Current Events > Man shames woman after she sent his car plate to a friend part 2

(+) Yeah! (+)

original topic here
https://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/400-current-events/75632735

credit @Darmik

http://www.msn.com/en-au/lifestyle/smart-living/how-this-man-shamed-a-woman-on-their-first-date-proves-exactly-why-she-was-right/ar-AApkgXb?li=AA2FZ8I&ocid=ientp

According to a screenshot shared on Twitter, one male user posted, "I had a chick go behind my car and text my plate number to her homegirl before she got in the car with me."

This simple action took minimal time and shouldn't have offended her date. It was simply added security that the woman needed to feel comfortable on the date or give peace of mind to her loved one. However, this man didn't see it that way — most likely because he's never had to worry about the same things women have in these situations.

When another Twitter user asked if he ended up enjoying the date, he wrote, "I left her a-- there and went home lol. Not taking no woman nowhere that's doin all that."

Not only was there nothing funny about his response, but his reaction only proves why women feel the need to do this: there are guys out there who think this is a joke and don't even comprehend why a woman needs to always be concerned about her safety. Many tweeted in support of the woman, who was simply looking out for herself and her safety.

What do you think CE?

Was the woman in the right? Did the man truly do good?
She we all do this for fear we get drugged or kidnapped?
Or does this mean we are overly paranoid and untrusting?
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RedWhiteBlue posted...

You just want a 500 topic

I doubt it will get to 500 again.
I am sure people want to continue discussing this or else the last topic wouldn't hit 500.

Besides, I waited for other to make the part 2. No one did so I fulfilled the demand.
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Heh I knew the article was gonna trigger a lot of CE but I was surprised when I woke up to a closed 500 topic.
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I can't believe that hit 500 lol
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Rip man shames shot up to 97 car plates
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Dude might have thought the woman was one of those controlling types.

Like when they start going out she would bug his phone and things like that.
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Girl did nothing wrong. It'd be ok if a guy did this too. World's a crazy place, precautions are smart.
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Anyone who gets offended by something like this was probably planning on murdering you anyways, at which point you probably shouldn't go on said date.
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Imo it was insulting and he was right. What happened to the benefit of the doubt? Are we really living in a world where you just assume a guy is going to assault you? Well if you think so you read too many news stories.
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Muffinz0rz posted...

Anyone who gets offended by something like this was probably planning on murdering you anyways, at which point you probably shouldn't go on said date.

why go out with someone you think is likely to murder you?
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Imagine how insecure you have to be as a guy to cancel a date over this
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the average man is unfuckable

the average woman gets blasted by limitless chad dick
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ThePredominate posted...

Imo it was insulting and he was right. What happened to the benefit of the doubt? Are we really living in a world where you just assume a guy is going to assault you? Well if you think so you read too many news stories.

A date is not a criminal trial. Meeting strangers on the internet can be dangerous.
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lol, part 2.
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darkphoenix181 posted...

Muffinz0rz posted...

Anyone who gets offended by something like this was probably planning on murdering you anyways, at which point you probably shouldn't go on said date.

why go out with someone you think is likely to murder you?

Assuming this was a traditional first date meeting from tinder/okcupid/etc., it's not exactly that easy to get a good judgment of someone who wants to murder you. You could be talking with someone who speaks properly, uses good grammar, and keeps up with quality conversations. But if you go out with that person, and they get offended when you want to take just a minor, innocent precaution, then odds are that person is going to get offended by pretty much anything.
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FrisbeeDude posted...

Imagine how insecure you have to be as a guy to cancel a date over this

actually means he is more secure
he know he can get any girl

scar the 1 posted...

A date is not a criminal trial. Meeting strangers on the internet can be dangerous.

so why treat your date like they are in a criminal trial?
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darkphoenix181 posted...

actually means he is more secure
he know he can get any girl

Uh, no

He is demanding that everyone blindly accept him and get into his car without any sort of precautionary measures.

