Current Events > You ever feel like you deserve to be the way you are?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Like if you can't seem to escape from then it's probably because you deserve it.
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5'6 264 and I'm too lazy to exercise so no
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You don't deserve bad things e_e
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I thought you weren't religious.
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No. That's a foolish train of thought.
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GregShmedley posted...

MacadamianNut3 posted...

5'6 264 and I'm too lazy to exercise so no

Stop lying.

Ok fine >_> I did lose some weight so I'm down to 261
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As a occult leader, all I gotta say is...
I regret nothing
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GregShmedley posted...

Bruh. Didn't we meet at the DMV meet up?

Erm

A lot changes in half a year v_v
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chill02 posted...

You don't deserve bad things e_e

This. Life's going to be a struggle, as is anything, but that doesn't mean you deserve to get shit on.
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Honestly I've kind of felt like I'm just stuck lately

But I'm not doing anything to try and better myself

And I don't even feel motivated to try
And I don't even know if I care

So in a way yeah
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DezDroppedFreak posted...

Honestly I've kind of felt like I'm just stuck lately

But I'm not doing anything to try and better myself

And I don't even feel motivated to try
And I don't even know if I care

So in a way yeah

That's normal. The thing with depression and traumatic events is that it will demotivate you to do anything, then trick you into believing you're a bad person when you stop doing things. You're not a bad person, nor do you deserve bad things to happen to you because you fell prey to it. That having been said, when you're comfortable and able you should try and lift yourself up, but do your best to not get yourself down whilst doing that. Go at a pace you are okay with.
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Yeah. If I don't treat my body better I don't deserve to have a better body

I'm usually of the opinion that people who are "stuck" in a situation more often than not are stuck there only because they aren't trying hard enough, in some cases arguably even want to be there.

There's almost always something one can do. There are probably a few cases where literally no escape is possible, obviously, but it's far from the norm. I've generally seen little but people holding themselves back, myself included.

It's not about deserving, because in reality karma is bull. The worst people sometimes have the best lives, and the Mother Theresas of the world probably sometimes end up in shitty situations. It's not about deserving it - it's about how you pick yourself back up and get on in spite of it.
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Yes but to be fair, I brought this upon myself.
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I look at it like this.

If you don't work towards any goals, then you don't deserve anything those goals can result in.

Like if you don't exercise and eat like a slob, then you don't deserve a fit body.
Or if you don't work towards a career path you are interested in, then you don't deserve that career anyway.

On the other hand, life's a bitch and even if you work towards good goals, it doesn't mean you will actually achieve what you hope. So don't assume that automatically putting the effort in will make a difference and don't expect the best case scenario even if you ARE putting in the effort.

It's a bleak but realistic look at life IMO and it's gotten me through some bullshit in my past.
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chill02 posted...

You don't deserve bad things e_e

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Yeah, most of the time. I feel worthless, like no one cares, that I'm just garbage, that the reason no one wants to be with me(as friends, or anything more) is because I'm just not worth the effort.

You guys have helped change my mind though, I do feel liked sometimes now, but that still feels wrong and I struggle to accept it. I wish I were a better person, bolder and more confident, so others would want to get to know me or give me a chance. Instead I'm just a middle aged loser who will never amount to anything. Why should someone like that deserve anything? I've gotten exactly what I deserve in life, nothing.
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KogaSteelfang posted...

Yeah, most of the time. I feel worthless, like no one cares, that I'm just garbage, that the reason no one wants to be with me(as friends, or anything more) is because I'm just not worth the effort.

You guys have helped change my mind though, I do feel liked sometimes now, but that still feels wrong and I struggle to accept it. I wish I were a better person, bolder and more confident, so others would want to get to know me or give me a chance. Instead I'm just a middle aged loser who will never amount to anything. Why should someone like that deserve anything? I've gotten exactly what I deserve in life, nothing.

Let me tell you something not enough people know. Being average is fine. The go go go achieve achieve achieve buy buy buy do do do mentality was created by corporations to take your money and make us work(for them) harder and longer. Theres nothing wrong with wanting and enjoying an average life. Confidence in yourself will draw people to you. Ever hear of fake it till you make it? Its true. Heres a trick, whenever you find yourself thinking negatively, STOP. Manually just try to twist whatever that is into a positive. Its gonna take time and work but eventually you will retrain your brain into doing this automatically and before you know it your outlook and thus your actual life will begin to change. If youre feeling depressed but still need to go out force a smile on your face, hold the door for people, wave to people. It makes all the difference, trust me.
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Still_Rippin posted...

