be weird She has to fly over, and the plan was to let her spend two nights because she has to fly back out. So we're going to be in the same place for like 40 hours lol. I just wanted to make a last pitch to her. It's crazy, because last week when we talked she actually brought up whether we would have sex, which is what she wanted. And now this week she drops this bomb on me. She has no awareness whatsoever that these two ideas might be conflicting. That whole thing is weird. That's gonna be 40 hours of weird --- "All I have is my balls and my word, and I don't break them for anyone!"-Tony Montana <cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted [p:907320080] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted...</cite> <quote>Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get</quote> She still has to come get her stuff....</quote> And? Give it to her and close the door, don't be weird</quote> She has to fly over, and the plan was to let her spend two nights because she has to fly back out. So we're going to be in the same place for like 40 hours lol. I just wanted to make a last pitch to her. It's crazy, because last week when we talked she actually brought up whether we would have sex, which is what she wanted. And now this week she drops this bomb on me. She has no awareness whatsoever that these two ideas might be conflicting.</quote> That whole thing is weird. That's gonna be 40 hours of weird</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
__aCEr__ 08/21/18 10:45:13 PM #11:	I'd really like to hear what this wonderful pitch was going to be. <cite>__aCEr__ posted [p:907320180] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>I'd really like to hear what this wonderful pitch was going to be.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 10:45:41 PM #12:	QwelzaarKane posted... KhanJohnny posted... But to essentially ruin my chance at getting the closure I needed, when I specifically told her I had no expectations of her because I just wanted one last chance to make a pitch, Sounds like you didn't have that chance to begin with. And that's absolutely fine. I told her to just let me take her out for the two nights we're hear and give her a pitch. I reassured her that she shouldn't feel guilty about letting me do this, because I just wanted the opportunity for her to hear me out. I am already hosting her and saving her money on a hotel, not to mention the fact that I've been storing this shit for her which she left from college over a year ago, free of charge. The least she could do is just let me do a song or dance, and then reject me if she wants to and one last fuck, which is what she was hinting at last week. Again, I told her I didn't expect anything of her and wouldn't feel bad or mad at her if she rejected what I had to say. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907320210] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>QwelzaarKane posted...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote>But to essentially ruin my chance at getting the closure I needed, when I specifically told her I had no expectations of her because I just wanted one last chance to make a pitch, </quote> Sounds like you didn't have that chance to begin with.</quote> And that's absolutely fine. I told her to just let me take her out for the two nights we're hear and give her a pitch. I reassured her that she shouldn't feel guilty about letting me do this, because I just wanted the opportunity for her to hear me out. I am already hosting her and saving her money on a hotel, not to mention the fact that I've been storing this shit for her which she left from college over a year ago, free of charge. The least she could do is just let me do a song or dance, and then reject me if she wants to and one last fuck, which is what she was hinting at last week. Again, I told her I didn't expect anything of her and wouldn't feel bad or mad at her if she rejected what I had to say.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Muffinz0rz 08/21/18 10:45:53 PM #13:	Unsugarized_Foo posted... KhanJohnny posted... Unsugarized_Foo posted... KhanJohnny posted... Unsugarized_Foo posted... Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get She still has to come get her stuff.... And? Give it to her and close the door, don't be weird She has to fly over, and the plan was to let her spend two nights because she has to fly back out. So we're going to be in the same place for like 40 hours lol. I just wanted to make a last pitch to her. It's crazy, because last week when we talked she actually brought up whether we would have sex, which is what she wanted. And now this week she drops this bomb on me. She has no awareness whatsoever that these two ideas might be conflicting. That whole thing is weird. That's gonna be 40 hours of weird So fuck her What's the dilemma here You're basically being given a 40-hour bang fest at which point you can send her packing and start smashing other average women with your limitless chad dick I'm not seeing the problem --- Not removing this until Pat Benatar is in Super Smash Bros. (Started 8/31/2010) 2018 NFLB Summersim (7-8): https://imgur.com/7cjNtgQ <cite>Muffinz0rz posted [p:907320220] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted...</cite> <quote>Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get</quote> She still has to come get her stuff....</quote> And? Give it to her and close the door, don't be weird</quote> She has to fly over, and the plan was to let her spend two nights because she has to fly back out. So we're going to be in the same place for like 40 hours lol. I just wanted to make a last pitch to her. It's crazy, because last week when we talked she actually brought up whether we would have sex, which is what she wanted. And now this week she drops this bomb on me. She has no awareness whatsoever that these two ideas might be conflicting.</quote> That whole thing is weird. That's gonna be 40 hours of weird</quote> So fuck her What's the dilemma here You're basically being given a 40-hour bang fest at which point you can send her packing and start smashing other average women with your limitless chad dick I'm not seeing the problem</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Ruid 08/21/18 10:47:06 PM #14:	People tend to split up for a reason. Getting back together is a great way to jog your memory on why it ended in the first place. <cite>Ruid posted [p:907320297] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>People tend to split up for a reason. Getting back together is a great way to jog your memory on why it ended in the first place.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 10:51:33 PM #15:	__aCEr__ posted... I'd really like to hear what this wonderful pitch was going to be. We honestly had the definition of a roller coaster relationship. Extremely high highs with amazing sex, great time hanging out on the town, travelling the world, fancy dates followed by extremely painful bouts of yelling, emotional incompatibility, callousness, and all sorts of hurtful behavior. Then we'd make up and get back to the highs, and so on My plan was just to show her some of the highs that we have by taking her out/treating her well, so she could see what she was giving up, but also to moderate that with some serious conversation about some of the insights I've learned about why we fight so much and so hard, and some of the changes I think we would need to take to fix it. I wanted to let her know that she was important to me, and that I was prepared to do whatever it takes to make this thing work. Did I think she was going to be convinced? Not at all. I thought maybe I had a 20% chance of convincing her. I would have been shocked if she took me back, knowing how stubborn she was. But all I was asking for was two nights to make my case, and then I was ready to give it up and move on. I made this perfectly clear to her numerous times. And now I feel completely duped. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907320561] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>__aCEr__ posted...</cite> <quote>I'd really like to hear what this wonderful pitch was going to be.</quote> We honestly had the definition of a roller coaster relationship. Extremely high highs with amazing sex, great time hanging out on the town, travelling the world, fancy dates followed by extremely painful bouts of yelling, emotional incompatibility, callousness, and all sorts of hurtful behavior. Then we'd make up and get back to the highs, and so on My plan was just to show her some of the highs that we have by taking her out/treating her well, so she could see what she was giving up, but also to moderate that with some serious conversation about some of the insights I've learned about why we fight so much and so hard, and some of the changes I think we would need to take to fix it. I wanted to let her know that she was important to me, and that I was prepared to do whatever it takes to make this thing work. Did I think she was going to be convinced? Not at all. I thought maybe I had a 20% chance of convincing her. I would have been shocked if she took me back, knowing how stubborn she was. But all I was asking for was two nights to make my case, and then I was ready to give it up and move on. I made this perfectly clear to her numerous times. And now I feel completely duped.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Pow Pow Punishment 08/21/18 10:53:11 PM #16:	Sucks that you're hurt, but as a single person she has no obligation to wait for you if she finds someone she likes. Nothing scummy about what she did. --- Currently playing: Knights of the Old Republic (Android) Training log: https://powpowpunishment.blogspot.com <cite>Pow Pow Punishment posted [p:907320662] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>Sucks that you're hurt, but as a single person she has no obligation to wait for you if she finds someone she likes. Nothing scummy about what she did.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Ruid 08/21/18 10:54:13 PM #17:	What you had wasn't healthy. She's right to try to move on. Once you get past this, you'll look back and see yourself as a bitch for even having this notion. Don't do yourself this way, dude. <cite>Ruid posted [p:907320718] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>What you had wasn't healthy. She's right to try to move on. Once you get past this, you'll look back and see yourself as a bitch for even having this notion. Don't do yourself this way, dude.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Pow Pow Punishment 08/21/18 10:54:38 PM #18:	Also maybe she felt that being separated is the right decision and if you convince her she'll make a mistake based on emotions by being buddy-buddy with you in-person. --- Currently playing: Knights of the Old Republic (Android) Training log: https://powpowpunishment.blogspot.com <cite>Pow Pow Punishment posted [p:907320739] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>Also maybe she felt that being separated is the right decision and if you convince her she'll make a mistake based on emotions by being buddy-buddy with you in-person.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 10:55:10 PM #19:	Muffinz0rz posted... Unsugarized_Foo posted... KhanJohnny posted... Unsugarized_Foo posted... KhanJohnny posted... Unsugarized_Foo posted... Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get She still has to come get her stuff.... And? Give it to her and close the door, don't be weird She has to fly over, and the plan was to let her spend two nights because she has to fly back out. So we're going to be in the same place for like 40 hours lol. I just wanted to make a last pitch to her. It's crazy, because last week when we talked she actually brought up whether we would have sex, which is what she wanted. And now this week she drops this bomb on me. She has no awareness whatsoever that these two ideas might be conflicting. That whole thing is weird. That's gonna be 40 hours of weird So fuck her What's the dilemma here You're basically being given a 40-hour bang fest at which point you can send her packing and start smashing other average women with your limitless chad dick I'm not seeing the problem I was planning on fucking her originally, even if she didn't want me back. But now that I know that one of these guys she was hooking up in has been elevated to someone she's "seeing" has just completely thrown off my thinking. When we were in the midst of the breakup she kept telling me how she really doubted she could enter a relationship for a long time because she was so hurt by what happened between us. Now she tells me she's seeing someone, but "not seriously." It's bullshit. If it's worth mentioning, then this is obviously something more than the hookups we've allowed each other to have on the side. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907320773] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>Muffinz0rz posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted...</cite> <quote>Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get</quote> She still has to come get her stuff....</quote> And? Give it to her and close the door, don't be weird</quote> She has to fly over, and the plan was to let her spend two nights because she has to fly back out. So we're going to be in the same place for like 40 hours lol. I just wanted to make a last pitch to her. It's crazy, because last week when we talked she actually brought up whether we would have sex, which is what she wanted. And now this week she drops this bomb on me. She has no awareness whatsoever that these two ideas might be conflicting.</quote> That whole thing is weird. That's gonna be 40 hours of weird</quote> So fuck her What's the dilemma here You're basically being given a 40-hour bang fest at which point you can send her packing and start smashing other average women with your limitless chad dick I'm not seeing the problem</quote> I was planning on fucking her originally, even if she didn't want me back. But now that I know that one of these guys she was hooking up in has been elevated to someone she's "seeing" has just completely thrown off my thinking. When we were in the midst of the breakup she kept telling me how she really doubted she could enter a relationship for a long time because she was so hurt by what happened between us. Now she tells me she's seeing someone, but "not seriously." It's bullshit. If it's worth mentioning, then this is obviously something more than the hookups we've allowed each other to have on the side.