So, I guess if you meant to say "he knows he can get any dumb girl," then yes, you're right.
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Muffinz0rz posted...

darkphoenix181 posted...

actually means he is more secure
he know he can get any girl

Uh, no

He is demanding that everyone blindly accept him and get into his car without any sort of precautionary measures.

So, I guess if you meant to say "he knows he can get any dumb girl," then yes, you're right.

so according to you
all the girls who don't take a photo of his plate and send it to a friend are dumb?
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From the previous topic...

1. The article is horribly written and clearly some stupid click bait meant to incite outrage and potentially fuel 500 post topics on CE

2. Taking a picture of someone's license plate isn't really that great of a tactic anyways. It only helps after something bad has already happened to you. Taking a picture is also generally not subtle. Text the license plate number and/or the color and make of the car instead.

3. If she still felt compelled to snap the pic of the license plate she could have been way more tactful about it. If someone notices you doing it then you could have been way better about it.

4. She probably shouldn't have gotten in a strangers car on a first date. Meeting in public with your own transportation to and from is your best bet.

5. The vast majority of guys understand when a girl has to let someone know where they are going and who they are meeting with when meeting someone from a dating app. They also don't really like it being shoved in their face. It typically doesn't make for good date conversation and is stuff you are better off keeping to yourself and your friends who check up on you. It is a necessary reality, but so is shaving your legs, taking a dump, cleaning boogers from your nose, etc. Treat it like those things as they are all necessary, but very bad for conversation during a date.

6. There is never anything wrong with deciding to end a date at any point. It is up to you to just walk away whenever you want. You shouldn't shame your date when you walk away and they shouldn't shame you for walking away. If someone feels uncomfortable then they are welcome to leave.

7. If a girl wants to take a picture of my ID in case I rape, abduct, or murder her then I probably won't be in the mood for a date. I'll also worry about her trying to steal my identity. There does reach a point where a guy fears for his own safety and security when a woman tries to find information on the guy.

8. Girls absolutely can go overboard when "protecting" themselves to the point of it being invasive or offensive to the guy. Don't treat the date like you are building a CSI case against the guy. Some basic protection is ok like texting a close friend your location every now and then, but don't feel like you need to get his finger prints.

9. Both people have a need for safety and security when meeting up from a dating app. Both people should work with each other to establish this. Typically friend each other on Facebook or exchange phone numbers before meeting. Understand that each person needs to figure out that the other person isn't some crazy stalker.

Just some general guidelines and observations I made about the original topic.

The guy isn't right or wrong for ending the date and the girl is definitely wrong for being tactless about snapping the pic of the license plate. There is a difference between choosing to not communicate with someone and choosing to take pictures of something that can be used to track someone down. The guy could have thought this girl was a crazy stalker or just a weird person in general. The girl isn't entitled to take a picture of the guys license plate and still go on a date with him. He is always entitled (and so is she) to end the date at any point.
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I like how they're pretending to be a real news source but putting an obvious bias (for the right reasons)

I'm scared of it too. Women have very high chances to be abused, so yeah it can be scary being alone with new people especially when they're bigger or more intimidating than us.
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TommyG663513 posted...

It is a necessary reality, but so is shaving your legs, taking a dump, cleaning boogers from your nose, etc. Treat it like those things as they are all necessary, but very bad for conversation during a date.

Man SHAMES first date who took a dump and picked her boogers!
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darkphoenix181 posted...

Muffinz0rz posted...

darkphoenix181 posted...

actually means he is more secure
he know he can get any girl

Uh, no

He is demanding that everyone blindly accept him and get into his car without any sort of precautionary measures.

So, I guess if you meant to say "he knows he can get any dumb girl," then yes, you're right.

so according to you
all the girls who don't take a photo of his plate and send it to a friend are dumb?

I'm saying it's dumb to get into a car with a stranger without taking a precaution like taking a picture of license plates. It doesn't have to be exactly that. But something simple that takes literally (and I'm not misusing the word there) ten seconds, and can be the difference of a missing persons' case versus a problem solved very quickly.