Let me tell you something not enough people know. Being average is fine. The go go go achieve achieve achieve buy buy buy do do do mentality was created by corporations to take your money and make us work(for them) harder and longer. Theres nothing wrong with wanting and enjoying an average life. Confidence in yourself will draw people to you. Ever hear of fake it till you make it? Its true. Heres a trick, whenever you find yourself thinking negatively, STOP. Manually just try to twist whatever that is into a positive. Its gonna take time and work but eventually you will retrain your brain into doing this automatically and before you know it your outlook and thus your actual life will begin to change. If youre feeling depressed but still need to go out force a smile on your face, hold the door for people, wave to people. It makes all the difference, trust me.

I'd absolutely adore living an average life. The way I'm living now is way below average. I do need to work on not thinking so negatively about myself though. When I do go out, I do hold the door for people, smile at them and greet them, and am very friendly. It's not enough to make any difference.
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KogaSteelfang posted...

Still_Rippin posted...

Let me tell you something not enough people know. Being average is fine. The go go go achieve achieve achieve buy buy buy do do do mentality was created by corporations to take your money and make us work(for them) harder and longer. Theres nothing wrong with wanting and enjoying an average life. Confidence in yourself will draw people to you. Ever hear of fake it till you make it? Its true. Heres a trick, whenever you find yourself thinking negatively, STOP. Manually just try to twist whatever that is into a positive. Its gonna take time and work but eventually you will retrain your brain into doing this automatically and before you know it your outlook and thus your actual life will begin to change. If youre feeling depressed but still need to go out force a smile on your face, hold the door for people, wave to people. It makes all the difference, trust me.

I'd absolutely adore living an average life. The way I'm living now is way below average. I do need to work on not thinking so negatively about myself though. When I do go out, I do hold the door for people, smile at them and greet them, and am very friendly. It's not enough to make any difference.

Change your thinking my friend. Judging by your sig you can afford a switch and a PS4, plus enough equipment to run a twitch channel. So Im assuming you have housing and internet and enough income to afford these things. There are literally millions of people who would kill to be you, seriously. You only get one life, wasting time being negative will never positively affect(effect?) you. Dont squander your time being alive, its too precious. What else are you searching for? Friends, a significant other? Theres lots of groups and sites for people with common interests to meet strangers and make friends.
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Still_Rippin posted...

Change your thinking my friend.

I'm working on it, but it's a slow process. Currently trying to find a decent job, get a place of my own, and get some space from my family.

Judging by your sig you can afford a switch and a PS4, plus enough equipment to run a twitch channel. So Im assuming you have housing and internet and enough income to afford these things.

I bought those things with tax returns each year when I was working. I'm currently not working, my savings are almost gone, and I'm staying with my mom using her Internet. Twitch is free, and I thought I might be able to earn a bit of money by just doing what I normally do, and I still managed to lose money after getting a donation. lol

What else are you searching for? Friends, a significant other? Theres lots of groups and sites for people with common interests to meet strangers and make friends.

Both friends and a girlfriend. I feel so lonely and unwanted. It's very difficult for me to meet people, I have social anxiety and depression, so I never go anywhere and when I do I try to avoid people. I hate being this way, what I want from life is the exact opposite of im capable of. I hate myself.
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KogaSteelfang posted...

Still_Rippin posted...

Change your thinking my friend.

I'm working on it, but it's a slow process. Currently trying to find a decent job, get a place of my own, and get some space from my family.

Judging by your sig you can afford a switch and a PS4, plus enough equipment to run a twitch channel. So Im assuming you have housing and internet and enough income to afford these things.

I bought those things with tax returns each year when I was working. I'm currently not working, my savings are almost gone, and I'm staying with my mom using her Internet. Twitch is free, and I thought I might be able to earn a bit of money by just doing what I normally do, and I still managed to lose money after getting a donation. lol

What else are you searching for? Friends, a significant other? Theres lots of groups and sites for people with common interests to meet strangers and make friends.

Both friends and a girlfriend. I feel so lonely and unwanted. It's very difficult for me to meet people, I have social anxiety and depression, so I never go anywhere and when I do I try to avoid people. I hate being this way, what I want from life is the exact opposite of im capable of. I hate myself.