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
GiftedACIII 08/21/18 10:55:42 PM #20:	You literally expected it --- </topic> <cite>GiftedACIII posted [p:907320797] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>You literally expected it</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Pow Pow Punishment 08/21/18 10:56:03 PM #21:	Ruid posted... What you had wasn't healthy. She's right to try to move on. Once you get past this, you'll look back and see yourself as a bitch for even having this notion. Don't do yourself this way, dude. I disagree, nothing wrong with being passionate about someone. He's not sacrificing anything to make him a bitch. Of course, she's also not wrong to want to move on. --- Currently playing: Knights of the Old Republic (Android) Training log: https://powpowpunishment.blogspot.com <cite>Pow Pow Punishment posted [p:907320818] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>Ruid posted...</cite> <quote>What you had wasn't healthy. She's right to try to move on. Once you get past this, you'll look back and see yourself as a bitch for even having this notion. Don't do yourself this way, dude.</quote> I disagree, nothing wrong with being passionate about someone. He's not sacrificing anything to make him a bitch. Of course, she's also not wrong to want to move on.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Flockaveli 08/21/18 10:56:31 PM #22:	You cant turn a ho into a housewife. --- Chicago, greatest city in the world! <cite>Flockaveli posted [p:907320840] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>You cant turn a ho into a housewife.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Ruid 08/21/18 10:57:45 PM #23:	Either way, he has two uncomfortable days coming. The night before, eat a whole lot of chili and other foods that'll give you horrible gas. Then report back. <cite>Ruid posted [p:907320899] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>Either way, he has two uncomfortable days coming. The night before, eat a whole lot of chili and other foods that'll give you horrible gas. Then report back.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 10:59:01 PM #24:	Pow Pow Punishment posted... Sucks that you're hurt, but as a single person she has no obligation to wait for you if she finds someone she likes. Nothing scummy about what she did. I know she has no obligation to wait for me. All I asked was that she hear me out with no expectations whatsoever, and I was almost certain that she was hooking up/seeing other guys in some capacity. But we get to see each other so rarely because we're in the long distance relationship, so for me this final meeting would have been a good way to get some finality. Because if she turned me down, then this would almost certainly be the last time I see her regardless. And so all she had to do was take the free dinner and drinks I was offering, and have sex with me (which is what she said she wanted). Then she could go on and live her life without me having any hard feelings against her, and we could be friends. Now the very last time I see her is going to be tense, awkward, and potentially hostile. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907320986] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>Pow Pow Punishment posted...</cite> <quote>Sucks that you're hurt, but as a single person she has no obligation to wait for you if she finds someone she likes. Nothing scummy about what she did.</quote> I know she has no obligation to wait for me. All I asked was that she hear me out with no expectations whatsoever, and I was almost certain that she was hooking up/seeing other guys in some capacity. But we get to see each other so rarely because we're in the long distance relationship, so for me this final meeting would have been a good way to get some finality. Because if she turned me down, then this would almost certainly be the last time I see her regardless. And so all she had to do was take the free dinner and drinks I was offering, and have sex with me (which is what she said she wanted). Then she could go on and live her life without me having any hard feelings against her, and we could be friends. Now the very last time I see her is going to be tense, awkward, and potentially hostile.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
OpShaft 08/21/18 11:04:27 PM #25:	Just tap that ass and see her off. A last hurrah --- Posted with GameRaven 3.5.1 <cite>OpShaft posted [p:907321260] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>Just tap that ass and see her off. A last hurrah</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 11:08:14 PM #26:	OpShaft posted... Just tap that ass and see her off. A last hurrah I mean that was the back up plan in the first place. But at this point, I just don't know man. I'm pissed and hurt lol <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907321482] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>OpShaft posted...</cite> <quote>Just tap that ass and see her off. A last hurrah</quote> I mean that was the back up plan in the first place. But at this point, I just don't know man. I'm pissed and hurt lol</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
OpShaft 08/21/18 11:10:37 PM #27:	KhanJohnny posted... OpShaft posted... Just tap that ass and see her off. A last hurrah I mean that was the back up plan in the first place. But at this point, I just don't know man. I'm pissed and hurt lol You can be pissed and hurt afterwards. It's your last chance --- Posted with GameRaven 3.5.1 <cite>OpShaft posted [p:907321642] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>OpShaft posted...</cite> <quote> Just tap that ass and see her off. A last hurrah</quote> I mean that was the back up plan in the first place. But at this point, I just don't know man. I'm pissed and hurt lol</quote> You can be pissed and hurt afterwards. It's your last chance</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 11:13:47 PM #28:	OpShaft posted... KhanJohnny posted... OpShaft posted... Just tap that ass and see her off. A last hurrah I mean that was the back up plan in the first place. But at this point, I just don't know man. I'm pissed and hurt lol You can be pissed and hurt afterwards. It's your last chance But I feel like if I do have sex with her, I'm letting her win. She gets everything. She gets to completely blow shit up in my face, obliterate the closure I was seeking that required no obligations on her part, a free room for two nights along with the safe return of her stuff, the privilege of sleeping around and telling me about, and finally the good dick that she wants one or two more times. Sure I might get some ass, but I'm just going to feel hurt and defeated afterwards like I'm some piece of meat lol <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907321813] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>OpShaft posted...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>OpShaft posted...