They might be book smart, but it's street smarts to take a precaution like that.
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Muffinz0rz posted...

darkphoenix181 posted...

Muffinz0rz posted...

darkphoenix181 posted...

actually means he is more secure
he know he can get any girl

Uh, no

He is demanding that everyone blindly accept him and get into his car without any sort of precautionary measures.

So, I guess if you meant to say "he knows he can get any dumb girl," then yes, you're right.

so according to you
all the girls who don't take a photo of his plate and send it to a friend are dumb?

I'm saying it's dumb to get into a car with a stranger without taking a precaution like taking a picture of license plates. It doesn't have to be exactly that. But something simple that takes literally (and I'm not misusing the word there) ten seconds, and can be the difference of a missing persons' case versus a problem solved very quickly.

They might be book smart, but it's street smarts to take a precaution like that.

If you very honestly think you may be getting raped or killed by this guy to the point that you ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO get his license plate info to a friend then you probably shouldn't be getting into his car as a first date type of thing.

If a girl is that paranoid then she should meet at a public place with her own transportation lined up. That avoids this scenario completely. If she is still afraid enough to get into his car without taking a pic of his license plate on the second date then she is too paranoid.

Women don't get an endless license to any behavior in the name of protecting themselves. How do you expect a date to go well if the thought of "he may rape or kill me" is constantly in the back of your head. You have to live life a little and take some chances.

The vast majority of people won't harm you. That doesn't mean women should avoid any precautions, but they should relax a little bit too.
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If you're that paranoid maybe just stick to dating people you actually know through some social circle.
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WizardPowers posted...

If you're that paranoid maybe just stick to dating people you actually know through some social circle.

Y'all really think this is paranoia? At some point, with how often women are sexually assaulted, it's just basic precautions.

I imagine the same people slamming the girl are part of the "what, you're too good to say hi back?" group of men
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FrisbeeDude posted...

WizardPowers posted...

If you're that paranoid maybe just stick to dating people you actually know through some social circle.

Y'all really think this is paranoia? At some point, with how often women are sexually assaulted, it's just basic precautions.

I imagine the same people slamming the girl are part of the "what, you're too good to say hi back?" group of men

I'm not shaming her, just saying that yes, she's paranoid.
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FrisbeeDude posted...

WizardPowers posted...

If you're that paranoid maybe just stick to dating people you actually know through some social circle.

Y'all really think this is paranoia? At some point, with how often women are sexually assaulted, it's just basic precautions.

I imagine the same people slamming the girl are part of the "what, you're too good to say hi back?" group of men

Women are more likely to be assaulted by someone they know than a random person.

There are reasonable precautions and then there is being overly paranoid. Generally speaking, I don't mind getting in a strangers car for a first date anyways.

You should meet your first date in a public place with your own transportation figured out let some friends know your location and send them check in texts. If you still feel paranoid/uncomfortable with a person after one date then you probably shouldn't see them for a second date.

This whole hopping into their car and needing to take a picture of their license plate is such an avoidable scenario by both parties involved.

Quite frankly, if the guy thought the girl hopping into the car was a good idea for a first date and the girl was unwilling unless she could snap a pic of his license plate to her friends then it sounds like they just were not meant for each other.
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This did not need a second topic. This didn't need a first topic.
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darkphoenix181 posted...

RedWhiteBlue posted...

You just want a 500 topic

I doubt it will get to 500 again.
I am sure people want to continue discussing this or else the last topic wouldn't hit 500.

Besides, I waited for other to make the part 2. No one did so I fulfilled the demand.

If people wanted to continue discussing it, someone else would have remade the topic.

TommyG663513 posted...

Muffinz0rz posted...

darkphoenix181 posted...

Muffinz0rz posted...

darkphoenix181 posted...

actually means he is more secure
he know he can get any girl

Uh, no

He is demanding that everyone blindly accept him and get into his car without any sort of precautionary measures.