I used to have crippling social anxiety. Im sure it stemmed from an extremely abusive childhood and a very early age of alcohol and drug abuse. I didnt even know what love was until I was a teenager because I never got it from my family. I can tell you right now the best way to combat social anxiety is to force yourself more and more into uncomfortable situations and just go through it. Its the only way to get past it, face it head on. And youre already trying to make a change and you are self aware enough to recognize your problems you want sorted out. So you already well on your way there. Its not a fast and easy thing to do but you should be proud because youre already taking the right steps to get to where you want to be.
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Still_Rippin posted...

I used to have crippling social anxiety. Im sure it stemmed from an extremely abusive childhood and a very early age of alcohol and drug abuse. I didnt even know what love was until I was a teenager because I never got it from my family. I can tell you right now the best way to combat social anxiety is to force yourself more and more into uncomfortable situations and just go through it. Its the only way to get past it, face it head on. And youre already trying to make a change and you are self aware enough to recognize your problems you want sorted out. So you already well on your way there. Its not a fast and easy thing to do but you should be proud because youre already taking the right steps to get to where you want to be.

I've been abused my whole life too. I never got involved with drugs or alcohol though. My dad would beat me, or make my mom do it. My brother hated me and would torture me as much as he could, he nearly killed me once by trapping me and knocking a beehive on me. My dad tried killing me a couple of times. I was bullied at school and never had any friends. I was never allowed to leave the house, and very rarely left my room at all. I never learned to socialize and almost every interaction with other people were either bad, or just neutral. I've had very few positive moments in my life, and when someone is nice to me I can't comprehend why... The only love I've ever known is from my manipulative mother, and kind comments from people here.

Talking to the people here made me realize just how bad I've had it in my life, and I've seen how most normal people live and I want that. It finally feels like something I could have, but it's still so far out of reach, and it's incredibly frustrating. I always imagined I'd be married with kids of my own by now, instead I'm a 34 year old dateless virgin. >_>
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*hugs Koga*
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KogaSteelfang posted...

Still_Rippin posted...

I used to have crippling social anxiety. Im sure it stemmed from an extremely abusive childhood and a very early age of alcohol and drug abuse. I didnt even know what love was until I was a teenager because I never got it from my family. I can tell you right now the best way to combat social anxiety is to force yourself more and more into uncomfortable situations and just go through it. Its the only way to get past it, face it head on. And youre already trying to make a change and you are self aware enough to recognize your problems you want sorted out. So you already well on your way there. Its not a fast and easy thing to do but you should be proud because youre already taking the right steps to get to where you want to be.

I've been abused my whole life too. I never got involved with drugs or alcohol though. My dad would beat me, or make my mom do it. My brother hated me and would torture me as much as he could, he nearly killed me once by trapping me and knocking a beehive on me. My dad tried killing me a couple of times. I was bullied at school and never had any friends. I was never allowed to leave the house, and very rarely left my room at all. I never learned to socialize and almost every interaction with other people were either bad, or just neutral. I've had very few positive moments in my life, and when someone is nice to me I can't comprehend why... The only love I've ever known is from my manipulative mother, and kind comments from people here.

Talking to the people here made me realize just how bad I've had it in my life, and I've seen how most normal people live and I want that. It finally feels like something I could have, but it's still so far out of reach, and it's incredibly frustrating. I always imagined I'd be married with kids of my own by now, instead I'm a 34 year old dateless virgin. >_>

As a person who treats everyone I meet kindly, you are wasting time asking yourself why, no point to that. Some people are just naturally friendly. Seems you have a tendency to overthink things until you think them into a negative light. Ease up on that, not everything is that complicated not worth the time and effort to try and understand. Frock wverything youve said you are stuck living in the past while simultaneously worry about the future, and before you know it youre 34 and youve never lived in the PRESENT. Just live in the moment, what would make you happy now? Do it. How many job applications have you filled out? Are you on any dating sites? You want friends and s girlfriend but you avoid going out and talking to people, counter intuitive you see? If you just sit around not changing yourself and your own attitude no one is just going to burst into your home and proclaim their love for you, some effort has to go in on your part. How you eat and you look can make you feel much better mentally as well. Whats your diet? When is the last time you bought new clothes? Do you comb/style your hair? All these are little things that will amount to self improvement. But you do actually have to do it. If its any consolation Im rooting for you man.
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