</cite> <quote> Just tap that ass and see her off. A last hurrah</quote> I mean that was the back up plan in the first place. But at this point, I just don't know man. I'm pissed and hurt lol</quote> You can be pissed and hurt afterwards. It's your last chance</quote> But I feel like if I do have sex with her, I'm letting her win. She gets everything. She gets to completely blow shit up in my face, obliterate the closure I was seeking that required no obligations on her part, a free room for two nights along with the safe return of her stuff, the privilege of sleeping around and telling me about, and finally the good dick that she wants one or two more times. Sure I might get some ass, but I'm just going to feel hurt and defeated afterwards like I'm some piece of meat lol</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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Spam_n_eggs 08/21/18 11:20:33 PM #30:	Flockaveli posted... Youre that long distance open relationship with a college chick guy right? Also you never answered my question when you first made the topic: Is she Asian? Isnt TC one of those guys who post racist stuff all the time? And he dares have his feelings hurt? Lmao why can you have feelings and deserve empathy and closure when youre cruel to others because of the color of their skin!? <cite>Spam_n_eggs posted [p:907322198] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>Flockaveli posted...</cite> <quote>Youre that long distance open relationship with a college chick guy right? Also you never answered my question when you first made the topic: Is she Asian?</quote> Isnt TC one of those guys who post racist stuff all the time? And he dares have his feelings hurt? Lmao why can you have feelings and deserve empathy and closure when youre cruel to others because of the color of their skin!?</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 11:21:13 PM #31:	Spam_n_eggs posted... Flockaveli posted... Youre that long distance open relationship with a college chick guy right? Also you never answered my question when you first made the topic: Is she Asian? Isnt TC one of those guys who post racist stuff all the time? And he dares have his feelings hurt? Lmao why can you have feelings and deserve empathy and closure when youre cruel to others because of the color of their skin!? I'm a racial minority myself so I really doubt I'm racist, but maybe so. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907322239] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>Spam_n_eggs posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Flockaveli posted...</cite> <quote>Youre that long distance open relationship with a college chick guy right? Also you never answered my question when you first made the topic: Is she Asian?</quote> Isnt TC one of those guys who post racist stuff all the time? And he dares have his feelings hurt? Lmao why can you have feelings and deserve empathy and closure when youre cruel to others because of the color of their skin!?</quote> I'm a racial minority myself so I really doubt I'm racist, but maybe so.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
catboy0_0 08/21/18 11:22:49 PM #32:	KhanJohnny posted... I'm not going to make her waste a couple hundred bucks on a hotel, just because I'm a nice dude. don't do this --- I obviously like you at least a little to even talk to you -cornman one day I hope to post a message so great it ends up in someones sig -Two_Dee <cite>catboy0_0 posted [p:907322309] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote>I'm not going to make her waste a couple hundred bucks on a hotel, just because I'm a nice dude.</quote> don't do this</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 11:26:09 PM #33:	JustMyOpinion posted... KhanJohnny posted... Pow Pow Punishment posted... Sucks that you're hurt, but as a single person she has no obligation to wait for you if she finds someone she likes. Nothing scummy about what she did. I know she has no obligation to wait for me. All I asked was that she hear me out with no expectations whatsoever, and I was almost certain that she was hooking up/seeing other guys in some capacity. But we get to see each other so rarely because we're in the long distance relationship, so for me this final meeting would have been a good way to get some finality. Because if she turned me down, then this would almost certainly be the last time I see her regardless. And so all she had to do was take the free dinner and drinks I was offering, and have sex with me (which is what she said she wanted). Then she could go on and live her life without me having any hard feelings against her, and we could be friends. Now the very last time I see her is going to be tense, awkward, and potentially hostile. Dude, just let it go. You're trying to make her out to be the bad guy while still claiming she had no obligations and you had no expectations when you clearly did. She's not the bad guy. Being upset about the past won't help you get girls. There's a huge difference in my mind between telling her I have no expectations of her accepting what I have to say during the last time I see her, and her throwing in my face that she's seeing someone now, not even two months after we broke up. We've been together for FOUR YEARS. We talked about marriage, children, and our future together. The least she could have done is give me the final two nights that I will ever see her to give me a chance to make my case and get some final closure, and enjoy our time together. She is well aware that I am very much still in love with her, and I fought extremely hard to try to keep us together. She even claimed that it's not serious at all with this new guy she's seeing. So why even mention it when this trip is right around the corner? If she isn't exclusive with this dude yet, and she explicitly disclaimed the notion that they are in a relationship or anything like that, what's the point in even bringing it up, except to cause me emotional distress ahead of her visit? Again, this is likely the very last time we will see each other. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907322501] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>JustMyOpinion posted...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Pow Pow Punishment posted...</cite> <quote>Sucks that you're hurt, but as a single person she has no obligation to wait for you if she finds someone she likes. Nothing scummy about what she did.</quote> I know she has no obligation to wait for me. All I asked was that she hear me out with no expectations whatsoever, and I was almost certain that she was hooking up/seeing other guys in some capacity. But we get to see each other so rarely because we're in the long distance relationship, so for me this final meeting would have been a good way to get some finality. Because if she turned me down, then this would almost certainly be the last time I see her regardless. And so all she had to do was take the free dinner and drinks I was offering, and have sex with me (which is what she said she wanted). Then she could go on and live her life without me having any hard feelings against her, and we could be friends. Now the very last time I see her is going to be tense, awkward, and potentially hostile.</quote> Dude, just let it go. You're trying to make her out to be the bad guy while still claiming she had no obligations and you had no expectations when you clearly did. She's not the bad guy. Being upset about the past won't help you get girls.</quote> There's a huge difference in my mind between telling her I have no expectations of her accepting what I have to say during the last time I see her, and her throwing in my face that she's seeing someone now, not even two months after we broke up. We've been together for FOUR YEARS. We talked about marriage, children, and our future together. The least she could have done is give me the final two nights that I will ever see her to give me a chance to make my case and get some final closure, and enjoy our time together. She is well aware that I am very much still in love with her, and I fought extremely hard to try to keep us together. She even claimed that it's not serious at all with this new guy she's seeing. So why even mention it when this trip is right around the corner? If she isn't exclusive with this dude yet, and she explicitly disclaimed the notion that they are in a relationship or anything like that, what's the point in even bringing it up, except to cause me emotional distress ahead of her visit? Again, this is likely the very last time we will see each other.