So, I guess if you meant to say "he knows he can get any dumb girl," then yes, you're right.

so according to you
all the girls who don't take a photo of his plate and send it to a friend are dumb?

I'm saying it's dumb to get into a car with a stranger without taking a precaution like taking a picture of license plates. It doesn't have to be exactly that. But something simple that takes literally (and I'm not misusing the word there) ten seconds, and can be the difference of a missing persons' case versus a problem solved very quickly.

They might be book smart, but it's street smarts to take a precaution like that.

If you very honestly think you may be getting raped or killed by this guy to the point that you ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO get his license plate info to a friend then you probably shouldn't be getting into his car as a first date type of thing.

If a girl is that paranoid then she should meet at a public place with her own transportation lined up. That avoids this scenario completely. If she is still afraid enough to get into his car without taking a pic of his license plate on the second date then she is too paranoid.

Women don't get an endless license to any behavior in the name of protecting themselves. How do you expect a date to go well if the thought of "he may rape or kill me" is constantly in the back of your head. You have to live life a little and take some chances.

The vast majority of people won't harm you. That doesn't mean women should avoid any precautions, but they should relax a little bit too.

See, the ones defending this are the ones you wouldn't want to get in a car with.

Think about it from the guy's perspective. Pretend you're on a first date. Assuming the goal is to get a second date, or, at the very least, to pork her, then you're going to want to be cool. She asks you for a picture of the license plate. If you want to keep your chances up of getting laid, what are you going to do, say no? What exactly do you hope she says after that? Do you really expect her to say "okay no problem!" and get right in the car? Of course not. Refusal of something so innocuous like that is a MASSIVE red flag.

Sometimes it's not that easy to set up your own transportation. Typically you'll be going to a public place anyways, but it's not uncommon for someone to have difficulty finding a ride or getting a bus or even being unable to uber (or not wanting to due to cost).

And you say "reasonable precautions" -- what's unreasonable about the license plate? It takes ten seconds. Find something more practical than that.

The guys should be respectful of women and the society in which they live. Women are generally more vulnerable. A guy shouldn't go out of his way to avoid giving women even a small sense of security.
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Muffinz0rz posted...


Um no. I would never schedule a first date with someone I've never met in person where they would need to get in my car at a very early point in the date. I always meet people in a public place and I drive myself there and back. There are steps you can take before a date or on the date that don't leave you in as vulnerable of a position. BOTH parties in this scenario seem to have, on some level, failed at that. The vast majority of the time this stuff really isn't a problem, but here we have a click bait article about it and here we all are hook, line, and sinker.

I also would not have been like the guy in the article and stopped the date right then and there. I would have been like "um ok, whatever" and thought it was really weird. It definitely wouldn't ruin the date for me, but it would be an awkward moment. If that is the only awkward weird moment then I wouldn't think anything of it, but if there are numerous moments like that then I'd think this date just isn't working out and either end early or not go on a second date.

I just think it is very ok to find her behavior to be awkward, clumsy, bordering on rude. If you want to end the date that early then you have the right to. Maybe he generally wasn't that into this girl in the first place and only sort of wanted to go on the date then the girl snaps a pic of his license plate. In that scenario, the guy is already looking for a reason to bail and she just gave him one.

Though you could also be a white knight and be all like "Women have it absolutely horrible and we must condone any and all of their behavior and any guy who isn't 100% in favor of everything a woman has to do to feel safe must not be a nice or caring person at all."
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TommyG663513 posted...

Um no. I would never schedule a first date with someone I've never met in person where they would need to get in my car at a very early point in the date. I always meet people in a public place and I drive myself there and back. There are steps you can take before a date or on the date that don't leave you in as vulnerable of a position. BOTH parties in this scenario seem to have, on some level, failed at that. The vast majority of the time this stuff really isn't a problem, but here we have a click bait article about it and here we all are hook, line, and sinker.