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 11:28:27 PM #34:	@HighOnSolar posted... bruh, as someone who's been in a similarly weird situation, it is a good thing, and much better than being strung along. Something i've learned is that sometimes you have to get your own closure. I'm very curious to hear about what happened to you, if you're willing to share. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907322638] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>@HighOnSolar posted...</cite> <quote>bruh, as someone who's been in a similarly weird situation, it is a good thing, and much better than being strung along. Something i've learned is that sometimes you have to get your own closure.</quote> I'm very curious to hear about what happened to you, if you're willing to share.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
solosnake 08/21/18 11:29:28 PM #35:	Unsugarized_Foo posted... Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get --- "We would have no NBA possibly if they got rid of all the flopping." ~ Dwyane Wade https://imgur.com/MYYEIx5 https://imgur.com/WGE12ef <cite>solosnake posted [p:907322696] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>Unsugarized_Foo posted...</cite> <quote>Lol, that's about as good of closure as you can get</quote></quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Ludwig Von 2 08/21/18 11:30:37 PM #36:	I dont think people owe others closure. I mean, why? If she had made up her mind she didnt want you back why does she owe it to you to sit there and listen to you make a final pitch? --- My luck works best when things are... random. Mat Cauthon from The Dragon Reborn <cite>Ludwig Von 2 posted [p:907322753] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>I dont think people owe others closure. I mean, why? If she had made up her mind she didnt want you back why does she owe it to you to sit there and listen to you make a final pitch?</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
solosnake 08/21/18 11:31:43 PM #37:	KhanJohnny posted... JustMyOpinion posted... KhanJohnny posted... Pow Pow Punishment posted... Sucks that you're hurt, but as a single person she has no obligation to wait for you if she finds someone she likes. Nothing scummy about what she did. I know she has no obligation to wait for me. All I asked was that she hear me out with no expectations whatsoever, and I was almost certain that she was hooking up/seeing other guys in some capacity. But we get to see each other so rarely because we're in the long distance relationship, so for me this final meeting would have been a good way to get some finality. Because if she turned me down, then this would almost certainly be the last time I see her regardless. And so all she had to do was take the free dinner and drinks I was offering, and have sex with me (which is what she said she wanted). Then she could go on and live her life without me having any hard feelings against her, and we could be friends. Now the very last time I see her is going to be tense, awkward, and potentially hostile. Dude, just let it go. You're trying to make her out to be the bad guy while still claiming she had no obligations and you had no expectations when you clearly did. She's not the bad guy. Being upset about the past won't help you get girls. There's a huge difference in my mind between telling her I have no expectations of her accepting what I have to say during the last time I see her, and her throwing in my face that she's seeing someone now, not even two months after we broke up. We've been together for FOUR YEARS. We talked about marriage, children, and our future together. The least she could have done is give me the final two nights that I will ever see her to give me a chance to make my case and get some final closure, and enjoy our time together. She is well aware that I am very much still in love with her, and I fought extremely hard to try to keep us together. She even claimed that it's not serious at all with this new guy she's seeing. So why even mention it when this trip is right around the corner? If she isn't exclusive with this dude yet, and she explicitly disclaimed the notion that they are in a relationship or anything like that, what's the point in even bringing it up, except to cause me emotional distress ahead of her visit? Again, this is likely the very last time we will see each other. dude, step back and listen to yourself. This is the mindset of a stalker. She gave you all the closer you could ever ask for, she chose another dude. Take the L and for the love of god dont go pleading to her that you needed closure and you wanted a chance ect ect, you will only push her farther and farther away --- "We would have no NBA possibly if they got rid of all the flopping." ~ Dwyane Wade https://imgur.com/MYYEIx5 https://imgur.com/WGE12ef <cite>solosnake posted [p:907322799] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>JustMyOpinion posted...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Pow Pow Punishment posted...</cite> <quote>Sucks that you're hurt, but as a single person she has no obligation to wait for you if she finds someone she likes. Nothing scummy about what she did.</quote> I know she has no obligation to wait for me. All I asked was that she hear me out with no expectations whatsoever, and I was almost certain that she was hooking up/seeing other guys in some capacity. But we get to see each other so rarely because we're in the long distance relationship, so for me this final meeting would have been a good way to get some finality. Because if she turned me down, then this would almost certainly be the last time I see her regardless. And so all she had to do was take the free dinner and drinks I was offering, and have sex with me (which is what she said she wanted). Then she could go on and live her life without me having any hard feelings against her, and we could be friends. Now the very last time I see her is going to be tense, awkward, and potentially hostile.</quote> Dude, just let it go. You're trying to make her out to be the bad guy while still claiming she had no obligations and you had no expectations when you clearly did. She's not the bad guy. Being upset about the past won't help you get girls.</quote> There's a huge difference in my mind between telling her I have no expectations of her accepting what I have to say during the last time I see her, and her throwing in my face that she's seeing someone now, not even two months after we broke up. We've been together for FOUR YEARS. We talked about marriage, children, and our future together. The least she could have done is give me the final two nights that I will ever see her to give me a chance to make my case and get some final closure, and enjoy our time together. She is well aware that I am very much still in love with her, and I fought extremely hard to try to keep us together. She even claimed that it's not serious at all with this new guy she's seeing. So why even mention it when this trip is right around the corner? If she isn't exclusive with this dude yet, and she explicitly disclaimed the notion that they are in a relationship or anything like that, what's the point in even bringing it up, except to cause me emotional distress ahead of her visit? Again, this is likely the very last time we will see each other.</quote> dude, step back and listen to yourself. This is the mindset of a stalker. She gave you all the closer you could ever ask for, she chose another dude. Take the L and for the love of god dont go pleading to her that you needed closure and you wanted a chance ect ect, you will only push her farther and farther away</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
ECW1125 08/21/18 11:31:56 PM #38:	KhanJohnny posted... which turned into an open relationship towards the end Well, there is your problem <cite>ECW1125 posted [p:907322805] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote>which turned into an open relationship towards the end</quote> Well, there is your problem</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 11:34:34 PM #39:	Ludwig Von 2 posted... I dont think people owe others closure. I mean, why? If she had made up her mind she didnt want you back why does she owe it to you to sit there and listen to you make a final pitch? What does she lose by it? It's two nights following a four year long relationship. I held her shit the entire summer for free, including over two months after we've broken up. I'm letting her stay at my place for free instead of getting a hotel that'll cost her an extra few hundred bucks. What is so fucking hard about spending two nights with me where I was going to take her out on the town and treat her to food and drinks and sex, and maybe deal with a couple last appeals from me about why we should get back together? I told her not to feel worried about taking advantage of me, and that it was my pleasure? What does she gain from throwing an alleged non-serious, noncomital relationship in my face? <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907322937] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>Ludwig Von 2 posted...</cite> <quote>I dont think people owe others closure. I mean, why? If she had made up her mind she didnt want you back why does she owe it to you to sit there and listen to you make a final pitch?</quote> What does she lose by it? It's two nights following a four year long relationship. I held her shit the entire summer for free, including over two months after we've broken up. I'm letting her stay at my place for free instead of getting a hotel that'll cost her an extra few hundred bucks. What is so fucking hard about spending two nights with me where I was going to take her out on the town and treat her to food and drinks and sex, and maybe deal with a couple last appeals from me about why we should get back together? I told her not to feel worried about taking advantage of me, and that it was my pleasure? What does she gain from throwing an alleged non-serious, noncomital relationship in my face?</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Smashingpmkns 08/21/18 11:35:25 PM #40:	This is a fucking sad topic lol she doesn't owe you shit. --- Clean Butt Crew <cite>Smashingpmkns posted [p:907322983] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>This is a fucking sad topic lol she doesn't owe you shit.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 11:36:02 PM #41:	ECW1125 posted... KhanJohnny posted... which turned into an open relationship towards the end Well, there is your problem I completely agree. This was an epic mistake on my part, and I should've focused on fixing the problems in the relationship, not expending mental energy elsewhere. Last time I do some dumb shit like that or a long distance relationship. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907323017] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>ECW1125 posted...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote>which turned into an open relationship towards the end</quote> Well, there is your problem</quote> I completely agree. This was an epic mistake on my part, and I should've focused on fixing the problems in the relationship, not expending mental energy elsewhere. Last time I do some dumb shit like that or a long distance relationship.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 11:37:41 PM #42:	Smashingpmkns posted... This is a fucking sad topic lol she doesn't owe you shit. Can you not empathize with the feeling of mixed messages of your ex telling you last week that she wants to have sex with you during the visit, and then this week throwing in your face that she's seeing someone else for no apparent reason at all? This is literally the last time I will ever see her. Bringing that up does nothing except cause unnecessary pain. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907323089] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>Smashingpmkns posted...</cite> <quote>This is a fucking sad topic lol she doesn't owe you shit.</quote> Can you not empathize with the feeling of mixed messages of your ex telling you last week that she wants to have sex with you during the visit, and then this week throwing in your face that she's seeing someone else for no apparent reason at all? This is literally the last time I will ever see her. Bringing that up does nothing except cause unnecessary pain.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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catboy0_0 08/21/18 11:38:24 PM #44:	sucks but I doubt there's anything you can do about it. I recommend asking her to get a motel room --- I obviously like you at least a little to even talk to you -cornman one day I hope to post a message so great it ends up in someones sig -Two_Dee <cite>catboy0_0 posted [p:907323129] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>sucks but I doubt there's anything you can do about it. I recommend asking her to get a motel room</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Smashingpmkns 08/21/18 11:40:16 PM #45:	KhanJohnny posted... Smashingpmkns posted... This is a fucking sad topic lol she doesn't owe you shit. Can you not empathize the mixed messages of your ex telling you last week that she wants to have sex with you during the visit, and then this week throwing in your face that she's seeing someone else for no apparent reason at all? This is literally the last time I will ever see her. Bringing that up does nothing except cause unnecessary pain. Nope. She doesn't owe you shit and you sound like a "nice guy". --- Clean Butt Crew <cite>Smashingpmkns posted [p:907323235] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Smashingpmkns posted...</cite> <quote> This is a fucking sad topic lol she doesn't owe you shit.</quote> Can you not empathize the mixed messages of your ex telling you last week that she wants to have sex with you during the visit, and then this week throwing in your face that she's seeing someone else for no apparent reason at all? This is literally the last time I will ever see her. Bringing that up does nothing except cause unnecessary pain.</quote> Nope. She doesn't owe you shit and you sound like a "nice guy".</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
#46	Post #46 was unavailable or deleted.