I didn't actually read the article, just the quoted block in the OP. But you can't sit there and pretend internet dating isn't a massive portion of how people are meeting these days. It's fine that you personally wouldn't partake. But it's very, very big and will continue to be. Those days of "seeing a stranger across the room or at a museum and striking up a conversation" are hardly prevalent anymore.

TommyG663513 posted...

I also would not have been like the guy in the article and stopped the date right then and there. I would have been like "um ok, whatever" and thought it was really weird. It definitely wouldn't ruin the date for me, but it would be an awkward moment. If that is the only awkward weird moment then I wouldn't think anything of it, but if there are numerous moments like that then I'd think this date just isn't working out and either end early or not go on a second date.

I agree. This happened to me once. Was it a little weird? Sure. There was a split second where it didn't really register why she wanted to do that. But one second later and I was like oh shit, she's obviously taking a precaution that doesn't inconvenience me at all, so I have no reason to object. In my case, yeah it was the only "awkward" moment. But again, I don't care if she sends check-in texts every 15 minutes. If I like this person and/or want to get laid, I'm going to put up with all that, especially when it costs me literally nothing.

TommyG663513 posted...

I just think it is very ok to find her behavior to be awkward, clumsy, bordering on rude. If you want to end the date that early then you have the right to.

It's okay for either party to think anything they want about the other. It's okay for either party to end the date at anytime. That's just common decency and basic communication. But in my situation, I hardly thought it was awkward, rude, or clumsy at all for her to take a picture of my license plate for extra security.

TommyG663513 posted...

Though you could also be a white knight and be all like "Women have it absolutely horrible and we must condone any and all of their behavior and any guy who isn't 100% in favor of everything a woman has to do to feel safe must not be a nice or caring person at all."

I'm not white knighting anyone. I'm just giving my two cents because I was in this exact situation and feel I reacted appropriately, while this guy did not. But it's just plain ignorant to sit there and pretend women aren't, in general, more vulnerable than men in situations like first dates. And don't twist what I just said -- I'm not saying men are impervious. They are too. It's just far more common for women to run into issues than it is for men.

I'm not saying men should bend over backwards to cater to every single whim. But if all it takes for a woman to feel secure is for me to stand there for an extra ten seconds while she gets a picture of my license plate, then it would be rude of me NOT to allow her that extra safety blanket.
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ChewedMint posted...

darkphoenix181 posted...

RedWhiteBlue posted...

You just want a 500 topic

I doubt it will get to 500 again.
I am sure people want to continue discussing this or else the last topic wouldn't hit 500.

Besides, I waited for other to make the part 2. No one did so I fulfilled the demand.

If people wanted to continue discussing it, someone else would have remade the topic.

and someone did
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Just acknowledge that this guy is entitled to feel it is awkward. Who knows what he wants or what he saw in her or what he's had to do in the past. The same goes for her towards him. Dating can be pretty fickle and highly subjective.

You understand this as an awkward move by the girl on your date. It didn't ruin yours, but it could bother someone else.

It is kind of weird to have a girl go "Oh this picture is in case you rape or murder me so now we can enjoy our date." We all have a different tolerance for dealing with weirdness in a romantic context.
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TommyG663513 posted...

Just acknowledge that this guy is entitled to feel it is awkward. Who knows what he wants or what he saw in her or what he's had to do in the past. The same goes for her towards him. Dating can be pretty fickle and highly subjective.

You understand this as an awkward move by the girl on your date. It didn't ruin yours, but it could bother someone else.

It is kind of weird to have a girl go "Oh this picture is in case you rape or murder me so now we can enjoy our date." We all have a different tolerance for dealing with weirdness in a romantic context.

yeah

if the guy stuttered and was shaking and the girl left him


no one would defend him and be like "how dare she!"

yet this girl does weird\awkward thing and has quite a following
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Muffinz0rz posted...

He is demanding that everyone blindly accept him and get into his car without any sort of precautionary measures.

So when you first meet someone do you take pictures of their license plate in case they kidnap you? Or demand to see their ID? Or fingerprint them?
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