Ludwig Von 2 08/21/18 11:42:01 PM #47:	KhanJohnny posted... Ludwig Von 2 posted... I dont think people owe others closure. I mean, why? If she had made up her mind she didnt want you back why does she owe it to you to sit there and listen to you make a final pitch? What does she lose by it? It's two nights following a four year long relationship. I held her shit the entire summer for free, including over two months after we've broken up. I'm letting her stay at my place for free instead of getting a hotel that'll cost her an extra few hundred bucks. What is so fucking hard about spending two nights with me where I was going to take her out on the town and treat her to food and drinks and sex, and maybe deal with a couple last appeals from me about why we should get back together? I told her not to feel worried about taking advantage of me, and that it was my pleasure? What does she gain from throwing an alleged non-serious, noncomital relationship in my face? I mean what do you gain? And as for that other stuff, I dont really think its all that special. Holding onto her stuff? I mean thats not really that huge of a deal. Staying with you? Again Ive had friends stay at my place before no problem. Again, not a huge deal. Buying dinner? Still, not that great. All of these things you are giving her arent all that much. Maybe in your mind they are but Im telling you these arent grand gestures here. Im going to tell you something that I hope one day you learn. I know you probably wont listen and thats okay, but here you go: People dont owe you anything. --- My luck works best when things are... random. Mat Cauthon from The Dragon Reborn <cite>Ludwig Von 2 posted [p:907323314] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Ludwig Von 2 posted...</cite> <quote>I dont think people owe others closure. I mean, why? If she had made up her mind she didnt want you back why does she owe it to you to sit there and listen to you make a final pitch?</quote> What does she lose by it? It's two nights following a four year long relationship. I held her shit the entire summer for free, including over two months after we've broken up. I'm letting her stay at my place for free instead of getting a hotel that'll cost her an extra few hundred bucks. What is so fucking hard about spending two nights with me where I was going to take her out on the town and treat her to food and drinks and sex, and maybe deal with a couple last appeals from me about why we should get back together? I told her not to feel worried about taking advantage of me, and that it was my pleasure? What does she gain from throwing an alleged non-serious, noncomital relationship in my face?</quote> I mean what do you gain? And as for that other stuff, I dont really think its all that special. Holding onto her stuff? I mean thats not really that huge of a deal. Staying with you? Again Ive had friends stay at my place before no problem. Again, not a huge deal. Buying dinner? Still, not that great. All of these things you are giving her arent all that much. Maybe in your mind they are but Im telling you these arent grand gestures here. Im going to tell you something that I hope one day you learn. I know you probably wont listen and thats okay, but here you go: People dont owe you anything.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 11:43:32 PM #48:	jeffhardyb0yz posted... Once you're broken up. There is no obligation for anything man. All that past shit goes out the window at least for a while. You pushing to get back together so soon just pushes her away. Getting back together has to be the dumper's choice. The dumpee can't just make a "pitch" that will make the dumper say "what a sweet pitch! I'll def have him back now." When you break up, you have to step away from things. You texted her once a week. No space, no chance to miss you, nothing. She knows you're Just sitting there waiting while she's also seeing/getting some action with someone else. You should have just chilled and let her come to you. It's okay, we do these things. You were together for FOUR years. Her feelings for you aren't just going to disappear. If you want this girl back, you gotta let go for a while. Date some other girls and work on yourself. When she starts to miss you and things don't go right with this guy, she'll hit you up guarantee. You gotta reattract her again without being needy like you're being now I completely agree with this advice. The difference is that I don't think it applies in a long distance relationship where you are a flight away. It's not like I can give her time to think over her emotions and then we can meet up at a moment's notice to patch things over, or that we'll run into each other at one of our old haunts and reconnect. At this point our lives are only held together by sheer will. We were only seeing each other every 6-8 weeks or so for a year since she had to move back home. In my mind, if we don't put it back together fast, then there's no real hope. I just don't think it's possible to really rekindle a long distance relationship like that. And so I explained that entire mindset to her. I told her I would not make any more advances after she comes to see me this final time and that I was perfectly open to becoming friends afterwards, because the logistics of it just don't make any sense when you're a 2 hour flight apart, which makes total travel time like 7 hours one way because of the cities we live in. So for me, this was really it. And I just felt like she could have showed me a little bit of respect, given the difficulties of our situation. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907323382] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>jeffhardyb0yz posted...</cite> <quote>Once you're broken up. There is no obligation for anything man. All that past shit goes out the window at least for a while. You pushing to get back together so soon just pushes her away. Getting back together has to be the dumper's choice. The dumpee can't just make a "pitch" that will make the dumper say "what a sweet pitch! I'll def have him back now." When you break up, you have to step away from things. You texted her once a week. No space, no chance to miss you, nothing. She knows you're Just sitting there waiting while she's also seeing/getting some action with someone else. You should have just chilled and let her come to you. It's okay, we do these things. You were together for FOUR years. Her feelings for you aren't just going to disappear. If you want this girl back, you gotta let go for a while. Date some other girls and work on yourself. When she starts to miss you and things don't go right with this guy, she'll hit you up guarantee. You gotta reattract her again without being needy like you're being now</quote> I completely agree with this advice. The difference is that I don't think it applies in a long distance relationship where you are a flight away. It's not like I can give her time to think over her emotions and then we can meet up at a moment's notice to patch things over, or that we'll run into each other at one of our old haunts and reconnect. At this point our lives are only held together by sheer will. We were only seeing each other every 6-8 weeks or so for a year since she had to move back home. In my mind, if we don't put it back together fast, then there's no real hope. I just don't think it's possible to really rekindle a long distance relationship like that. And so I explained that entire mindset to her. I told her I would not make any more advances after she comes to see me this final time and that I was perfectly open to becoming friends afterwards, because the logistics of it just don't make any sense when you're a 2 hour flight apart, which makes total travel time like 7 hours one way because of the cities we live in. So for me, this was really it. And I just felt like she could have showed me a little bit of respect, given the difficulties of our situation.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Smashingpmkns 08/21/18 11:44:09 PM #49:	Honestly if this girl is flying out to pick up her stuff you could probably just send it through the mail. It'll be better for both of you. Best to not risk a Forensic Files situation. --- Clean Butt Crew <cite>Smashingpmkns posted [p:907323416] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote>Honestly if this girl is flying out to pick up her stuff you could probably just send it through the mail. It'll be better for both of you. Best to not risk a Forensic Files situation.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KhanJohnny 08/21/18 11:45:16 PM #50:	Ludwig Von 2 posted... KhanJohnny posted... Ludwig Von 2 posted... I dont think people owe others closure. I mean, why? If she had made up her mind she didnt want you back why does she owe it to you to sit there and listen to you make a final pitch? What does she lose by it? It's two nights following a four year long relationship. I held her shit the entire summer for free, including over two months after we've broken up. I'm letting her stay at my place for free instead of getting a hotel that'll cost her an extra few hundred bucks. What is so fucking hard about spending two nights with me where I was going to take her out on the town and treat her to food and drinks and sex, and maybe deal with a couple last appeals from me about why we should get back together? I told her not to feel worried about taking advantage of me, and that it was my pleasure? What does she gain from throwing an alleged non-serious, noncomital relationship in my face? I mean what do you gain? And as for that other stuff, I dont really think its all that special. Holding onto her stuff? I mean thats not really that huge of a deal. Staying with you? Again Ive had friends stay at my place before no problem. Again, not a huge deal. Buying dinner? Still, not that great. All of these things you are giving her arent all that much. Maybe in your mind they are but Im telling you these arent grand gestures here. Im going to tell you something that I hope one day you learn. I know you probably wont listen and thats okay, but here you go: People dont owe you anything. I know she doesn't owe me anything. But for someone who claims they want to continue being my friend, and who claims to still love me as a person despite everything that's happened, she really took a massive shit all over my feelings and expectations for no real reason. <cite>KhanJohnny posted [p:907323473] in My ex did ... [t:76925390]...</cite> <quote><cite>Ludwig Von 2 posted...</cite> <quote><cite>KhanJohnny posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Ludwig Von 2 posted...</cite> <quote>I dont think people owe others closure. I mean, why? If she had made up her mind she didnt want you back why does she owe it to you to sit there and listen to you make a final pitch?</quote> What does she lose by it? It's two nights following a four year long relationship. I held her shit the entire summer for free, including over two months after we've broken up. I'm letting her stay at my place for free instead of getting a hotel that'll cost her an extra few hundred bucks. What is so fucking hard about spending two nights with me where I was going to take her out on the town and treat her to food and drinks and sex, and maybe deal with a couple last appeals from me about why we should get back together? I told her not to feel worried about taking advantage of me, and that it was my pleasure? What does she gain from throwing an alleged non-serious, noncomital relationship in my face?</quote> I mean what do you gain? And as for that other stuff, I dont really think its all that special. Holding onto her stuff? I mean thats not really that huge of a deal. Staying with you? Again Ive had friends stay at my place before no problem. Again, not a huge deal. Buying dinner? Still, not that great. All of these things you are giving her arent all that much. Maybe in your mind they are but Im telling you these arent grand gestures here. Im going to tell you something that I hope one day you learn. I know you probably wont listen and thats okay, but here you go: People dont owe you anything.</quote> I know she doesn't owe me anything. But for someone who claims they want to continue being my friend, and who claims to still love me as a person despite everything that's happened, she really took a massive shit all over my feelings and expectations for no real reason.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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